꒷꒦︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ࣭ ⭑꒷꒦THERE IS NO WAY YOU LOVE ME꒷꒦︶꒷꒦︶ ๋ ࣭ ⭑꒷꒦
But Kieran turned and fled.
Just as he couldn’t face overwhelming despair, he couldn’t face overwhelming joy either.
Alyssa didn’t call out to stop him.
She simply followed behind, like a shadow in the afternoon sun.
The steady sound of her footsteps never faded.
He couldn’t compose the emotions flickering across his face.
He wanted to show her a calmer, more composed side of himself.
But Kieran couldn’t help it—he turned his head.
In the hallway, bright even without lamplight, he saw his wife standing on his shadow.
Her eyes, as if it were midnight for her alone, shone like stars.
Alyssa, hesitating, slowly approached.
Her scarred, rough hand reached for his shoulder—paused as if unsure—then gently held onto his arm.
Her eyes, still as vivid as ever, held only him.
Her touch, as careful as if she were brushing a feather, was warm.
“…Benoit Castle doesn’t normally accept guests in winter or spring,”
Alyssa was the first to break the silence.
“It’s an old rule, mostly forgotten since we rarely have visitors—but it still exists. I only allowed Young Lord Albrecht to stay because he’s your guest…”
Kieran slowly understood why she was bringing up something so seemingly irrelevant.
Stammering a bit, she looked up at him with determined eyes.
“…If that weren’t the case, he wouldn’t be allowed to remain at the castle.”
Alyssa, though she sometimes looked fragile enough to break, could be surprisingly strong.
Looking at her, Kieran smiled faintly—
This wasn’t luck or a rare moment.
This strength… this was her true nature.
Alyssa was, unlike him, a strong person.
Lowering his gaze for a moment, Kieran slowly shook his head.
A bitter smile crept onto his lips.
“If we did that, Your Grace would bear a heavy burden. The Emperor might interpret it as us hiding something.”
Of course, Alyssa knew that as well.
And yet, she still offered to do it—for him.
“…But, for a moment, I was genuinely happy to hear you say that.”
Kieran felt the same, but he hadn’t been able to refuse right away.
“I knew it would be too much for you… but still I wanted to say yes.”
Like a confession, words of helpless vulnerability spilled from his lips.
Alyssa simply looked at him, confused.
Her face said she couldn’t understand—if that’s what he wanted, why not just say so?
“Don’t you find someone like me… pathetic?”
At Kieran’s self-deprecating words, Alyssa immediately shook her head—but Kieran only smiled and continued.
“Even though I wanted to use you to run away.”
The blunt honesty of those words cut deep—both for Kieran and for Alyssa.
“Using someone for your own convenience, running from your problems just because you don’t want to face them… it’s a coward’s move.”
Alyssa’s eyes widened at that, and for a moment, she said nothing.
Kieran tasted the bitterness lingering on his tongue.
“…Is that really so wrong?”
But when she asked that quietly, Kieran’s eyes flew open in surprise.
His face was a swirl of emotions.
She had always seen him calm, like the surface of a still lake—so this expression felt unfamiliar.
And yet, Alyssa felt like she was finally seeing him. Really seeing him.
“If you want to run away… and if there’s a way to do it… then choosing that path—it’s not wrong, is it?”
Alyssa’s words came hesitantly, like thoughts she hadn’t even realized were hers spilling out.
“I’ve always wanted to run away.”
The small confession echoed loudly between them.
She lowered her gaze, dazed.
“But I never could. Not because I was brave or had some noble resolve. It was just…”
“…”
“There was nowhere for me to run to.”
Alyssa had always been standing at the edge of a cliff.
Even when she was stabbed countless times, she couldn’t push away the blades—because if she did, she’d fall and die.
“That’s… really hard.”
And the only one who had ever reached out a hand to her was Kieran.
Maybe it was presumptuous to say so.
Alyssa licked her dry lips and continued.
“You may not feel the same, but… I often thought about it like that. So…”
When she looked up, Kieran’s face was frozen in surprise.
She didn’t know if this could truly help him—but she offered the warmest smile she could.
“I’d be happy if I could be the place you run to.”
After that, the two of them returned to the bedchamber together.
Kieran was hesitant about heading there in the middle of the day, but—uncharacteristically—Alyssa pushed him firmly, refusing to back down.
Claudius had arrived at the estate when the sun was high, and now the sky was tinged with the hues of sunset.
In that short span, Kieran had exhausted himself emotionally.
Watching everything unfold, Alyssa had been anxiously pacing the entire time.
Now that he had finally calmed, her only thought was to get him to rest as soon as possible.
She looked ready to carry him there herself if it would get him to lie down faster.
In the end, Kieran agreed to go on the condition that he walked there on his own.
After a late lunch, he sank into an armchair, and only when his expression began to relax did Alyssa finally let out a breath she’d been holding.
“Please, Your Grace—have a seat too.”
Kieran gestured toward a chair.
Even though she had forced him to sit and not move, he felt uneasy seeing her still standing.
Alyssa blinked in surprise at being pulled along so suddenly, then glanced to one corner of the room.
Kieran followed her gaze and beckoned to Mirika as well.
“Mirika, you too. Sit.”
“…I’m fine, thank you.”
Mirika, flustered by the suggestion that she sit with her masters, tried to decline politely,
but Kieran shook his head as if it was nothing.
“We can’t just sit while you’re left standing. There’s plenty of space. Come on.”
Alyssa gave a small nod of agreement, and something flickered across Mirika’s usually impassive face.
She bowed her head slightly and eventually sat at the edge of a sofa.
Watching her, Alyssa turned back to Kieran.
“Would it be alright if I step out briefly in about an hour?”
“That’s not something you need my permission for, Your Grace.”
At Kieran’s firm reply, Alyssa hesitated, her lips twitching as she chose her words.
“I remember you saying that before. But this is about Young Lord Albrecht.”
Kieran had been ready to say it was fine—but then fell silent as Alyssa continued.
“I’m going to ask him to leave. Everything should be settled before dinner.”
Her quiet, almost whispered voice was both gentle and steady—so much so that it made Kieran want to nod instantly.
But he didn’t.
“Thank you. But… it’s something I have to say myself.”
Alyssa’s expression darkened at once.
She seemed to recall how emotionally shaken he had been in front of Claudius.
Her concern was not unfounded.
Kieran couldn’t guarantee he wouldn’t fall apart again when facing Claudius.
Maybe he would be just the same as before.
Even so—this was something he had to do himself.
“I’ll be alright.”
Kieran said it with a smile. And he meant it.
No matter what Claudius said to him—he would come back here, to Alyssa.
And so, he truly would be fine.
Alyssa, looking like someone watching a child wander too close to deep water, eventually nodded slowly.
“…Can’t you go after dinner?”
And with that, the heavy mood was blown away.
Kieran couldn’t help but laugh out loud.
“As you wish, Your Grace.”
Just as he smiled with crinkled eyes—he suddenly paused.
His left cheek stung oddly.
“…Mirika?”
When Kieran turned his head, he found Mirika staring intently at him.
The intensity of her gaze was so piercing it was almost unsettling, and he asked, startled,
“Is… is something wrong?”
“I—I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… It’s just that…”
Mirika hastily apologized, glancing back and forth between Kieran and Alyssa.
It was clear she had something to say, but her usual reticence kept her from speaking easily.
“If you’re more comfortable in Elshian, go ahead. I can understand it.”
Kieran still remembered the language his mother had taught him when he was a child.
Though his tongue had grown stiff from disuse, he could still understand it well enough.
At the unexpected permission, Mirika’s eyes widened.
She looked like she was about to shake her head in refusal, but after a moment’s hesitation, she nodded in agreement.
Then, in a voice neither Kieran nor Alyssa had heard from her before, she began to speak in Elshian.
Alyssa, unfamiliar with the language, simply watched quietly.
But Mirika, now speaking the tongue of her homeland, did not stumble over a single word.
Her voice flowed smoothly, like reciting a poem, calm and clear.
However, Kieran’s expression turned oddly flustered.
He responded in halting Elshian, but was swiftly cut off by Mirika’s sharp retort—crisp and definitive.
A few more words passed between them, and eventually Kieran let out a small sigh and nodded.
Surprisingly, Mirika smiled.
Just a slight lift of the corners of her lips—but for someone who had always worn a stony expression, it was a striking change.
Alyssa, curious about what had just been said, held back the urge to ask.
She didn’t quite have the courage to pry.
Kieran noticed the question in her eyes and gave her a sheepish smile.
“…I’ll explain later.”
💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛
It was probably something like “y’all so cute, have babies already” 😂
🫶🏻