Chapter 01
Goodbye, Everyone
“Here, I’ve brought the towels.”
A spirit beast claiming to be a dragon dumped the pile of towels it had been carrying on its short back onto the floor.
The sun-dried towels tumbled down in front of me, forming a small mountain.
Why the hell am I folding towels here?
Gritting my teeth, I reluctantly picked up a towel.
Running a hot spring in a quiet, secluded place with few visitors—
That had been my lifelong dream. A way to escape the shackles of my family, which had produced nothing but S-rank hunters for generations since the world’s first dungeon break.
So, when I first awakened as a hot spring owner, I thought my golden age had finally begun…
The hot spring was indeed located in a remote, hard-to-find spot, just as I had hoped.
After all, this was a celestial hot spring, invisible to ordinary humans and most hunters alike.
That much was fine.
With a total capacity of only four guests, it perfectly aligned with my wish to avoid crowds.
The problem was that those four were all crazy bastards.
“Owner, I seem to have injured my back a little. Would you mind applying some medicine for me…?”
Right on cue, the first crazy bastard appeared.
A black-haired man, known as the Immortal Murderer, Sharenian, stood before me. His clothes, drenched in blood, were draped loosely over his arm, revealing his chiseled back.
Wiping the bloodstains off his cheek, he gazed at me with obsidian eyes that resembled the night sky. Ever since I treated his wound just once, he had come here every single day, bleeding all over the place.
This is a hot spring, not an emergency room!
“If you’re hurt, go to a hospital.”
“Ah, I’m feeling dizzy after losing so much blood…”
Whenever Sharenian ran out of excuses, he would claim dizziness and dramatically collapse—always making sure to fall against me.
You’re an immortal, you fraud. You won’t die.
I wasn’t sure why he was so hell-bent on annoying me, but one thing was clear—he was the scheming type of crazy bastard.
“Suon, aren’t you curious about today’s fortune?”
The second crazy bastard approached and sat next to me, wearing a loose robe with his golden hair still wet from bathing, droplets clinging like dew. He had the appearance of a gentle desert fox.
Just because he has an innocent face doesn’t mean you should let your guard down.
“For example, your romantic fortune…”
Before I knew it, he was whispering in my ear, closing the distance between us.
He was like a fox pretending to be a puppy.
His name was Unsu, and he could literally see people’s fortunes.
“Do you believe in fortune?”
I remembered the first words that came out of his mouth when we met.
Ever since, he had been wagging his tail at every opportunity, pestering me to let him read my fortune.
It would be easier to explain if I said he’s like those “Do you believe in the Way?” type of crazy bastards.
“Huh? Why don’t we toss this grotesque corpse away and read your fortune?”
Unsu clung to my other arm, pestering me.
The irritation surged up to my throat, making the back of my neck stiffen.
I was already swamped with work, and now they were driving me insane.
I was this close to using the towel I was folding to smack that pretty face of his.
Maybe I should just quit?
Grinding my teeth, I lifted a towel—then froze as a window popped up before my eyes.
[The pride of hot spring towels lies in their perfect angles!]
[Fold towels with perfect angles (50/100)]
[Completion reward: 2 million gold]
2 million gold!
That was more than the average salary of a full-time employee in a decent job.
Folding just 100 towels to earn a month’s worth of salary—no matter how I thought about it, it was an incredibly sweet deal.
Alright, just 50 more towels, and I’ll have 2 million gold.
Even if I quit, I’ll finish this first.
I am happy. I am so happy.
All I have to do is fold towels, and money will rain from the heavens!
“Suon, are you ignoring me? Hmm?”
While I was folding the 51st towel, Unsu grabbed and shook my arm, ruining the careful arrangement I had made.
[The current towel angle (45 degrees) has deviated, therefore it will not be counted.]
I was almost done, but because of this crazy bastard, I had to start over from the beginning…
“Ah, I can’t take this anymore!”
My patience finally snapped, and I flung the towel onto the floor.
Hearing my outburst, the door to the Underworld Bath creaked open, revealing the third crazy bastard.
A man with flowing black hair as smooth as silk and ghostly pale skin stepped out.
It was Yeomra.
Yes, that Yeomra, King of the Underworld.
After spending all day reviewing the ledgers of the afterlife, Yeomra would come to the hot spring to soak his exhausted body in the restorative waters. But no matter how much work he had, he still managed to bring paperwork even to the hot spring.
With a long smoking pipe in his mouth, Yeomra exhaled a misty puff of smoke and parted his reddish lips.
“Write it here.”
He extended part of a long scroll toward me and handed me a brush.
“What do you want me to write?”
“The name of the bastard who made you angry.”
“What is this scroll that you’re telling me to write a name on?”
Giving me an unconcerned glance, Yama spoke lightly, as if his words were just another wisp of smoke.
“Book of Life and Death.”
Don’t people die if their names are written in there?
“If you add their birthdate, the death will be even more precise.”
No, seriously, is this some kind of Eastern Death Note?
“If you don’t know it, I can look it up for you.”
“No thanks. I’m not angry anymore, so put that away.”
I grabbed Yeomra’s arm to stop him as he began pulling out what looked like a birth record.
Anything else, I might have entertained—but the Book of Life and Death? Not even a powerful Celestial could survive if their name was written in that.
And judging by how serious his face was, this wasn’t a joke.
Looking slightly disappointed, Yeomra rolled the scroll back up.
This was a man who could snatch away a life with a single stroke of his brush. A true embodiment of beauty and cruelty.
Especially his red lips—like camellia petals—and piercing red eyes, he had a strangely bewitching presence.
Of course, to my eyes, he was just another crazy bastard holding a Korean version of Death Note.
Alright, stay calm and start over from the beginning.
I started refolding the crumpled towel with renewed determination.
But someone snatched the towel from my hands.
“I told you from the start, didn’t I? This place isn’t something a small, incompetent, and utterly materialistic brat like you can handle.”
The man in the light ocean-blue robe, as irritating in words as he was in personality, was Hae-ryeong.
With silver hair and bright, water-colored eyes, his ethereal beauty made him seem like a being from the Heavens.
But in my opinion, he was the biggest mastermind of them all—the first Celestial I had ever made a contract with, the one who controlled the hot spring’s waters.
As sharp as sandpaper in personality, he took over folding the towels from me.
Far quicker and more precise than I was, he efficiently folded a towel and handed the neatly finished product back to me.
[Towels folded by others will not be counted toward the tally.]
[Attempting to receive outside help has been detected. A penalty cooldown has been applied.]
[Penalty Cooldown: 12 hours 00 minutes 00 seconds]
Ah…
If you’re going to be coldhearted, just don’t help at all!
Why did you have to be a tsundere crazy bastard?!
The penalty cooldown was half a day.
Only fifty towels were available per day.
Because of that damn tsundere folding a single towel, I was now short one towel and had to extend my work by an entire extra day.
As someone who carried the blood of a nation obsessed with speed, my frustration and fury burned like wildfire.
This time, I’m not going to let it slide!
The only issue standing in the way of my peaceful dream of running a hot spring was that these four lunatics were the ones who had awakened me as the owner of this place.
If it weren’t for the contract clause stating that breaking our agreement would result in my death, I would’ve cut ties with them immediately…
But as long as I didn’t actually break the contract, it wasn’t a problem, right?
My brain spun rapidly, ideas forming as fast as a satellite launching into space.
With the force of a rocket, I sprang to my feet.
As expected, the moment I moved, Sharenian, who had been leaning against me, nearly collapsed to the floor before catching himself.
I knew it—he was faking it!
“Yeomra, can I borrow that scroll and brush for a second?”
Without hesitation, Yeomra handed them over.
Taking the scroll and brush, I sat down and fervently began writing.
I could feel all four pairs of eyes locked on me as I worked.
Once I was finished, I picked up the scroll and stood.
Then, I hung it up on the wooden entrance to the hot spring.
“Well then, goodbye everyone.”
With the brightest, most serene smile I could muster, I looked back at them.
Giving one final wave, I opened the gate—an exit that would transport me anywhere I imagined—and disappeared.
“What’s this?”
Yeomra’s expression twisted as he looked at the scroll.
The four constellations all gathered in front of the scroll.
[Closed indefinitely from today.
—Hot Spring Owner, Park Suon]
That day marked the beginning of it all.
The day those crazy constellation bastards became obsessed with chasing after me.
Thank you for reading! ♡
