Moreover, it wasn’t just the clerks. Due to the guard forces they brought, the already strict security at the gate had become even more severe.
“If not now…!”
If not now, the castle gates would soon close. And when the ducal townhouse realizes the princess is missing, there will be chaos. If not now, there would be no chance.
Kaela pushed away his arm and ran forward. But Peon gritted his teeth and blocked her. The administrative officer is the Emperor’s right hand. If caught here, it’s over. The Emperor would be furious.
“Kaela, please!”
“Please, Your Highness. Please, please let me go.”
In the shadow of a dark, smelly alley, the two struggled physically. Kaela thrashed and hit him, but Peon held her tightly and wouldn’t let go.
“Not now. Please. If you go now, the Ostein ducal family will be finished by tomorrow morning.”
It would literally be the end. He whispered lowly while restraining the struggling Kaela. She looked at the administrative officer, then at the gate commander talking with him.
A young knight was nodding at the administrative officer’s words. Wasn’t that Sir Isidore Dakiten, the gate commander? Moreover, he was Peon’s cousin. Nothing good would come from encountering that man here.
“I can go, there’s a way…!”
But that way was something Peon shouldn’t know, something only she should know, so Kaela couldn’t say more. If she mentioned Brother Isidore in front of Peon, Sir Isidore Dakiten, the gate commander, would also be implicated.
Above all, she couldn’t overcome Peon’s strong grip. A familiar scene was unfolding again.
Everything close, is taken away, and disappears right before her eyes. Frustration and despair came easily, and her efforts hadn’t fulfilled her wishes for a long time.
There was no reason for the administrative officer and clerks, the Emperor’s eyes and ears, to come to the gate at this hour. But they had, so her escape was over. It was always like this.
The light in Kaela’s eyes gradually faded. She had planned to escape through her long-standing connection with Sir Dakiten, but the Emperor’s direct administrative officer outranked the gate commander Dakiten. It was over. It had always been like this. Her life had always been like this.
The strength drained from her hands that had been pushing him away violently. Peon felt the temperature rising in the body he held tightly. She was developing a fever.
“I’ll, I’ll let you leave later. I promise.”
Such words are useless. He knew. They probably wouldn’t even reach her ears. But Peon pleaded while hiding her in the shadow of the dirty alley, shielding her from the Emperor’s eyes.
“You’ll be free. You’ll become someone with no connection to Lusenford, so please, I beg you, just endure a little longer.”
Even as he spoke, Peon felt a throbbing pain in his heart. Yes. Kaela had to be someone with no connection to him. As she lost strength and fell lower and lower, he forcibly held her up and gritted his teeth.
****
“Right now, His Majesty the Emperor has staked his honor on our marriage, princess.”
As Peon barely managed to resolve the situation and return, Kaela didn’t cry. She just sank deep into silence in the carriage.
Peon, who had experienced countless battlefields, couldn’t hide his unease, feeling that her attitude was like that of someone facing death.
He wanted to make the marriage as if it had never happened. He truly wished for it desperately. But having regressed only a few days ago, he didn’t have enough power yet.
It was even more impossible now that the Emperor was trying to prove “proper leadership of the royal family” through their marriage.
Kaela, who had worn a veil with a pale face before the regression, must have hated this just as much. It would be the same then and now.
What a humiliating marriage for the noble Princess of Ostein. He was also very distressed to find himself in the role of rambling on about the current reality in front of her.
“If this marriage doesn’t happen, it will damage His Majesty’s honor, and it’s too obvious where that anger will be directed.”
Was she even listening? Kaela, dazzlingly beautiful even in her pitiful state, seemed uninterested in his words. Her ears were closed and the light in her eyes had gone out.
“For now, you must live, Princess Kaela.”
He never, ever wanted to see her die with her eyes open again.
“If you live, you can divorce me, inherit the Ostein duchy, and maybe someday you’ll think you did well to live.”
His heart burned and his blood ran cold as he spoke. He was begging her not to die.
“Can’t you give me just 3 years?”
It was actually a very tight timeframe, but Peon dared to promise.
“I’ll divorce you after 3 years. I absolutely won’t covet Ostein. I’ll put all this in writing and sign it. Just 3 years. After that…”
After that, he would have to completely cut himself out of Kaela’s life, but he wouldn’t be able to cut Kaela out of his own life. His breath caught in his throat.
“After that, go south.”
Peon lowered his gaze. He didn’t have the face to look at her directly while saying these words, being a shameless person who was hurting even as he spoke them.
“Return to the south.”
But Kaela wasn’t listening to his words.
‘I… I’m really stupid and can’t do anything properly.’
Foolish and stupid, everything I do is clumsy.
Why don’t you just stay still, why do you have to come forward and give everyone a headache?
No matter how hard Kaela tried, she couldn’t even keep up with the toes of ordinary people.
You just cause trouble and we have to clean it up. Even your speech is strange.
What can you do, being half-mad and unable to even properly play the role of Grand Duchess?
If you don’t know anything, staying still is how you can help, Your Highness.
Everything she did was like that. How could a stupid fool succeed just by trying to break out once? She couldn’t even die properly without others helping her.
Bring in the rain. (TL: It’s a figurative expression that means to bring something bad or negative upon oneself. It’s similar to the English idiom “bring the rain on oneself” or “invite trouble.”)
Because she’s a fool who can’t do anything, because she can’t even speak properly, she should just stay still. This time too, she should just die quietly.
Even if she came back, there was no way she could accomplish anything. What could she do, having worked without proper sleep for 4 years before dying, yet never receiving recognition? She should just sit still and die obediently.
At some point, Kaela slightly raised the corners of her mouth.
‘What could I possibly do.’
Unable to distinguish whether this was reality or madness.
Peon’s eyes trembled painfully as he watched Kaela wandering in the darkness with an unhinged smile. She wasn’t listening to his words.
The carriage quietly returned to the Ostein ducal townhouse.
:(( poor Kaela