The Dead Villainess Had A Child With The Male Lead

Chapter 20 I Can’t Lose

That’s what he said, but Killion knew better. Aaron was better than anyone else.

His parents, his servants, his teachers, and the other knights had all spoken of his brilliance.

And to be caught by his own brother speaking ill of his brother, who was perfect in every way!

He wondered if his brother was inwardly laughing at the disparaging words that came from the mouth of a man so far below him.

Killion couldn’t help but feel sorry for himself. He was angry.

“Still, since you’ve taken the time to come and see me, can’t you forgive me, Killion?”

“…”

Aaron, who had now moved closer, dropped to one knee to be at Killion’s eye level, and smiled sheepishly.

“I’m not going to see you for a month from tomorrow, and you’re just going to show me your sullen face, can’t you at least smile a little, huh?”

Aaron ruffled his young brother’s hair playfully as he stood there, fat and pale. It was a gesture they usually played on each other.

But Killion was in no mood to play.

He was embarrassed and angry. He wanted to run away and hide.

So he became even more pointed.

Killion swatted Aaron’s hand, still ruffling his hair, away.

“You promised to ride with me this week, and you said a true knight doesn’t make promises he can’t keep!”

“That’s… sorry, Killion.”

“You’re not a knight or anything! I don’t even want to look at you! Why don’t you just go and never come back this time?”

“Killion, what are you talking about…”

Before Aaron could finish his sentence, Killion whirled on his heel and ran to his bedroom.

With a bang, she slammed the door shut and locked it so no one could get in.

He should have said he was sorry, that he didn’t mean what he muttered under his breath, that he was sorry for being separated from his brother again, but he was still only 10 years old, and he was alone in his room, sobbing like a chicken.

“Killion, take care of yourself, and I’ll write to you, and you’ll write back sometimes, okay?”

Aaron shouted from the doorway.

His voice was still full of affection.

Aaron seemed to stand in the doorway for a moment, waiting for his brother’s response.

But Killion gave no answer.

He didn’t want his brother to see him crying like a fool.

A month later, a box returned instead of Aaron.

The knight who carried it sobbed and said

“During our demon extermination campaign, we encountered a number of unexpectedly large demons, and the damage was extensive. Deputy Leader Aaron fought valiantly until the last moment.”

Father and Mother broke down at the news.

So did Killion.

“Brother… Aaron, Brother… Hmph, Brother… Come back! Ughhhhh!”

Tears poured down his face.

His dazed mind echoed the last words had said to Aaron a month ago.

‘You’re not a knight or anything! I don’t even want to look at you! Why don’t you just go and never come back this time?!!’

The constant echo of the shouting was almost too much to bear.

He plugged his ears tightly, but it didn’t help.

“Stop it! I didn’t mean it! I didn’t mean it! So stop it! I don’t want to hear it!”

No matter how hard he tried. The child held his head and wept.

He hated himself and missed his brother.

He cursed himself, and missed his brother.

Killion opened his eyes at the sound of the carriage door opening.

“Hmmm… Aaron brother… Brother… Please…!”

Killion opened his eyes at the sound of the wagon door opening.

‘It was a dream…’

As he sat there, dazed, on the edge of dream and reality, he heard the voice of his aide, Windler.

“We’ve arrived, My Lord.”

“Uh… yes.”

I’d been having these dreams for a while now, and they were familiar.

But he hadn’t had one in recent years, and I’d thought I’d forgiven himself, that I’d healed, but perhaps not. It wasn’t enough.

‘Why am I having this dream now…’

What is he afraid of? What was he worried about? He asked himself questions but no answers.

“My Lord, are you ill?”

Windler asked, concerned about Killion’s condition after sitting still in the carriage for over a minute, studying his complexion.

Killion swiped at his face and stretched his legs out of the carriage.

“I’m fine, I just dozed off.”

***

A ballroom with music playing in a bright, cheerful rhythm.

Gorgeously dressed nobles were gathered in small groups, sipping champagne and chatting about various topics.

But Killion could not concentrate on the conversation.

He was distracted by the Empress’s maid who had appeared before him as soon as he stepped out of the carriage.

Her words kept echoing in his mind.

‘The Princess does not need an escort today.’

‘Why?’

‘Her Majesty has had a sudden attack of anemia and is currently being rested. She will come to the banqueting hall when she feels better.’

‘Is she in much pain?’

‘No, not really. She says she’ll be fine once she’s rested.’

‘… I see.’

The fact that she needed to rest when she wasn’t really sick, that she was sick enough to rest but still came to the banquet, that the Princess news was delivered by the Empress’s maid instead of the Princess maid, and that the maid’s expression and tone were stiff and cold, without any concern for the Price, all seemed suspicious.

‘Calm down, there’s no need to be so sensitive.’

It must have been a dream.

Whenever he had a dream about his brother, he would become very sensitive and worry about things that didn’t matter.

He would stop himself because he felt like he was worrying unnecessarily.

But the ability to control your thoughts is not something that everyone has. Including Killion.

He needed air.

It was time to move away from the crowd and head for the terrace.

“It’s been a long time, Lord Killion.”

“Ah, I see, Saint. I hear you’re busy preparing for the pilgrimage.”

“Yes, I am, but I can’t keep turning down the imperial family’s repeated invitations, so this is the last one before I leave.”

It had been a long time since the two had seen each other at the last victory banquet.

They had worked together on the battlefield, covered in dirt and blood, so there was a sense of camaraderie even in this unfamiliar place.

They chatted for a while longer.

“What’s the timeline for your pilgrimage?” He asked.

“About three months, they said.”

“That’s a long journey. I hope you’re in good health, saint.”

“Actually, I shouldn’t be doing this, but… I’m getting nostalgic for the days when I was tending to patients on the battlefield.”

“I’m giddy thinking about …”

“I’m getting giddy just thinking about how many other banquets we’ll be attending… on the pilgrimage, and I wonder if I look like I’m wearing something that doesn’t fit…”

Evangeline smiled wryly.

It was something she didn’t dare say to anyone.

But thanks to their camaraderie, she found it easy to confide in Killion.

Killion nodded, smiling lightly.

“I understand. So do I.”

“Lord Killion? I don’t think that would be the case for someone born into nobility.”

“Nobility is noble in its own way. I’m more of a knight than a nobleman, more suited to the battlefield than the ballroom.”

A relaxed smile tugged at the corners of Killion’s mouth.

“Well, there’s someone over there who’s going to be sad to hear that.”

“What?”

Evangeline’s gaze flicked to where Veronia was entering the ballroom.

It had been an hour since the banquet had begun.

All eyes were on the pretty young lady as she walked down the aisle.

She was beautiful to begin with, but her beauty was even more radiant today, and everyone gazed in fascination.

Killion was no different.

He too stood dumbfounded for a moment, looking at Veronia’s dazzling form.

“You’d better get going, before you lose her.” She said, “there’s already a line of competitors.”

“Oh…?”

Evangeline brought Killion back to his senses.

He bowed to her in silence and walked straight to Veronia

Evangeline had been right when she said the competition was lined up.

As Killion hesitated and paused, a crowd gathered around Veronia.

They all chorused in unison, praising Veronia’s beauty.

It was then.

Killion caught a glimpse of Veronia, her shoulders shaking as she giggled at a man’s joke.

A flash of lightning flashed in Killion’s eyes.

Wasn’t it just me he was laughing so innocently, or was he showing it to everyone? Killion felt a twinge of regret.

‘Tsk, that’s ridiculous.’

Puzzled by the strange feeling that had suddenly overtaken him, Killion clicked his tongue at himself.

‘Just because Veronia is my fiancée, just because I’ve been spending a lot of time with her lately, just because I’ve seen her laugh, sleep, and cry up close, just because I’ve been given the gift of her voice… doesn’t mean I have a monopoly on her every expression.’

‘Monopolize…’

That’s… impossible, isn’t it? He shook his head as another strange thought tried to creep in.

He shook his head to clear his mind of the nonsense.

Before he knew it, Killion had moved closer to Veronia.

He was just about to extend his hand to greet her and ask her to dance.

The man who had made her laugh with his joke a moment ago spoke again.

He didn’t stop there: he extended his hand to her and asked her to dance.

‘That’s rude!’

Killion clenched his molars together.

It was no secret that Killion was here, that he and Veronia were engaged, that they always took their first dance together.

And yet, what was he trying to do now?

It was too rude to be polite. Or had he lost his nerve?

‘I can’t lose.’