The Age Of Arrogance

꧁༺Giles Raphelt༻꧂

 

After Dorothea had turned away coldly in a huff, Giles felt like the world he had stubbornly believed in was crumbling from the ground up.

 

‘Are the things I’ve believed in all this time…real?’

 

That thought was compounded after he received a reply to the letter he had sent to the estate.

 

Roy, the eldest son, had sent a reply to the letter asking about the situation in the capital and the situation in the estate, and it contained surprising news.

 

“Roy had a son… ?”

 

Giles, who was always in danger because of his travels with Carlyle, had gotten his eldest son Roy married at a young age. Roy himself didn’t want it, but what could he do if the eldest son of a family didn’t follow the wishes of the head of the family?

 

He thought he had done his duty as a father by finding a decent daughter of a good family for him, and that was all he knew about Roy and his wife.

 

However, this was the first time he had learned that Roy had a son. It seemed like it had been almost a year since he was born.

 

As if aware that Giles would reproach him for not letting him know, there was a word of apology added at the end of the letter.

 

I refrained from contacting you for trivial matters so that you, the busy father, would not have to worry about the estate.

 

However, the birth of an heir was a very important event on the family level. Roy couldn’t have been unaware of that fact.

 

That’s why Giles could read his son’s cold indifference between the lines.

 

[You don’t care about family matters, do you, Father? I didn’t even want to tell you because I knew you would be annoyed.]

 

“He didn’t even tell me the name of my grandson.”

 

In the past, he would have been angry at Roy, and even his wife and second son Seth, but now he felt strangely indifferent. As if he had expected this to happen.

 

[You don’t know anything, Father.]

 

Dorothea’s words kept weighing on his heart.

 

‘Did I really not know anything?’

 

He thought he knew everything. That’s why he wasn’t afraid of anything.

 

However, after the unexpected events started happening, he gradually became overwhelmed by anxiety.

 

The anxiety that he would lose everything he had achieved so far. The anxiety that he would be forgotten by everyone.

 

‘No, maybe I’m not even worth remembering?’

 

Perhaps all that he had worked so hard for and sacrificed for was nothing more than a matter of course to the other person.

 

Suddenly, he felt like he had aged all of a sudden.

 

As he rubbed his tired eyes, the butler approached him quietly.

 

“My lord. His Majesty the Emperor has arrived.”

 

“What? His Majesty himself… ?”

 

“Yes. We have already invited him into the drawing room, but… what shall we do?”

 

Carlyle had invited him to tea several times, but Giles had declined each time. He didn’t think he could face Carlyle yet with a straight face.

 

However, he couldn’t turn away the Emperor who had come to see him in person.

 

“I suppose I have to go.”

 

Giles sighed and stood up.

 

* * *

 

“May endless glory be upon Your Majesty. I, Giles Raphelt, present myself before His Majesty the Emperor.”

 

“Ah, Sir Raphelt. It’s been a while.”

 

Although he was embarrassed by his previous rejections and deliberately greeted him with the utmost courtesy, Carlyle was smiling refreshingly as if nothing was wrong.

 

“I am honored that Your Majesty has come in person.”

 

“I’m sorry I kept asking you to come when you’re not feeling well. But… it seems you really were unwell. Your complexion doesn’t look well.”

 

Carlyle, who naturally thought that the illness was an excuse and visited Giles, seemed a little embarrassed by Giles’ face, which was more haggard than he had expected.

 

Giles smiled bitterly.

 

“Since everything feels meaningless, my body has also become emaciated.”

 

“Meaningless? You have received your reward for your hard work and now you should enjoy the joy of life.”

 

At the words “reward for your hard work,” Giles should have felt proud and happy, but he felt empty.

 

But he knows. That Carlyle is sincere.

 

That man, who he recognized at a glance that he had the aura of an emperor, does not make false promises. He does not forget the hard work of his loyal aides.

 

‘After all, it’s my own problem that I feel disappointed in Your Majesty.’

 

The heart that had been resenting Carlyle until a short time ago had now lost its spirit and was turning the blade of blame towards himself.

 

So he spoke in a weak voice.

 

“Dorothea said the same thing. That I’ve changed since some time ago.”

 

“……Is that so.”

 

“I don’t know exactly when, but something seems to have gone wrong since then. It seems like there is no joy left to enjoy.”

 

Then, Carlyle, who had been looking at the teacup on the table, opened his mouth heavily.

 

“I’m sorry, but I can’t help but agree with Lady Dorothea.”

 

Giles’s hand trembled, but Carlyle continued.

 

“I remember that you changed around the time I was stripped of my crown prince status… Since then, you’ve started to prioritize your own thoughts over my orders.”

 

“Your Majesty, I…!”

 

“I know. You did it for me. You must have thought that I was not good enough, and that you had to protect me. I have never doubted your sincerity.”

 

However, the roles gradually began to reverse.

 

Giles should have always stayed in the role of helping Carlyle as his subordinate.

 

But at some point, he started making decisions and acting on his own.

 

“If I had moved according to your wishes, I might have been able to regain my crown prince status more easily and quickly. But I would have lost something bigger. I didn’t want to lose that.”

 

Pervaz and Asha.

 

Carlyle didn’t want to lose either of them.

 

And Giles knew that too.

 

“On the contrary, I tried to take it away from Your Majesty. Because it was changing you.”

 

“You didn’t like me changing? I think I’m a better emperor now than I would be before.”

 

So that was the problem.

 

During his time in Pervaz, Carlyle began to regain the pure passion of his childhood, and as a result, he shone brightly as before.

 

Not by himself, but by Pervaz and Asha.

 

“……I thought I was going to lose it.”

 

“Lose it? What do you mean?”

 

“When the moment of glory comes for Your Majesty, I wanted to be the closest to you. I wanted to praise the shining blessing of God that will descend on your hair and shoulders, right by your side.”

 

“You are of course my closest aide! What the hell were you worried about?”

 

Giles shook his head.

 

“Think back. It wasn’t me who was by your side every time you won, it was Her Majesty the Empress.”

 

Asha occupied Carlyle’s side, not only on the bloody battlefield, but also at the place where he celebrated his victory, at the place where he shared his laughter, and at the place where he congratulated others.

 

Even if Asha wasn’t there, it wouldn’t have made a difference. Because Asha occupied Carlyle’s mind.

 

“Haah……. Sir Raphelt.”

 

Carlyle sighed deeply.

 

He could understand Giles’ feelings, but at the same time, he felt suffocated.

 

“You have been helping me since I was a child, and I have never forgotten your sacrifices. Haven’t I given you that much trust?”

 

No. Giles knew that too.

 

Even in a situation where he deserved to be hanged for disobeying orders, Carlyle would have turned the barracks upside down, but he would not have drawn his sword on me.

 

‘Even though he was misunderstood by Countess Pervaz, he never blamed me in front of her.’

 

At that time, he was only disappointed that Carlyle didn’t understand his feelings, but now he thinks he knows what Carlyle was feeling.

 

‘Why did I act like a blind horse back then…….’

 

Only now did he wonder about himself, who was running towards only the front.

 

Following the question that followed the tail, he came to a somewhat embarrassing answer.

 

“I was jealous of…… Countess Pervaz, now Her Majesty the Empress. I was so jealous I couldn’t stand it.”

 

“What?”

 

“Your Majesty, I have never seen anyone before or since, who could maintain their presence by your side without being overshadowed in the slightest.”

 

“…….”

 

“I wanted to be that kind of person. I was too ambitious.”

 

That’s why he coveted the position of Carlyle’s father-in-law. He thought that if he was tied to the family, he could become that kind of person.

 

How foolish.

 

Now, it is so easy to see his childish heart, but he didn’t know it then. No, he was deceiving himself.

 

Giles sighed again and said.

 

“I now know my crime. So please speak freely.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Where is my place? Didn’t you come here today for that? I will gladly follow Your Majesty’s will, even if it is to the dungeon.”

 

Carlyle was secretly impressed by Giles, who already knew everything. Of course, Giles seemed to be misunderstanding something.

 

“Do you think I’m crazy enough to let a talent like you rot in a dungeon?”

 

“Are you still trying to use me?”

 

“Of course. Talent is always in short supply.”

 

Carlyle thanked Giles for speaking up first and said.

 

“The position of Academy Director is vacant. It was once yours, Sir.”

 

However, it was a position he had been forced out of for absurd reasons because he was Carlyle’s tutor. Now, it was a position that could not be called a promotion for Giles.

 

“I want to return the genius of the century, which I monopolized, to the Academy.”

 

Giles smiled at Carlyle’s heart, which still called him a “genius of the century.”

 

“……I understand.”

 

“You know it’s not a demotion. I believe that’s where you can truly use your talents.”

 

Giles nodded, since he would have followed even if it had been to prison.

 

However, Carlyle’s business was not over.

 

“Ah! And there’s a wedding in Pervaz in two months. Come with me.”

 

“That’s……. Well, I think they’ll hate it there.”

 

As Giles’ face darkened, Carlyle held out an invitation in front of him. The addressee was Giles.

 

“Miss Dorothea is a much wiser and more compassionate person than you think. She will be happy to have you there, so don’t worry.”

 

Giles felt his neck flush with shame again.

 

‘Am I the foolish one who worries his daughter?’

 

He rubbed his dry hand over his wrinkled face once and nodded.

 

“I understand. I will have the family of the estate go with me as well. And until then, I would like to go down to the estate and take care of my family.”

 

“That’s a good idea. Let’s do it that way.”

 

After giving Giles a few more words of encouragement, Carlyle turned and left.

 

And Giles, who was looking down at the invitation in the empty drawing room, slowly nodded his head.

 

‘Yes. At least I have to be a proud grandfather to my grandchildren.’

 

It would be difficult, but he vowed to try to fix everything that was wrong, little by little.

 

After all, even the darkest night must give way to a new day.

* * * *

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