Episode 76

As expected, the orphanage was completely empty, not even the sound of a mouse to be heard.

It was because, on a day like today, when many outsiders came and went, even the newborns had been moved to the temple.

I walked through the familiar orphanage without hesitation.

The Lion Room, the Rabbit Room, the Chick Room, the Giraffe Room…

I passed by all the rooms divided by age.

Only after reaching the very end of the hallway did I finally arrive at my destination.

[Book Dock]

Click.

I slid open the door right away.

A spacious area unfolded before me.

Sky-blue four-tiered bookshelves and yellow and blue desks were neatly arranged to fit the size of the children.

This was the library.

“Here we go.”

I quickly moved between the bookshelves.

For a library in an orphanage, it was quite large and held a decent number of books.

Most of them were donated children’s fairy tales, but since this was a temple-run orphanage, there were also many religious books.

‘I need to find materials related to my heart and my regression.’

Originally, I planned to go to the library inside the temple.

But the temple’s library wasn’t open to just anyone.

Even with Duke Kallios’s influence, it would take some time to get an access pass.

While I was pondering this, a brilliant idea crossed my mind.

‘The orphanage’s library!’

In the orphanage, they had copies of the scriptures because older children were often tasked with copying them.

And if I took advantage of the gap created by volunteer activities, I could pull off the perfect crime!

“Here!”

Just in time, I found the bookshelf labeled [Scriptures] and stopped.

“One… Six! Got it.”

Scanning the spines of the books, I quickly found what I was looking for.

The earlier volumes of the scriptures were completely empty, likely because they had been taken for dictation assignments.

Up to the fifth scripture, it covered the goddess, the church doctrines, and the lives of the saints. From the sixth scripture onwards, it contained records from different eras.

The content became significantly more extensive and difficult, so the younger children rarely read it.

‘I didn’t even read it as an adult.’

When I pulled out the sixth scripture, as thick as a dictionary, its heavy weight immediately overwhelmed me.

“Ugh… So heavy! Aaargh!”

Staggering clumsily, I plopped down on the floor.

Thud— Flip!

The book fell, its cover flipping open as it hit the ground.

Luckily, a soft rug had been laid out, so nothing got damaged.

Of course, I meant me.

I couldn’t care less if a cursed scripture in this wretched orphanage got damaged.

“Phew…”

I clutched my chest in relief and crawled over to the scripture that had fallen open.

Fortunately, the page it opened to contained the information I was looking for.

「Saint Arukkia was born in the slums of the southern region of Koswald in the year XXX, month X.」

Arukkia.

The first saint who offered her heart to the goddess and turned back time.

I wanted to know how she gave up her heart, and what happened afterward.

After the first page, it went on about Arukkia’s turbulent childhood and her awakening as a saint.

I skipped all of that without hesitation.

Flip-flip-flip!

After turning quite a few pages, I finally found the part I was looking for.

「Evil spread across the world.

Emperor Estarod I declared war, and the Kallios family took the lead…….」

As I read, I came across a familiar name.

After glancing at it briefly, I moved on to the next paragraph.

「In the year XXX, month X, Saint Arukkia offered her heart on the altar of the Primordial Plateau, where the goddess Ereia slumbered.

Thus, by performing the holy miracle of reversal, she returned four years into the past and annihilated the demons and their beasts.

One of her notable achievements was the defeat of the beasts hiding in the Dark Forest…….」

‘I don’t care about her achievements, so let’s skip this.’

Flip-flip-flip!

I turned through several more pages, and finally.

「Four years later, having led the Holy War to victory, she returned to the capital with the war orphans she cared for and founded the first orphanage.

Afterward, she lived peacefully with the children until she suddenly died at the age of 23, one year after the war ended.」

I confirmed the fate of Arukkia, who had sacrificed her heart.

“Sud… den death?”

Dying at 23.

I hadn’t expected her to live long without a heart, but wasn’t that a bit too early?

‘She even gave up her heart and regressed, but she died just a year after winning the war.’

It was such a sad and cruel end.

“This doesn’t feel right….”

Even though it was the death of a saint who had made the current Ereia possible, they didn’t even know the exact cause.

I felt an overwhelming sense of unease at the thought of someone dying in a similar way to me.

The only relief was that I didn’t need to worry about dying right away.

Saint Arukkia died one year after her regression.

In my past life, my regression point was at 18 years old.

So, if this scripture were accurate, I’d still have 14 years left until death!

‘Haha! Lucky me!’

I laughed foolishly, then immediately sobered up and shoved the scripture away.

“This isn’t funny at all!”

It couldn’t possibly be good to know when you’re going to die.

Just in case, I flipped one more page to check the end.

「After her death, an autopsy revealed that she truly had no heart.

Her body was buried in her hometown of Koswald, but was later moved to the Saint Arukkia Monastery in the year XXX.」

No new information.

But one thing became certain.

‘As I thought, I’m not a saint.’

I was just lucky enough to be born with healing abilities.

Unlike Saint Arukkia, my death had nothing to do with religious reasons.

After all, I had given my heart to a human, not a god.

In the end, everything was back to square one.

“Phew…”

I placed my hand over my left chest and let my face fall.

No matter how much I pressed my palm down, there was no heartbeat to be felt.

An empty void that I instinctively knew was there.

“Ugh! So where did my heart go…?!”

As I clutched my head in frustration, I searched the scripture one last time.

Then, I suddenly realized something I had missed.

‘The Primordial Plateau.’

Arukkia had offered her heart on the altar built on the Primordial Plateau and then regressed.

That place is now known as the Sharlovate Plateau, a sacred site where high priests and clergy go on pilgrimages.

‘If I go there, could I learn the real reason for my regression?’

It’s said that those who return from the Sharlovate Plateau understand the will of the gods and the truth of all things, allowing them to cease all worldly desires.

I didn’t particularly believe in that kind of thing.

But for now, I had no other options.

I didn’t want to die as an outcast in this novel, unaware of where my heart was.

‘…Let’s grow up quickly and go to the Sharlovate Plateau.’

Thud—!

With that faint hope and unclear information, I closed the scripture.

Thud—!

“Ugh! Huff, huff…”

After putting the heavy book back on the shelf, I left the library.

When I glanced at the time, about 30 minutes had passed.

‘I need to hurry back and organize my thoughts.’

Just as I was about to walk toward the entrance in a hurry—

Thud! Thud—!

“…Ah!”

“…Ow!”

Suddenly, I heard muffled voices and a dull thudding sound from somewhere.

“Huh?”

I was startled.

I hadn’t expected anyone to be in this empty orphanage.

I turned my head toward the direction of the sound, and there, next to the library at the far end of the hallway…

The side door leading to the garbage area was slightly ajar.

The sound seemed to be coming from beyond it.

Thud, thud—!

As I stood frozen, staring at the door, the dull thudding echoed again.

‘…I should ignore this, right?’

The garbage area was a place where older and more troublesome kids at the orphanage often gathered.

Based on my two lives of experience at the orphanage, I could guess with high probability that the sound was someone getting beaten up.

So, I immediately turned my back to the side door.

“Ugh…”

But I couldn’t take a single step.

Because as soon as I entered the orphanage, I had a flashback of my past.

Even though I was part of the Lion Room with kids aged four and five, so I didn’t get beaten up by other kids…

‘I was the one doing the beating instead.’

But if I hadn’t gone to the temple and had grown older, I would have been in the same situation as them.

By the time kids in the orphanage turned seven, they were well aware of the power of hierarchy and violence.

“Sigh… Are you a saint?”

I sighed deeply and turned toward the side door.

‘…I’ll just check what’s going on and leave.’

There was a slim chance the kids could just be playing.

But it didn’t take long for me to realize that was just wishful thinking.

A moment later.

“Headmistress! Teachers! Over here, over here! Someone’s beating someone—!”

Stomp stomp.

I was stomping my feet and pretending to call out to the empty air, as if summoning the non-existent headmistress.