The Reason Why She Wanted To Leave

“Madam, it’s all done.”

Rivet’s hands finally finished their work. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and saw that I appeared more beautiful than usual. Rivet’s skill was exceptional, and I was always satisfied with her work.

“Thank you, Rivet.”

She smiled brightly and bowed. I glanced at my face in the mirror once more. I was on my way to see my grandfather after a long time, and I didn’t want to appear less than my best. Seeing me like this would only cause him pain. He was already unwell, and I didn’t want to add to his worries.

After tidying my hair, I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

“Let’s go.”

With Rivet and a few other maids accompanying me, I got into the carriage. After about 20 minutes, we arrived at the Graham estate. The guard at the entrance recognized me and greeted me.

“Madam, …I apologize. That was a mistake.”

The guard, startled by his own use of “Madam,” quickly apologized. I gave him a gentle smile and nodded.

“Be more careful next time.”

“Yes, Lady Marves. You may enter.”

It wasn’t surprising that the guard made a mistake with the title. I had lived as the lady of this house for over three years. For those working here, calling me “Madam” was more familiar. However, it was no longer appropriate to be addressed that way. If Ains started seeing someone else, it would be a significant faux pas. It was better to get used to being called Lady Marves from now on.

“Madam, please be careful today. It’s only been a day since you woke up, and we don’t know when the aftereffects might hit.”

“Yes, I’ll be careful.”

As we were about to enter, Rivet spoke with concern. She was right; the aftereffects could appear at any moment. While both Rivet and I carried the aftereffect reliever, it was only for emergencies, so it was best to be cautious.

We soon passed through the entrance and into the garden. I remembered how meticulously we had tended the garden to impress visitors. My grandfather had first suggested the garden project to me, so every small flower tree along the path was chosen by me.

As I quietly walked towards the mansion, I noticed that the garden hadn’t changed at all. It was filled with ten years of memories. I etched those memories into my mind anew.

After a few minutes of walking, we reached the front door of the mansion.

“Lady Marves!”

“Rachel!”

Rachel, who had been waiting at the entrance, spotted me and ran over. It was heartwarming to see her bowing politely.

“How have you been?”

“I’ve been well. And you, Rachel?”

“Thanks to your concern, I’ve been fine. Please come inside. The master is waiting for you.”

Rachel guided me into the mansion. As expected, Ains, the master of the house, did not come to greet me. It was only natural. There was no need to create an awkward situation by meeting him. If anything, it would have been more uncomfortable if Ains had come out to meet me.

Putting those thoughts aside, I followed Rachel up the stairs. Finally, we arrived at my grandfather’s bedroom.

“Master, Lady Cecilia Marves is here.”

Rachel knocked lightly on the door and announced my arrival.

“Come in.”

My grandfather’s voice granting permission was heard immediately.

Rachel opened the door and stepped aside, allowing me to enter. I saw my grandfather lying in bed. Although it had only been about a month since I left the mansion, his condition seemed much worse than before.

“Grandfather.”

I approached him and called out. A faint smile spread across his face.

“You’re here, Cecil. Sit down. Standing will tire your legs.”

A servant attending to my grandfather placed a chair next to the bed for me. I sat down and took my grandfather’s hand. His hand, now wrinkled and thin, felt weak in mine.

When I first held my grandfather’s hand upon entering this mansion, it had been rough and calloused from years of wielding a sword. But illness and old age had weakened his hand.

Moreover, his face was much more gaunt than it had been a month ago. Now I understood why Dr. Watt had suggested I visit him. The reality hit me hard, and tears welled up in my dry eyes.

“How have you been? You seem even thinner.”

“I’m the same as always. I’m more worried about you. I heard you moved back to the Marves estate after divorcing that rascal Ains. Is it uncomfortable?”

“I’m fine. The Duke of Graham was generous with the alimony, so I lack nothing.”

“That’s good to hear.”

My grandfather’s eyes crinkled with a gentle smile. His face still bore the kind demeanor he had always had.

“It must have been awkward for you to come here. I must have caused you some worry.”

“No, I’m sorry I haven’t visited more often. If the Duke of Graham doesn’t mind, I’ll come by more frequently.”

“Then I’ll have to talk to Ains. That stubborn boy is always too busy with work to visit me often. He has no right to stop you from visiting me.”

“It seems the Duke still doesn’t visit often.”

Before the divorce, Ains was always neglectful towards Grandfather. Because of this, Grandfather often called him heartless, and Ains never bothered to argue against it. Their relationship had been strained ever since that incident.

“He’s always been like that. He thinks I’m the one who killed his father.”

“Grandfather…”

“It’s not entirely untrue. I did push my son, who was paralyzed with grief after losing his wife, to join the monster subjugation mission.”

Grandfather looked up at the ceiling, as if reminiscing about the distant past.

“I thought that physical activity would help him forget the painful memories more quickly. As you know, Alex was a master swordsman, unmatched in the empire.”

Ains’s father and my grandfather’s son, Alex Graham, was so skilled with a sword that he led the Imperial Guard. It wasn’t unusual for him to join the empire’s large-scale mission to subjugate the monsters in the northern forest.

After losing his wife to illness, his father had been deeply troubled. It was Grandfather who suggested he join the subjugation mission. Ains’s father followed his advice, and everyone, including Grandfather, believed he would return safely as always.

But when the mission ended, what returned to the Graham estate were Alex Graham’s corpse and his belongings.

“If I had known he would come back dead, I would never have sent him.”

Grandfather’s grip on my hand tightened, and tears welled up in his eyes.

“It wasn’t your fault, Grandfather. It was an accident.”

I tried to comfort him, feeling a pang of sorrow. Grandfather forced a smile at my words.

“Thank you for saying that, Cecil. Because of me, you must have faced a lot of resentment from Ains as well.”

Grandfather sighed softly.

“I shouldn’t have brought you two together in the first place. I worry that I made both you and Ains unhappy.”

“That’s not true. At least while I was here, I was happy.”

Grandfather looked into my eyes for a long time, his gaze filled with both regret and concern.

“How about staying for dinner tonight? I plan to dine in the dining room today.”

Grandfather suddenly suggested. I hesitated to answer. Dining with Grandfather wasn’t difficult, but the thought of running into Ains troubled me.

However, I soon nodded in agreement.

“Yes, I’ll stay for dinner.”

Ains rarely dined in the dining room, so the chances of encountering him were slim. Even if we did meet, there was no need to hide. I had already informed Grandfather of my visit, and Ains hadn’t objected.

As an official guest, there was no reason to flee as if I was here to steal.

* * *

I kept Grandfather company until dinner. He spent most of his day in his bedroom, except for the couple of hours he went for walks. With only the servants and maids for company, he must have felt very lonely.

When I lived in the mansion, I kept him company every day, but after the divorce, I could no longer do that. I couldn’t imagine how much he must have craved conversation.

“By the way, the Emperor’s birthday was a few days ago. Was everything alright? That old man must have invited you.”

“Oh, that day…”

Talking about recent events, I found myself momentarily speechless. The ball was far from pleasant. It was a stark reminder of my new position as Lady Marves, no longer the Duchess of Graham.

The looks and words from people that day…

I realized just how complacent I had been living as the Duchess of Graham. Until then, I had been like a flower in a greenhouse, unaware of the reality outside. People had been kind and friendly to me only because of my title, and I had been too naive to see through it.

It wasn’t their fault. They were simply acting in their own interest. The kindness and warmth they had shown were all a facade, and I had been foolish not to recognize it.

Thinking back on that day, I smiled bitterly.