Chapter 19: I Hate, That’s Why I Exist
“Can we leave now, my lady?”
At Royza’s question, Lucifella nodded her head helplessly.
Royza looked at her Lucifella’s impression. Lucifella furrowed her eyebrows slightly and was sticking to a stiff expression on her face as if she felt uncomfortable.
She was contemplating how to make her lady feel better.
Carriage wheel rolled slowly and it was time to leave the city gate. A red curve was engraved on Lucifella’s lips in an instant.
“Fufu.”
She seemed to be trying to hold back her laughter, but she failed. But how can she stand it?
“My lady?”
Despite the call from Royza, she on burst out laughing.
It’s probably because her head has cooled down.
Upon her death, she lost both her body and her swordsmanship that symbolized Estelle. So Estelle doubted and suspicius her own existence. But there was only one thing she couldn’t doubt.
That is, she, herself who hates Khalid this much.
When she saw Khalid, her heart ached in that dim past, her heart beat in revenge, and her hate and hatred for him burned black.
How can Estelle not exist when such vivid emotions exist?
Estelle died and disappeared, and even if this was Estelle’s memory, Estelle was Estelle as long as she had these vivid emotions. She doesn’t disappear anywhere.
“Puhahaha!”
Why didn’t I know that simple fact! I talked to Khalid, felt a simmering emotion about him, and then realized it. I am Estelle. Estelle survives like this and she is placed in Lucifella’s body. I am Estelle. This was an immutable fact.
She will take revenge on Khalid. Because she’s Estelle. That was the reason that made Estelle is Estelle.
But in order to do that, first she had to become Lucifella.
Estelle, who was a knight, has to live as a lady named Lucifella.
Lucifella drew the curtains inside the carriage window. Then, the blue sky caught my eyes. It was when she was about to enjoy the realization she felt in herself.
“You look happy, my lady?”
“Yes.”
Royza seemed hesitant at Lucifella’s smile and asked.
“By the way, ‘at that time,’ what happened with the Duke?”
“Uh?”
“I’m sorry, I was waiting in the carriage and I heard the voice of the Duke.”
“What’s the matter with him? He’s just…..”
Lucifella’s face, who had spoken so indifferently, gradually turned white.
It was because that kiss was replayed in her head. She tries to kiss him as she pleases, and Zed comes kissing her. That’s what Zed said ‘behavior’ was.
She had completely forgotten. Lucifella held her skirt tightly until it wrinkled. It was such a big deal!
“Uh, how!”
How can I forget this? She even seduced him first and kissed him. Kiss. I haven’t even kissed properly. What confidence?
At that time, Zed’s expression, which was returning with an angry expression, came to mind. Fortunately, he seemed calm when they met again, but just because he was calm didn’t mean he wasn’t ashamed of her.
“Ah! Why did I do that?”
“What?”
Lucifella slammed her head into the window of the carriage. But Lucifella couldn’t raise her head in shame.
“I should have apologized at least….”
At Lucifella’s actions, Royza began to worry about her lady again. Isn’t she crazy? Please don’t be, Royza prayed and begged.
***
After seeing the carriage leaving, Zed got back on his horse. Eozif tried to catch up, but he coldly knocked out the Prince.
He was staring at the Duke of Louirk, Khalid. Khalid’s face, which had always smiled, was hardened. He raised the corners of his mouth.
His fiancée had a strange knack for screwing up someone he disliked. His mind was complicated, but seeing that face made him feel a little better.
I came here just in case I heard that Eozif had left the Imperial Palace, but it turns out well. Fortunately, nothing seems to happen, and Lucifella also looked fine, although her condition was a little strange.
‘She was too fine.’
So it was a problem!
Zed made a grimace. No, why is it okay? Can’t you remember?
“I should have apologized at least…..”
She was sick because he could not handle the aftermath of the loss of the crown prince. He rushed to kiss her in a state of madness.
Anyway, he knew that she took a picture of him and kissed him as a substitute for ‘being lonely’. He kissed her with the intention of teasing her a little, but he was unconsciously fascinated while kissing her.
No, no. ‘Thinking of making fun’ itself is wrong. Be honest. When Lucifella already smiled and seduced him, he had fallen for it.
If a sick person gives you 100 gold coins, and you take it, you’re a garbage. Bernard said so.
No matter how hard you try to stop a woman from coming, isn’t it normal to stop the sick woman? At that time, Zed came to his senses when he saw Lucifella surprised. He was angrier at himself than the sick Lucifella.
“Crazy.”
He still murmured. Strangely, however, the glittering eyes of the autumn banquet and dance came to mind more than the clumsy smile of temptation at that time.
At that time, I couldn’t remember what kind of clothes Lucifella wore. The eyes, those two eyes, were strangely memorable.
Like, yeah, like….
Like the eyes of Estelle Spert, the dead knight of Ersha.
“It’s crazy.”
How can you compare your fiancée to the great person who was a woman but became a knight? A job who have only one gender in common. He shook his head nervously.
Perhaps Estelle is the most deeply embedded human being in his mind, so she rarely gets out easily. And since she’s already dead, she’ll probably remain special forever.
Zed, who was thinking of Estelle, thought of Lucifella again. In any case, his fiancée, who had stimulated her strangely, was gone, and he was relieved.
Now, he just wanted to live quietly in his own estate without having an accident. He steered his horse towards the duke’s estate. He hopes he doesn’t get caught up in emotions he can’t control anymore.
***
The sound of footsteps stepping on the shiny marble echoed coolly in the hallway.
The man’s steps were unfamiliarly slow. He cleared his cravat with anxious eyes, looking at the appearance of the splendid hallway.
And at the moment before a certain visit to his destination, he sighed inaudibly. Because this invitation was not welcome.
From the narrow gap in the large door, golden light and a loud voice leaked out.
When he opened the door and went inside, he saw a young man sitting on a red chair in the middle.
At a glance, the young man sitting with his legs crossed in a relaxed posture was overflowing with his characteristic arrogance. His face had a twisted smile that was like a symbol.
The young man’s gaze turned to the man that just entered. His face brightened.
“Come here, uncle!”
“Greetings to Your Highness the crown prince.”
Temir shook his head when the visitor, Count Aydin, tried to bend down.
“What kind of greeting is it between us?”
Temir shook his hand affectionately and pointed to a chair right next to the seat where he was sitting.
“Come here.”
It is the seat next to the crown prince. Usually, his uncle, Duke Idris, sat next to him, but today for some reason, the seats were different. When he looked at the Duke of Idris as if he were reading his face, he nodded as if he would allow it.
“Sit down.”
Count Aydin sat down. Looking around, he saw the Second Knights in a dark purple uniform.
“Are you busy with jewelry mining?”
“It’s about a small mine. What’s so busy about it?”
The Prince smiled at the Count’s words. A small jewel mine was found in one of the twin mountains in the land of the Count of Aydin. The mine, which was neither small nor large, enriched the poor Count.
“But I’m always reassured that uncle is helping me financially.”
“It is natural to you, Your Highness. Although it is a small mine, it will definitely help.”
The calm words raised the crown prince’s lips. Temir said, shaking his legs according to his habit, resting his chin on his arm.
“Uncle, did Lucy go down to the estate?”
“Yes.”
“That’s too bad. I wanted to see her face even for a moment on the way.”
“…..”
“I think it’s a wise choice. There’s no point in staying in the capital even if there’s a rumor that you’re crazy. She’ll only be a laughing stock.”
He looked down at the Count and said. Others sitting in the room burst into small laughter as if sympathizing with him. Nevertheless, the count’s expression remained unchanged.
“Poor thing, it must have been very hard. Well, it’s not too much. But I’m not going to forget.”
He chuckled. Then a woman’s scream was heard. Knights of the Second Knights were dragging a woman. The woman with the maid’s uniform was shaking. Count Aydin looked puzzled.
“Oh, I’m sorry. The maid broke the bowl in front of me when she said she would bring the tea. This is what physical punishment should be.”
The maid was a beautiful woman with black hair like night. Count Aydin’s face hardened when he saw it. No wonder it was uncomfortable. It’s like…. No, that must be an illusion. Count Aydin shook his head.
“Please watch too, Uncle! Because this is my little entertainment.”
Temir, who was giggling, raised his hand and lowered it as if he was signaling.
“Sa- please save me! Save me!”
At that, her maid clasped her hand and begged. However, Temir’s expression did not change.
He was originally a person who liked to abuse people below him, especially women.
After all, today must have been a bad day for the crown prince. Count Aydin tried to clear his face and looked around at the people around him.
The Duke of Idris was looking blankly at the maid, the Count of Barband looked terrified, and the Count of Poere was smiling funny and openly, expressing sadistic excitement.
Soon after, the second knights raised the whip with expressionless faces and punished the maid. A whip that cuts through the air hit the woman’s slender body.
“Argh! Save me, save me!”
The maid cried. A strong whip was struck mercilessly. That one time alone tore the maid’s clothes.
Once again, the woman was whipped. It wasn’t long before blood began to splatter.
“Harder!”
Temir’s face was grotesquely distorted by sadism.
“Uncle, do you see it? Look at that weird thing! Afterwards, she will sound like a beast!”
Temir’s green eyes gleaming with excitement as he looked at the poorly beaten maid. The whip sounded even stronger, and the maid was now being beaten without saying a word.
For a long time since then, only the moaning of a dying woman rang out in the reception room of the crown prince’s Palace.
Temir turned his head and looked up at Count Eidin, right next to him. Count Aydin was embarrassed by him. The snake-like eyes flashed with joy, as if to observe the count’s reaction.
Count Aydin tried to hide his confused expression and watched the black-haired maid being beaten. Then he realized that Khalid Louirk was not here. He was usually a person who showed up at these meetings.
Where will you be? His eyes moved to the maid, who was being beaten with anxiety. As the Prince had said, the maid was no longer making a human-sounding sound, but a beast howling.
“Next time, I’ll show you something more fun. Aren’t you excited?”
The Count sighed inside, saying that the crown prince was about to start again.
***
“Is she sleeping?”
“She’s sleeping.”
Viscount Matsy, the estate manager, looked at Royza and said. He shrugged and sighed.
Lucifella dozed off in the carriage for several days on the way to the estate, and collapsed as soon as she arrived at the estate. After almost ten years, he had decorated the estate while waiting for the lady to come to the Count’s estate.
“But, well, now she’s sleeping comfortably now.”
“Has she never been? When I see her sleeping now, she always seem to sleep well.”
Royza shook her head and said.
“My lady hasn’t able to sleep well since the accident.”
When she was sick or not, her eyebrows were frowned when she looked closely at Lucifella’s expression. It was as if she didn’t want to sleep.
“But it’s good that my lady sleep deeply this time.”
Although there was a slight fever, Lucifella was sleeping with a comfortable face. Just like before.
“I hope my lady like this estate.”
“My lady will like it.”
Viscount Matsy wondered at Royza’s conviction. This is because the lady he had observed was sure to hate this place.
‘I heard you lost your memory, but your personality must have changed a lot.’
As for the calm appearance of the maids attending, there seemed to be no major problems than he thought.
“Oh~, I slept well!
Lucifera, who was stretching her back, grabbed her waist with moan. This is because she stretched her body so hard that she heard a clatter from my waist.
This body was so fragile that it was a miracle that she survived when she met the murderer.
It was so frustrating to be in the carriage that she decided to ride a horse when she got used to it later, but she eventually failed. This is because this body was too weak to handle a long carriage trip.
So Lucifella was almost half dead when she arrived. She couldn’t afford to know what estate looked like or what the castle was like.
She just wanted to finish quickly and sleep comfortably in bed.
‘If Liam sees this, he will laugh.’
It was not a forced march that stayed up all three days and nights and rode horses, but it was only a carriage trip and she almost collapsed.
Lucifella sighed. I think I slept for almost three days. Lucifella got up with a throbbing pat on the waist.
As she became more comfortable, her sleep naturally increased. Once her own identity became clear, she became naturally accommodating to the rest this body required.
Lucifella looked around the room. Unlike the splendid mansion, this place was certainly a simple place. It was very different from the mansion where my eyes hurt because it was shining.
Whatever they said, they prepared in haste when she said that she was coming, so the quilt was on the gorgeous side, but somehow the whole landscape of the castle was clumsy.
She rose from her bed. I felt refreshed. I’ll be sick again in a little walk anyway.
When Lucifella opened the door and went outside, the maids ran in surprise.
“Ah, my lady!”
“My lady!”
The maids in the castle were completely different from the maids Lucifella had seen as a child.
Wait? What do you mean by ‘completely different maids’? Lucifella’s memory at the castle seemed to appear again.
“Oh, my God, my lady!”
The maids from the capital rushed to her side, overtaking the maids of the castle, and surrounding Lucifella.
What is it? When Lucifera tilted her head and saw the maids, the maids were making an unknowing wink. It was just like seeing the struggles of the knights.
The knights selected in the capital and the knights selected by small local nobles were of course, different in price, but the knights of the famous knight families said that their level was not different from that of the elite knights in the capital.
Anyway, it’s the same here and there. Lucifella shook her head.
***
Thank you for reading!
