“Being a chaplain without consulting me, I can’t allow it. Cancel it.”
Lark also ordered the cancellation of the chaplain’s work with a very annoyed look on his face.
Elaine felt a surge of anger at his arrogant and coercive tone. Lark was still treating Elaine like a pawn in his hands.
“No.”
“Elaine Newt. Do you think I’m giving you a choice right now?”
“Who are you to say that? It’s my life, why are you telling me what to do?”
“Are you going to rebel against your family’s decision?”
“Yeah. So, can that smart Newt please erase me from the family register?”
There was a tense atmosphere between Elaine and Lark.
Lark sighed deeply and began to console Elaine in a low voice.
“Elaine. You’re still young. Don’t you think it’s that easy to live in someone else’s house?”
“Don’t you know? Who else knows better than me how hard it is to live off of a meal that is not worth it?”
“That’s proof that you don’t know anything. If it was that hard for you to live at your uncle’s house, how much harder would it be to live at another house?”
“Lark. You’re the one who doesn’t know anything. You really don’t know a thing about my life.”
“Elaine!”
Lark shouted at the mocking sarcasm of the young Elaine.
But Elaine wasn’t afraid of Lark at all anymore.
The anger that had been piled up like a thick layer on the surface of her fragile heart now became Elaine’s armor and sword and was directed at Lark.
She stares intently into Lark’s eyes and tells the story of Newt’s family’s crimes.
“At least I won’t starve at Count Lindel’s house. They won’t dare to lock me up or beat me, a saint of the Temple of Pavelo, and they won’t make me live in the shabbiest room in the mansion without heat. There, I won’t have to do the menial work of the maids, I won’t have to walk around like a criminal, and I won’t have to be watched by others. That alone will make my life much better than at Newt’s.”
Elaine held back her ragged breaths, trying not to explode.
She could still remember so vividly her own miserable, wretched childhood, and Lark, who lived in the same house as her, holding up his arbitrary ideas as if they were the truth, trying to admonish her.
She felt like vomiting because it was so disgusting.
‘I can’t believe I liked this man! There was something wrong with me in my past life!’
Elaine gritted her teeth.
But Lark pretended not to see Elaine’s anger and just repeated what he wanted to say like a parrot.
“No way. A Chaplain of the Newt family is a disgrace to the family name! Are you a beggar?”
“I was a beggar when I lived at your house. Do you know that Emily got fired for bringing me rotten bread and food that was just about to spoil?”
“Shouldn’t she be fired for bringing that kind of food?”
“Oh my goodness, Lark. You really don’t know anything. Emily was worried that I would starve, so she brought me food in secret. That’s why I survived. Your mother really tried to kill me!”
Lark’s eyes widened as if he had never heard that story before.
However, he did not dismiss Elaine’s story as a lie, as he thought it was quite possible.
Instead, he talked nonsense, as if he was offering compensation.
“If you’re going to become a full-time chaplain because of what you’ve been through, I’ll put some extra money in your allowance.”
“What I want is to cut ties with Newt.”
“Stop talking nonsense!”
The conversation, which had been going at each other repeatedly, eventually failed to find common ground.
Then Lark stood up, announcing as if it were a last resort.
“I’ll speak to Count Lindell myself. There must have been some mistake there as well. It’s ridiculous for such a noble family to have an illegitimate child as their chaplain.”
“Lark!”
Elaine tried to stop him, but Lark pretended not to hear her and just left the room.
Elaine left alone, clenched her fists, and trembled.
This was her position. An accessory to the Newt family, whose life depended on the word of Lark or Rubaine, no matter how hard she tried.
The Newt’s had never treated her as useful, never discarded her, never let her go, and yet they’d controlled her life
The reason Elaine in her previous life followed their decision was because she loved Lark. She believed that if it weren’t for Newt, she had no one to lean on.
‘What would have happened to me if I hadn’t loved Lark?’
‘If only I hadn’t been faced with the realization that I was powerless to do anything about this situation, even as the anger in my stomach threatened to burn my insides….’
‘Would I have to despair and consider it my fate like other girls from noble families?’
‘Should I give up and surrender, and leave my fate in the hands of Rubaine or Lark?’
‘No, no.’
Elaine shook her head, remembering her last attempt to leave the temple without notifying Newt.
Elaine was not a helpless loser.
Even though she was passive, she had the will to fight against fate and build her own life.
‘It was those people who broke even that small will to survive somehow.’
Elaine decided not to blame her past life, where she was dragged away as a sacrifice and was unable to escape Newt’s trap until the very end.
Throughout her life, she has been brainwashed by the words, “Look back at yourself rather than blaming others.”
So Elaine always thought that her sad and miserable life was her fault.
But now she knows.
‘I did my best….I did my best not to give up on the life my mother gave me in exchange for her own life.’
She had done her best to understand and forgive people, and she had done her best to adapt and not despair at the reality that they had put her in.
However, the reason why God’s mercy did not reach her was not because she was lacking, but because humans who treated other people’s lives like flies interfered.
She was not granted even a shred of strength to defeat them.
‘Is that why Lord Bara sent Rabes to me?’
Now Elaine has the most powerful assistant on earth.
The power of Rabes was always with her, so she had nothing to fear.
Thanks to this, Elaine was able to maintain her composure despite Lark’s arbitrary announcements.
‘The greatest gift that Rabes gave me was this sense of stability.’
Unlike her previous life, when she was busy trembling with anxiety and worry about what might happen at any time, Elaine now was able to hold on to a shred of composure no matter how much injustice she faced.
She even had the ridiculous thought that this was the taste of power.
Taking a deep breath to calm her anger, Elaine entered the room and called out to Rabes.
“Rabes!”
[What’s wrong? Your expression is a bit strange.]
“Lark has come.”
[Lark? Why that guy?]
“When I told him that I would become the chaplain of the Lindell family, he said that I would never be allowed to do so, and he tried to manipulate me into doing whatever he wanted.”
At that story, Rabes’ eyes burned brightly.
[This time, think about it seriously, Elaine. I told you, there’s no benefit to keeping him alive for too long.]
“Murder is not allowed. Even Lord Bara will not forgive murder.”
[You still have feelings for that guy, don’t you?]
“Not at all. I’ll leave him alive and make him regret it.”
[What a surprise.]
Rabes didn’t seem to trust Elaine’s determination, but he didn’t insist on killing Lark. Maybe he had given up halfway.
“Anyway, Lark is going to tell Count Lindell to cancel this matter directly, so isn’t there something we can do?”
[Hah! Seeing as he thinks everything will go his way, I guess he’s never experienced failure?]
“Hmm, I guess so?”
[Then this is the first time he’s going to learn failure.]
Rabes laughed as if he found it ridiculous.
“How do you know?”
[You don’t even trust your own friend? That guy named Sergey is your friend, right?]
“Yeah, but I think it’s his parents who are in charge of this, not Sergey. The butler said that if he didn’t bring the chaplain, his head would be off. Sergey wouldn’t have made such a threat…”
[Ahem! Well, that was probably a joke. Don’t worry, just pack your bags and I’ll take care of it somehow. Didn’t you say they will come pick you up in a week?]
Although Elaine was a little worried, she decided to enjoy some of the ‘power’ she had.
“Yes. Then I will pack my bags and trust only in you, Rabes.”
Looking at Elaine smiling brightly again, Rabes also smiled with satisfaction.
* * *
