Episode 108
The term “relic” generally refers to the legacy of the gods, such as the ” platinum chalice” made of platinum, but essentially encompasses all tools that harness divine power. For example, Victoria’s “Ring of Attraction” given to Asher also falls into the category of relics.
Those who skillfully manipulate divine power were able to create relics, and research on relics conducted in temples often aimed to understand how relics functioned, ultimately leading to the goal of creating relics.
‘Viscount Fitzroy said that there are hardly any cases of success.’
So Asher’s research also heavily relied on Victoria. Victoria was the only person Asher had met who knew how to create relics.
However, now Agnes had casually turned the pendant into a relic as well.
The reason it could be known was simple.
‘If you inject divine power into an object without any ability, it quickly flows out.’
Like pouring water into a leaky container, there was nowhere to block or use, so the air naturally circulated and flowed out. However, the divine power Agnes had just injected into the pendant didn’t flow out. Instead of flowing out, it felt more like it was accumulating.
‘ What did she do?’
Lillian was confused. It was already astonishing enough that Agnes could converse with the gods and know her own destiny, let alone turning the pendant into something other than an ordinary item.
‘But I didn’t feel anything from the pendant.’
Lillian could sense the flow of divine power. But the pendant was clearly endlessly ordinary. If the pendant had any special functions like the platinum chalice or the Ring of Attraction, Lillian would have noticed it long ago.
‘What am I missing?’
Lillian stared blankly at Agnes. Since then, Lillian could observe Agnes’s belly swell like a moon. It wasn’t an exaggeration to say that Agnes always carried the pendant around.
From Cedric leaving for the battlefield to Agnes secluding herself in the annex.
Perhaps because she was looking into the past, everything passed by quickly.
As Agnes’s belly swelled, she became weaker. It was as if the child in her womb was consuming her life. Whether she didn’t want to be found out or didn’t have the energy to pretend affection anymore, Agnes gradually reduced her meetings with people. The longer she spent alone, the more clearly Lillian could see Agnes’s true face.
And the process of preparing for her death as well.
“My child, we will meet before winter ends. Forgive me for raising you without a mother. I’m sorry that all I can leave behind is a life full of misfortune.”
Agnes was a meticulous person. She never left behind a self-destructive image. Even if she cried all day thinking about the tragedy that was about to come, she always smiled brightly when someone else came.
And so, the Marchioness Maynard became a legendary figure in the Maynard family.
Kind and affectionate to everyone, wise and beautiful Lady Agnes Maynard.
Whenever she felt pessimistic about her fate, she talked to the child in her womb. The echo, unheard by anyone, resounded clearly to the child in the womb and to Lillian.
“I worried a lot about you. Life is a series of pains. But every parent wants to leave only good things to their child. Who would want to inflict pain on their child?”
From the moment one becomes a parent, the child becomes the purpose of life, perhaps for that reason. Parents strive to give good things to their child, and they find satisfaction when they achieve that purpose.
Then what about parents who foresee tragedy from the beginning?
Agnes knew what fate she had.
She was destined to give birth to a child and then die soon after, and the temple would target the child. Even if she avoided one of those, the unhappiness that came with the authority of the moon would surely follow the child persistently.
But is giving birth to a child the right thing to do?
Is it truly beneficial for a child to be left with a life adorned with unhappiness, without a mother?
“Still, I hope you get to see the world at least once, darling. It’s quite charming to rake the fallen leaves in the yard at the end of autumn, and it’s delightful to see how well sponge cake with cream and fig jam pairs with black tea.”
In life, there will be painful moments and unbearable suffering.
There will surely be moments when one no longer wishes to live. There are times when the future seems uncertain, and the path ahead feels as if it’s been entirely obscured by ink, as well as days when one groans under the weight of loneliness, feeling as if suffocating.
Life is a series of hardships, it’s only natural.
But.
“Pain is evidence of life, darling. Feeling pain and suffering means you want to live.”
The existence of unhappiness implies the existence of happy days, and just as there are painful days, there will undoubtedly be joyful ones.
As you live, there will come a day when the pain dulls.
When that day comes, you may find yourself thinking that you’ve done well to endure until now.
“…But this is just my excuse. In truth, it’s just my selfishness.”
At the end of her recitation, Agnes let out a faint laugh. It was a smile that seemed like crying.
“Now I have neither sorrows nor joys… I just wish you could live in my place.”
A wish for someone else to live in her place.
Lillian felt her heart sink at Agnes’s words.
“I apologize for being such a greedy mother.”
It was undoubtedly a message to the child in her womb. Lillian knew she had no right to respond to those words, she could only listen in silence. However, Lillian couldn’t just stay still. She felt breathless. Her throat tightened. She couldn’t even understand why.
She simply wanted to ask.
Do you resent the child…?
Agnes couldn’t hear Lillian’s words. Lillian was not present at this moment, she was merely an observer in consciousness.
“Do you have no wishes for the child? Dying because of the child is the same thing. Whether you wish for them to become a good person, be happy, or anything… don’t you have any wishes?”
Agnes smiled as if she heard Lillian’s words. Though Lillian knew she was someone who habitually smiled, that smile still pierced her heart.
“I truly love you, darling.”
Agnes embraced her swollen belly with both hands. Her softly smiling face bore a striking resemblance to the girl Lillian loved most.
―I truly love you, Lili.
Agnes had no wishes for the child. Just living and being born was her selfish desire, Agnes said. If there was anything she wished for the child, it was truly just life itself.
That scene overlapped with the image of Swan. Swan’s last words also echoed.
―Do everything I couldn’t do… and live happily.
Lillian’s eyes welled up with tears. Perhaps she had been crying for a while now, she couldn’t be sure. It wasn’t certain. The Lillian here was just consciousness, so even if time passed here, she wouldn’t feel hunger or fatigue.
Strictly speaking, it would be correct to say that there was almost no passage of time in the outside world due to the lack of physical changes, not because time had been moved to the past, but because it was simply reading the memories of objects.
Around that time, her vision blurred. She wanted to return to reality.
‘I don’t want to leave.’
She wanted to watch Agnes a little longer here. Could she see Swan after Agnes died? If time hardly passed, she wanted to stay a little longer. Although she knew she shouldn’t lose too much blood, she didn’t want to return to reality.
An initially nonexistent desire gradually emerged, and Lillian gripped the pendant in her hand tighter.
But perhaps it was because she had already lost too much blood. Or perhaps because she had been deprived of too much vitality.
‘I feel dizzy…’
In a moment when her vision blurred and everything flashed before her eyes, she saw a familiar face.
“…Li, Lillian!”
It was a redhead.
