Episode 62: Ghost Estate, A New Beginning For Three People.
“Muriel…”
“Ah, Ondal. I’m here.”
Upon hearing Ondal’s trembling voice, Muriel reflexively poured pacio into the piece of Ur.
She intended to cast a healing spell to rid herself of the unpleasant chill that lingered on her body. But the recovery magic didn’t work, and Ondal, who had been searching for her, let out a faint scream.
“What are you doing, Muriel! And then… and then you…”
“Ondal! Ondal! I’m fine. You know that, my pacio keeps coming back…”
“Muriel!”
Muriel quickly approached Ondal to reassure him, but he screamed again and tears streamed down his face. It was the first time she had seen such a hysterical appearance of him, whom she thought was always gentle and calm.
“Stop it! Take care of yourself!”
“But…!”
Muriel tried to explain once again that there was absolutely no need to worry, but August grabbed her, preventing her from speaking. Then he firmly shook his head, as if to say that no matter what she said, it wouldn’t be heard.
Phew.
Muriel drained her strength from the piece of Ur that had opened Sharan’s eyes and let out a deep sigh.
“…I’m really okay. Ondal…”
Ondal couldn’t calm his sorrowful sobbing for a long time. Thick streams of tears fell incessantly from his pale jaw, and he trembled as if he could collapse at any moment, making Muriel feel terribly sorry for him.
⚜ ⚜ ⚜
A quiet dinner passed.
Ondal said he wanted to be alone and entered the carriage. He didn’t show his face.
August heard about Muriel’s infinite pacio and accepted why she was calm even after meeting the demon, but he shook his head at the idea of pacio being able to regenerate infinitely. There is nothing in the world that doesn’t wither, and the breath of God cannot be an exception. Muriel must be mistaken about something.
Muriel thought August’s words made sense.
It was something she was capable of completely misunderstanding.
However, she couldn’t be sure if her thoughts were a misconception or true at the moment.
–AAAA
The chilling screams of the monsters’ crying endlessly without getting tired were annoying, but this was a peaceful night that she hadn’t experienced in a long time. August fell asleep soundly for the first time in a while, and the crackling sound of the firewood burning in the bonfire warmed and calmed her heart.
There was a very careful sound of the carriage door opening, and then gentle, neat steps crept up and stopped besides Muriel. Ondal liked being close together as long as it didn’t involve direct contact. As if compensating for the time he had spent alone all his life, he always nestled close to Muriel, as if he could breathe comfortably only then.
“Aren’t you hungry?”
Shakes head.
“Did you keep crying?”
Shakes head.
“…That’s a lie. I heard you sniffling continuously.”
“…I’m sorry.”
“I was worried. You know I won’t become a demon… because my pacio keeps replenishing.”
“…I’m… sorry for getting angry.”
Angry, he says. In Muriel’s eyes, the only thing she could see was him scared and pleading. Ondal had nothing to apologize for.
“Actually, the demon didn’t take any of my Pacio. I’ve been thinking about it, and it might be because of the fragment of Ur that’s embedded in my Pacio. I couldn’t tell August, though.”
If Kaiton came to the Ghost Estate, she had more questions to ask him.
“…Then it’s really okay?”
“Yeah. No problem.”
“…Never… do that again. If Muriel gets hurt or dies… I…I won’t be able to bear it.”
Ondal was wearing the large cloak he received from August to cover his eyes. He was also hugging his knees and crouching, so he looked like a hamster in a cape.
Muriel raised her hand very slowly over the cloak. If she’d found the right spot, her hand should be in the correct position. Ondal flinched and stiffened, but he didn’t avoid her hand. It seemed like he could bear it a little if she didn’t touch his bare skin.
“Are you telling me not to help my friend? That’s going to be difficult.”
“…Please…! I… I can’t rely on the moon alone anymore.”
The trembling of Ondal’s hand was transmitted through their joined hands.
“I only see Muriel now, day and night… What should I do if, if Muriel isn’t here? I absolutely won’t be able to stand it. I… I can’t even breathe alone. I don’t know how.”
“Ondal…”
Ondal held Muriel’s hand tightly, like a drowning man grasping on the grass.
It seemed like his powerful grip would be too much for her hand to withstand, but she didn’t stop him. Muriel just kept whispering softly, “I’m fine. I haven’t gone anywhere. I’m right here.”
While she’d given him the name of the moon herself.
Ondal seemed to see Muriel as his new moon.
As a friend in that small prison, it was a presence that he gave his heart to, relied on, and gave him a reason to live and the strength to endure.
“I was scared. I was so scared that Muriel would disappear. That’s why I was afraid I would be left alone in the darkness again. Sniff… Sniff… Please. Promise me that you won’t throw yourself to save me again. Promise me that you won’t die… Promise me.”
“I promise.”
Muriel lied, but Ondal, who was facing a person directly for the first time, believed her words easily. To lock him up, take away friendship, love, ordinary life, joy, adventure, happiness, passion… Sharan Kasal, who took away all the precious things in life from him, could not be called human, so Muriel was the first person he met.
Muriel swallowed her bitter saliva and the sting she felt and held Ondal’s hand. If Ondal saw her as the moon, she was willing to become the moon without hesitation. She believed she didn’t deserve his affection. But if it could help Ondal endure, she willingly and firmly wanted to become the moon that supported him.
And as time passed, when he regained his normal life, socialized with people, and found someone precious, she wanted to return to her rightful place and become his friend.
“I want to see if Muriel is really okay… with my own eyes.”
“Oh… really? How… can I help with that?”
This time, Muriel calmly waited for his next words without doing anything immature that upset Ondal like letting him use Sharan’s eyes at will. The night was when Ondal could finally open his eyes. Did that mean it was okay to his eyes now?
“Can you close your eyes for me?”
“Like this?”
“Yes.”
“Don’t open your eyes.”
“Okay.”
Since the bonfire set up to warm their bodies was large, even with closed eyes, she could faintly see the flames flickering between her eyelids. But… it felt a little strange to see them silently keeping her eyes closed, without saying anything. She felt a bit… awkward.
“Muriel, why are you trembling?”
“…Uh, I’m just a little cold.”
“Because of the demon?Y-You said it’s okay…”
“I’m just cold! I was just a little surprised back there. You don’t need to worry.”
Muriel quickly added before Ondal panicked again.
“Muriel… Am I not repulsive?”
“What?!”
“Don’t open your eyes…!”
Muriel glared at him as if to scold him, but when she saw him quickly bowing his head, she realized her mistake and quickly closed her eyes. It was a reflexive reaction, she’d never intended to open her eyes with an excuse.
“Sorry… I, I didn’t see. Really. I was startled because of your weird words!”
“….”
“I’m sorry. It was a genuine mistake. Ondal…? Are you angry?”
“Muriel… Can you… cover your eyes a bit?”
“What?!”
Muriel roared again, but this time, unlike before, she could only see Ondal’s two hands covering her field of vision.
Darn…
Ondal was completely out of touch, just stretching his arms.
“Q-quickly close your eyes…!”
Ondals’ red blushing face, turning his head shyly, could be seen through the gaps between his hands. However, he cleverly blocked Muriel’s view, and his unique eyes were not visible this time.
“I closed them.”
“…If you cover your eyes, Muriel, I’ll be able to see your face in more detail…”
Although Ondal’s usual attitude was humble and timid, he expressed what he wanted quite straightforwardly and honestly.
Usually, it wouldn’t bother her, but in this case, she found it a bit cheeky.
“Well, you should figure that out on your own. I’m closing my eyes, so why are you so concerned?”
Even though Muriel knew it was childish, she couldn’t completely hide her disappointment. The idea of using his weakened state as an opportunity to look at his eyes crept up, but she pushed it down.
“I… I thought Muriel was feeling cold…”
“What does that have to do with me closing my eyes, seriously.”
“W-well, my hand… I, I warmed it up for you…”
“What’s that supposed to mean? Keep talking.”
“What else should I say…”
When she heard Ondal’s embarrassed voice, Muriel’s lips involuntarily curled up.
“Keep going with what you were going to say. What were you planning to do while I had my eyes closed?”
“Huh?” Muriel teased, but she could still feel the pure trembling in Ondal’s voice. In fact, she had managed to shake off the unpleasant and sticky sensation left by the demon. Talking with Ondal warmed her heart little by little and brought her peace of mind.
“If M-Muriel doesn’t find it… disgusting for me to touch her…can I hold your hand?”
“Will you be holding it?”
Ondal’s nod seemed like a habitual response. It wasn’t until frustrated Muriel urged him that he let out a small exclamation as if realizing his mistake and quietly replied, “Yes.”
“Tie it. It’s okay to tie it tightly so it doesn’t slip off. Do you want me to tie your hand too? I don’t mind.”
“That… that’s okay.”
Snap, snap.
Muriel could feel Ondal’s cautious touch tying the cloth at the back of her head.
The collar of his cloak brushed softly against her cheeks.
He had only come a little closer than usual, but Muriel was surprised by the warmth of Ondal’s embrace.
August had made a much larger bonfire for Muriel, who was feeling cold, but it was at that moment when the last trace of chill melted away.
“Are you done?”
“Yeah…”
“Which side should I hold? Should I hold both hands?”
“Uh, just one hand.”
“Okay. I’m right-handed, so I’ll hold your right hand. What hand is your dominant one?”
“…I don’t know.”
Ah…
“I… I wish I were left-handed. Then we could hold each other’s less dominant hand… and carry it every day.”
As if reaching for a grand dream, Ondal’s cautious hand touched Muriel’s trembling right hand.
She wanted to playfully grab it, but she couldn’t. His hand was too tense. It was trembling with such intensity that she couldn’t even tease him as a joke.
“It’s warm.”
Muriel whispered quietly, concealing a bitter smile.
“Thank you, Ondal.”
For having the courage.
BABY STEPS AAA
Thanks! What the hecc is this cuteness, urgh, MY HEART! freaking cute, ship ship ship!
I am no better than Ur. I wanna see Ondal cry but I also would like to hug him so bad he is adorable 😭