I was enjoying a peaceful afternoon for the first time in a long while.
Tap, tap, tap.
“Hm?”
Frantic footsteps came from outside the bedroom.
Was it a visitor?
Thinking so, I slowly got up from the bed.
The mansion had been quite quiet for a few days, so I thought no more guests were coming, but that seemed not to be the case.
Which faction did this guest belong to this time? The emperor’s faction? Or maybe the aristocrat faction? It could also be the neutral faction.
I walked on tiptoes to the window and stood on my toes to look out. The window wasn’t too small to see outside, but I couldn’t comfortably look out without standing on my toes.
“Ah?”
While I was watching for a while, I widened my eyes upon spotting my father getting onto a carriage with the Obelton family crest painted on it.
It was good to see my father after a long time, but what surprised me was something else.
Being the empire’s prime minister, my father always went to the palace to work only on Wednesdays. Other times, he worked from the mansion.
But it was practically the same as breaking the unspoken rule that had always been observed since six years ago for my father to leave the mansion on a day that wasn’t Wednesday.
Why? I watched the departing carriage with suspicion until it completely vanished from my sight, and only then did I step away from the window.
It was the first time my father was not in the mansion on a day that wasn’t Wednesday.
Mumbling to myself, I was about to lie back down on the bed when a good idea suddenly crossed my mind.
There was once I couldn’t make it to Ruth.
Since my father isn’t here now and there’s nothing else to do, wouldn’t it be okay to visit him for a bit?
Seeing Ruth, thinking about him gives me palpitations; I feel like I could immediately find out the reason my thoughts always gravitate towards him.
Listing the many benefits of going to see him, I turned away from the bed with a smile on my face.
Just then, Vestina and Amy had left, saying if I needed anything, I should use the bell-pull to call.
Really, it was as if someone had set up the perfect opportunity.
“Then, shall I go?”
Holding the teleportation stone, I closed my eyes, feeling a warm sensation enveloping me.
***
When I opened my eyes again, I was standing inside a cabin. On another day, I would have been outside the cabin, but today, it seemed like I unconsciously thought of the inside of the cabin because I didn’t have much time.
Thinking this, I looked around the inside of the cabin when suddenly I felt a sense of unease.
There was no sign of Ruth, who must have been surprised by my sudden arrival. He was not reading here like last time, nor did it seem like he was in the room.
“Is he not in the cabin?”
I murmured, taking in the seemingly empty interior of the cabin.
But I wasn’t as surprised as last time. If he wasn’t in the cabin, it was clear he would be by the lake, just like before.
I didn’t have enough time to wait for Ruth in the cabin, should I go out to look for him? Today wasn’t like a Wednesday when I had ample time; it was rushed, so I decided to head to the lake first and quickly made my way there.
But Ruth wasn’t there either. There were only flower petals fluttering down with the wind.
I had thought the lake was the most likely place to find Ruth, but not finding him there suddenly made me feel a slight anxiety. What if he was nowhere in this forest? The anxiety that he might have left without saying anything.
No way. That couldn’t be. Ruth wouldn’t have left without a word.
I tried to ignore the anxiety that was trying to consume me and this time, I went to the footpath we had walked together.
But there, too, I couldn’t find him. Unable to give up hope, I even went to the place where we had saved a baby fox together, but not a single strand of his dazzling platinum hair could be seen.
The anxiety, now too big to ignore, was suffocating.
Yet, the remaining hope kept moving my feet. Here, just in case, and there too, and lastly, for the off chance, I went to all the places where Ruth could possibly be, but he was nowhere to be found.
I eventually returned to the cabin without having found Ruth, completely engulfed by an uncontrollable anxiety.
Could Ruth have really left? But the last time we met, he didn’t say anything about leaving… And his injuries hadn’t fully healed yet.
All sorts of reasons for denying the ominous thought that he might have left the cabin came one after the other.
But all of them were baseless. Ruth had no need to inform me before leaving, nor had he ever said he would leave after his wounds had healed.
Realizing that made me want to cry, and I sat down in the armchair, hugging my knees tightly.
Curling up tightly and burying my forehead in my arms brought silence.
Then, the voice of Ruth lingering in my memories softly circled my ears before vanishing.
“Of course. The moment you became mine, I became yours.”
“…….”
Recalling what he had said to me before made me feel even more despondent. Words that had felt as sweet as walking on clouds when heard now seemed overly sweet like strawberry-flavored candy.
Clutching my knees tighter and biting my lower lip, I murmured softly,
“…You said I was yours.”
But if you said I was yours, why disappear without a word?
Swallowing the heavy, stone-like question made my chest tighten.
Even in this situation, an unextinguished ember of hope sparked positive thoughts. It’s too early to conclude he’s left, so let’s wait for Ruth in the cabin.
I knew all too well from experience that this hope was in vain.
Yet, unwilling to let go, I fixed my gaze on the sky outside the window and hypnotized myself with murmurs.
He’ll come by the time the sky turns deep blue.
He’ll come by the time the sky fills with orange light. He’ll come by the time the sky turns a beautiful amethyst purple.
…And that’s that.
However, soon the sky turned purple and eventually became navy blue, but still…
“Why, isn’t he coming?”
Ruth did not come.
As the sun disappeared and the moon rose high in the sky, I had to accept it.
That Ruth had left this place, and me.
***
Because it had already become a dim night, I could no longer kill time in the cabin.
Leaving behind my heart feeling as if it were empty, I returned to the mansion. Then, I weakly took a step towards the armchair to hide the mana stone again.
That was the moment.
“Seri.”
It was a voice that shouldn’t have been heard.
The mana stone I was holding fell to the ground with a clear sound due to being made of jewel, but I didn’t have the time to care about that.
“Ah, Father…”
The person sitting cross-legged in the armchair of my bedroom was none other than my father.
I don’t know if Father had come to my bedroom as soon as he returned to the mansion, but he was dressed exactly the same as when he went out this morning.
In the bedroom, darkened with only a bit of moonlight seeping through the window, my father’s green eyes alone shone with a aloof light, sharply gleaming.
As soon as I saw those intense eyes, I realized what I had done, being blinded by my feelings for Ruth.
Despite knowing I should return early since Father could come back at any time, I stayed out until this hour waiting for Ruth.
You’re crazy, Selena.
I clasped my hands and waited for the scolding to come from my father.
Seeing me like that, my father slowly rose from his seat and walked towards me with an expressionless face. Then, he silently picked up the magic stone that had fallen on the floor.
“Where did this magic stone come from?”
I flickered my mouth as I watched my father ask in a monotone voice, then responded in a barely audible voice.
“…Nanny bought it for me a while ago.”
“Right. Nanny bought it for you.”
Since the nanny was also my father’s nanny, he referred to her by her role rather than her name.
After hearing my answer, my father’s eyes seemed lost in thought, his focus blurring. Then, after a moment, he seemed to finish his thoughts and opened his mouth.
“Since when?”
Though the sentence had no subject, it wasn’t hard to understand.
I took a deep breath to hide the tremor in my voice and said,
“Since about six months ago.”
“It’s been quite a while.”
While rolling the small magic stone in his hand, my father asked further,
“Why did you go there?”
“At first, I just went out because I was curious about the outside… And later, I went out to gather funds because I wanted to see the sea.”
“If you wanted to see the sea, you could have just gone to the sea without having to gather funds.”
Hearing my father’s words, I moistened my dry throat.
It’s not that I hadn’t thought about that.
The reason I hadn’t gone through with it was that I didn’t know what the sea looked like. Who can say where they’ll end up if all they can imagine is a beach filled with blue water?
“I didn’t know what the sea looked like. I couldn’t picture the sea I’d only read about in words.”
“I see.”
My father nodded upon hearing my answer, his tone becoming heavier as he called my name.
“Seri.”
“Yes.”
“Is that really everything?”
“…”
My lips, slightly parted, pressed firmly together at the pointed question.
Had he realized there was another reason I had gone out of the mansion? Or had he known all along?
As I was pondering and looking into my father’s eyes, he let out a resigned laugh.
“You’re planning not to tell me the real reason why you went outside.”
“The real reason? What I told you is what I….”
“There was blood on your robe.”
“!”
It was father who had taken the robe.
I couldn’t keep my expression in check upon this shocking truth.
Seeing my reaction, father blinked as if he had expected it.
“Your blood is not red, so that blood must belong to someone else.”
Father continued, tucking my magic stone into his coat pocket. Then, for the first time, his expression slightly twisted.
“You’ve deceived this father for nearly half a year, Seri. In the end, I was the fool, constantly telling you not to go outside because it’s dangerous beyond our mansion.”
I hate the father