No Need For Regrets

Chapter 72

Kina quickly prepared the medicine.

Though there were no major injuries, Lexion seemed utterly exhausted.

Moreover, Seriniel didn’t know this, but he hadn’t slept properly the night before, so his condition was far from good.

“Did you drink it all?”

The medicine was extremely bitter. Lexion nodded a few times, slightly grimacing as he lay down on the bed.

Then suddenly, something round slipped into his mouth.

It was a small candy.

“I asked Kina to prepare it. I thought the medicine might be too bitter for you.”

“……”

“Now go to sleep. No matter what you say, I’m going to stay right here by your side, so don’t even think about telling me to leave.”

Though her words were resolute, there was no reply.

Seriniel squinted her eyes and looked at Lexion, who quietly chuckled to himself.

“…It feels like I’ve become a child.”

“……”

“When I was actually a child, I couldn’t have imagined this…”

Instead of replying, Seriniel gently brushed aside the hair stuck to Lexion’s sweat-dampened forehead, as if she were truly caring for a child.

“You’ll continue to feel like a child from now on.”

Seriniel slowly moved her lips.

“Because I’m going to take care of you. Making a big fuss over every little scratch.”

She had thought that back then too.

She wished he’d always make a big deal out of things. That he’d fuss over even the smallest scratch as if it hurt terribly. As if he were someone completely unfamiliar with pain and injury…

Even now, it was no different.

She wanted to embrace the shadows left in his heart, the probably sorrowful and lonely days of his past. She wanted to take care of the young Lexion. To tell him he wasn’t alone anymore. That it was okay to feel pain as much as he needed.

“Ask the young Duke Lexion what else… there was that he couldn’t even imagine doing.”

“……”

“Let’s try doing them together, slowly, one by one after you’ve had a good sleep.”

For a moment, Lexion said nothing.

He simply gazed at Seriniel with eyes darkened by shadows. But it was a curious thing. His gaze no longer felt as ominous as it had before, nor did it feel frightening.

It only felt sad and pitiable.

Then Lexion slowly raised his hand. He carefully grasped Seriniel’s hand that was stroking his forehead, bringing it to his cheek, and spoke.

“…I’ve achieved it all.”

“……”

“Every single thing.”

It was the hand he needed the most, the heart he needed the most, and the person he needed the most.

The young Lexion, who had staggered, covered in blood, endlessly staring at the precious Viscount’s daughter in front of the grand Viscount’s mansion, had finally achieved all his dreams. The dreams that had seemed forever unattainable. The dreams he had told himself to give up on countless times for being too far-fetched.

So he wanted nothing more. Nothing at all.

“…Goodnight, Duke.”

Seriniel leaned in close and whispered gently into Lexion’s ear.

“Sleep well, without even dreaming.”

“……”

“Okay?”

…Okay.

Lexion gave a slight nod, and before long…

Whether it was the effect of the medicine or not, he closed his eyes.

⚜ ⚜ ⚜

Even after Lexion had fallen asleep, Seriniel did not leave his side, just as she had promised.

She gently stroked Lexion’s cheek with careful hands and secretly caressed his hand, which was twice the size of hers.

Thus, only the quiet sound of Lexion’s breathing filled the room.

‘…Thank goodness.’

Since Lexion wasn’t seriously injured, a good rest would help him recover quickly. Seriniel finally breathed a sigh of relief.

“……”

Holding Lexion’s hand tightly, Seriniel slowly looked around.

It was the first time she had stepped into Lexion’s living space. She had always stayed on the first floor.

The room was very simple, with only the bare minimum of furniture. She wondered if he had been uncomfortable in such a place. A belated feeling of guilt began to creep up on her.

…And it was after quite a while, lost in her own thoughts, that something caught Seriniel’s eye.

“……”

Her green eyes reflected the slightly open drawer of the nightstand.

Had he put something in there?

Perhaps it was something important that he kept separately.

Though she tried to divert her attention, her gaze kept returning to it.

Eventually, Seriniel carefully laid down Lexion’s hand and slowly stood up.

Then she quietly opened the nightstand drawer.

Inside, there was something familiar to Seriniel and a small notebook.

While she couldn’t identify the latter, she knew the former.

“This is…”

…the jewelry box from the study.

But why did he put it here?

With a puzzled expression, Seriniel quietly opened the jewelry box.

And immediately, she froze.

The item inside the box was something she knew very well.

It was an earring.

The one she had lost on her debutante day.

The one matching the one she still treasured.

Seriniel stared blankly at the earring in the box.

[Stop it. Bullying someone with so many people… what are you doing!]

Memories of that day slowly began to pass through Seriniel’s mind.

[Get up. Hurry…]

The cautious hand she had extended.

And the boy who had silently stared at that hand…

[Would you dance with me?]

They had danced together, in a mess.

[I’m Seriniel Verdellete. May I ask which family you belong to?]

[…I don’t have one of those.]

Now she understood.

Why the boy had said that.

Why he had turned away so coldly at her innocent question.

[Unfair? I don’t know what you mean by unfair. From the beginning, the one feeling unfair between us was always me.]

Seriniel knew well.

Before her parents passed away, between the youngest daughter of the peaceful and serene Verdelet family and the outcast bastard of the duke’s family…

There was a huge gap.

So he could never approach and always watched me from afar.

Always.

[You don’t know what that memory means to me. I don’t want to tell you myself. Because if you knew… you might pity me.]

And so, he was afraid.

[Maybe I deserved it. Maybe being beaten and bullied was so familiar that I didn’t even consider the possibility that it was… pitiful and miserable. That it was unattractive, disgusting.]

He was afraid that if she knew he was that boy, she too would see him as pitiful and miserable.

[Look at me for who I am. No matter what happens. And… no matter what you find out…]

…always pleading like that.

“You were here all along…”

She had thought she had lost it forever.

The other earring, and…

That boy who seemed endlessly lonely.

Seriniel’s fingers trembled as she touched the earring.

She couldn’t even begin to fathom it. The heart of Lexion, who had lived his whole life holding onto memories she herself had forgotten and his constant anxiety.

She felt like crying.

“……”

Seriniel put down the jewelry box and looked at the small notebook underneath it.

She slowly picked up the worn notebook.

And very carefully, she began to turn the pages.

Reading the sentences quietly, she soon realized that this notebook was Lexion’s diary. One he had probably used since he was young.

The diary wasn’t written in daily, just sporadically, recounting events Lexion had experienced.

– I saw you again today.

Among them…

– I thought I shouldn’t go, but I had nowhere to run.

There were entries written like letters.

…Times she had been completely unaware of, but that they had undoubtedly shared.

Seriniel’s emerald eyes reflected Lexion’s neat handwriting.