My Ex-Boyfriends Are Interfering With My Death

Chapter 1
Leave Me Alone! But No One Listened (1)

 

I need to die.

I panicked a bit, but this isn’t my first or second regression. It’s my hundredth time. I quickly found my bearings.

Yes, let’s die. I don’t know why, but I’ve returned to the past again, so dying will make things certain.

I fumbled inside my body, but there wasn’t enough magical power to end my life in an instant. I guess I’ll have to use this sword.

As I didn’t let go of the blade, the onlookers started to stir.

“Shouldn’t someone stop her?”

“That crazy Crowell?”

“Yeah, you go…”

But no one actually came close. All talk and no action.

I pulled the corners of my mouth into a crooked smile and completely snatched the sword from the guy facing me.

Thwack!

“Ugh!”

The guy who weakly lost his sword grimaced, holding his twisted wrist. I muttered to him softly.

“I’ll borrow this for a moment.”

Instead of waiting for a response, I raised my head. I really intended to borrow it for just ‘a moment’.

I aimed the properly gripped sword handle at my nape.

‘May I never wake up again.’

…It’s really time to stop now.

As I muttered this inwardly and was about to move my arm, at that moment.

“Stop!”

A sudden voice intervened, halting my action.

“……”

What? Who is it?

Of course, I had no intention of stopping just because someone said so. I didn’t even know who the voice belonged to.

At best, it was probably just one of the unfortunate students about to witness a person’s death for the first time in their lives.

However, the fact that I heard a voice calling out to me amidst this solid indifference made me hesitate for just a moment, which was my mistake.

Just before the sharp blade could move.

“Edith Crowell!”

“Ugh.”

A firm and strong hand forcefully stopped my wrist.

“Let go.”

“…..”

…How did he approach so quickly?

After briefly contesting strength with that hand, I finally gave up and lowered my wrist as the blade only swept through the air.

An irritated voice involuntarily burst out.

“…What is it?”

“Haa.”

For a brief moment, my gaze intertwined with navy blue eyes glinting between determinedly furrowed brows. They were very calm and clear eyes.

At the same time, I realized the identity of this uninvited guest.

‘Ah.’

The strength left my hand. He didn’t miss the opportunity and in the blink of an eye, stepped on the blade, fixing it to the ground.

Clang!

There was a chilling sound of metal being crushed.

After completely crumpling the blade with just the heel of his boot, he scoffed, gesturing at what was now just a piece of scrap metal.

“…Were you trying to end your life with something like that?”

It was a usable sword before you stepped on it. Swallowing those words, I quietly answered.

“…Yes. I was trying to die with that thing.”

I know this boy.

So, the fact that he interfered with my death filled me more with bewilderment than anger.

Because… the person I know has no reason to do so.

The sole son of the Behemoth ducal family, Ethan Behemoth.

He is a once-in-a-lifetime knight with genius-level sword skills, who becomes a hero as renowned as me in every moment of regression.

If I was called a great mage loved by magic, he was called the model for all knights who wield a sword.

And he had a slightly infamous nickname too.

The War Maniac.

It was said that in the subjugations he led, the real busywork was dealing with the pile of corpses he left behind rather than the monsters he killed.

Standing atop the pile of corpses he had cut down, his black hair soaked in blood, lifting his head to look for the next thing to cut—his appearance was no different from a murderous ghost.

…And, he was once my lover too.

 

“Let’s break up.”

“…Edith Crowell, what did you say?”

“The world could end at any time, so what’s the point of this childish game? So, I said we should stop.”

 

He was the past lover to whom I had unilaterally declared our breakup.

But now it’s all gone.

The fact that Ethan Behemoth was my lover.

The fact that I loved him, and he loved me.

Because everything that happened before the regression vanished without a trace.

I almost wavered at the familiar face, but calmly asked back.

“Why are you interfering? Young Lord Behemoth.”

“Why are you trying to die?”

“Is that any of your business?”

At my sharp retort, he seemed to lose his words for a moment and closed his mouth tightly.

“I…”

At that moment, a noisy sound spread among the onlookers who had been silently watching this new development.

‘Excuse me, let me through.’ A voice was heard, and then someone else popped out from the crowd.

A boy with wide-open eyes shouted at Ethan.

“Ethan! Wait, what’s this situation?”

“And who might you be?”

When I snapped back sharply, my nerves on edge, the boy’s head shrank apologetically.

The hand resting on his scabbard scratched the back of his head as if embarrassed.

“Ethan suddenly ran this way in the middle of our duel. I was so surprised I followed him, but…”

He trailed off, slowly looking around again. His voice gradually faded.

“Why are so many people gathered here? And isn’t that guy a knight? Why is he dueling with you, a mage…?”

As soon as his gaze fell on my face, his expression turned pale.

“Wait, that blood on your face…. This wasn’t a duel.”

He’s more perceptive than Ethan Behemoth.

Because it’s rare to see blood in a normal duel.

At this time, I was at odds with almost all the students in the academy. To the extent that no one would step forward to stop me from taking my own life.

As he finished speaking, he fixed his gaze on my cheeks and hands where blood was dripping.

Ethan Behemoth’s gaze also finally brushed over my cheek and moved to my hands.

“You, your hand… what happened?”

I’m too annoyed to bother talking. How dare they interfere with my death.

When I raised an eyebrow with an expression that showed I had no intention of answering, Ethan Behemoth changed his target. He glared at the guy who had awkwardly backed away.

“You.”

“…..!!”

The guy who was called out made an expression like he might bite his tongue and die right there.

“Did you cut her?”

The guy desperately shook his head.

It’s not his fault since I held it in my own hand.

His cowering appearance was amusing. I deliberately spoke slowly.

“…Whatever it is, it’s none of your business. You there.”

I jerked my chin towards the boy who had barged in.

“Hm? Me?”

“Yes. Please take Young Lord Behemoth and leave.”

“…Maybe we should. We’d better leave, Ethan.”

Fortunately, he’s perceptive. Would you just get lost already?

But unlike the light response of the seemingly good-natured boy, Ethan Behemoth’s voice was still very low. His discomfort was palpable in every syllable.

“Even though Edith Crowell tried to end her life right here, Ian.”

“…What?”

The boy called Ian looked back at me with a surprised expression.

“…..”

I just shrugged my shoulders.

Ian seemed to think this situation was just bullying through a duel.

And even amidst all this, Ethan Behemoth’s gaze didn’t leave me. It was a gaze twice as persistent and heavy as those of the onlookers.

…Why?

“Look, whatever I do is none of your business. Just go about your day.”

Come to think of it, this is doubly unfair. Why are they needlessly stopping me?

This wasn’t just a case of stopping someone from dying in front of them.

To approach on their own and snatch away my sword when so many students were already standing by—this action must have a ‘reason’ beyond mere righteousness.

So, what’s your ‘reason’? If it’s not a reason that can convince me, I’ll end this life by dying with you.

I glared back at Ethan Behemoth.

“…Ugh!”

But immediately, a migraine that felt like it was splitting my skull seemed to strike through my head. When I pressed my forehead, all my strength suddenly drained away.

‘What am I doing right now?’

In fact, all of this was a clear problem that would be solved once I died.

I just need to die. If I die…

After hundreds of repetitions of regression, death had become my inertia.

But why are you complicating things when you know nothing?

The unwelcome connection before my eyes was irritating.

In hundreds of regressions, this was the first time Ethan Behemoth had grabbed my ankle at this point, so even more…

…Huh?

Right. It’s the first time.

Why did this happen in the first place?

Something, some part feels awkward and strange… there’s a point I’m forgetting.

Something important has gone awry.

…My head hurt more, and I rubbed my face hard.

I’m annoyed. I’m so annoyed I could die.

I quickly shoved Ethan Behemoth’s shoulder.

“Move aside. And give me a new sword to replace the one you crushed. Any will do.”

“If I give you one, will you try to die again?”

“…”

Of course, his shoulder, hard as stone, didn’t budge at all. And among the still onlookers, there was no one to help me.

A grinding sound came from my teeth involuntarily.

“Seriously. What. Does it. Matter to you? I’ll handle my own life. You two should quickly—”

“What do you mean, what business! We’re in the same group for the subjugation practice this time.”

“…What?”

“…Huh? You didn’t know?”

Along with Ian, who suddenly interjected with an answer, I ended up blurting out a stupid sound.

Ethan Behemoth muttered quietly as he took my hand off his shoulder.

“You didn’t even know we’re in the same group?”

“……”

Of course, I remembered that he and I had participated in the subjugation practice together.

I was confident in my memory to the point where I knew very clearly how each of the hundreds of past events had started, how they had gone wrong, and even which people were involved.

Right now, my reason was just a bit clouded due to the headache.

“Wait…”

So it’s not that I was suddenly surprised by a fact I already knew.

But my heart started pounding fiercely, as if it was about to somersault. I swallowed a gasp and raised my trembling hand to my chest.

My heartbeat was running wild. It was an unfamiliar sensation.

It was a feeling I had for the first time since I had come to know all the events after the regression like the back of my hand.

I grabbed the boy who had spilled the important information and asked urgently again. Ian, was it?

“…Sir Ian. Today is… still before the subjugation practice?”

Ian looked me over as if I were crazy and answered frankly.

“Yeah. It’s in two days… Are you sick?”

“…You’ve definitely been strange since earlier.”

Amidst the gazes of the two falling on me, I simply couldn’t calm down.

Of course, I couldn’t.

It was during the academy’s subjugation practice that I was cursed, which became the cause of my countless regressions!

But it’s still before the subjugation practice?

The migraine spread to my eyelids.

The part I had been missing.

‘So this was it.’

The curse I was under was one where if I died for any reason before seeing the ‘end’, I would always return to ‘the day after being cursed’.

…It’s maddening enough that I finally succeeded in dying from the curse but regressed without dying.

Even the regression point is a mess.

To think it was before I was cursed. Why?

🥀

Thank you for reading! ♡