Mental Caretaker In An Apolcalypse Game

Episode 32

After parting with her, I was silently retracing the path I had come from. I had to stop short when I saw the blood-soaked floor and a lump that seemed to have swollen from filling its belly. The sight made me pause, and I had to bite my lip to suppress the urge to vomit the moment I saw it. I soon turned my head away, averting my gaze, and continued walking forward.

“… .”

Not long after, I stopped again, hesitated, and finally turned to look back. She kept popping into my head, and I just couldn’t make her disappear. To be honest, I didn’t know if what I was doing now was the right thing, and the scene I had just seen overlapped with her in my mind and made me feel ill at ease.

“Ha, damn it… What am I supposed to do?”

Would it be the right choice to leave her behind and go find Do-yoon? This was no different from sitting on the sidelines and watching her die.

“There’s no choice, right? What difference would it make if I followed her? We’d both end up dead.”

Wasn’t it better for at least one person to live rather than both dying? So…

‘Damn it. This is exactly what that guy who just died said.’

The realization that my thoughts were the same as that guy’s excuses made me feel even more disgusted.

“…Yeah. In the end, I’m no different from that guy. Humans are all the same. They’re selfish and only care about their own lives.”

In truth, my heart had already left her. She was being so emotional and couldn’t even tell what kind of path she was on, heading to her own death. I was better off without her as a burden. He was better—quiet, obedient, and listened well. In the first place, her abilities weren’t that great compared to Do-yoon’s. It didn’t matter much if there was a tanker like her or not. A dealer with strong firepower would be better. So it was only right to leave her behind and go find him. Even after reaching that conclusion, I was still hesitating and dragging my feet.

“Damn it all, this is a gamble. I don’t like to venture into uncertainty while leaving behind what’s certain…!”

His life or death were at stake here. I currently did not know if he was dead or alive. If I abandoned her to go find him and ended up finding only his dead body, everything would go wrong from that point on. Confirming his death and going to her late would mean she would likely be dead by then too. That meant my chance of survival would also be gone.

My steps were heavy while I feared the possibility of such a worst-case scenario happening. Wouldn’t it be better to stick with her, who I knew was still alive, rather than going to find him whose fate I didn’t know? Even if it meant clinging to her legs and dragging her along, somehow convincing her or coming up with a better plan to keep her from dying. I even considered the last resort of kneeling and begging.

This dilemma arose solely because of my innate nature to seek stability rather than adventure.

“Ah, fuck it! I really don’t know.”

In the end, my head got so complicated that it felt like it was about to burst. I roughly tousled my hair and let out a deep sigh.

“Yes, let’s go find Do-yoon. In the first place, it was foolish to even think so much about this. Seo Ga-eun is just an assistant at best, and the protagonist is Lee Do-yoon. You should compare what needs to be compared.”

Having finally made up my mind, I turned my body firmly and looked in the direction I had parted with him earlier.

This was no time for me to worry. I needed to find him quickly before he lost his mind from using his abilities recklessly. With that thought, I moved forward with lighter steps than before.

***

I think it was here somewhere…

Returning to the place where the main zombie’s leg was, I looked around, hoping he might still be there. However, no matter how desperately I searched, I couldn’t see him. Instead, I witnessed a horrifying scene that I didn’t want to see.

“No way… It’s already like that?”

The flesh that had been melting away appropriately was now completely gone, and the white bones were exposed. More than half of the leg was in that state. If the leg was like this, it was easy to imagine what the torso and head would look like without even seeing them.

“Damn it! At this rate, it’s going to transition to Phase 2 and we’ll all die!”

I was already worried sick about his condition, and the situation was deteriorating to the worst possible outcome. I couldn’t let it transition to Phase 2 under any circumstances. I had to somehow finish it off before that happened.

Feeling anxious, I looked in a panic. I regained my senses when the main zombie moved, about to turn the place into a mess again, and dodged. Maybe because I was so distracted, my body wouldn’t listen properly.

Nevertheless, with the single tenacity to survive, I barely managed to escape the range of the falling debris. I stood stiffly, watching the main zombie stomp. With each thud of its rolling leg, the flesh attached to it fell off in clumps. I quickly covered my mouth and dry heaved. The disgusting and horrifying sight turned my stomach, and my mind was a mess with worry about what to do if all the flesh fell off and Phase 2 began.

‘Lee Do-yoon Where the hell are you? I need to find him quickly. Quickly…’

I wonder if my wish reached him. The trace of him I was desperately searching for appeared before my eyes.

“That’s…!”

Through the dust caused by the falling debris, I caught sight of a black bird flying around. In this situation, the sight of a bird skillfully avoiding the falling debris and flying leisurely through the air felt out of place. It was definitely a bird he had created from shadows. If so, wasn’t he nearby?

“DO-YOON! LEE DO-YOON!”

I called out his name loudly just in case. I put as much strength as I could into my stomach to shout loudly, but I was worried it had been drowned out by the surrounding noise. Just as I was about to shout again, I met the gaze of the black bird, which was looking directly at me. Then, relieved to see the bird flying towards me, I looked around once more. The fact that the bird was coming this way meant it had heard my voice. That meant he was around here…

“Ah…!”

As the bird reached within inches of my face, I reached out my hand. The creature gently landed on it and, as if playing a trick, lightly bit my hand without causing pain. Then it flew down to my feet and entered my shadow. The shadow wriggled and moved, and instead of the bird, a tiger suddenly popped out. The creature grabbed the hem of my clothes with its mouth, as if telling me to follow it. Thinking it was leading me to where he was, I followed the tiger.

***

“Oof! Just a moment…!”

“Noona…”

For a while now, he’d been clinging on to me as if we were long-lost family reuniting. I was very glad to see him again too, but when he hugged me so tightly and stuck to me like this, that feeling quickly disappeared.

“I can’t breathe!”

“I was so scared I might lose you again. I’m so glad you’re alive.”

“No, you’re really killing me here.”

Was he going to kill me by suffocating when I barely made it here?!

Despite this hectic situation, my eyes carefully examined his condition. Fortunately, he didn’t seem to have any serious injuries.

“Are you hurt anywhere? Did anything happen while you were alone?”

“Do you know how hard it was being alone after being separated from you, noona? I was so worried I almost went crazy. I should carry you around in my arms to prevent this from happening again. Or maybe I should tie you up with a rope?”

“I guess you’re not hurt.”

I asked just in case, but seeing that he was talking nonsense, he seemed to be fine. His mental state, to this extent, was similar to his usual slightly crazy self.

“Stop the nonsense and let go of me for now. We don’t have time for this.”

“Nonsense? I mean it, you know? Hmm?”

“Stop talking bullshit. What madman walks around tying people up with ropes? Do you have no common sense? Am I a dog? Are you going to put a dog collar on me?”

When I heard all his bizarre talk about walking around while tied up, I scoffed and said sarcastically. However, contrary to what I’d intended to happen, his eyes widened.

“Can I do that?”

“Of course not, you crazy bastard!”

As soon as I saw him take it as a sincere proposition, I lost my sarcastic smile and barely managed to hold back a string of curses as I replied. I corrected myself: he wasn’t normal, he had gone nuts. He seemed to have lost his mind a little bit. How much did he use his abilities to end up like this?

“Why not! You mentioned it like it was a possibility first-!”

“When did I say it’s possible!”

Correction again: his mental state wasn’t just a little off, it was completely gone. Now he was also hearing things he wanted to hear.

“Then how about tying it around my neck? And you hold onto it, sister. But you can’t let go.”

“Enough! I wouldn’t take something like that even if you gave it to me!”

I genuinely wondered what his brain structure was like at this point. Didn’t he say nonsense about wanting to bite my neck, and when I said no, he told me to bite him instead before? Now he was saying he’d wear a collar himself and wanted me to hold the leash. I doubted whether these thoughts could really come from the mind of a normal human being.

“Come to think of it, sister, your neck is pretty, so I think you’ll look good in anything you wear… If you don’t like a leash, how about a choker?”

“…I was wrong. I shouldn’t have brought such a thing up… It was my mouth that was wrong.”

So please stop focusing on my neck!

I silently screamed inside under his intense gaze.

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LOL he’s completely nuts, love that

btw, I’m sorry for the delayed/irregular updates. Uni is kinda breaking my back