Karnov came into the room, arguing with Asha, and only then did he set her down on the bed. Asha glared at him, then spun around on the bed and flopped down.
“Are you better now, Lord Karnov?”
“A little bit.”
Asha pursed her lips and drummed her toes on the bed, somewhat agitated.
“But why did they come here in the first place?”
“Well…”
Neither Asha nor Karnov believed Ivan and Yelizay’s words straight away. If the concern was genuine, they would have visited sooner. Asha, lost in thought, suddenly sat up.
“I don’t care why they’re here, I don’t…”
Karnov waited for Asha to continue her words. She hesitated, pursing her lips again, then shrugged her shoulders.
“Asha?”
Asha turned her back to Karnov’s call. For some reason, it was difficult to speak face to face.
“There’s people I don’t like too.”
“Who?”
“I… I hate all the people who look at Karnov like that.”
“How do my parents look at me?”
Asha turned her head again and looked at Karnov and repeatedly opened and closed her lips.
They look at him like he’s taken something from them. They want to drag him down to where they are. They want him to be broken and frustrated, even though he’s their child. How could they do that?
But Asha lowered her head deeply and murmured her answer.
“They’re scared…”
There were many other words she swallowed, but she held them back, even though it would have been so cathartic to shout out that they were evil for having such feelings. She didn’t want to say it if it hurt Karnov.
Karnov shrugged.
“They’re all scared of me.”
“Not everyone.”
Asha affirmed.
“Alyosha isn’t scared of Karnov. The imperial officers aren’t scared. Natasha and Lyuda are not scared. I’m not scared of Karnov either.”
“Asha, you really don’t seem to be afraid.”
Asha glared, and Karnov laughed a little.
“I… I don’t think you ever talked about your parents.”
Asha pursed her lips. She had never heard from Karnov that he hated them or that he was hurt. Karnov had never said anything he shared with them. There was nothing.
“You don’t have to tell me. I told you I know everything just by looking at Karnov’s face, right? I can tell by the look on everyone else’s face.”
“Hmm. I guess there are some things you don’t know.”
Karnov’s laughter grew a little louder as Asha became angry as if she had heard something unreasonable. When a natural silence was established between the two, Karnov quietly broke the silence.
“What do you want to do?”
“What do you mean, what do I want to do…?”
“Eating your snacks makes people nice.”
Karnov said jokingly. Asha noticed what Karnov was talking about. He was asking her if she wanted his parents to reconcile with him if they ate a lot of snacks.
Asha took a big breath.
“To be honest.”
Asha felt like she was going to cry a little bit. She wished she could get a clearer picture of what Karnov thought of his parents and how he felt, but she couldn’t.
All the currents Karnov felt and thought were concentrated on one person. On Asha herself. During their time together, it wasn’t clear what he thought or felt about others.
The colors he emitted during his time with her had been gentle and warm all day. Even when he saw a rude person from time to time, he just got determined to protect her. The friendly air currents always wrapped around her.
Even earlier, at the moment of welcoming Karnov’s parents.
Asha thought it would be nice if Karnov had no interest in them. It would be nice if he had not been hurt by their eyes and actions enough not to even hate them.
If he hadn’t turned them away when he’d been told they were coming, it wasn’t because he cared what they did, but because he didn’t care about it anyway…
“To be honest…”
Asha dabbed her lips.
Everyone is born with a cup. Someone will have warm tea or cocoa or sweet lemonade in it, and someone may be born with an empty cup.
And someone is born with a glass of salt water, just like he was a long time ago. What do you do with a glass of salt water given to a thirsty person?
A thirsty person would be desperate, even if the water was not salt but poison. You know you shouldn’t drink it, and you hate it, dislike it, don’t want to see it, but you can’t help it.
So her mouth didn’t fall open, even though she knew it was her job to tell him to put it down, even though she knew in the back of her mind that he wasn’t actually thirsty.
Because there was a time when she couldn’t throw away that poisonous salt water…
In the end, Asha spoke quickly in a tone that was loud yet whispered softly.
“Actually, I don’t want to give them snacks. I don’t want to give them anything. I just want them to go away and never see Karnov again.”
She want to say how could a parent do that to their child, but there were people like that in the world.
To give love, you must have something. Those who were empty inside were bound to give nothing to others or to give the wrong thing. Things like fragments of themselves that were torn down or lumps that rotted and stank in empty spaces.
For those people, their child will not be loved either. They’re just a possession that will fill their empty self. So if the possession doesn’t go their way, they get angry, hate, and destroy it. Like throwing a broken toy in a fit of rage.
“…Make up… I thought you’d want me to do it.”
“What? Why? Do you want to do that?”
“No, I meant that I thought you would.”
Karnov, slowly, after a brief respite, mentioned Prince Valery.
At that, Asha shook her head as if it were nonsense. How can they put a crooked person who wants to hurt and destroy others in the same case as someone who wants to be loved but cannot?
If you are crooked because you want to receive love and attention, you will be different if you fill that love and interest. But what about someone who is twisted because they want to hurt and destroy others, but can’t?
Why should their needs be fulfilled?
Asha bit her lips and said.
“I don’t like them…”
Karnov stared at her as she whispered with all her might. His eyes held an emotion that was hard to describe. Then he answered quietly.
“…Me neither.”
The girl looked up in surprise.
“Karnov too? What?”
“I don’t like it either.”
“Really?”
Karnov nodded. So far, it didn’t really matter. Any wounds that might have been left from his childhood had healed in other ways, and he let them go because neither their eyes nor their hearts nor anything else touched him.
That’s why he’d stripped them of their titles when they’d crossed the line, because he didn’t care how they saw him, what they thought, what they said.
But…
Watching the girl grumbling, “I hate those people so much,” with a relieved look on her face when he said he didn’t like it, brought back memories of when she was ten years old.
The day the Noctis Elves had come to the capital to make a peace agreement, and she had covered him at the feast. The girl who had tried to shield him from the prying eyes of the people.
Karnov realized that leaving them alone would hurt her more than it would hurt him. The girl had a look on her face that said she couldn’t bear to see him hurt.
“Ah…”
“Karnov?”
On a day when he was younger, he had an idea when he saw the girl in front of him.
This girl seemed to be made up of sugar, cream, peach blossoms, finely crushed pearl pieces and emeralds steeped in water, sunlight sparkling on snow, fresh pebbles under clear stream water covered in blue moss, and small acorns left behind by squirrels.
It seemed as if she were made only of soft, gentle, dazzling, and beautiful things in the world.
But he was wrong. Karnov realized.
The reason she seemed to glow was not just because she was made up of beautiful things, but because deep within her, there was a burning passion.
━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━
Karnov’s parents had a separate dinner under the pretext of being tired, and within a few minutes they said they would go back the next day.
Asha grumbled as she headed to the warehouse where the cat was, carrying feed for the cat. In a voice so small that it would not be heard by Constantin, who was a little ahead with the lantern.
“It’s strange, traveling all this way and then going back in a day.”
Karnov also nodded with an expression of agreement at Asha’s words. Asha frowned.
“At first, I suspected it might be because of Prasti.”
Given their connection to the healer who had cured Lyudmila, it was suspicious to say the least that the beast who had eaten Prasti would return to the estate where they had done the deed.
What do they mean they’re going back all of a sudden?
“What am I supposed to do with the Prasti that’s already almost purified? Huh?”
Asha trailed off, her eyes narrowing. A rumbling sound came from the far side of the warehouse, and a black shadow quickly left the warehouse.
“…Didn’t I tell you to increase the security at the warehouse?”
“Yes, I specifically ordered it to be guarded at night, but…”
The guard was nowhere to be seen. The moment the three realized what had happened, they quickly ran toward the warehouse. When they burst open the door, they found a normal-sized, if slightly fat, tricolored cat lying in a cage. It was spitting up blood.
“What the…!”
While Constantin was stunned, Asha hurriedly approached the cage, but the cat did not move despite the loud noise.
“Meow!”
Phoebe also flew up in a hurry to look at the cat.
<It’s been poisoned! At least it’s still breathing.>
<Poor thing.>
Constantin found the key with his trembling hands and opened the door of the cage. Asha also went inside without hesitation, but she couldn’t touch the cat. She was afraid that if she did, something would be wrong with the cat forever.
Standing in front of the cage door to stop her, Karnov glanced around the warehouse and quickly ordered Constantin.
“Constantin, search for the missing guard and the intruder with poison immediately. We don’t know their intentions, so we must be careful. And fetch the healer.”
“Yes!”
The moment Constantin was about to run, Karnov added.
“Constantin. Keep in mind that they may not be an intruder.”
“…Yes!”
Asha, meanwhile, was reaching for and pulling away from the cat.
“Oh, what should I do? Do you have any antidote? No, isn’t antidote poisonous to cats?”
<If you touch him, you can give him some first aid…>
“Me, me?”
<Poison doesn’t work on those who have a pact with a powerful spirit. If you give him that power, he will be able to withstand it. It helps that it’s a small fiend that hasn’t vomited up its Prasti yet.>
“Asha, wait…”
As soon as she heard the words, Asha quickly scooped the limp cat into her arms. Her clothes were stained with the cat’s vomit and dirt.
“That’s right, so cold medicine is no use to me either.”
Asha tried to joke and pet the cat carefully. It was a desperate touch to wake it up somehow. Shortly after stroking like that, the cat began to wriggle.
“Meow, open your eyes, will you?”
As soon as Asha whispered and patted him along the back from the top of the cat’s head, the cat opened its eyes as if he had heard it. Then he began to struggle recklessly and scratch around him.
<Meoow!>
“Asha!”
<Asha! You, you silly cat! Asha! Let go of her, you idiot!>
“It’s okay, it’s okay!”
Karnov tried to pull the cat away from Asha, but Asha shook her head and held onto it firmly, trying to stroke its back in a series of soothing motions. It didn’t matter that the cat’s nails scratched her shoulder and arm.
