My Will Did Not Mean This

Vivian closed the last page of the diary. Her record, which lasted for seven years, ended when she coughed up blood and called her doctor.

 

‘I guess it was at this time that I received a terminal diagnosis. I struggled to escape the Duke’s grasp, but how futile it would be if the end was death.’

 

Vivian recalled the day she first became possessed. When she came to her senses, she was lying on the floor. There was a long rope and a fallen chair next to it, and the maids were screaming and looking for someone. It was so absurd at the time that she couldn’t even speak. But she never thought there would be a story like this.

 

“It tastes bitter.”

 

Vivian closed the diary. She felt as if she had been exposed to a secret she was not meant to know. But she couldn’t put the diary back like this. If she did that, the Duke might find her. She had a gut feeling that she shouldn’t pass this on to him at least.

 

“Oh, you haven’t thrown away that diary yet?”

 

As Vivian was struggling, the shrub in the garden suddenly split. Alex, who never appeared normally, stuck his head in between them.

 

“He bought it for me the day I decided to study abroad at the academy. It’s pretty old.”

 

“Do you remember all that?”

 

“Don’t ignore my memory.”

 

Vivian got up from the sofa, draping the shawl over his shoulders. Alex was already sitting on the bench. Driven by her unidentifiable mood, she handed the diary to Alex.

 

“Here, brother take it.”

 

“Huh? Why.”

 

“I wondered who would be qualified to have this diary, but no matter how I looked, it was only my brother.”

 

“I heard in the past that I didn’t like it even if I saw it and tried to console it.”

 

“I’m going to become a new person now. A different person than before.”

 

Aslan was busy, and it seemed like work was taking longer than expected. Vivian rested her chin leisurely.

 

“I’m thinking of taking the pressure off her shoulders and living a little more comfortably. Just go with the flow.”

 

“My brother and sister… I’ve been living too hard all this time. Then is this the body left by Vivian from the past?”

 

“Is that so?”

 

“Then let’s hold a funeral.”

 

Alex gathered nearby fallen tree branches and lit a fire without delay. Vivian’s eyes widened in surprise.

 

“Suddenly now?”

 

“It’s best to do anything when you make up your mind. Live without looking back at the past. I always wish my sister happiness.”

 

The old diary caught fire. Alex stretched her legs with a somewhat relaxed expression.

 

“So, let’s run away. If we cross the border, my father won’t be able to do anything about us.”

 

“This too is a bit sudden.”

 

“It’s not right for you to marry a bastard like the Margrave. I can’t tolerate dirt getting in my brother’s eyes. Let’s go and find a way to treat lung disease.”

 

Vivian was deeply moved. When she first met him, she felt a little sorry for being prejudiced against his extraordinary vocabulary. Moreover, before being dragged out of the banquet hall, Alex shouted:

 

‘Vivian is my younger sister that I raised. So, if Vivian is at fault, it’s only right that I take responsibility for raising her poorly!’

 

Vivian suddenly became curious.

 

“I told my father earlier that my brother would take responsibility. How was he going to take responsibility after all?”

 

“Ah, that.”

 

Alex shrugged his shoulders as if it was no big deal.

 

“I was planning on marrying the Margrave instead of you. We look alike because we are brother and sister, right? “It was probably time for the old man to come to the border, so he must have been deceived.”

 

“…”

 

Looking at Alex smiling brightly, Vivian felt her emotions evaporate a little.

 

‘Just don’t ask.’

 

No matter how early you regret, it is always too late. A few days have passed since then. Fortunately or unfortunately, none of Alex’s plans were implemented. Duke Eleonora, who was carrying out the Emperor’s secret mission, lost his footing on a cliff and fell to his death. The funeral was held quietly with only immediate family members gathered. Alex unexpectedly inherited the dukedom. Fortunately, Aslan, who had extensive political experience, did not spare any help both materially and spiritually, and the succession process proceeded smoothly. Iris was officially enrolled into the family, and Vivian received an invitation from someone he had never dreamed of.

 

It was an invitation from the emperor.

 

＊ ＊ ＊

 

The Grand Duke’s residence was noisy from early morning. This was because it was the day when Aslan and Vivian entered the palace under royal command. Vivian sat in front of the mirror in her negligee that she had just gotten out of. Maids gathered to serve.

 

“I’ll comb your hair. A massage will help you wake up.”

 

“Yes, I’m still sleepy.”

 

The woman in the mirror was beautiful no matter who saw her. Her eyes, nose, and mouth were tightly drawn together on her thin face. She was lovely with her white, round forehead, big doll-like eyes, sharp nose bridge, and lips as red as rose petals. Meanwhile, her slowly blinking eyelashes were like delicate butterfly wings. Her maids, who were admiring Vivian’s beauty, all bowed their heads to her. Aslan suddenly appeared, leaning against her doorway and staring at Vivian as if fascinated.

 

“…”

 

She handed over the combs to her maids and motioned for them all to leave. The occupants left without a sound, leaving only the two of them in the spacious bedroom. Vivian, who didn’t know that, was still struggling with the rushing water with her eyes closed.

 

“Hmm, why did it suddenly stop…”

 

“It’s all your fault.”

 

A low voice mixed with laughter. Surprised Vivian opened her eyes brightly. Aslan’s eyes met hers beyond the mirror, and her mouth curved in pleasure.

 

“You’re so beautiful that I can’t take my eyes off you.”

 

“When did you come?”

 

“Just now.”

 

He gently pushed Vivian to sit down as she tried to get up and started brushing her. Fine-grained platinum-blonde hair slipped through the brush smoothly.

 

“I’ve been getting so jealous lately, it’s a big problem.”

 

“Jealousy? Are you jealous?”

 

“I’m jealous of everyone around you. I can’t even stand the maid’s touch because it bothers me.”

 

“It’s a joke…”

 

Aslan has started telling strange jokes often these days. At first he pretended to smile a few times, but that was his limit now.

 

‘After being close to Alex, we are starting to resemble him in this way.’

 

Of course, there was a difference in that Alex was serious and not joking.

 

“How are you feeling?”

 

“Great.”

 

“Then I’ll do it for you every morning.”

 

“Wouldn’t it be a bother?”

 

“It’s not annoying. It’s my job.”

 

Vivian thought to herself, ‘Three days,’ but she didn’t show it outwardly. She was definitely cool because Aslan’s grip was better than her maid’s. But there was a side effect. His massage was so good that her muscles began to surge again. Vivian, who had almost fallen asleep without realizing it, suddenly washed her face dry.

 

“Ugh, you need to get ready to go out too. Can you waste your time on me?”

 

“Because I’m not a sleepyhead like everyone else.”

 

“You’re a sleepyhead. Could you just say that you are someone who sleeps a lot in the morning?”

 

“Tsk tsk, why don’t you open your eyes first.”

 

It was already trying to float. There was a limit to treating people like hibernating bears! Vivian opened her eyes wide.

 

“…?”

 

And she was a little embarrassed by the long silence. Aslan dressed up livery faithfully early in the morning. His bangs were neatly pulled up, and the cravat and handkerchief were perfectly angled.

 

‘Ugh, I can’t do that because I’m out of breath.’

 

Aslan was staring at Vivian with expectant eyes. When she looked closely, it looked like a cat waiting for praise from its owner. After thinking about it, Vivian came up with a greeting that suited the situation.

 

“You are very diligent. Even if you persecute me and call me a sleepyhead, I will admit it.”

 

“What?”

 

“You’ve already finished dressing up, but I’m just in a negligee and robe. But instead of rushing, I was just brushing my hair leisurely. I reflect.”

 

“…Why don’t you come over?”

 

Aslan played with his chin as if contemplating something important. Meanwhile, her maid, Emma, knocked and set down her medicine bowl. She also left out sweet chocolate for Vivian, who disliked bitter things.

 

“I’ll have breakfast soon.”

 

“Okay, let’s go out.”

 

Emma stepped away, and Vivian approached the aesthetic medicine bowl. It was not a cure for the condition, but rather a medicine that only slightly alleviated the symptoms. Knowing that a cure would come if she just held on for a while, it was really hard to eat it several times a day. Aslan suggested as Vivian looked here and there with the medicine in front of her.

 

“If you eat well, I’ll give you a gift.”

 

“Okay, so it’s chocolate, right?”

 

“We’ll have to wait and see.”

 

She learned only really strange things from Alex. Next time she saw her brother, she would have to firmly warn him not to treat him like a normal person.

 

“Ugh, use it!”

 

“That’s right.”

 

Aslan’s finger entered Vivian’s lips. After pushing the chocolate in, he touched his soft lips and smiled in satisfaction.

 

“Eating well.”

 

“Hmm, thank you for the chocolate.”

 

“If you tease me any more, I’ll get upset. Now I really have to give you a gift.”

 

Aslan led Vivian in front of the full-length mirror. He placed her in front of him, so small that she could easily be held in his arms, and took out a box from his inner pocket. It was a wide, flat box covered in blue rain.

 

Aslan eventually opened the box. It was a gorgeous necklace with large water drop diamonds hanging like grapes. Vivian was almost completely dazed by the insane size that could not even be calculated. Aslan’s eyes widened pleasantly.

 

“Do you like it?”

 

“What is this…?”

 

“Now that I think about it, I haven’t given you a proper engagement gift.”

 

Vivian recalled the clothes and accessories that filled her dressing room, the luxurious furniture that filled her bedroom, her carriage and three swords custom-made for her.

 

Aslan whispered, not knowing that Vivian was secretly feeling sorry for his memory.

 

“I will put it on you myself.”

 

A fine platinum foot gently passes over one of his shoulders. The thin, white nape of her neck and her thin, prominent collarbone were fully exposed. Aslan’s hand holding his necklace slowly reached out.

 

“Whoa, I can’t take my eyes off you.”

 

Surprisingly, it seemed that the necklace was difficult to attach and detach, Aslan hesitated for a while before finally taking his hand off. Vivian looked back and forth at her reflection in the mirror. When she just saw it, it was so flashy and shiny that she honestly felt uncomfortable, but when she actually wore it, it matched Vivian’s face very well.

 

Aslan seemed to have similar thoughts and clapped a couple of times.

 

“It was as good as I thought.”

 

“What do you think?”

 

“Aslan, you have a surprisingly good sense of vision, don’t you? When I first saw it, it was very burdensome…”

 

“There is no way I don’t know about you.”

 

“I like it. Thank you.”

 

When she praised him for being diligent earlier, his expression, which had been slightly distorted, became a sly smile again.

 

“But I can’t wear it today. I can’t be more extravagant than Her Majesty the Empress.”

 

Even at first glance, it seemed expensive. If she went out doing something like this, it was perfect for her to be criticized for disrespecting the Empress. She took off her necklace, which Aslan had put a lot of effort into, in one go.

 

“…Is this also a failure?”

 

Aslan’s expression was subtly downcast. Of course, the miracle of Vivian noticing it didn’t happen.

 

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Translator Note: