VWTBS chapter 19

[– Something is wrong (III) –]

 

I was in darkness.

It could be called the primordial darkness, or perhaps the abyss of the void.

It was a space that seemed explainable by all the words in the world, yet not explainable by any.

Crouched alone, I was merely consumed by the pitch-black darkness.

Time seemed to pass—perhaps a long while, or maybe just a moment.

At some point, someone spoke soundlessly.

[―Bearer of the Wick of Delusion. What is your name?]

The Wick of Delusion. Could it refer to the “Ring of Delusion” dismantled from the Lily of Delusion (Lily of Enchantment)?

If so, the bearer of the Wick of Delusion must be me.

“Senephin Cromwell…”

With a voice barely audible, I managed to state the name.

But immediately, the soundless entity asked again.

[That is the avatar you use to blend into this world. What is your true name?]

True…. name..?

Something like that….

[The name from your world. Your true name.]

My world. Earth. Korea.

As soon as that thought crossed my mind, chills ran down my neck.

An inexplicable nausea welled up inside me.

[Your name.]

The soundless entity pressed on, resolute, disregarding my condition.

My name. I must have had a name in Korea…….

……What was my name?

The nausea worsened, and tears streamed down as I struggled to suppress it.

Unconsciously, I let out a choking sound, but no noise seemed to carry through the darkness.

Finally, a faint hum from far away echoed, [Mental reinforcement, protection…] buzzing in the distance and then I lost consciousness once again.

The first thing I heard was the sound of crying.

Sniffling, sobbing, and wailing voices intertwined, drifting through the air.

I tried moving my arm slightly. Slowly, my head began to clear. I opened my eyes gradually.

“…Ah…”

A chandelier-adorned ceiling came into view, blurry at first. I blinked a few times and turned my head toward the source of the crying.

Burying their face into the bed, their silver hair quivered, revealing only the crown of their head. I knew who it was.

“…Jin…?”

“Ah!!!”

He suddenly lifted his head. That divinely beautiful face was a heartbreaking mess, with his eyes and nose swollen beyond recognition. His cheeks were streaked with tears.

“Senephin… Senephin!!!!”

The young man, in his youthful form, hugged me so tightly I could hardly breathe.

“Where…is this…?”

“This is our residence. Are you alright? Does your head hurt? I couldn’t call for anyone, and at a time like this, Lumins isn’t here..”

I was about to answer that I was fine, but his mention of one word made my heart sink. I opened my mouth, trembling.

“Lumins.. isn’t here?”

Jin looked slightly troubled before answering.

“There was a bit of an incident. For now, you should focus on resting, Senephin…”

“Lumins isn’t hurt or anything, right?!”

Since I had left traces of mana toward the Spelo royal palace, they all must have rushed here.

But what if Lumines, trying to help me, got caught up in the curse of the spirit of darkness? What if it was a death flag I didn’t see coming? My mind was in chaos.

“Ah.. no, it’s nothing like that. Calm down, Senephin. No one was hurt.”

Even though his own face was a mess from crying, Jin spoke in the gentlest voice he could muster, as if to reassure me.

“Lumins had an urgent matter to attend to and left for a bit. Velkina and I have been taking turns nursing you. She just completely exhausted herself and is resting in the next room.”

Velkina, the same person who had cried and worried over me when I fell into the lake. I didn’t even have to see it to know how devastated she must have been.

“Make sure to show her a healthy face later. She’s been so worried about you that she’s barely eaten or drunk anything.”

“…I will. I’m sorry…”

“Don’t apologize.. That’s something we should be saying to you…”

Once again, tears streamed down Jin’s cheeks, trailing down and dripping off his jaw, dampening his silver hair.

“For two whole days, you didn’t wake up.. Everyone was overcome with despair. There was even talk that you might never wake up again.”

“…. So it was that serious.”

“Yes. It’s a relief that you’ve opened your eyes, but we don’t know if there might be any aftereffects. We should call someone to check on you. Since I can’t leave, I’ll wake Velkina and…”

I was about to say, “I’m fine, so let Velkina rest,” when the door suddenly opened as if to interrupt me.

“That’s enough, Jin. I’ll check.”

“Ah…”

A somewhat gaunt face, purple hair that hadn’t been neatly groomed as usual, and golden eyes that looked tired.

Lumins entered the room with an expressionless face.

Normally, this would be the moment I’d internally cheer, “Wow, it’s Lumins with a deep, serious look!” but my heart felt unbearably heavy. I knew why Lumins looked like that.

“Jin, get some rest. Even beastmen can harm their bodies if they go without sleep like that.”

“…You’re not exactly one to talk, though.”

“I’ll get some sleep after I check on Senephin’s condition. Go now.”

Jin left the room after ruffling my hair one last time and telling me to rest well. I silently watched Jin’s retreating figure for a moment. Then, as if to take over, Lumins sat down on the chair beside the bed where Jin had been.

“Excuse me for a moment.”

Lumins grabbed my wrist, then pressed briefly on areas like my forehead and neck, as if checking something. His actions were purely clinical, to the point where I barely registered the fact that he was touching me.

It felt like an icy wind was blowing around me. Unable to endure the oddly cold atmosphere mostly due to Lumins auras, so I break the silence and ask. 

“…Uh, um. Jin said you had to leave because of some business. Is that true…?”

“Just some things here and there. Investigating or handling matters in cooperation with the royal family’s requests. I just finished one of those tasks.”

After saying that, Lumins withdrew his hand and nodded.

“The mana circulation is fine. We’ll need to keep monitoring, but.. other than fatigue, you seem to be in normal condition.”

“Ah– yes! Please don’t worry about me. From what Jin said earlier, you haven’t been able to sleep either, have you? Please get some rest…”

“How could I possibly sleep?”

At the resentful tone in his voice, I widened my eyes. Lumins averted his gaze, as if realizing his slip.

“…. No. Forget it. Don’t mind me. What’s important is that you get more rest. I’ll cast a sleep spell for you.”

“That’s…”

Before I could respond, Lumins began murmuring a spell in a low voice. His tone, rougher and more scraped than usual, resonated like a lullaby, almost deceptively soothing.

“W-wait… Lumins.”

“What is it?”

“You see. Lumins, I’m really okay.”

I couldn’t explain it clearly, but I felt like I had to say I was okay. Lumins looked anything but fine, and I thought it might help to reassure him if only just a little.

“I’m very strong! Sturdy! I’m even a little hungry, and I’m sure after sleeping, I’ll be able to eat just fine!”

“Senephin…”

“So, um.. please forgive me. I’m really sorry for making everyone worry.”

At my words, Lumins eyes widened. Then, furrowing his brow, he shook his head.

“That’s not true, Senephin. The fault lies with me for not being by your side during such a dangerous time. Me, Velkina, Jin… we all feel deeply responsible.”  

“No, that’s not…”  

“….Even so, despite feeling that way…”  

He bit his lip and lowered his gaze.  

“Why did you go to a place like the forest on the outskirts of the capital? You told me you were going to buy a gift. Why was there a magic spirit there? Those creatures don’t intrude into human society. Why was the last person you were seen with Yugo Faynance? …Senephin.”  

Luminis poured out these questions in a single breath, then lifted his head again.  

“…. There’s something I’ve always wanted to ask you.”  

“What… is it?”  

“Senephin…”  

He swallowed as if hesitating, then asked in a quiet voice. 

“…..Are you.. hiding some kind of secret from us? From me?”  

I flinched without meaning to. Lumins didn’t point it out, he simply looked at me with empty eyes.  

A secret? Of course, there is one.  

This world is just the setting of a game I used to play. You’re all characters from that game. And because of that, I know the future.  

A crazy-sounding secret, and no one would believe.

“……Tha-, That’s……”

“You can’t tell me?”

“……… Yes.”

“That’s your….”  

In the quiet room where even the sound of breathing feels loud, he parts his lips and asks. 

“―Is it related to your identity?”  

I widened my eyes and looked at Lumins. At that moment, I was at a loss for words.  

He was silently shedding tears. Without any thought of wiping them away, he let the tears fall, crying quietly.  

Even while playing the game, even after coming here, I had never once seen Lumins cry. He had always been strong, composed, and, in some way, mysterious that kind of person.  

―You know, I used to be very weak and timid. I cried a lot, too.  

The words Lumins had said in the Valley of Delusion suddenly came to mind.  

I wanted to somehow stop his tears. Though his crying face was breathtakingly beautiful, and the idea of storing this moment in my mind’s memorial album crossed my thoughts, I pushed away such nonsense. I didn’t want him to cry.  

“Well.. It’s not like my identity is anything grand, and it’s hard to explain. There’s a lot I feel sorry about because of it, but if the day ever comes when I can explain…”  

I rambled, spilling words without knowing what I was even saying.  

Lumins shook his head. With a tear-streaked face, he looked at me and smiled.  

―That expression, oddly enough, looked happier than any face of Lumins I had ever seen before.  

“It’s okay even if you don’t say anything. I―”  

Perhaps the effects of the sleep magic were kicking in because my eyelids felt heavy.  

“Just meeting you again is enough for me.”  

With those words lingering in my ears, I fell back into sleep as if fainting.