When the Stars Tremble

The Thirty-Seventh Star

Jiang Chuyi sent half a screen of ellipses in response.

Chen Yi: [From the thousand-word essay you sent me, I can indeed feel your distress. So, I’ve decided to seriously answer your question and give you my opinion.]

Chen Yi: [Zong Ye proposing this method to you clearly shows that he’s letting you casually ride on his popularity. As a top star at the height of his fame, he definitely wouldn’t sacrifice himself to this extent for a variety show. If Zong Ye didn’t want to, do you think the production team would have the power to make him?]

Chen Yi: [Moreover, the fact that you actually believed his nonsense shows that you’re also quite deeply infatuated. It’s not that you don’t understand, it’s that you don’t want to let yourself understand, right?]

Chen Yi: [In my opinion, there are two possibilities for why he’s not being direct with you now. 1. He doesn’t like you enough and just wants to play around, while expanding the business of the CP circle (he obviously doesn’t need this). The risk and reward are clearly not proportional. 2. He likes you too much, to the point that he can’t control himself, so he ‘goes crazy’ on the show. But he’s not sure about your attitude, so he’s still waiting.]

Chen Yi: [However, you know Zong Ye’s provocative style. If his relationship is exposed now, it won’t just be a house collapse, it will be a full-scale entertainment industry earthquake and tsunami from top to bottom. I’ll give you a piece of sincere advice. If you want to have a future with him, it’s best to keep a low profile now. If you want to be BloodXGentle’s sister-in-law, the most important thing is to endure and not react, lie low and take the ridicule. Don’t provoke his fans.]

Chen Yi wrote a lot, but Jiang Chuyi never responded.

Countless fragments flashed through her mind, and she thought of many things related to Zong Ye. His very beautiful eyes, his gentle and helpless smile, the “happy birthday” on the Italian street, the half cigarette in the snowy night, the warm little home in the old alley…

For more than a decade, Jiang Chuyi had acted in many dramas and pretended to deeply love many people. Qin Tong once said that her understanding of love wasn’t deep enough, and the fragments she performed lacked soul. She never understood.

Qin Tong asked her, “What is the first thing love brings to a person?”

Jiang Chuyi answered, “Courage.”

Qin Tong shook his head.

She thought, if she were to answer Teacher Qin’s question now, Jiang Chuyi would say:

Vulnerability.

Only in the face of Zong Ye was she indecisive. Only in the face of him could she not persist in being herself.

Jiang Chuyi: [Little Yi, I regret it. I should have thought it through from the beginning. But now it’s too late, the show has already recorded two episodes.]

Chen Yi: [?????]

Jiang Chuyi: [I’m not as greedy as you think. I know I can’t reach for Zong Ye.]

Chen Yi: [What reaching or not reaching, although it’s a sin for idols to date, aren’t they about to finish their contracts?]

Jiang Chuyi: [Whether the contract is finished or not, Zong Ye is still a top star. What I thought before was to cooperate with the production team’s hype. If Zong Ye wanted to, I’d be willing to play dumb and ‘fool around’ with him. Then when the show finished airing, I’d come out and clarify things for him. But now things have deviated more and more from what I expected. Perhaps, it’s a good thing that I never dared to ask him.]

After typing this paragraph, Jiang Chuyi put down her phone and leaned her head against the back of the chair. Her heart was beating, the palpitations mixed with pain. She quietly experienced this feeling.

Lost in thought for a long time, Jiang Chuyi looked towards Zong Ye.

He was only separated from her by a narrow aisle, sitting in the front row, in the outer seat. She didn’t know what Wang Tan said, but he was chuckling lightly.

Jiang Chuyi quietly raised her left hand and traced the outline of his shadow with her finger.

From this angle, it seemed that if she just went up a little bit, she would touch Zong Ye.

Jiang Chuyi knew she didn’t just want to accompany him in playing this game of “pretending to date”. She was deceiving herself.

She wanted him, wanted him very much.

But she couldn’t ruin Zong Ye.

Until she put her hand down, Jiang Chuyi picked up her phone again and sent Chen Yi a message.

[Thank you for your wisdom. I will handle this matter well.]

*

For tonight’s recording, the production team specially rented a standalone party villa.

Entering the courtyard, the coordinator told them, “There are several rooms on the third floor for you to rehearse. Guitars, pianos, and microphones are all prepared.”

Jiang Chuyi quietly asked Zong Ye, “Can you teach me to play the guitar?”

He lowered his head slightly, “You want to learn this?”

Jiang Chuyi nodded.

“Okay,” he agreed.

As the two were talking, Fu Cheng walked over, glanced indifferently at Jiang Chuyi, and handed the phone to Zong Ye, “Someone is looking for you.”

Zong Ye took the phone and discussed with Jiang Chuyi, “You go wait for me in the room first?”

“Okay.”

Seeing her go up, Zong Ye casually turned off the mic on his collar and walked to a quiet place before answering the phone.

Fu Cheng crossed his arms and leaned to the side, waiting for the call to end before asking, “What did my uncle say?”

Zong Ye handed the phone back to him, “The company’s location has been selected. We need to take some time in the next two days to go to the site and register for the business license.”

“Oh.” Fu Cheng’s expression didn’t change much. He said indifferently, “In the future, you and my uncle will handle the company’s affairs.”

“Why?”

“Don’t you know more people than I do? I’m too lazy to deal with that group of people. Don’t bother me.”

Zong Ye laughed, “Can you leave me some time? I still want to accompany my girlfriend.”

“Where do you have a girlfriend?” Fu Cheng’s tone was skeptical.

“I don’t have one yet,” Zong Ye sighed, “I’m still working hard. It feels like there’s hope.”

Fu Cheng was stunned for a moment, then realized, “Don’t tell me you mean Jiang Chuyi?”

“You figured it out too?”

Fu Cheng: “…”

The corner of his mouth twitched a few times, “No wonder Wang Tan told me you have a love-obsessed brain and told me to stay away from you.”

Zong Ye found it amusing, “He said that about me?”

“So when you told us before that you might retreat behind the scenes after finishing the contract, it was for Jiang Chuyi?”

Zong Ye neither confirmed nor denied it.

Fu Cheng could no longer maintain his cold expression, “Did Jiang Chuyi save your life? Can you not be so scary?”

Zong Ye started laughing, “Am I scary?”

He thought carefully for a moment and sighed, admitting, “I do seem a bit scary, so I’m still trying to restrain myself.”

Fu Cheng frowned, “It’s not so easy for you to retreat now even if you want to. We were both brought out by Sister Yin. When we end our contracts, she said her depression will act up. If she knows you plan to retreat behind the scenes, she’ll hang herself at IM’s door.”

“I know. I might not necessarily retreat. Anyway, I won’t continue on the idol path. I’ll take it slow.” Zong Ye patted his shoulder and instructed, “I’m going up first. Oh right, remember not to tell Xin He for now.”

Fu Cheng was completely convinced, “You’re really scheming. You even considered Xin He. No wonder my uncle said you’re a talent. Who else is like you? You could write a Sun Tzu’s Art of War just for pursuing someone.”

Zong Ye pretended not to hear the sarcasm in his tone and still responded with good temper, “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Fu Cheng continued to sneer, “Jiang Chuyi is a bit pitiful. When she learns of your true colors, it’ll be too late to regret.”

Zong Ye was silent for a moment and asked strangely, “Are you asking for my help?”

“Asking for help with what?”

“For me to teach you how to pursue Xin He?”

Fu Cheng was speechless.

Zong Ye patted his shoulder again and left on his own.

……

……

Zong Ye entered the room. Jiang Chuyi was already holding a guitar, trying to tune it with a slightly clumsy posture. She would play a few notes and then pause, seeking help from her PD.

Feng Jia smiled and glanced at Zong Ye, “The professional is here. I won’t teach you anymore. If you have any questions, ask him.”

Zong Ye walked over, pulled up a chair, and sat down next to her.

Feng Jia glanced at her watch, “I won’t disturb you two for now. I have to go to a meeting with the writing team. The cameras in the room are already on, so you can start rehearsing.”

Jiang Chuyi: “Okay.”

After Feng Jia left, Zong Ye asked Jiang Chuyi, “Why did you suddenly want to play the guitar? Have you learned it before?”

Jiang Chuyi: “I learned a little before when I was filming.”

She said embarrassedly, “I don’t have much talent in the arts, so I quite envy people who can play the piano and guitar. I think it’s pretty cool.”

Zong Ye laughed, “Is this a compliment for me?”

Jiang Chuyi didn’t respond.

Seeing him rub his eyes, Jiang Chuyi put down the guitar in her hands, ran to rummage through her bag, and after a while, found a new bottle of eye drops.

She walked back and handed it to Zong Ye, “I wanted to give this to you last time but forgot. This can be used directly even when wearing contact lenses.”

Zong Ye was stunned for a moment before taking it, “Thank you.”

“Haven’t you been resting well? Your eyes are overused. I’ve noticed you’ve been rubbing your eyes a lot recently.” There was a hint of concern in her tone.

“I had nearsightedness surgery before,” Zong Ye tilted his head back, pinching the bottle with two fingers and squeezing a few drops into his eyes. He blinked away the moisture, “Maybe I’ve been wearing contact lenses for too long recently. It’s nothing.”

Zong Ye said, “What song do you want to play? I’ll teach you.”

Jiang Chuyi thought for a moment and lowered her eyes, “Can you teach me <<Creep>>, the one you played during my audition before? I think it sounds quite good. Then you can sing it at night and I’ll accompany you.”

Zong Ye looked at her thoughtfully. After a while, he said, “Okay.”

Jiang Chuyi took off her hair tie and tied up her black hair. She had just soaked in the pool, and her fingertips were still a bit pale. Her makeup was light. As she lowered her head slightly, a few strands of hair slipped down beside her ears, illuminated by the afternoon sunlight, making her side profile look very gentle.

Zong Ye’s mouth curved into a smile as he went to adjust her strumming posture.

……

……

As the rehearsal was almost complete, the production team registered each person’s performance and drew lots. The staff ordered box lunches for them. A few guests wolfed them down and started doing hair and makeup.

Chi Mengyue brought her own dress.

When Feng Miaotong saw it, her eyes went straight. She was speechless for a long time and complained in the WeChat group with her girlfriends:

[Chi Mengyue… I really respect her. Coming to participate in a reality show and still wearing haute couture… She even brought her own makeup team. She’s really a ‘fairy’.]

Repeatedly checking her smokey eye makeup with a small mirror, Feng Miaotong let out a long sigh. When the show airs, it would be another day of being outshone. She just prayed that her look wouldn’t be submitted to the entertainment industry’s ugly people bot.

Compared to the female guests, the male guests were much more casual. Zong Ye wore a white shirt with the sleeves rolled up and simple straight-leg jeans. Paired with his handsome face, he looked fresh and clean.

He sat with Jiang Chuyi, occasionally leaning over to whisper in her ear.

Feng Miaotong observed them with complex emotions, recalling various moments during the recording, and vaguely developed a certain guess.

Just as she was lost in thought, the first performance began.

Ji Kai and Zhao Guangyu were to sing a song medley of “Personal Introduction” + “In My Song (Remix)”.

The two looked at each other. Zhao Guangyu tilted his head, “Hey, bro, let’s go?”

As the music started, Zhao Guangyu grabbed the microphone, lowered his body, and squatted at the edge of the stage in a slouchy manner, “You should know, someone as handsome as me only appears in anime.”

As soon as the first line came out, it drew cheers from the audience. Jiang Chuyi smiled and clapped along with the others.

“In front of the crowd, I’m used to speaking in a low octave,” Ji Kai’s voice carried an arrogant wildness, “They say I only know how to say ‘damn cool’.”

Xu Jiayu whistled.

Jiang Chuyi considerately picked up her phone to record Zhao Guangyu’s highlight moment. After filming a two-minute video, she noticed that the person beside her had been staring at her.

Jiang Chuyi turned her head, “What’s wrong?”

Zong Ye: “Filming Zhao Guangyu?”

“Mm.”

Seeing the bland expression on his face, Jiang Chuyi suddenly remembered their conversation in the afternoon.

She gripped her phone guiltily.

Zong Ye seemed to want to say something. He moved his lips, “Never mind, it’s nothing.”

……

……

Their performance was the last one.

Jiang Chuyi rarely had the experience of performing on stage. Holding the guitar and looking at the sea of people below, her palms couldn’t help but sweat.

While testing the sound system, Zong Ye smiled and whispered to her, “Don’t be nervous.”

Jiang Chuyi forced a smile, “I’ll try my best.”

They both sat on high stools. Zong Ye had one leg bent, supporting himself with one foot on the ground. He held the microphone, lowered his head, and quietly waited for the music to start.

The lights on the stage dimmed, and the entire venue became quiet again. Jiang Chuyi glanced at him, steadied her trembling hands, and strummed the strings. With that sound, Zong Ye’s deep voice rang out.

You were here before
Couldn’t look you in the eye
……
……

Until reaching the climax of the song, Jiang Chuyi leaned towards the standing microphone and softly began to sing, joining his voice.

You’re so very special
I wish I was special
But I’m a creep
……
……

Wang Tan shook his head and applauded, sighing, “Our Zong Ye is indeed the most deeply emotional in the entertainment industry. Without being hurt by thirty women, he couldn’t sing with this kind of feeling.”

Ji Kai also commented, “I can only say, Teacher Jiang’s singing has no technique, only emotion.”

The director sat behind the camera and shouted to the stage, “Zong Ye, sing one more song. The length is still a bit short!”

Zong Ye had no choice. He turned his head and asked Jiang Chuyi, “Whose songs do you like to listen to?”

Jiang Chuyi was still immersed in the emotions from earlier. She subconsciously answered, “Jay Chou.”

Zong Ye: “…”

Ji Kai, sitting in the front row, laughed wildly, “Look at Zong Ye’s expression. Did he think Teacher Jiang was going to say his songs?”

Jiang Chuyi reacted and immediately tried to make up for it, “Your songs are fine too.”

Zong Ye smiled and didn’t ask her again. He got up and went to communicate with the staff in charge of the accompaniment on the side of the stage.

At the production team’s request, Zong Ye sang a solo to conclude tonight’s show.

During the ten-minute preparation, Zong Ye took out his phone and searched for lyrics.

Jiang Chuyi couldn’t help but be curious, “What are you going to sing?”

“You’ll know in a bit.”

Seeing that he wouldn’t tell her, Jiang Chuyi didn’t pursue the question further.

Soon, the staff gestured an OK sign. Zong Ye put down his phone. As the familiar prelude played, Jiang Chuyi listened for a while, and the expression on her face underwent a subtle change.

“The storylines are written by you, a little confusing between us”
……
……

“One whole day, I’ve been humming a rhythm for more than a thousand times.
And as always, I’m not going home without being drunk.”

Feng Miaotong hadn’t heard this song before and quietly asked the person beside her, “What song is Zong Ye singing?”

“Jay Chou’s <Failure at Love>>.”

Under the night sky, with the shadowy trees, his gentle low voice flowed. Jiang Chuyi looked at the colorful little light bulbs hanging in the courtyard, listening intently.

“The winter without you
I can only keep singing
Till you appear–”

His voice suddenly paused.

Jiang Chuyi couldn’t help but look over, meeting Zong Ye’s gaze.

*

The recording of the second episode was completed, and it was already past twelve o’clock. The staff were tidying up the venue. Xu Zhi and Quan Yongning were smoking and chatting by a tree.

Jiang Chuyi sat alone in an inconspicuous corner.

Zhao Guangyu came over and said a few words to her. Being bitten badly by mosquitoes, he hurriedly stood up, “I have to get up early tomorrow to catch a flight. I won’t chat with you anymore. I’m going to bed first.”

Jiang Chuyi struggled to put on a smile, “You go ahead.”

“What’s wrong?” Zhao Guangyu hesitated for a moment and leaned over to look at her, “Why are you so unhappy?”

“No… I’m just thinking about something.”

Zhao Guangyu: “Alright then, I’ll go first.”

Jiang Chuyi nodded.

The light from her phone screen was on. She scrolled through the lyrics of <Failure at Love>>, continuing to space out.

Until another person came and sat down beside her.

Jiang Chuyi hastily covered her phone.

Zong Ye: “What are you looking at?”

Jiang Chuyi didn’t say a word and shook her head.

The two sat quietly for a while. Zong Ye took the initiative to speak, “You seem to have been unhappy since the afternoon. Is something on your mind?”

Jiang Chuyi continued to shake her head.

“Were you scared by the joke I made with Wang Tan at noon?” Zong Ye asked again.

Jiang Chuyi: “No.”

Gazing at the swaying little colored lights in the distance, Zong Ye said, “Then… have you discovered that pretending to like me is a bit difficult and you regret it now?”

Jiang Chuyi sat still, pondering a little.

“It’s not that I regret it, it’s just…” Jiang Chuyi’s throat felt dry, “Zong Ye, I might not be able to play the game you mentioned.”

Zong Ye was stunned.

Jiang Chuyi felt uneasy. She forced out an awkward smile, “Otherwise, let’s not play anymore. In the future, we’ll just do whatever the production team arranges.”

“Playing a game.”

He silently repeated it twice.

After a long while, a hint of confusion appeared on Zong Ye’s face, “Did I make you unhappy? Or did mentioning Zhao Guangyu upset you?”

Jiang Chuyi interrupted him, “No, it has nothing to do with him. I’m not unhappy either.”

Zong Ye was still not quite certain, “Chuyi, if I said anything inappropriate to you these past two days, I can apologize.”

“It’s not that…” Jiang Chuyi’s voice became a bit helpless, “Zong Ye, I don’t know if you like me or not… I can only guess on my own.”

“But, but no matter what, we can’t go on like this. When the show airs, you will be scolded terribly. We will both regret it.” Jiang Chuyi repeatedly said, “We can’t do this. The song you sang today shouldn’t have been sung either.”

She said “can’t” several times in a row, causing Zong Ye to fall silent.

Without waiting for his response, Jiang Chuyi quickly added, “If you don’t have any special thoughts about me, just treat it as me being narcissistic. Don’t take my words to heart. Let’s stay friends like before. When the variety show ends, I’ll clarify things for you. This is good for everyone.”

“Let’s stay friends like before. It’s good for everyone.” Zong Ye repeated her words, smiling faintly, “What do you want to clarify for me?”

“I know it’s strange for me to say sorry.” Jiang Chuyi paused, “But I still want to apologize to you. I seem to mess up a lot of things and now I’m saying these meaningless words to you, making you feel worse.”

Zong Ye: “It’s okay.”

It seemed that no matter what she did or said, he could accept it all.

In the pitch-black night, Zong Ye propped his forehead with his right hand and said in a low voice, “I was out of line these past two days.”

“No, it’s not your problem. We’ve both been a bit weird these two days.” Jiang Chuyi carefully glanced at him and put on a relieved look, her tone light, “Anyway, it’s good that we’ve talked it out.”

She probably didn’t know that her guilt was written all over her face.

Perhaps, she only felt guilty towards him.

Zong Ye chuckled, not responding to her last sentence, as if the topic had ended there.

The two fell into silence again.

He leaned forward and took the paper box on the coffee table.

Jiang Chuyi couldn’t help but turn her eyes to stare at his actions.

Zong Ye picked up the lighter. His thumb slid across the flint wheel, making a light clicking sound. The flame leaped, illuminating his clear and handsome profile.

Zong Ye’s other hand held a piece of paper, bringing it close to the lighter. Soon, the flame licked the tissue.

His expression was cold as he quietly watched the paper being devoured by the fire, burning to ashes.

Even when the flame was already burning his fingers, he didn’t let go, as if he was numb to the pain.

Jiang Chuyi was completely stunned.

After burning this piece of paper, Zong Ye took another one and repeated his previous actions. While doing this, his expression remained calm from beginning to end.

Not far away, a few staff members peeked over, observing the situation, not knowing whether they should step forward or not.

She stiffened, shocked by the eerie scene, and spoke up to stop him, “What are you doing? Aren’t you afraid of pain?”

Zong Ye’s fingers loosened.

The paper slowly fell to his feet.

“What?”

Jiang Chuyi came back to her senses, “Why are you suddenly burning paper?”

“Do you want to try?” Zong Ye said blandly, “It’s very stress-relieving.”

“…”

Jiang Chuyi glanced at the burn marks on his fingers. She wanted to say something, but the words reached her lips and she swallowed them back.

Zong Ye tossed the lighter to her.

Jiang Chuyi hesitated for a moment. Under his gaze, she picked up the lighter and imitated his earlier actions, lighting a piece of paper.

She held the paper with two fingers. When the fire was about to reach her fingers, she hurriedly and nervously dropped it.

The paper fell lightly to the ground, quickly extinguishing and turning into a pile of ashes.

After a while, Jiang Chuyi said in a very small voice, “This… doesn’t seem to relieve stress either.”

Zong Ye turned his head to look at her, “Chuyi?”

Jiang Chuyi glanced at him.

Zong Ye said something inexplicable, “Do you think I’m like this piece of paper?”

She didn’t understand.

“Being lit by you, being watched by you as I burn.” Zong Ye was still smiling. When he spoke to her, his expression was always very gentle, “Then, being discarded by you.”