MLIIWTFL Chapter 165

 

 

 

“Ez, if you’re too tired or anything, maybe just close your eyes for a bit.”

 

“I’m a bit tired, but it’s fine. I’m used to this.”

 

Ezkhiel leaned back in the carriage seat that had just started moving and gave Letticia a smile in response to her concern.

 

But even with his words, Letticia couldn’t put her worry to rest.

 

“Just because you’re used to it doesn’t mean it’s not hard. Your face would always go pale whenever you saw that guy!”

 

“That was… more because of something else than the young lord himself.”

 

“Something else?”

 

Letticia tilted her head and asked. Ezkhiel hesitated and lowered his eyes slightly.

 

“…All the women I spoke or danced with at social gatherings were ones my parents had arranged potential marriage talks with. But since they were all there on their parents’ orders, the moment Lord Jarvis came over to talk to them, they would act like they’d just been waiting for him and went straight to him.”

 

“Wait, are you telling me that stupid peacock guy swooped in and snatched up every girl you were with? He really does the most.”

 

“Peacock…”

 

At Letticia’s nickname, Ezkhiel let out a small laugh. The burden and tension from having to talk about something heavy were, for a moment, forgotten thanks to that one word.

 

“And those girls too—what the hell? These weren’t just dance partners, they were meeting someone for an arranged marriage set up by their parents, and they just ditched that?”

 

“Because it was Lord Jarvis. Since he’s the heir to a marquisate, they probably thought it was worth risking everything—even breaking off an arranged marriage.”

 

“Even so, that’s just rude to you. Not exactly classy behavior.”

 

Letticia crossed her arms and clicked her tongue. Ezkhiel didn’t nod but simply smiled.

 

Despite how free-spirited she could seem, she always stuck to common sense and manners—and in times like this, he really appreciated that they saw eye to eye.

 

“Still, that wasn’t what really hurt me. I never had high hopes to begin with.”

 

“Then what was it that made it so hard for you? Don’t tell me that stupid peacock laughed at you after stealing those girls?”

 

“That happened too, but… honestly, what hurt the most was when my parents found out.”

 

The atmosphere inside the carriage instantly grew heavier. Ezkhiel had hinted before that his relationship with his parents wasn’t good, but this was the first time he spoke about it directly.

 

“Even though I’ve moved out, my parents still believe they have the right to interfere in my marriage. Every time one of these engagements fell through, they’d get furious—saying they went through all the trouble of arranging it and I couldn’t even make that work…”

 

“So you were imagining your parents getting mad at you, and that’s why you looked so pale? Just how badly did they get angry?”

 

“…Remember when you asked me why I hadn’t eaten cookies for ten years?”

 

Ezkhiel started to speak but couldn’t bring himself to continue so easily.

 

He had postponed telling the story even when Letticia visited his home, saying he’d explain next time. But even now, preparing to talk about it was much harder than he expected.

 

Listening to someone else’s dark past can be exhausting.

 

They might think they’re speaking objectively, but in reality, it often comes off as lamenting and pleading to be understood.

 

Still, since he’d promised Letticia, Ezkhiel had no choice but to speak. He prayed he could at least talk about it in a calm and composed way.

 

“There were cookies left over from tea time, and I was curious about the taste, so I tried one. It was my first time having that kind of snack, and it was so good that I just kept eating without thinking. But then my mother saw me, and…”

 

As he spoke, the memory resurfaced and Ezkhiel tightly closed his eyes. The memory had faded a bit, but the fear and shock he’d felt then were still vivid.

 

“Mother said that men shouldn’t eat such things, snatched the cookie from my hand, threw it on the floor, and screamed. Then my father, after hearing about it from her, said the reason I liked that sort of thing was because I was weak—and he punished me.”

 

“What kind of punishment? Did they starve you or something?”

 

“…First, I was slapped across the face. Then I was hit on the calves with a birch stick. Until I swore I would never eat cookies again.”

 

Letticia’s expression hardened. But Ezkhiel, already struggling to talk about it, didn’t notice and continued.

 

“My father is incredibly strict. If I didn’t behave the way he expected, that’s how he’d discipline me. And my mother… like I’ve told you, she’s the type to make everything someone else’s fault. She’d go on and on, saying she raised me wrong, that I was a mistake, that she should never have given birth to someone like me.”

 

“Are you kidding me? Like anyone gets to choose their mother before they’re born!”

 

Letticia’s furious shout shook the entire carriage. Startled, Ezkhiel looked up to find her enraged face right in front of him.

 

“What kind of lunatic parents do that? All because a kid ate something sweet? Slapping and beating with a stick? Maybe they should get beaten the same way to realize how wrong that is!”

 

“…Among old noble families, I think it’s probably common. My older brother said he was punished a few times when he was little too—”

 

“That’s a barbaric, outdated custom! Even my cousins out west never went through anything like that!”

 

Still fuming, Letticia grasped both of Ezkhiel’s hands. Unlike the usual ticklish feeling he got when they touched, this time her grip gave him a strange sense of peace.

 

“Wait—do they still treat you like that? Chasing you with a stick, yelling about how you’re disgracing the family or something?”

 

“Well… I’m an adult now, so no more caning… but when they get angry, they still throw things. Sometimes they hit me. Mostly my father does. My mother just cries.”

 

So I called for the knights and asked them to escort them out, Ezkhiel added. Letticia nodded in approval.

 

“You don’t have to put up with that kind of treatment. If it happens again, come to our house. Everyone will welcome you with open arms.”

 

“…I really wish my parents had been like yours.”

 

The words slipped out before Ezkhiel could stop them. Being around Letticia made him relax so much, he often said things he hadn’t planned to.

 

But Letticia didn’t look offended at all. She nodded gently.

 

“My parents are really good, I’ll admit that. All three of us siblings have strong personalities, but they’ve never scolded us for that even once.”

 

“I’m jealous. My parents always wanted me to be like my older brother… but no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t.”

 

Even after being beaten until his legs were swollen, Ezkhiel still eventually left his parents’ shadow and rediscovered sweetness.

 

The bitter coffee and heavy, greasy meals he was forced to eat at home—he hadn’t touched any of it since moving out.

 

What if his parents had acknowledged who he was earlier?

 

Ezkhiel tried to imagine it, but the only thing that came to mind was being treated like he didn’t exist.

 

“…Ez.”

 

Just as Ezkhiel was about to sink into a gloomy state of mind, someone calling his name snapped him out of it—and startled him.

 

Letticia had moved to sit right next to him without him noticing, and now her face was incredibly close.

 

“L-Letty? Your face is a little too close…”

 

As he pulled back in surprise, Letticia quietly looked at him and asked.

 

“Ez, how far are you okay with physical affection before engagement?”

 

“P-Physical affection?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

The sudden change in topic flustered Ezkhiel.

 

“I’ve never really thought about it… Why are you asking all of a sudden?”

 

“Because I’m deciding whether I should kiss you now, or just hug you.”

 

Letticia said it with a completely calm expression, but Ezkhiel’s mind went completely blank.

 

“K-K-K-Kiss… Me?”

 

“Who else would I kiss if not my own boyfriend?”

 

“R-Right… that makes sense…”

 

Ezkhiel looked away, his face bright red, while Letticia pouted slightly.

 

Since starting their relationship, they had held hands, linked arms, even hugged—but kissing still felt like something far in the future to him.

 

“If you don’t want to, you don’t have to say it’s okay.”

 

“N-No! It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just… kind of sudden? A little surprising, maybe?”

 

“Then just a hug?”

 

“…..…”

 

Ezkhiel couldn’t answer and looked around nervously.

 

Even in this moment, he was clearly trying to figure out what would be best for Letticia—and seeing that, Letticia spoke firmly.

 

“Ez, I know you always think of me first. But right now, I want to hear what you want. What do you want me to do?”

 

“…..…”

 

Instead of an answer, their eyes met.

 

Those green eyes, the color of the green garnet she had chosen for him, held no sign of rejection. Instead, they were filled with quiet acceptance.

 

Letticia smiled, placed her hand on Ezkhiel’s shoulder, and gently brought her face to his.

 

More than the thrilling descriptions she’d read in romance novels, the warmth of their lips meeting as they closed their eyes filled her with a sense of excitement she hadn’t expected—and she was just a little curious what he’d say if she told him that.