Cedric seemed to know this too, as he didn’t immediately respond. Just as water spilled from a fallen cup cannot be gathered up again, so too could the answer he might give now not be taken back later.
A while passed, and finally, after finishing his contemplation, he slowly opened his mouth.
“I believe that, in part, it is my fault that my brother ended up this way. Hence, one of my goals is ‘atonement’.”
“Ah.”
So that was what he meant by ‘atonement’.
As I was unraveling the doubts that had been knotted up inside me, Cedric slightly lifted the corners of his mouth.
I was first surprised by the smile I saw for the first time, and then secondarily surprised by the sight of his usually cold demeanor softening due to that smile.
Wow, he could make such an expression, too.
While I was barely suppressing the admiration about to burst forth, Cedric’s rosy lips moved.
“I will take that hand.”
“That means…”
“Yes. I’ll try it once. Being the heir of one of the four great ducal families.”
Unlike someone who had just been hesitating, Cedric’s face showed a firm resolution.
Overwhelmed by a sense of relief that things had turned out well, I started to instinctively stroke my chest but stopped myself and modestly placed my hands on my knees instead. And then I spoke in a calm tone.
“Thank you for making a decision quickly. So, what are we going to do about going back to the temple tomorrow?”
“For now, I plan to return as scheduled.”
“Really… Yes?”
I couldn’t hide my surprise when a variable occurred in the situation that I thought would proceed smoothly as I had expected. Contrary to my reaction, Cedric repeated lifting and lowering his eyelids as if asking me why he would ask something so obvious.
“No matter how urgent it is, one must go through the resignation process.”
“Uh… Is there a specific resignation process in the temple? Isn’t it just about submitting a resignation letter?”
“Yes. That place is where those who use divine power work and are baptized, so there are procedures that must be followed to return to the secular world.”
Ah.
I swallowed the sigh that rose in my throat.
At first, I didn’t understand the fact that there was a resignation process, but after hearing about it, my thoughts changed.
The temple was a place where only those who could use divine power, those who had been blessed with the grace of a god, could work.
Therefore, such temples were also called “places where the chosen ones gather” by people.
But if you look at it positively, it was so, but seen differently, it was different. Because only a few could enter, it also meant that it was that much more closed off. Therefore, the credibility of Cedric’s statement that one must go through official retirement procedures to leave the temple was further affirmed.
“I didn’t know.”
“Of course, you couldn’t have known. It’s very rare for someone who worked in the temple to return to the secular world.”
When I admitted without much ado that I had overlooked the fact that the empire and the temple are different systems, Cedric shrugged his shoulders.
However, his nonchalant behavior, contrary to what he said, contributed to my guilt.
It’s very rare for someone who worked in the temple to return to the secular world… Then, what about Cedric? Does he even want to return?
Suddenly, I realized that I hadn’t fully grasped this aspect when I was persuading him, making my heart grow heavier. Nevertheless, I spoke calmly and assuredly.
“Now Cedric will be one of those rare cases who return. But if returning to the secular world means receiving dishonorable treatment from the temple…”
“That won’t happen. And even if it does, I will make sure it doesn’t.”
“That’s a relief.”
I muttered sincerely. In truth, there was nothing I could do even though he was being treated that way. But I couldn’t tell him to stay in the temple either.
Cedric, who had firmly replied to me, glanced at his watch and fiddled with his sleeve.
“It’s already been an hour, so I think I should be going.”
“I see. I enjoyed our meeting today, Sir Cedric.”
I hope it wasn’t only a burdensome time for you, sir. Deliberately, I added those words while gently stroking an empty teacup with my fingertips.
To be honest, it was a shallow pretense. I already knew he must have felt burdened, yet I wanted to hear it was okay.
Noticing my true feelings, a slight smile appeared on Cedric’s lips.
“You speak of the obvious. I shall take my leave first then. Have a good day, Miss Obelton.”
And then, with a smooth motion, he got up, slightly bowed his head in farewell, and left the drawing room.
“……”
It’s finally over.
Silently watching his silver hair disappear, as soon as the drawing-room door closed, I relaxed my body. The accumulated fatigue belatedly took its toll.
Even the rising fatigue was suppressed by the strong joy that came upon me; it was okay. The joy came from realizing that one of the boulders on my shoulder had been resolved.
While I was fully enjoying that subtle feeling, I briefly forgot about Helen, but then she came to mind.
“……”
Suddenly, the tiredness pressing on the corners of my eyes intensified.
Is Helen next?
I murmured softly to myself while looking out the window.
The sky was patchy, it looked like it was definitely going to rain.
***
I sat in the living room killing time, and it wasn’t until the sky started to darken that I stood up from my seat. It was to change clothes before dinner.
Isabella seemed to have gone to help others again, as she was nowhere to be seen.
Of course, it wasn’t that such times didn’t exist at all, and usually, I could just pull the call bell if needed, but today, I didn’t feel the necessity to have her accompany me. Having been alone often made me feel habitually comfortable on my own, instead.
So, instead of pulling the bell to call Isabella, I headed to the bedroom by myself for the first time in a long while.
There were times I encountered maids cleaning as I passed through the corridors, but apart from those moments, a pleasant tranquility filled the surroundings. It would not be an exaggeration to say it was my first time feeling the empty corridors of the palace not so lonely since my arrival.
I tried to find out why the same surroundings appeared differently to me, and eventually realized that what had changed was not the external but myself.
I guess I’ve changed too. I thought I wouldn’t change at all.
While thinking and quietly chuckling to myself, I was drawn to the sound of hurried footsteps from the opposite direction. There was a woman with notably auburn hair, contrasting her blurry impression, wearing slightly disheveled maid’s attire, indicating she was a palace maid.
Is something the matter?
The moment I unconsciously stopped and curiously stared at the auburn-haired maid, my reflection was unexpectedly cast into the green eyes of the maid as she turned her gaze aside.
I was momentarily taken aback by the unexpected eye contact, then quickly composed myself and took the initiative. It would have been rude to ignore each other after having noticed one another without saying a word.
“Which group do you belong to……”
“…….”
“!”
Before I could even finish my question with a question mark, the maid who had withdrawn her gaze from me brushed past me. Since we were so close, our shoulders slightly bumped into each other as she passed.
What is this……?
I was dumbfounded by the maid who not only completely ignored my words but also bumped my shoulder as she went by. It was extremely rude, especially after we had made eye contact.
However, what bothered me more was the peculiar scent coming from the maid.
Since the servants working in the imperial palace lived in dormitories, they all had a similar scent of soap. Even Isabella, a maid of noble birth, had a faint smell of soap.
But, the maid who just bumped into my shoulder had a strong scent of flowers. The artificially sweet fragrance was so overpowering that I felt I could hardly stand it for a few more seconds without feeling nauseated.
Perfumes are said to be more valuable the stronger their scent, so how expensive was that?
Watching the redhead walk away, I frowned. An inexplicable anxiety crawled up my spine. Instinct screamed to grab the maid and interrogate her identity right then and there. A baseless certainty that I would regret letting her go if I did empowered my instincts.
“Excuse me…!”
After a brief hesitation, when I called out to her, the footsteps echoing in the corridor momentarily stopped.
Did it work?
It seemed for a moment she had stopped, and I almost felt relieved as I started to approach her. But as if she had never stopped, the maid swiftly twisted her body and disappeared down the stairs.
“……”
I stared blankly at the spot where the maid had been, then swallowed a laugh. Normally, I would get angry in such situations, but rather than anger, I felt only absurdity.
This is odd.
Doubts I couldn’t voice filled my stomach.
After standing there for a while, I soon regained my composure, turned around, and continued walking. The wriggling doubts remained, but I decided to discuss the matter with Ruth later and decide how to deal with it.
***
Upon reaching the front of my bedroom, the first thing that caught my eye was Isabella standing around with a letter in her hand.
It seemed she had been waiting for my return. I watched her pacing back and forth with her eyes on the floor, and then I drew a smile with my lips.
“Isabella.”
“Ah, Lady!”
Upon realizing I had arrived, joy clearly dripped from Isabella’s eyes.
“Why are you standing around here?”
“Well,” as I asked, Isabella briefly glanced at the letter she was holding and then stretched it out towards me.
“Lord Obelton has sent a letter to you, my lady.”
