Your Majesty, I'm not a man.

YMINM | Chapter 2. Wanting to Become a Mistress Instead of Empress? (2.2)

“What?”

 

At the mention of what followed, Kasion’s expression changed as he looked at the steward. Did Levania make an appointment just to say something like that after all these days?

 

‘No, perhaps this is a ploy to meet me before the wedding.’

 

“Let me see the letter.”

 

As Kasion spoke, the steward quickly handed Levania’s letter over. Upon tearing open the envelope and scanning the contents, Kasion found the same message written in a polite and cautious tone.

 

‘She asks to be taken as a concubine instead of an Empress?’

 

It was an astonishing content.

 

‘Excessive servility. Like father, like daughter.’

 

Frowning, Kasion handed the letter back to the steward.

 

“If she wishes it, then so be it.”

 

“In that case, would you like to cancel the wedding altogether?”

 

If she was to be taken only as a concubine, the wedding was unnecessary. Those who brought concubines along to the wedding were already in a relationship with them. Kasion’s blue eyes gleamed ruthlessly.

 

“Yes, that’s how it should be. Since the daughter of Wendel seems eager to embrace me, cancel all the wedding arrangements and advance the schedule.”

 

The news of the cancellation of the wedding struck the noble families like a thunderbolt. They thought she would become the Empress, but a concubine! Fortunately, the Emperor didn’t even imply that it happened because Levania wanted it. He simply informed them unilaterally.

 

With the cancellation of the wedding, which was scheduled for two months later, Levania was ordered to enter the palace three weeks later. Once again, Zelenka blamed Levania, saying her behavior was not proper, and that’s why she couldn’t become the Empress and became a concubine instead.

 

“It’s all because of you that I can’t show my face!”

 

Despite Zelenka’s sharp voice, Levania showed no reaction. While she seemed annoyed at the loss of the noble status, she also seemed relieved.

 

Rather than becoming the Emperor’s mother-in-law, she judged that she would not have a chance to talk to the Emperor at the banquet.

 

“Since the entry into the palace has been moved up, there’s a lot to do.”

 

Levania left calmly. Zelenka wanted to hold her back and vent her frustration, but Levania looked at her with a cold face.

 

“If someone sees, they might think it’s not me, but my mother who’s becoming the Emperor’s concubine.”

 

“What, what?! You’re so harsh that I ended up like this! Are you listening, Lenny?!”

 

“Vent your grievances to your maidservant. Doesn’t that child at least receive some money?”

 

Zelenka’s mouth hung open in astonishment. Seeing her pouring out complaints with false tears, Levania left the room. With only three weeks left until she entered the palace, all she had to say was that…

 

“It’ll be okay.”

 

Magi held Levania’s hand like comforting her. Levania smiled bitterly at Magi’s affectionate gesture. If she settled in a distant village beyond the borders of the empire, perhaps she could think like that.

 

“I’ll be fine. But more importantly, I have something to say. Let’s go upstairs.”

 

Levania led Magi to her room on the third floor. Although she had changed the wallpaper and furniture several times since her childhood, the old atmosphere still lingered. No matter how painful things were, she could feel comforted here.

 

But even that was only until three weeks later. After entering the palace…, once she escapes from there, she would never be able to return here.

 

“Magi… After I enter the palace, it will be difficult for me to look after this household. A new heir will come in, and there will be time until a child is born… Father will probably try to send you away.”

 

There had never been a concubine who entered the palace with her maidservant. If she were entering as an Empress, it might be possible, but Levania, who had plans to escape beyond the empire’s borders, had no intention of pushing Magi into such danger. She needed to be in a safe place.

 

“Yes, I’ve always had Magi by my side since I was young. My mother, who shares my blood, is alive, but neither my mother nor my father show affection, so…”

 

During her childhood, when she was still weak and her heart wasn’t firm yet, Levania had suffered a lot from Maxime and Zelenka’s attitudes. If Magi hadn’t been by her side during those times, it would have been unbearable.

 

“Miss, why do you say that, as if we won’t see each other again…?”

 

“After entering the palace, I don’t know what will happen. I hope Magi will be happy.”

 

“My happiness comes from your happiness.”

 

Levania nodded. Magi had taken care of her for a long time, but she also had a family. Her husband used to be a groom at the Duke’s and then left after getting injured, and her daughter worked as a maid at the Duke’s.

 

“Magi, you know my personality. Even when I enter the palace… I might clash with His Majesty. Then Duke might get angry. If that happens, I’d rather you not be at the Duke’s.”

 

“What kind of ominous thing are you saying! Miss, you will get along with His Majesty just fine. Once His Majesty gets to know you properly, he’ll quickly fall for you. Who wouldn’t love you?”

 

Levania just smiled bitterly at Magi’s affectionate words. Despite being her parents’ children, Maxime and Zelenka had not shown affection to Levania. Could someone who hadn’t been loved by their parents be loved by someone else?

 

Of course, she knew there was someone like that.

 

But Levania found it difficult to be confident. Even if there hadn’t been Albert, who was supposed to be her partner, she wouldn’t have had the confidence.

 

‘Albert… Albert would have liked me.’

 

Before she regained her memories from her past life, she didn’t know that Albert liked her. Because she lacked confidence. Was that why? Even now, Albert seemed to have liked her just as the setting in the original work dictated. Not because she was anything special.

 

“Thank you for saying that, Magi.”

 

Levania let go of Magi’s hand and approached the dresser. From the drawer, she took out a delicately carved box, causing Magi to look at her in bewilderment.

 

“I wanted to buy you land and a house… But since it’s buying land in your hometown, Magi, you’ll probably know better and be able to live there.”

 

As she handed the box over, Magi opened it with a bewildered expression. Inside were gold coins, jewels, rings, bracelets, and more.

 

“Miss, these…!”

 

“I want to give you these. Please don’t refuse.”

 

“But if you enter the palace, you’ll probably need to spend a lot of money…”

 

The only expense for a concubine would be for adornment. Levania had no such intention. Even if she attracted Kasion’s attention, it wouldn’t do.

 

“That won’t be necessary. His Majesty… doesn’t particularly favor women.”

 

“But still…”

 

“Think of it as my wish. Whenever you think of Magi, I hope you’ll feel relieved, thinking that you’re living happily in your hometown with this money. Right? Please.”

 

Tears streamed down Magi’s cheeks as she listened to Levania’s words. Levania hugged Magi, who was crying. If there was someone who would be most surprised to hear that Levania had escaped from the palace later, it would be Magi. At that time, Magi hoped that Levania wouldn’t get hurt.

 

“…I remember being loved by Magi. Be well wherever you are. Eat well, sleep well… Endure everything well. So don’t worry about me and live happily with your family wherever you want, even if it’s far from the capital.”

 

“Got it…, I understand, miss….” 

 

Magi answered, tears streaming down her face. Levania held Magi’s hand and prayed to the gods for Magi’s safety and happiness.

 

* * *

 

Zelenka didn’t return to the mansion for days, as if she were the most wounded person. Maxim also went down to the country villa where Hans had been sent.

 

Levania felt disappointed but decided to see it as a blessing in disguise. With the two gone, it became easier to send away those they had cherished outside the mansion. Levania especially paid off five maids who had been close to her and sent them to the mansions of other nobles.

 

Levania gradually gave those who remained things that could be considered as savings. Just in case they needed to live outside the mansion.

 

She wanted to imply that she might escape, but doing so could expose the plan. She didn’t want to tie their safety to the emperor’s whim.

 

As Levania tidied up her surroundings in this way, three weeks flew by. Since the wedding dress she had prepared was canceled, Levania chose to wear a dress she disliked. It was a dress she hadn’t worn even though she received it as a gift, as the color didn’t match her hair.

 

It was the dress Zelenka had given her.

 

“You’re late,” Magi said anxiously, looking at the door of the mansion.

 

Although the carriage had arrived to take Levania from the palace, neither Maxim nor Zelenka had returned. Levania glanced briefly at those who had come from the palace.

 

The carriage was accompanied by grooms, attendants, and six escort knights.

 

“I think we can leave now.”

 

“But, miss…”

 

It might be their last farewell, something they didn’t want to share. Levania looked at Magi with a forced smile.

 

“I’ll find happiness on my own. Magi, you must live well in your hometown.”

 

“Of course. Miss, you will surely find happiness.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Levania kissed Magi’s cheek and received a kiss herself. Her belongings had already been moved to the palace. The attendant opened the carriage door, and the escort knights took her hand.

 

As the carriage’s sound echoed, Levania turned around, but neither Maxim nor Zelenka was there. The only one who came to see her off was one of the maids Levania had sent out of the mansion earlier.

 

Levania hugged her too and then got back into the royal carriage. Waiting for someone who didn’t come was always the worst.

 

‘I… I want to leave this empire,’ Levania thought. It was time to start her own life properly. She looked at those who had come to see her off until she reached the main gate of the mansion.

 

To remember them, Levania kept them in her sight for a long time.

 

* * *

 

The carriage entered the palace and headed towards the emperor’s harem, where the concubines lived. The emperor had as many as 38 concubines. There used to be more, but now that number was enough, either being killed by the emperor or becoming disgraced and expelled.

 

The two women dedicated to the palace were the lady bestowed upon by the palace and the princess sent as tribute from a small country.

 

The palace and the empress’s palace stood side by side, with the harem located behind the empress’s palace. It was a place for the emperor, but it was managed by the empress. However, since there was no empress in the Adallak Palace, it was left unattended.

 

It was a design to prevent the emperor from visiting concubines more often than the empress. Most emperors simply summoned the concubines they desired to their chambers, rendering the design meaningless.

 

Levania found herself in such a situation. Kasion had only brought Levania into the harem of the palace, without scheduling her to share his bed that night. Therefore, Levania could spend that day unpacking her belongings in her own chamber.

 

There were eight maids and attendants given to concubines in the harem. This was only true for the daughters of nobles and royalty from other countries. Those of lower status had their servants reduced by half. There were only two escort knights, and four soldiers were stationed near the chambers.

 

Living as a noble’s beloved daughter, Levania confirmed whether the rumors she had heard about the harem during her time in the noble’s mansion were true.

 

Even though they entered the harem, it wasn’t difficult for everyone to adjust. Those brought in as maids from other countries had restricted areas of residence, but for those like Levania, who were of noble imperial descent or dedicated for diplomatic purposes, outings were ocKasionally possible.

 

“Hmm, escaping might be easier than I thought.”

 

Most of the rumors circulating in society were about princes or nobles brought in from other countries. Knowing the emperor’s temperament, it was rare for someone to offer their children to him within the empire.

 

Although a new member had joined the harem, the concubines didn’t pay much attention. Some felt ashamed to be treated as women with men’s bodies, and others had people assigned to them for surveillance. 

 

Levania was surprised to be given residence in the same palace as the men. Though the number of women was small, she hadn’t expected this.

 

‘No wonder there are rumors that the emperor isn’t interested in women.’

 

If she had considered the women brought in as her own concubines, she wouldn’t have placed them in a position where they could easily meet other men.

 

“Miss Levania, we are the maids who will serve you from today.”

 

Upon seeing the assigned maids, Levania nodded silently. The maids seemed to be chosen for their skills and quick wits, considering Levania was almost going to become the empress. Since it was ultimately a strategic marriage, it was considered that Levania could become the empress depending on the political situation in the future.

 

The luggage sent ahead had already been unpacked. Levania ensured everything was in its place before having dinner brought to her. Hearing from the attendant that the emperor wouldn’t summon her today, she felt relieved and decided to dine peacefully.

 

* * *

 

Was the emperor really that fearful?

 

Hans, who had left the capital with his guards upon Maxim’s request, was amazed. The provincial town was not just any town but a remote countryside. The only decent building was Wendel’s mansion, the only pseudo-city.

 

Though annoyed, Hans decided to keep quiet for a while. He worried about Albert, but as long as Maxim supported him, he wouldn’t attract any trackers.

 

‘He’ll be fine. Albert is a swordsman after all.’

 

He couldn’t help but think he had raised one good son. There was nothing to do in the countryside. All he did was ocKasionally hear news from the capital.

 

News hardly reached the remote countryside. The rumors circulating in the city were mostly outdated news that Hans already knew.

 

After a few days, Maxim suddenly descended with his servants.

 

“She’s not the empress…, she’s a concubine?”

 

Suppressing his laughter, Hans listened carefully to Maxim’s words. Maxim seemed to be complaining, but he was actually relieved. Hans quickly caught on to that.

 

‘What a foolish girl. If only she had married our Albert long ago, she wouldn’t have ended up as the emperor’s concubine.’

 

Hans remembered Levania’s ruthless attitude since the discovery of Albert’s letter. So, Levania’s misfortune brought him more joy.

 

“…Your Majesty is being too harsh. Levania must have been quite heartbroken.”

 

“That girl always wears the same expression.”

 

Maxim spoke with an indifferent attitude. Rather than Maxim, Hans would probably be more sensitive in reading Levania’s expressions. Maxim had never truly cared about Levania’s feelings. He only cared about whether his intentions would be accepted.

 

Hans could guess how Levania would have faced that situation. She would have had a noble, impassive face that wouldn’t even show a drop of blood when pricked with a needle.

 

“Three weeks will pass quickly. But still, I’m glad you came to see me.”

 

If it were him, his daughter being dragged into the palace as a concubine, he would have stayed by her side. After all, he could agree to the plan of handing over his biological daughter to his son in return for his support.

 

Thinking like this, Hans felt a bit sorry for Levania. He knew how Zelenka criticized Levania.

 

Maxim, being a duke, couldn’t do much, so he indulged Levania, who was relatively easy to deal with. Levania used to just submit when she was younger, but now she was used to it. So, she didn’t even realize she always wore such an expressionless face.

 

‘The emperor’s mood changes like flipping the palm of a hand… It’s frightening.’

 

The situation became favorable for Hans compared to when Levania entered as a concubine. If she became a concubine, Levania wouldn’t be able to inherit the position of the duke’s successor no matter what she did. If she had become the empress, Hans wouldn’t have been able to covet the Wendel ducal title for his second child. But now, things were different.

 

‘It’s a one-time deal….’

 

Anyway, there was no evidence anywhere that Albert was a commoner. So, if he could persuade Maxim again to restore Albert’s status…

 

“So you came to me because you had nowhere else to turn. You must be suffering more than anyone else… with no one to understand your feelings.”

 

“Hans. You’re the only one who understands my feelings, after all.”

 

Seeing Maxim embrace him as if he had been waiting, Hans smiled with a sense of repentance. Whether Levania, the highborn maid, died in the emperor’s hands or spent her whole life there, it was now irrelevant to him. With Levania gone, the Wendel ducal title was now within his grasp.

 

* * *

 

The attendant came in the middle of the night. It meant the emperor had summoned her. Levania was taken aback but hurried at the attendant’s urging. She quickly dressed in the clothes she had prepared just in case and washed her face lightly.

 

The attendant was surprised to see Levania come out without any makeup.

 

“…Are you going like this?”

 

“Will His Majesty be angry?”

 

When Levania asked, the attendant seemed to have no particular thoughts.

 

“I don’t know. It’s already been delayed for quite some time, so let’s go.”

 

For the attendant, Levania’s position was just Levania’s position. It was not his concern. Levania followed the attendant with her maids who were woken up late at night.

 

Walking through the darkness of the palace following the attendant holding a lantern in the middle of the night felt eerie. They passed through large and wide corridors and climbed several stairs.

 

‘It’s okay. This will be the first and last time.’

 

Most of the intimate scenes in the original work involved Kasion embracing Albert, but there was one scene where he embraced another male concubine. Kasion didn’t like unresponsive partners. Although Kasion was restrained, if Levania showed such a reaction, it would likely end with just one encounter.

 

‘Try not to make any noise… Just lie still until Kasion finishes.’

 

Then Kasion would quickly lose interest in Levania and leave. Kasion was depicted as being good at sex to the point where it was difficult for him to regain composure, so it wouldn’t be too terrible, Hans thought.

 

Amidst various resolutions, she could enter the main palace. Even more than the harem, the main palace had strict security.

 

However, even that was limited to the exterior. Once inside, the number of guards noticeably decreased. Kasion probably didn’t know he needed so many guards, given his setting as the strongest person in this world.

 

By the time she reached the emperor’s chambers after passing numerous stairs and corridors, her heart had sunk. Frankly, her enthusiasm for sex had also waned.

 

‘Why is it so far away!’

 

It felt irritatingly distant. Having just moved into this unfamiliar environment, she had barely managed to fall asleep in her tense state. Levania hurried her steps, showing signs of fatigue.

 

When they reached the massive door adorned with gold, the attendant stepped back and glanced at the guards. The guards nodded to Levania and opened the door.

 

“Please enter.”

 

Levania’s maids were also waiting outside the door. Perhaps they didn’t know whether they should continue doing so all night, during the emperor’s intimate session.

 

‘All night… No, it can’t be. How long could it be?’

 

Levania composed herself and stepped into the room.

 

* * *

 

A fire was burning in the fireplace of the living room. Inside the spacious room with carpets, eight of the emperor’s maids were bowing their heads towards Levania.

 

“Lady.”

 

“We will assist you in preparing for His Majesty’s visit. Please follow us as preparation is necessary.”

 

Ah… I forgot about this. Completely forgot the scene Albert had when he first entered the emperor’s chambers. Levania muttered curses under her breath and nodded her head. The maids approached Levania and began to explain.

 

“When you ascend to His Majesty’s bed, you must not wear anything except jewelry.”

 

“You must obey whatever His Majesty commands, and do not forget that the sounds should not seep out of the bedroom.”

 

As Levania listened to the maids’ words, her face flushed. The maids took her silence as affirmation and began to undress Levania.

 

Even during her stay at the Duke’s mansion, she had been attended by maids and servants. So, although she had exposed herself in front of such people before, it felt embarrassing to do so before entering the emperor’s bedchamber.

 

Despite Levania’s hesitation, the maids continued to undress her without a second thought. Then, they adorned her with bracelets on her right wrist and left ankle, each with a single bell attached.

 

They applied perfume to her loose brown hair, giving it a glossy shine, and sprinkled gold dust on it. They hung a necklace made of gold and rubies around her neck and fastened a waistband made of gold chains around her waist. Seeing this, Levania thought it was more obscene than being completely naked.

 

Her preparation was completed with a hair ornament depicting flowers with emeralds. The maids bowed to Levania and said,

 

“Please wait in the room; His Majesty will enter.”

 

‘Does that mean he hasn’t entered the room yet?’

 

It was around 1 a.m. when Levania left her bedroom. Considering the time it took to get here and finish her preparations, it must have been around 2 a.m. now.

 

‘What could they be doing at this hour? Are they really that busy?’

 

She thought they had deliberately called her late at night, but it seemed that wasn’t the case. Lost in her thoughts, the maids opened the door to the emperor’s bedroom. Levania glanced at the maids and entered the room. Once Levania disappeared into the bedroom, the maids closed the door again.

 

Now it was time to wait for the emperor to arrive.

 

* * *

 

The gold chain hanging from the waistband was uncomfortable as it descended between her buttocks while lying or sitting. Levania grumbled irritably as she glanced back at it.

 

‘Well, to each their own..’

 

Indeed, even the title of this novel suggested what would unfold in the future.

 

‘An Emperor’s Lewd Prison’ – what’s that about?

 

Although she enjoyed it in her past life… in reality, she had read it with the expectation of certain scenes. While she did wish to live even through a novel reincarnation, it was more about becoming a character in a typical romance novel, not a sleazy BL one.

 

‘Perhaps he harbors ill feelings towards me for rejecting the position of empress. However, I must endure tonight by any means necessary… and then, we must escape from here.’

 

The emperor’s concubines were allowed to go out after a month of entering the palace. Until recently, she had feared it would be difficult to go out until the carriage arrived. But now, with regular outings permitted, she thought she could escape easily.

 

Levania glanced at the clock on the bedside table to calm her mind. The clock placed in front of the fireplace already indicated 3 a.m.

 

‘At least I managed to get a little sleep…’

 

Since there was nothing to do until the emperor’s visit, Levania went to bed early. Since the maids had already tidied everything up, she only needed to check if everything was in place. Yet, even though it was midnight, she yawned while waiting, and then she heard footsteps outside the door.

 

“Your Majesty, have you arrived?”

 

“The lady is waiting inside.”

 

Levania looked around the door in confusion. Every time she moved, the bells on her hands and ankles rang.

 

‘Is this finally it?’

 

Until now, she hadn’t made any preparations. Although Levania was born and lived until today, she had never seen Kasion. Neither Maxime nor Zelenka cared enough to take their daughter to the royal banquet. Moreover, when Levania was growing up, there was a rebellion.

 

It was the doing of Kyleon, the younger brother of the former emperor. Kyleon did hold banquets, but he made Kasion, his nephew, a slave for public amusement.

 

Maxime felt fear from his actions and didn’t attend the royal banquet. Around that time, Zelenka had another lover and was traveling abroad.

 

When Kasion ascended to the throne after two years of slavery, there were assassins in the palace. Assassination attempts never ceased at every banquet. The number of recorded rebellions in history exceeded two digits… It was natural for Kasion to avoid holding banquets.

 

Since that period lasted for six years, royal banquets and balls had almost disappeared. Kasion, who had spent his childhood in blood and swords, wasn’t particularly interested in balls. Occasionally, he would hold banquets with his ministers and officials.

 

Naturally, the debutante balls disappeared as well. Levania had never held a debutante ball. She only attended banquets and balls hosted by nobles. Since she had never attended any events at the palace, seeing Kasion was a first for her. It was quite embarrassing to appear before a man she would see for the first time in such a peculiar manner.

 

Although Levania didn’t brighten up at the sound, she could tell that the emperor was passing by the maids and walking towards the bedroom.

 

‘I, I can’t receive him like this…’

 

However, there was nowhere to hide her body. Panicking, Levania hurriedly climbed onto the bed. She quickly pulled the blanket over her head.

 

Thunk.

 

That was when the bedroom door opened.

 

“Gasp!”

 

She woke up belatedly, but it was already too late. She was wrapped in the blanket like a child. Levania held her breath under the covers.

 

Thud. Thud…

 

The emperor, who had closed the door of the bedroom, was walking towards the bed. Levania trembled nervously, crouching under the blanket. What have I done? I couldn’t bear the embarrassment. I should have run away from here before something like this happened.

 

Before the emperor proposed to the Duke’s daughter, I should have run away, thinking about causing less harm to those who would stay at the Duke’s. Yet, I did this.

 

“…”

 

It seemed like the footsteps stopped in front of the bed. As Levania held her breath, the blanket covering her head slipped down.

 

“Aah?!”

 

As soon as her upper body was exposed outside the blanket, her eyes met Kasion’s. Meeting his bright golden hair and razor-sharp azure eyes, Levania froze. The only relief was that the blanket hadn’t been completely taken away.

 

‘This person is the emperor…’

 

Levania was about to be mesmerized by Kasion’s appearance, but she snapped out of it. Her opponent was a tyrant. If she let her guard down, it would be insufficient even if she had ten necks.

 

‘Don’t stare at him! Pull yourself together, Levania!’

 

Was he truly the official male protagonist of this world…? If she kept staring blankly, she felt like she would be enchanted.

 

* * *

 

Levania had never seen Kasion, but Kasion knew Levania’s face. He had seen her portrait.

 

He knew that most of the high nobles despised her, that some dared to mock her, not even treating her as royalty, as the Emperor’s soon-to-be bedroom slave.

 

Kasion had exterminated them one by one. It was akin to hunting. Those who dared to insult her by calling her a concubine were made into concubines themselves.

 

Kailon had waited for Kasion to grow up, always threatening him with that. Kasion had to pretend to be submissive, feigning fear. He had sworn to engrave that humiliation into his bones and repay his enemies.

 

So, many of the high-ranking nobles were dying off. Now that the imperial authority had stabilized and it was time to revive the authority and traditions of the imperial family. For this, it was necessary to marry a noblewoman from within the empire, not a princess from another country.

 

Naturally, Levania, the daughter of the Duke, was the only candidate left.

 

However, Levania refused to become the empress. Even though she had lowered herself to become a concubine, Kasion, whose judgment was twisted, thought differently.

 

He thought she was refusing to become his wife because she had seen him as a fetus in the womb.

 

So, he canceled the scheduled wedding and willingly made her a concubine. Regardless of what his subjects said or how politically difficult it might be, he didn’t care about welcoming those who humiliated him as his empress.

 

Tonight, he intended to make her feel how insignificant her position as a concubine was. But…

 

‘What is she doing?’

 

He thought as he looked at Levania hiding in the bed. The lump of blanket seemed to be crouching. Could she be cowering out of fear?

 

Even if she wasn’t a transcendent being, he had made her wear jewelry with bells attached. So, there was no way she could hide silently.

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