MDSR | CH 01

~Chapter 1~

Being a mom doesn’t mean you do everything perfectly. You just pretend to be good at it, rushing through things. Because you have to.

“If you get married, everything you want will come true easily.”

“It was something a fortune teller told me when I was 20, still a young girl.”

It was a scam.

On top of that, I wasted two silver coins, which was all the money I had at that time, on that worthless fortune-telling. 

Then, as if that wasn’t enough, I went back home after running away.

Back to a home where a marriage with a man I didn’t love was waiting for me.

Maybe it all started after I got married.

The moment my life, which had already been hopeless, fell into complete ruin.

Now, I’m 73 years old.

I’ve been through everything life could throw at me, and not much surprises me anymore now. But I definitely don’t want to go back to being young.

My name is Charlotte D. Arista.

And today, my son Bliss Arista officially becomes the Duke of Arista.

It was a cold winter afternoon. Standing at the mansion’s entrance, I clicked my tongue at the gloomy sky.

“On such a good day, why does the weather have to be like this?”

Behind me, the head butler, who had noticed my concern, spoke up.

“Madam, don’t worry. Despite the bad weather, the Marquis… no, the Duke will return safely.”

“Of course. My Bliss isn’t just anyone.”

I responded lightly, stretching my shoulders. 

The elderly butler, who had grown old alongside me, gave me a broad smile.

He stood there with all the servants and maids of the house as if posing for a painting.

It brought back memories.

I knew it all along.

All those servants and maids standing behind Hans, the head butler—they weren’t here to welcome him. 

They were following me to greet my son, Bliss, on this freezing winter day.

I felt the corners of my mouth twitch as I looked forward again.

‘Forty-five years ago, this would’ve been impossible. Who would’ve guessed? The widow of the Marquis of Arista kicked out onto the streets with her only son, would one day raise him to become a Duke.’

My gaze traveled beyond the front yard to the distant iron gate.

The large, elegant iron gate was wide open, just like my heart was for Bliss.

Maybe that’s why, for today at least, the freezing winter wind that seemed to cut through to the bone felt bearable to me.

But it seemed I was the only one feeling that way.

Behind me, I could hear the murmurs of the nameless servants.

“Our madam sure has a lot of energy. Two hours standing out here already, in this cold.”

“Of course. She finally got what she wanted.”

“The Duke—he’s got every problem you can think of except for gambling, drinking, and women! And now, he’s one of only two dukes in the entire country!”

“Isn’t this what they call the end of the world? Who knows how much worse his behavior will get now?”

“Right. Even when he was just a marquis, he didn’t treat us, or even the madam, like people.”

I clenched my teeth.

It seems these fools think I’ve lost my hearing in my old age.

‘How dare servants talk about their master like that.’

I started to speak quietly to the butler, but I didn’t finish my sentence.

“Hans, right now, get rid of those—”

“Madam! The Duke has arrived!”

“Oh!”

Hans was right. 

A white carriage bearing the Arista family crest had passed through the iron gate and was now entering the front yard that I had so carefully maintained.

It was the day my son became Duke, so I decided to let the insolence of those servants slide.

Finally, the carriage stopped not far from where I stood. I hurried over to it.

“Bliss! My Duke has arrived!”

“Mother.”

From inside the tightly closed carriage, his pleasant voice rang out.

A moment later, my proud son stepped out of the carriage.

With honey-gold hair and blue eyes, his sharp physique belied his 53 years of age.

Not only that, he seemed to have escaped the marks of time, with only a few wrinkles on his face—and even those made him look like a charming middle-aged man.

The perfect image of a noble leader of the political aristocrats.

I beamed as I saw the large red envelope in his hand.

“My goodness! Is that the document officially granting you the Duke title from His Majesty? Let me see!”

But I never got the chance to open that red envelope.

Bliss swatted away my hand with a sharp sound.

Feeling a sting in my shoulder from the sudden pain, I shrank back as he clicked his tongue.

“Tsk. Please go inside, Mother. The servants are watching. What a scene you’re causing. No wonder people insult me behind my back, saying I’m a fatherless brat.”

His harsh words pierced my heart. 

I quickly apologized.

“I’m sorry, Bliss. I got carried away with excitement.”

“As long as you understand.”

I forced myself to smile at him, putting all my feelings into that smile.

“Of course. I’ll be more careful from now on. I don’t want to embarrass our Duke.”

“Yes. If you get the chance.”

Bliss smirked, as if he had something more in mind.

Seeing that smile, I had a sudden suspicion.

‘He’s going to send me away to a rural estate, isn’t he?’

Even though I knew it was inevitable, my chest tightened with sadness.

There was no helping it. 

Sending a child out into the world is always a sad thing, no matter when it happens.

‘But it’s time for me to retire too. My dream of making my son a Duke has finally come true.’

Yes. I was finally free from taking care of Bliss and cleaning up after him.

No one knows how much effort it took to stop Bliss from causing trouble for others.

From the time I took him in at age 20 until now, at 73, it’s been a long, exhausting journey of raising him.

***

Dinner that evening with Bliss didn’t go well, even though it was just the two of us.

Bliss twisted his lips in dissatisfaction, deep in thought.

“His Majesty… It’s ridiculous. On the day the Duke of Arista is born, he sends me nothing but this piece of paper. It’s as if he’s giving me a title out of obligation.”

Shocked, I put down my knife and fork and looked around cautiously.

“Bliss! Watch your words.”

“What? I can’t even say what I want in my own house, with my own mouth?”

“Bliss.”

“Of course. You’ve never been satisfied with me, Mother. I get it. You wasted your youth, tied down by an adopted son.”

“That’s nonsense!”

I hurried to correct his misunderstanding.

“Bliss, I’ve never once thought of you as anything less than my own son. You are my child, no matter what anyone says. Without question.”

Bliss let out a short sigh. 

Luckily, he seemed to be calming down a bit.

“Don’t try to calm me down like that. You make it sound like I’m some kid.”

“I’m sorry. You’ll always be a child to me, no matter how grown up you are.”

“Well, you’ve worked hard all these years.”

“Huh?”

I was taken aback by his rare words of appreciation.

Bliss smiled, revealing his white teeth—a smile I hadn’t seen often from him.

“If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have made it this far. Thank you. Ever since Father passed away and we were kicked out of the marquis’ household, it feels like just yesterday, but now I’m the Duke of Arista.”

“Bliss…”

My hand instinctively went to my chest as I felt my nose tingle with emotion.

‘Finally, my son is thanking me.’

Bliss got up from his seat and approached me with a bottle of wine.

“Here, this is a special drink I’m offering you myself.”

My dear son poured me the first glass. I was so moved that I felt like crying, but I held back my tears, unsure how he would react.

“Thank you,” I said.

“It’s nothing. But there’s something you should know.”

“Really? What other good news do you have for me?”

“I’m going to remarry Lady Chexter’s daughter.”

Suddenly, I felt a sharp pain in the back of my neck, and my mouth hung open in shock.

“What? What about Josephine?”

Josephine was Bliss’s wife, my daughter-in-law.

Bliss snorted like it was no big deal.

“Why should I care about a woman who runs off to her parents’ house just because of a little fight?”

I nervously took a sip of wine, trying to calm my dry throat.

‘I thought Bliss would never cause trouble with women, but now this!’

My hand trembled as I set my half-empty glass down on the table.

Even though I loved Bliss dearly, I couldn’t side with him on this.

“Bliss! Don’t say such things! Do you even know how heartbroken Josephine is over this?”

“No matter what you say, I’ve made up my mind.”

I was so upset that I started coughing uncontrollably.

“No, you can’t! Divorce is absolutely not an option! How could you talk about remarrying while you still have a perfectly good wife? Cough, cough!”

I must have been too shocked because the coughing wouldn’t stop, and I was struggling to catch my breath.

Bliss just laughed.

“No, I will divorce Josephine. She isn’t fit to be the wife of the only duke in the empire.”

“I don’t understand. A duke? How could you become a duke?”

Suddenly, he smiled confidently, as if he had everything figured out.

“Yes, Mother. Your dream was just to make me a duke, but my dream starts now.”

A strange smile played across his lips.

“Even the Emperor will have to watch out for me.”

At that moment, something from deep inside me surged up.

I coughed up something thick and sticky—dark, clotted blood.

My body stiffened as I fell from my chair, crawling on the floor of the dining hall.

My insides felt like they were burning, and the uncontrollable coughing continued, deafening me.

More blood spilled out of my mouth.

‘Could this be poison?!’

I looked up at Bliss, my eyes bloodshot.

He grinned.

“Thanks to the assassination of the duchess, I will become the Grand Duke of Arista. Thank you, Mother, for giving me the perfect excuse to frame the royalists.”

I couldn’t comprehend it.

Still lying on the floor, I used all my strength to grab the hem of my son’s pants.

I had to know.

“Bliss, why? I’m your mother. Why must I die?”

“I told you, I’m going to be the Grand Duke. Tsk tsk, I can’t believe a woman as foolish as you was my adoptive mother.”

Bliss mocked me without mercy.

“Don’t you get it? I don’t need you anymore.”

Suddenly, everything went dark.

It was death.

***

I gasped for air, waking up like a fish thrown out of water.

Ironically, I found myself staring at a familiar yet unfamiliar ceiling.

What in the world? I was lying on a shabby bed I wouldn’t use even if someone gave it to me.

“Where am I? No, more importantly, what was that? Was it a dream? Yes, it must have been a dream. How ridiculous, dreaming of being poisoned by Bliss.”

But why? Why was my heart still pounding so hard over a mere dream?

Shivering, I curled up tightly, overwhelmed by an indescribable loneliness, sorrow, and pain.

I don’t know how much time passed, but then I realized something strange—my vision was perfectly clear.

“That’s odd. Why can I see so well without my reading glasses? And why is the winter weather so warm?”

Slowly, I stepped down from the old bed.

That’s when I noticed the narrow, shabby room and the mirror hanging on the wall.

In the mirror, I saw a young woman with a smooth face, free of any wrinkles, looking back at me.

I knew that face very well.

Of course, I did! It was my face from when I was 28 years old!

“Could it be? Have I gone back in time?”