It was a sudden event for Peon. It was so unexpected that he felt perplexed.
If he had seen her preparing meticulously days in advance as usual, he wouldn’t have been so surprised. He would have anticipated it to some extent. But there wasn’t even a hint of it.
Ah, on second thought, there was just one thing.
“Where will we have dinner tomorrow?”
The night before, Kaela asked something she normally didn’t. Honestly, Peon was delighted. It was extremely rare for her to express any preference about food.
Kaela seemed to be eating and digesting a bit better since coming to Ostein, but she had reverted back to her old habits, still causing him worry. She still ate sparingly, sometimes forcibly suppressing her appetite, and occasionally overeating to the point of vomiting everything.
After vomiting, she would then refuse to eat altogether.
Just ten days ago, after about three months, Kaela ate excessively and threw everything up before even digesting it. Then she barely ate anything. That’s why Peon was still on high alert, watching over her.
“Dinner? Is there somewhere you’d like to go?”
“…I’ll decide tomorrow.”
“Alright. Let’s do that.”
It was the first time Peon heard her say she wanted to go somewhere for a meal, so he had no reason to refuse. He simply nodded and prepared to take her wherever she wished.
But from the moment the sun rose, that day felt strange. Not ominously strange as he had often experienced, but strange in the sense that it was filled with entirely unpredictable and unprecedented events.
First of all, his wife, who usually indulged in laziness in Ostein and needed to be held and coaxed awake for quite some time every morning, got up abruptly before he could even wake her.
Then she suddenly planted a loud kiss on the cheek of her still-lying husband and got out of bed.
“…What’s going on?”
“Hmm?”
Kaela turned to look at her husband’s question and burst into laughter.
Her husband, who never slept properly and suffered from terrible nightmares, always sharp even in the morning, was staring at her blankly with his hand on his cheek. He was completely dumbfounded.
“Did I do something good?”
It was always him who kissed first in the morning, always him who embraced her first. The yearning person always clings first. Kaela, especially disoriented in the mornings, would nuzzle her face against his shoulder or neck, and that was her way of showing affection.
Peon was grateful even for that. Once she barely regained her senses, she would somehow shyly approach, lean against him, and let herself be hugged, so all he had to do was wait.
But her initiating? And a kiss at that?
“Yes. You did.”
Kaela even nodded while giggling brightly.
“What did I do?”
“Hmm, being my husband?”
That was precisely the role he was failing at most. Peon, who had been so preoccupied with examining the past that he’d lost his mind, began to wonder if he had gone completely crazy and was now seeing illusions.
“Kaela, be careful. You might fall.”
Even amid all this, he worried about his wife’s light, dance-like steps as she moved away from him. Kaela shook her head as she walked toward the bathroom.
“I’m not a child, wha—!”
Before she could finish her sentence, Kaela misstepped and staggered. Her hand that was slicing through the air with an “oh!” firmly grasped her husband’s thick forearm.
“…Huh?”
Huh? In the blink of an eye, her husband, who had clearly been buried in bed just moments ago, was now supporting her several steps away from the bed. Kaela slid right into his warm, solid, and large embrace.
“Huh?”
“Please.”
The silhouette of his wife, wearing only a flimsy muslin nightgown, was delicate.
“Kaela. Be careful.”
Please. Peon sighed. Every time he saw his wife moving away from him, he felt a chill. She might break a bone. She might suddenly collapse. And then she wouldn’t wake up for a long time. That caused him a familiar anxiety.
“Did I startle you? I’m sorry…”
“If you’re sorry, then empty your breakfast plate today.”
Since today was a special day, she could do that much for Peon. Kaela, being carried in his arms toward the bathroom, thought:
‘Then I’ll just put as much as I can eat on my plate.’
“I’ll serve your portion.”
“I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“You just said you were sorry.”
“Were you always this petty?”
“I might become less petty if you do what you did when you woke up again.”
“My goodness, you’re incredibly petty!”
Kaela’s eyes widened as she shook her head, then gave him another loud kiss on the cheek.
Is she in a good mood today? Is she feeling okay enough not to recall old memories? Peon observed Kaela, feeling pleased yet slightly anxious. A sinner could never let his guard down. It had become a deeply ingrained habit.
He mustn’t be careless. He couldn’t become complacent by arbitrarily deciding that he had paid enough for his sins. He remained vigilant and cautious.
Kaela could discover traces of his past and arrogance at any time and fall out of love with him. He always had to remember that she had more than enough reasons to leave her husband.
That way, he could catch her before she ran away.
“…Aren’t you going to tell me to eat more?”
At the breakfast table after washing and getting ready, Kaela glanced at him. She thought he would definitely say “just one more bite” since that was his habit.
“You finished it all.”
Well, that’s because today is special. Kaela rolled her eyes. But even on such a day, she had no intention of voluntarily taking one more bite for Peon’s sake.
“Thank you for finishing everything.”
I’m the one eating, why does he always thank me? A husband who is grateful for such trivial things yet ultimately indifferent to everything except Kaela. She pondered quietly, then as soon as the meal ended, she immediately began preparing to go out.
“Wear this, honey.”
While staying at Lanpalar Palace, where everything looked beautiful because his wife was beautiful—even the harbor and the foundation stones—Peon refrained from the loose attire he wore in Craine. This was his father-in-law’s domain.
He only removed his upper garments in the bedroom, and everywhere else he maintained a comfortable yet neat appearance. But the clothes his wife was now telling him to wear were ones he had never seen before, and they were almost formal attire.
“Where are we going?”
The new clothes were neatly wrapped in a box. After opening and checking the box, Peon asked Kaela, but she didn’t answer. She just smiled sweetly and asked:
“Do you like it?”
It was men’s outerwear suitable for the cool southern winter weather. It perfectly embraced his tall, robust frame and had an elegant, classic drape.
“I do like it, but…”
Isn’t that beside the point? Peon’s gaze, filled with questions, looked down at Kaela, who was touching his collar as if she were his maid.
“Yes. It suits you well. You look handsome. It’s a gift.”
“Thank you.”
Although he expressed his gratitude because he was genuinely thankful, he still followed Kaela’s head with his eyes, seeking an answer.
Kaela, having a past where she desperately observed others to survive, was still sensitive to his gaze. So she must know that he was questioning with his eyes, yet she merely carefully smoothed out the wrinkles.
“You should change too.”
A lady’s preparation for going out takes just as much time as a gentleman’s. But instead of getting ready to leave, Kaela kept bringing out new things. This time, it was another new box. By now, Peon was feeling constricted and uncomfortable, as if his neck were being tightened.
“Open it.”
Had Kaela not urged him to open it with expectant eyes, Peon would have eventually lost patience and said something. But he reluctantly followed his wife’s instruction and opened the box.
Inside were gloves, the kind he always habitually wore. But these were new ones, made of soft, high-quality leather, thinly crafted. The edges of the black gloves were embroidered with golden thread. They were obviously precious items.
“What do you think?”
Although Peon could treat gold nuggets like stones, as soon as he saw Kaela’s gaze as she clasped her hands together and asked, he knew. This was truly something to be cherished.
“You don’t like them?”
“They fit my hands perfectly.”
“Yes.”
“They feel almost like a second skin. They’re too precious to use when wielding a sword, but I want to wear them often.”
“It’s a gift.”
“Thank you.”
“I embroidered them myself.”
Peon’s expression immediately changed as he pulled Kaela’s hand. His violet eyes examined her smooth fingertips.
“I didn’t get hurt. You would have known right away if I had.”
“Do you know how dangerous it is to sew leather…”
“It’s very thin leather. It wasn’t difficult to handle.”
Kaela smiled broadly, but Peon couldn’t.
“You didn’t prick yourself?”
“It’s been a while since I finished them.”
“You did prick yourself.”
If it hadn’t been a deep puncture, Peon wouldn’t have known. Kaela would have suppressed her pain without making a sound, merely rubbing the pricked spot.
If he could only detect her heartbeat and breathing, should he also connect and perceive every tiny stimulus?
Though he had considered it for Kaela’s safety, it seemed too creepy, so he had refrained. But at times like this, he wished he could choose to be despised instead.
“You don’t need to do things like this.”
To the point of bleeding, why on earth, why for him?
“I told you, it’s a gift.”
Kaela rebutted with round eyes.
“It’s too much for me. Especially if you’re hurting yourself…”
“What’s wrong with embroidered gloves? This is all I can do for you.”
“What do you mean that’s all you can do? I’m grateful just for you eating well today. There’s no special occasion, yet you’re doing this even to the point of bleeding…”
Peon stopped speaking as he saw Kaela open her mouth wide. Why?
“You really didn’t know? Today is special.”
His gaze wavered anxiously. What had he forgotten? It wasn’t their wedding anniversary yet.
“Why?”
“It’s your birthday. Happy birthday.”
Ah. Peon covered his mouth. Ahahaha. Kaela laughed so hard she almost fell over.
“You didn’t know it was your birthday?”
“…I even forgot what day it is.”
Life in Ostein was that leisurely. With his increased abilities, he was enjoying an unbelievably relaxed winter. Even Kaela couldn’t believe her husband would say such a thing.
“Really? Still, it’s your birthday. Weren’t you expecting anything?”
“What meaning does the day of birth have? It’s just the day I was born.”
In Lusenford, despite all the preparations, it was just a day that ended with a fairly decent dinner.
The only person who properly celebrated his birthday, which was unwelcome from birth, was ultimately his mother, Evelyn. The Ravalley mother and daughter were merely formal, and the person who sincerely congratulated the boy who couldn’t meet his mother was…
Peon’s gaze, lost in thought, fell on Kaela again.
Yes. Just Kaela, who had awkwardly given him gifts since childhood. She who struggled to commemorate the Grand Duke’s birthday even in Lusenford. His mother and Kaela were all he had.
“No.”
She shook her head. With an expression that truly found it strange, she strongly denied the burden he carried.
“It’s a very important and most joyous day. If you hadn’t been born, there wouldn’t be a today.”
“…That’s true.”
He never contradicted Kaela’s words. It’s correct. It’s correct, but…
“Stop thinking and be happy!”
Kaela exclaimed, cutting through Peon’s complex thoughts.
“I am happy. Thank you. Is this why you’ve been preparing since morning?”
“Of course. Naturally. Today must be special, I tell you.”
“It’s already special. So?”
“Hmm?”
“So, where am I supposed to go, all dressed up like this?”
Kaela smiled broadly. If her maids had seen it, they would have thought that Her Highness now smiles much like His Highness the Grand Duke.
“Go alone.”
“By myself?”
“Yes. I’ve been thinking, and I believe it would be better for you to go alone first today. It might still be difficult, but at least go and show your face, even briefly. To your parents.”
Peon silently looked down at Kaela, listening carefully to what she was saying.
“It’s your first birthday after everything has ended. I think it would be good to pay your respects to your parents. You’ve never spent time with them. I’m not entirely sure, but at least have a meal with them.”
Wouldn’t that make for a special birthday? Kaela, who had never failed to celebrate Peon’s birthday, thought so.
“It would be proper to ask their intentions first, but I don’t have their contact information…”
She didn’t have the energy to try to find out behind Peon’s back, nor did she have the heart to tell Peon in advance. Just up to that point.
She could prick her fingers with needles to embroider leather for his birthday, but to put in more effort, to try to make it more perfect—Kaela was now too exhausted.
Now that everything was over, she couldn’t love with the same burning passion as the unscarred girl Kaela once did.
All of her past experiences had shaped the current Kaela de Chasser. She could tell Peon she liked him, but when it came to saying she loved him, the piercing pain and humiliation that suddenly came to mind made it impossible for her to speak.
So she didn’t spend a very long time worrying about her husband’s birthday. The harsh years she had lived through made it difficult to get excited imagining his happy face. She didn’t feel excitement. She just knew exactly what a day wholly dedicated to Peon should be.
“It should be a place only you know, so have a good time.”
Kaela spoke matter-of-factly as she gave him a gentle push. As she pushed him away, he caught her hand.
“Why would I go alone?”
For whose benefit?
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