The car started again and drove for a while longer before Lin Sitao pretended to wake up. He noticed that He Xian seemed completely unaffected and had a calm expression on his face.
As they were about to get off the car, Lin Sitao said, “Director He, I will go back to study for my senior year and take the college entrance exam.”
People were strange. His grandmother had advised him, and his class teacher had talked to him about it, but he only pondered over it for months. However, he couldn’t resist the desire to see He Xian smile at him.
When He Xian heard this, he did indeed smile and looked at Lin Sitao, saying, “That’s great. The college entrance exam isn’t actually that scary.”
Lin Sitao pursed his lips and nodded. He felt a bit regretful that he had been too nervous to speak when he went out with He Xian earlier, but now that he felt comfortable talking, it was time to leave.
“Before I go, can I come find you to say goodbye?” he asked He Xian.
“Sure!” He Xian replied and wrote his number on a Post-it note and handed it to Lin Sitao. “Call this number to reach me.”
Lin Sitao held the note with the number and by the time he walked back to his dorm, he had memorized the 11 digits by heart. He tried his best not to think about the phone call that He Xian received in the car. He shouldn’t have heard those words, it was He Xian’s privacy.
However, phrases like “what if” and “just in case” kept rolling through his mind and he couldn’t seem to stop them.
Nonetheless, it seemed like it was Lin Sitao’s lucky day. The heavy rain continued all the way into the evening. Everyone in the dormitory was preoccupied with playing cards and no one paid attention to him.
He went out again to call Xu Dan, and this time, she finally picked up the phone.
“Are you really not mad at me at all?” Xu Dan asked him.
It was then that Lin Sitao realized that he had never really considered Xu Dan to be his girlfriend.
He then asked her, “Do you like Curly?”
Xu Dan made a scoffing noise, which was as good as admitting it.
Lin Sitao asked, “Would you be angry if I liked someone else?”
Xu Dan immediately replied, “Why would I be angry?”
She said it too quickly and even heard her own unease.
The two fell silent for a moment, before Lin Sitao said cheerfully, “Oh, right! I brought you a whole set of Yu Weiyan’s novels.”
“Really?” Xu Dan perked up.
They didn’t bring up the awkward topic of who liked whom or who did what anymore. Lin Sitao told her, “After working for a month, I’ll come back in mid-July.”
Xu Dan felt relieved and said, “Working on a construction site must be tough. But it’s good that you’re coming back. Your grades are good and didn’t Old Zhang say that you have a good chance of getting into a second-tier university if you work hard? But why did you suddenly decide to come back?”
Lin Sitao’s original problem wasn’t about his grades, but rather his family’s economic situation. The problem still hasn’t been resolved, but he suddenly received an unfathomable inspiration and strength that made him unafraid of anything.
“I’ve figured it out,” he said. “Striving upwards is the way to go, going downwards is just escaping.”
In mid-July, Lin Sitao received a month’s worth of salary and bought a train ticket to go back home. Old Chen didn’t directly persuade him to stay, but only said, “Your grandfather and grandmother are getting old. It’s already quite difficult for them to support you until you finish high school.”
Lin Sitao had already packed his luggage – an old travel bag that contained a few simple clothes and daily necessities for changing, and the most important thing was the bag of materials that He Xian had given him, which he carefully placed at the bottom of the bag.
“I want to finish high school and at least get a high school diploma. As for the future, I’ll figure it out after I graduate from high school,” he said gratefully to Old Chen. After all, without Old Chen taking him out on this trip, he would have been hesitating at home without any comparisons or references.
On the night before he left, Lin Sitao called He Xian’s phone.
“Can I come over now?” he asked.
He Xian hesitated for a moment and said, “Sure, I’m here.”
Lin Sitao heard the hesitation in his voice, and his heart twisted: “If it’s not convenient, then…”
He Xian spoke gently, “Come over, I still have something to give you. If you don’t come, I’ll have to go find you.”
Lin Sitao carried his travel bag and a bag of apples and hurried to He Xian’s temporary apartment around 7 o’clock in the evening. In the summer, the daylight still shone brightly, with shades of indigo and purple covering the ground all day. Lin Sitao’s heart was filled with tenderness and ambition.
When he arrived, He Xian seemed to be busy with something. He wore a pair of black-framed glasses and had an open laptop on the sofa beside him.
“What time is your train tomorrow?” he asked Lin Sitao.
“8:00 am in the morning,” Lin Sitao replied.
He Xian asked him to put down his things.
“Then you can stay here tonight. Tomorrow morning, I’ll have Zheng send you to the train station,” He Xian conveyed.
Zheng was He Xian’s driver. He immediately called Zheng without giving Lin Sitao any chance to hesitate or refuse.
He Xian closed his laptop and sat cross-legged on the sofa, chatting with Lin Sitao.
“I haven’t been back to my hometown for a long time. What’s it like around Yuhu Lake now?” He Xian asked him.
Lin Sitao replied, “They built a new square and a 15-meter-high artificial fountain by the lake. In the summer evenings, there is a light show, and many people go to watch it.”
He Xian was lost in his memories. He remembered that when he was a child, there was no decoration there except for the steps that extended into the lake. There were many people fishing, and his uncle sometimes went fishing by the lake too.
After the two of them had finished dinner, He Xian cut some fruit and brought ice cream for Lin Sitao.
He then took out a book from the drawer and handed it to Lin Sitao.
It was a teaching guidebook written by a renowned teacher.
“This is Ms. Liu, the English teacher from my old school. She has a lot of experience with the college entrance exam and is now retired, running her own tutoring class. I got her contact information and arranged for your tuition fee. If you have free time on weekends or holidays, you can go to her class and listen in,” He Xian explained to Lin Sitao.
Lin Sitao opened the book and saw Teacher Liu’s contact information and classroom address written on the first page.
However, his mind was fuzzy at the moment.
There was something very important Lin Sitao desperately wanted to tell to He Xian, but it seemed like he couldn’t speak nor shouldn’t say it.
“You should go take a shower now, get some rest early tonight, and wake up refreshed tomorrow,” He Xian urged Lin Sitao, checking the time. It was already 9:30 in the evening.
“Ah.” Lin Sitao opened his mouth and made only this sound. He walked into the bathroom and washed quickly. In the steamy mist, he shook his hair. This time, he wore his own clothes – a pair of boxer shorts and an old, washed-out t-shirt as pajamas.
He took a deep breath several times and walked out of the bathroom.
He Xian was busy on the computer again. He didn’t even raise his head when he heard Lin Sitao’s voice and said, “You can sleep in my room. I’m leaving at ten tonight and won’t be sleeping here. Zheng Shifu will send you to the train station tomorrow morning.”
Lin Sitao stood still and asked, “Alone?”
He Xian said, “I have something to do.” He looked up and froze – Lin Sitao’s legs were exposed, with a t-shirt covering his underwear. At first glance, he looked like he wasn’t wearing anything underneath.
The boy was not tall but had long and straight legs, slightly thin and weak, still resembling a child rather than a muscular and powerful adult.
He Xian only glanced over and said, “It’s fine, it’s safe here. Just make sure to close the door before you leave.”
He continued to stare at the computer screen.
Lin Sitao stood there, feeling like one step back would end everything, but this should have ended already. He came here today just to say goodbye.
“Director He…” he stuttered, “I want to say…”
He Xian looked at him again. “What is it?”
Lin Sitao’s face turned red with embarrassment.
“I want to say thank you, for helping me so much!” he almost cried.
He Xian smiled. “You really are like a child. If we’re talking about helping, you actually helped me more.”
Lin Sitao was confused.
He Xian said, “That day on the bridge, I was drunk. If I had completely climbed onto the railing, I would have either died or been seriously injured if I fell.” He joked, “You could be considered my life-saving benefactor.”
Lin Sitao felt like all the blood in his body was drained.
Everything made sense now. From beginning to end, He Xian treated him like a child, taking him out to eat, buy books, and visit the university campus, urging him to continue his studies. All as if he were a student.
He prayed that He Xian hadn’t noticed anything; otherwise, he would have been labeled as “self-delusional” at this moment.
Just as Lin Sitao was struggling to catch his breath from the awkwardness, there were suddenly two knocks on the door outside, like a heavenly sound, saving him.
Lin Sitao and He Xiàn both looked towards the door.
After the soft two knocks, there was a sudden pound.
“He Xian!” a voice weakly cried out with a hint of sobbing.
He Xian stood up and said to Lin Sitao, “Go into the room and sleep.”
He then went to open the door.
Before Lin Sitao could enter the room, he heard a muffled groan from He Xian. The person outside the door stiffly crashed into He Xian’s arms. Meanwhile, He Xian couldn’t hold him back, almost falling to the ground. He stumbled a few steps before stabilizing himself.
Lin Sitao was startled and immediately went to help He Xian lift the unexpected guest onto the sofa.
The guest tightly closed his eyes and lay on the sofa, tears streaking down his face. Even so, Lin Sitao was still shocked – he had never seen such a handsome man before.
He Xian was handsome, but this man was just beautiful. His eyebrows and nose were like the strokes of a classical oil painter, paired with fair skin. Lin Sitao couldn’t imagine what he would look like with his eyes open.
He Xian didn’t look up at Lin Sitao again. He knelt at the edge of the sofa, only staring at his beautiful friend lying on the sofa. Lin Sitao couldn’t help but hold his breath.
The room was eerily quiet for a moment.
He Xian raised his hand and stroked the guest’s hair, his fingers wiping away the tears that kept streaming down.
“Song You…” He called out his name in a low voice.
Song You’s long eyelashes trembled as he slowly opened his eyes. His eyes, washed by tears, were black and clear. He grabbed He Xian’s hand, stood up suddenly, and climbed onto He Xian’s shoulder, kissing his lips.
It was a passionate and deep kiss. Lin Sitao quietly retreated from the room and gently closed the door. No one saw him.
─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───
T/N : No…
