Episode 56

On the fifteenth day, I finally got to see myself in the mirror.

Normally, by this time, all the swelling should have subsided, but instead, a puffy, round face greeted me.

I was a bit shocked that I’d been walking around looking like this.

Now I understood why the princess had been so startled when she saw me a few days ago.

Back then, I must have been even more swollen than now—no wonder she was surprised.

The next day, I quietly left the imperial villa.

From then on, I continued my treatment at the Duke’s estate.

They said there wasn’t a soul in the capital who didn’t know my story.

I expected reporters and curious onlookers to swarm around me after hearing the rumors, but to my surprise, nothing like that happened.

That was all thanks to Igon’s arrangements.

Without any fuss, I made it back to the Duke’s estate safely.

Lying on the bed in my room, I finally let out a sigh of relief.

It was only then that I realized how tense and terrified I had been the entire time.

The physician at the Duke’s estate prescribed me different medicine than the one from the imperial palace.

Whether it was because of the new medicine or just sheer exhaustion, I felt incredibly sleepy.

For three days, I slept like a log.

Aside from eating and washing, I barely got out of bed.

Once I started to regain my senses, I reached for Rosalind’s book.

By now, I had almost memorized the tattered and nearly illegible writing.

What else was there to do but read in bed for two weeks?

The more I read, the stranger and more unique her records seemed.

Perhaps fearing that some secrets might leak, certain parts were missing.

Rosalind was a meticulous person.

Whenever the narrative seemed oddly disjointed, I realized it was intentional on her part.

It seemed she had hastily scribbled through the parts that didn’t favor her.

Even those stories were so smooth and fitting that it was hard to notice anything strange unless you read them several times.

Not being a mage and never having studied the high discipline of magic, I couldn’t fully grasp the content on my own.

What was clear, though, was that the magic could only be used by those who remember their past lives, the “Unforgettable Ones.” It involved using dark magic, and it required giving something up.

It seemed that Rosalind had given up Artheus.

I remembered how her tone softened whenever she spoke of him.

There could be no other reason for her to avoid meeting him.

If that’s the case, what if what I have to give up is Igon?

My thoughts ran wild, spiraling far beyond reason.

But no matter how much I agonized over it, nothing would change.

I shook my head.

I needed to meet Rosalind.

I had thought about it before, but the idea of going out terrified me.

It seemed that the events of the hunting festival had left me with trauma.

From the moment I got into the carriage to head back to the Duke’s estate, I felt uneasy.

I realized that my mind had weakened.

I didn’t even know where to begin fixing myself.

One thing was certain: I didn’t want to go out.

No, I couldn’t go out, not yet.

My arm still hadn’t fully healed, so wandering around wasn’t an option.

As I was pondering this, Igon came to visit.

Since the day I asked him that difficult question, he had noticeably avoided me for a while. But after we returned to the Duke’s estate, he started acting as naturally as before.

I didn’t call him out on it.

In my fragile state, Igon was essential.

“Shall we go for a walk?” he asked.

“Aren’t you busy?” I replied.

“I can spare some time for my sick little sister.”

Everyone, even the ants in the Duke’s estate, knew how busy Igon always was.

But I decided to be swayed by his charming smile.

I quickly got ready and left the room.

The wind was quite chilly, but the sky was clear and the sunlight was pleasant.

Igon offered me his arm.

Instead of avoiding it, I took his arm, and we slowly walked around the garden.

Servants stood here and there like statues.

For a while after returning to the Duke’s estate, it had been difficult for me to face them.

Not wanting to make things harder for others, I hadn’t let any servants into my room during those three days of sleeping like the dead.

Stella’s words had awakened a sense of inadequacy within me.

Even if she said those things to provoke me, I couldn’t believe that she didn’t mean at least some of it.

Whatever the case, my birth was different from theirs.

I didn’t want to be overly sensitive, but those words had lodged in my heart like thorns, constantly pricking at me.

“Why do you look like that?” Igon asked.

“Huh?”

“You look so down.”

Compared to the days when I was suffocating with sadness, I was much better now.

I forced a small smile to show I was fine. But when I met his worried gaze, emotions welled up inside me.

As my nose started to sting, a tear slipped down my cheek.

I hurriedly tried to wipe it away, but Igon lifted me into his arms.

Instead of wiping my tears, I wrapped my arms around his neck.

With gloved hands, Igon gently brushed the tears from my cheek.

“Let’s go inside.”

I rested my head on his shoulder, leaning into Igon’s warmth.

For a moment, I felt a flicker of fear at the thought of the servants’ eyes on us, but that fear quickly dissolved as Igon carried me up the stairs in his arms.

* * *

Perhaps it was because he saw me cry, but Igon arranged for a merchant to come to the Duke’s estate.

It seemed he was considerate of the fact that I couldn’t leave the estate.

I didn’t refuse.

The merchant, with his smooth talk, displayed an array of fascinating and rare items.

He spent a good while introducing various things.

The exotic and unique goods he presented caught the attention of not just me, but also the maids around me, who were equally captivated.

It was while he was showing off one of these items that he sprayed some perfume into the air.

The rich scent filled my nostrils, and suddenly, my mind lit up as if a light had switched on.

“Aha!”

This is it!

If I couldn’t go out, I could have Rosalind come to me.

Why hadn’t I thought of this before?

“Shall I hang this here, my lady?”

The merchant asked, mistaking my exclamation for interest in the item.

Grateful for the chance to think clearly, and feeling rather pleased with myself, I nodded at him.

“Yes, go ahead.”

I purchased a few more things casually, then, using fatigue as an excuse, I gently nudged the merchant out.

After sending away the merchant Igon had called for me, I instructed one of the maids to inform the staff at “Soul of the Flower” that I wished to purchase some of their new items and that they should bring samples to me.

I figured Rosalind would understand what it meant that the Duke’s estate had summoned her.

And I was right.

Sure enough, by the afternoon, Rosalind herself arrived.

Of course, she didn’t come alone; several staff members carrying large bags accompanied her.

It was clear from her determined look that Rosalind intended to make the most out of this visit.

“Whew… Greetings, my lady,” Rosalind said, catching her breath as she climbed the stairs and entered the room, bowing slightly.

She was still observing some decorum since we were in the Duke’s estate.

“Yes, how have you been? I heard there were new items, so I called you. Please, have a seat.”

I gestured for Rosalind to sit.

She began unpacking small glass bottles and placing them on the table.

I pretended to inspect the samples while waiting for the refreshments to arrive.

As soon as the tea was served, I turned to the maids with a friendly smile.

“Oh, it feels a bit awkward to be the only one choosing. Why don’t you all pick something you like as well?”

“My staff has likely set things up in the next room,” Rosalind added smoothly.

The maids, not suspecting anything, left the room with excited faces.

As soon as Rosalind realized it was just the two of us in the room, her perfect smile faded, and she relaxed into the sofa.

“Did you finish your homework, my lady?” Rosalind asked, her tone casual and face relaxed.

I nodded, handing her the book she had given me.

“There are a few parts I didn’t understand, but I read it all.”

“That’s to be expected. You really did your homework,” Rosalind replied, rubbing her tired face as she accepted the book.

“But, Rosalind, I don’t know how to use magic, and yet in this book…”

“I know. This book was written on the premise that the reader already knows how to use magic. I didn’t intend to show it to you.”

“It was meant for someone else? Not just as a record?”

“Yes. It was written for Artheus. I planned to show it to him after I fixed his eyes.”

“After you fixed his eyes?”

Rosalind gave a bitter smile.

Although I didn’t fully understand, it seemed that Rosalind had tried hard to heal Artheus’s eyes. But considering that his vision was still impaired when I met him, it was clear she hadn’t succeeded.

“Anyway, that’s not the important part. Since you haven’t formally learned magic, we’ll set that aside. Do you at least understand the concept of what needs to be changed?”

“You mentioned creating a new body to transfer a soul into. While I didn’t fully grasp everything, from what I gathered, isn’t it about using the hide of a demonic beast to craft a new body with magic and then transferring memories into it?”

“Exactly. You’ve understood it well enough. Have you memorized the magic circle and the incantations?”

“Yes.”

Rosalind grinned and slid a pen and paper towards me from the corner of the table.

“Draw it.”

I sketched the magic circle I had seen in the book onto the paper. My memories from Korea helped me with the rote memorization. After meticulously drawing the magic circle, I double-checked it several times, filling in any gaps.

“I thought you were just bluffing, but you really remembered it,” Rosalind said, surprisingly offering me praise.

“If you’ve gotten this far, you’re almost there.”

“But Rosalind, I still can’t use magic. I wasn’t born with any magical power.”

“You don’t need innate magic. I wasn’t born with any either, but a well-crafted magic circle and incantation can work with just the hide of a demonic beast, a magic stone, and the faint magic that flows through the air.”

As she muttered, Rosalind drew an unfamiliar magic circle on the paper.

With ease, she sketched a small magic circle, placed her hand on it, and mumbled something. Suddenly, a flame flared up before my eyes and quickly died down.

I flinched back from the sudden heat on my face.

Rosalind, noticing my reaction, smiled mischievously.

“The issue is your resolve.”

“My resolve?”

I parroted her words like a confused child.

I wished she would explain things more clearly, but it didn’t seem like she intended to.

“Yes, your resolve. Are you prepared to give up something precious to you for your own sake?”

I had anticipated this question, but hearing it confirmed by Rosalind made me feel uneasy.

It was a dilemma I had wrestled with countless times without finding an answer.

“Yes, you should wrestle with it,” Rosalind said, rising from her seat.

I stood up as well, following her lead.

“For now, practice with this magic circle until I come to find you again. When you’re successful, I’ll call for you.”

Without further explanation, she handed me my next task.

As she turned to leave, I instinctively reached out to stop her, but Rosalind didn’t let herself be held back.

“But Rosalind, I don’t have much time left.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll call for you before then. And besides…”

She smiled at me.

“You haven’t made up your mind yet, have you?”

Her words struck me like a sharp blade.

“Take care of yourself until we meet again. I’ll leave an ointment that will help with the swelling. Pay the bill.”

I watched as Rosalind walked out of the room without a single backward glance.

When the door closed, I crumbled, feeling utterly defeated.