You are at the End of the Downfall

Spring in the North (9)

Beatrice was desperately searching for information about ‘Insenidraken’, a merchant group that still no one knew about.

She couldn’t let go of that arrogant bastard who had impudently seen her only as a noble’s daughter ready to be sold off.

That merchant group had taken over all of Monde Duchy’s debts anyway. She had to resolve this somehow. She thought her anger might subside a bit if she could capture that guy, make him kneel, and humiliate him in every possible way.

His frivolous and unruly attitude still provoked Beatrice. Yes, he was somewhat attractive. Appetizing, you could say. She wanted to taste him once.

Of course, since his appearance was too ordinary, she would probably play with him once or twice and then discard him, but still, people with that kind of aura were rare.

However, Beatrice’s current top-ranked man was definitely Peon. Men who were breathtakingly handsome and possessed a dangerous, precarious aura were rare. No, nonexistent.

“Ah, Mom, wake up!”

In that sense, she had been incredibly irritated for several days. Nothing was going right. Although she had placed a taboo on Peon, he kept slipping through her fingers since his marriage.

Her mother had become a complete drunk while she wasn’t looking, the Emperor was only focused on the Empress, and some arrogant merchant or whatever he was, whose identity was unknown, was trying to dig up secrets that no one had cared about for 10 years.

She couldn’t even touch the prophecy she had glimpsed from the stolen poison from Kaela in Lusenford. It was frustrating.

“The Crown Prince is getting engaged! We need to get dresses fitted quickly!”

After waking up the Duchess of Monde, who had been sleeping until midday after drinking heavily the night before, Beatrice immediately focused on getting a new battle dress fitted.

She couldn’t show her father, Duke Monde, to the merchant group that held their debt, though she had agreed to marriage.

Anyway, if she got her dress fitted and helped her mother make a comeback through the Crown Prince’s engagement ceremony, it would look convincing. She would execute the prophecy right after that.

“Mom, no one knows that Dad is dead, right?”

“Why are you talking nonsense in the morning…?”

“It’s not morning, it’s past noon. But no one knows, right?”

“What do you mean no one knows? Some people do.”

“Who?”

Beatrice’s eyes immediately darted around. The debtor wanted to meet Duke Monde. If that was the case, she needed to first silence those who knew that Duke Monde had actually been dead for a long time.

“You!”

The Duchess of Monde said to her daughter as if it were obvious.

“I know too. But why are you asking?”

“I met with the new creditor, and he keeps insisting on seeing Dad.”

The Duchess of Monde sat at her vanity, rubbing her face, then turned to look at her daughter.

“Why?”

Her mother’s unmade face suddenly looked aged. Beatrice strode over, took out new facial toner and said,

“Because the debt is in Dad’s name.”

“Oh please… How long has it been since the world forgot about your father?”

“That’s why I’m uneasy about this. Does anyone else know besides us?”

“The doctor… the butler, and John know.”

Her dried, cracked fingers counted them off. Beatrice’s eyes narrowed. So three more people knew.

“Don’t worry. They’re all trustworthy people. Besides, how long ago was that? It’s been 10 years, 10 years.”

“Still, you never know…”

“Ten years is longer than you think. It takes just a moment for someone to become nobody. Everyone forgets. Sometimes I even forget that I had a husband.”

“It’s still suspicious.”

“People can’t beat time. If it’s been quiet for 10 years, it’ll stay quiet. Besides, what if it comes out that your father is dead? He was known for being sickly, so people will just think he died from illness.”

“Ah, Mom. I told you I don’t want to inherit the title.”

The Duchess of Monde turned to look at her daughter.

“Then you’ll have to settle for a decent marriage, won’t you? Marriage is a shield for women. You can easily find a rich, sufficiently stupid man who won’t even notice if you have affairs.”

“Would you be satisfied with such a man?”

“That’s how a husband should be. If he’s not satisfying, you can find relief with other men. Ah, my head hurts. Why do you keep asking unnecessary questions? You’re giving me a headache. Go away.”

The Duchess waved her hand in irritation.

“I’m running around everywhere dealing with our debt crisis, while you just drink. Why are you the one getting annoyed?”

“You’re only talking about things that give me a headache. Why do you keep bringing up old stories for no reason! I’m already upset enough about not being able to go to the royal palace.”

“The ban has been lifted. You can go to the engagement ceremony, so what are you worried about?”

Beatrice snapped and stormed out, slamming the door. She just couldn’t communicate with her mother. If only she’d drink less.

‘Fine. Let’s say Dad’s dead and that’s that. Peon will probably come to the engagement ceremony too. His Majesty will be pleased when I show him how many taboos I’ve placed. Though that creditor is concerning…’

For now, she had mobilized all her informants to investigate that merchant group, so something should turn up. Since it was a merchant group, killing one man wouldn’t solve the problem.

Since he was just another man, it could be handled easily enough. Men were predictable after all. Beatrice knew sorcery and was skilled at lying and making excuses. She could buy time by making excuses about still looking for a husband.

‘After that, I just need to execute the prophecy I saw in Lusenford.’

In the basin stained with blood and poison, Beatrice had seen a very sweet outcome. Once she obtained that, debts would mean nothing.

Everything had always worked in Beatrice’s favor. If it wasn’t favorable, she made it so. She had lived her life managing even enormous debts so well that they hardly felt like debts. This time would be no different. Definitely.

****

It’s proper to return as much as you receive. Since his father-in-law had sent more goods than ordered, the son-in-law also needed to reciprocate.

Seeing the size of the merchant ships from Ostein, the people of Lusenford seemed to feel they couldn’t be outdone.

Quality leather, refined iron, and sturdy timber concealing gold were quietly loaded onto the ship. It was also filled with swords, spears, and shields made in Lusenford, known for its weapon craftsmanship.

“We’d also like to request harpoons and pulleys.”

The Ostein knights admired the sophisticated weapons and ordered weapons for use on their ships. Lusenford, rich in underground resources including iron, would prosper much more if they cooperated with Ostein.

“As we’re currently expanding our construction, we have many requests as well.”

The Ostein people weren’t planning to stay long. Merchants always come and go like the wind.

Moreover, with news of the Crown Prince’s engagement ceremony, the Ostein people were very busy. But they needed to perfectly conclude their business in Lusenford.

This wasn’t just any place – it was somewhere they would continue to trade with, and a place that would be ruled by Ostein’s future heir.

Yes. Marriage ultimately meant connecting two domains, becoming one body.

Everyone knew this – Regen who was continuously making lists and checking if they could match order quantities, and Johnny who was calculating when they would return here again.

Kaela was guessing that must be her usefulness. For instance, her utility had only increased because of this incident.

‘Since Father is still alive, that’s advantageous…’

“Stop.”

Peon tapped on Kaela’s desk. His well-shaped, thick, and elegantly long fingers drew attention.

“Stop thinking.”

Kaela looked at him puzzled.

“Do you know what I’m thinking?”

“I don’t know exactly what, but it’s not good thoughts. I can tell by your expression, so stop thinking alone and tell me.”

She was about to ask how he knew, but having already heard the answer, she stared bewilderedly at his outstretched hand.

“Take it.”

“If I don’t…”

“I’ll hug you.”

She tried anyway, though she knew this would happen. Kaela took his hand and stood up.

He either brought food or made sure she walked regularly. Usually both. Today too, Peon planned to take a walk around the area with her, carrying a package of food specially prepared by the chef.

“Stop thinking. It’s not a problem you can solve just by thinking about it anyway.”

How does he know that too? Kaela looked at him.

“If it was something that could be concluded, you would have reached it already.”

While the harbor was bustling with Ostein people’s arrival and Lusenford people were busy sightseeing and trying to sell more, the Grand Duke alone remained relaxed.

“Wouldn’t it be better to tell me if it’s something you can’t figure out alone?”

True, Peon was the only one who could answer. Instead of responding, Kaela looked around. Though there were many people, no one paid much attention to the two of them. It was perfect for asking dangerous questions.

“Can I ask you something?”

Peon smiled slightly.

“Just ask. Nothing’s off limits.”

“How long do you plan to keep me alive?”

Instantly, their surroundings were isolated. People walked through the hall as if the Grand Duke and his wife weren’t there, completely unaware. Kaela hesitated, lowering her head before his purple eyes that had fixed on her and had grown large.

“I wanted to know when I would die…”

Now she was useful for trade with Ostein and other things, so he was keeping her alive, but once that usefulness ended, there would be no reason to keep her alive.

“Kaela. I told you clearly.”

Don’t you remember?

“You’re going to live with me until you die naturally from old age. And that’s after a very long time.”

Again. Again his black pupils were elongating vertically.

“Nothing else will be newly recorded as your cause of death.”

Even hearing the answer didn’t bring clarity or relief. Rather, it only added to her questions. Why?

“…You dislike me.”

Peon’s breath caught. Though he knew he shouldn’t dare say it, his breathing stopped and dizziness struck. What other obvious reason could there be for forcibly keeping alive a woman who constantly tried to die, making her eat, bathe, dress, and walk?

The man who couldn’t dare speak could only barely endure everything while watching the woman who only said things opposite to the real reason.

He had to endure what felt like losing his mind by holding onto it, and manage his difficult breathing on his own. In front of Kaela, he had no right to show his struggle.

“I don’t dislike you…”

“Then you should have killed me at once.”

Though too afraid to meet his eyes, Kaela blurted out. She twisted her trembling hand out of his grasp. The doubts that had built up from constantly worrying alone finally leaked out.

“That’s how… that’s how you killed them.”

Peon must have really hated Kaela. He must have despised and loathed her. That’s why he definitely starved her to death. He had thrown her, a precious imperial princess, down to rock bottom miserably.

It was the most terrible and painful punishment a noblewoman could experience. Hope was stripped away, and suffering from headaches that felt like her head would split open, she could only pray for death to come quickly. Over several days, she came to realize how much Peon had hated her.

“So, if you hate me that much…”

“I don’t hate you.”

He was about to ask why she would ask such an obvious question. But Peon’s face was completely distorted, and it wasn’t a question but a certainty. His severely cracked voice was tearing into himself.

“It’s… it’s because I was incompetent. Such an order, to kill you like that…”

The words were like knives, seeming to slash at his throat. It hurt so much that words wouldn’t come out properly.

The husband who should have come to check was shamelessly eating meals and preparing for war, not even knowing that the orders hadn’t been properly delivered.

Kaela must have looked for him, must have waited. In the end, she died lonely and painfully with her child, believing only that he hated her so much.

“I never gave such an order. I’m sorry for being incompetent. I’m truly, sincerely sorry. But I really never gave such an order.”

Peon’s knees were already bent. Whether he had ordered it or not, it was all his sin. Being incompetent was also a sin. So all he could do was apologize. He should willingly kneel and bow down anywhere.

“It may sound like an excuse, but it’s all my fault. I couldn’t even see properly, couldn’t protect you.”

How painful and frightening it must have been. It was a wound that would never heal.

The wounds inflicted on the soul would remain deep, causing pain at any time. Peon had caused such wounds. He prayed that this pain he felt now was far greater than the pain she had felt.

“I’ll do whatever you want. I can do anything for you, so this time, please…”

Before Kaela, who had stubbornly turned her head away, could say anything, he asked.

“Please, won’t you just stay alive?”

He begged and pleaded with his severely cracked voice.

“I cannot hold on for long.”

He intercepted before she could ask to be killed. So she had no choice but to say something else.

“I don’t have the strength for that. So, whatever you’re planning…”

“There’s nothing like that. How could someone like me have any plans? There’s nothing like that.”

He desperately grabbed her hand that had slipped away.

“I’m only living because you told me to live, Kaela.”

Kaela unconsciously turned to look at Peon and flinched. There was that empty and dry look she faced every time she looked in the mirror. There was that longing to just die and end it all.

He didn’t particularly want to live either. Especially after breaking free from the taboo. He had no attachments, no will to live, and had committed too great a sin.

He was merely enduring, paying for his sins while regretting again and again the irreversible things he had done.

As a sinner, he dared not choose death. Only because Kaela, and no one else, had ordered him not to die, he would obey.

“Everything I have is yours.”

His life, his secrets, everything was given to her. He gave her everything to wield and play with. Only what he couldn’t give, no, what he dared not offer because it was too filthy, was his heart. If he offered this dirty thing, would she use it as a weapon?

“You don’t need to fear someone like me. I’m not worth it.”

So he didn’t even hope for forgiveness. Always just apologizing.

“If living is hard, I’ll make it not hard. I’ll do the enduring. I promised to make your life enjoyable, didn’t I?”

He would rather welcome it if she sought revenge. After all, revenge is also a good driving force for extending life. But this was Kaela, who didn’t speak a word of resentment even after all this.

“So, please.”

You must live.

Although he knew this too was a shameless request, she still had to live the life she couldn’t live before. He had to support her and live on like this. This time, he would make sure of it.

Until that fearful woman overcame her fears and shouted out her hatred and loathing for him, until she harbored the hatred, stubbornness, courage, and anger she rightfully should have, he would have to endure and endure again…

“Kaela.”

Those empty eyes were wandering, searching only for death, not him.

Those eyes might never be filled again.

No, they already weren’t.

 

Comment

  1. fatinotfound says:

    😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔

  2. fatinotfound says:

    thanks for the Chapter!!

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