Episode 38

A faint smile flickered across Kyle’s lips before disappearing.

The real question was whether Rosanna could adapt to a life of simplicity. Clergy were expected to lead modest, humble lives, and that extended to their families if they were married. This was one of the reasons clergymen were less desirable as marriage prospects among the gentry.

A noblewoman, with nothing to lose, wouldn’t willingly give up her luxuries to marry a clergyman.

‘Would she truly be happy by my side?’

Then again, there was no guarantee she would even accept his proposal. His premature excitement was only setting him up for emotional whiplash.

Was it his anxiety making him spiral like this? Whenever Kyle tried to think about the future, his thoughts rushed far ahead of him, out of control. This wasn’t the time for daydreaming; he should be focused on the present. It was all because of that strange dream. It left him restless and unable to think clearly about Rosanna, his heart endlessly stirring at the thought of her.

‘Get it together, Kyle.’

Chiding himself, Kyle refocused on his duties and approached a visitor in need of assistance.

By the time he threw himself into his work, the charity bazaar was nearing its end. Most of the tents had sold out their goods and were starting to pack up. The proceeds from each stall were collected at the central operations tent for tallying.

Soon after, the total revenue was announced, and the crowd erupted in cheers. The event had been a resounding success.

“Well done.”

“You too. You’ve been running around non-stop.”

“It’s worth it, seeing everyone so happy.”

Kyle and his classmates exchanged small talk as they worked on cleanup. Folding up the tents, gathering them in one spot, and tidying the courtyard kept them busy, but the extra hands made the work manageable. Even during cleanup, the laughter and chatter continued to fill the air.

As the event wound to its conclusion, a shadow fell over Kyle as he picked up litter. Looking up, he saw Rosanna smiling down at him, her eyes crinkling with amusement.

“All finished?”

Kyle stood, and though their eye levels shifted, his heart didn’t feel the same. Rosanna was always above him in every way.

“You said we’d talk later.”

“Yes… I did.”

Rosanna seemed to notice the turmoil written on his face. Her eyes narrowed slightly in curiosity.

“You’re acting really strange today.”

When she reached out toward him, Kyle flinched instinctively, pulling back before she could even touch him.

“Ah, it’s just… there are people watching.”

His words trailed off, and his gaze wandered aimlessly, avoiding hers. Rosanna’s gray-blue eyes turned cold, their warmth replaced by an icy gleam.

“Then let’s move somewhere else.”

Rosanna turned and began walking toward the back of the cathedral, her steps brisk. As she moved, she kicked a loose stone on the path, the action betraying her irritation. Kyle followed, guilt washing over him. He couldn’t tell if she was simply venting her feelings or if her actions were a plea for him to understand her hurt. Either way, it pained him to think he’d upset her with his behavior today.

Kyle’s restless nights and uncertain future were his own burdens, ones Rosanna couldn’t possibly understand. Yet instead of addressing his feelings or keeping them to himself gracefully, he’d spent the day dodging her warmth. For someone as fiery as Rosanna, his behavior must have been deeply frustrating.

“Rosanna.”

Kyle gently caught her hand as it swung mid-air, stopping her in her tracks. When she turned toward him, he noticed her satin shoes, now smudged with dirt. The short dress she wore revealed the scuffed toes prominently.

“This way.”

He led her to a small garden nestled between the cathedral and the seminary. Once there, Kyle motioned for her to sit on a bench near the bushes. Kneeling in front of her, he carefully supported her ankle and said, “Pardon me,” as he examined her shoe.

Fashionable as it was, the delicate footwear had fared poorly.

“What are you inspecting so closely?”

“I was worried you might’ve hurt yourself… The toe of your shoe is dented from a stone.”

“Just toss them.”

“Does your foot hurt?”

Even as he spoke, Kyle kept his gaze firmly fixed on her feet. Rosanna, unable to hold back, cupped his chin and tilted his head upward.

“When you keep looking at the ground instead of me, all you notice are things like that.”

Kyle’s ash-gray eyes wavered, his lips parting as though he wanted to say something. Finally, he managed a single sentence.

“I’m sorry for acting so strangely today.”

His fumbling honesty was endearing, though it sometimes drove Rosanna to exasperation. But whenever she looked at him, her irritation softened. She couldn’t even bring herself to get mad. If he was using his face as a weapon, it would’ve been a cunning ploy. But knowing Kyle, it wasn’t intentional.

Watching him fuss over her as if a small stone kick could have seriously injured her left her feeling both amused and disarmed.

“Why? Is something bothering you?”

“That’s… I’m not sure how to sort it out yet. But I promise I’ll tell you later.”

Rosanna’s expression made it clear she wasn’t entirely satisfied with his answer. Still, she relented with a flick of her eyes.

“I’ll let it go this time. Sit.”

Once Kyle settled beside her, an awkward silence hung between them.

This wasn’t the scene Rosanna had envisioned. She’d planned for a cheerful reunion, a warm exchange of smiles, and a moment to brighten his day with a thoughtful gift. She couldn’t let things end on such a somber note.

Right, as long as the ending was good. That was what mattered.

With that resolve, Rosanna reached into her handbag and retrieved a small velvet box.

“Remember? I said I’d bring you a gift next time we met. Here, take it.”

“Thank you.”

Kyle accepted the box, running his fingers over its luxurious surface. It was unlike anything he’d ever received before.

“If anyone saw you, they’d think I just gave you the box itself. Open it.”

The moment Kyle spent appreciating the gift seemed excruciatingly slow to Rosanna, whose impatience often got the better of her. Before she could urge him again, he opened the box to reveal its contents.

It was a rosary. The cross was intricately designed in a Gothic style reminiscent of the cathedral’s spire, and the white beads had a subtle sheen. They felt smooth under his fingers, promising a comforting touch during prayer. It was a breathtaking gift, one that drew a quiet exclamation of awe from him.

“I love it. Truly. It’s such a meaningful gift.”

“I got it in Hookpool. It’s a souvenir.”

“Hookpool? The harbor town? You went on a trip with your family?”

Rosanna’s smile concealed the truth. There was no need to mention that she’d been there with Raymond, taking down a smuggling gang.

“They said it’s made from whale bone. Isn’t that unique?”

“Whale bone… That’s incredible.”

Kyle wrapped the rosary around his hand, his attention absorbed by the intricate craftsmanship. Seeing his genuine reaction made Rosanna feel that the gift had been worth it.

After a while, Kyle broke the silence, turning his gaze toward her. His gray-blue eyes gleamed like crystal today, clear and striking.

“Thank you, Rosanna.”

“If you’re grateful, then…”

“Huh?”

His puzzled eyes widened in surprise as Rosanna closed her own. Her intentions were unmistakable. Her bold demand left him feeling as though he’d be a terrible man if he didn’t comply. The mere thought of touching her left him overwhelmed, but there was no escaping this moment.

Though this part of the garden was rarely visited, Kyle glanced around to make sure they were alone. Slowly, he leaned toward her. As he drew closer, a delicate scent wafted from her, and even that felt like a stimulus his body couldn’t ignore. If he hesitated any longer, he feared he might make an irreparable mistake.

Closing his eyes, Kyle pressed his lips against Rosanna’s. The kiss was fleeting and feather-light, hardly more than a brush of lips.

Before he could even process the sensation, Rosanna’s hand gripped the back of his neck.

“That doesn’t count.”

“What?”

“You already did that. At the lake. There’s supposed to be progress.”

“What are you…?”

Rosanna didn’t let him finish. Pulling him closer, she claimed his lips again. Her tongue traced along his teeth before slipping inside, leaving Kyle helpless to her bold advance. Unsure how to respond, he let her guide him, struggling to keep up. The wet sounds of their kiss—slick and intimate—left him embarrassed, but there was no escape. Her arms tightened around his neck, holding him firmly in place.

When Rosanna briefly pulled back, she nibbled lightly on his lips—a playful punishment for his earlier attempt to evade her. It wasn’t long before her tongue sought his again, and their fervent exchange resumed.

Kyle’s heart pounded wildly, the beat reverberating through his entire body. The intensity sent blood rushing downward, igniting a familiar heat he desperately tried to suppress. He needed to stop this now. If he pushed her away, there might still be time to regain control. He could quell his physical urges and hide the shameful, animalistic side of himself before it fully surfaced.

You don’t want to get caught, Kyle.

His rational mind kept whispering warnings, but his body had already rebelled against control. Slowly, his thoughts dissolved into blank whiteness, leaving only raw desire behind.

Kyle let go of his tangled thoughts and wrapped his arms around Rosanna’s waist. Tilting his head, their kiss deepened, their lips locking more firmly. The exchange of breath and mingling saliva was intoxicatingly sweet, and the friction of their entwined tongues was searing. The sensation of unity, as if they were becoming one, overwhelmed him. Pain throbbed from his arousal, trapped painfully in his trousers. Just as he reached his breaking point, a sliver of reason managed to surface.

“…Stop. We can’t go any further.”

“That was enough,” Rosanna replied, her face radiating satisfaction. Unlike Kyle, whose chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath, she looked completely composed. The only sign of their kiss was the sheen on her flushed lips, now slightly swollen.

Kyle leaned his head back, staring at the sky in an attempt to regain his composure. The dusky twilight overhead offered a fleeting sense of calm, but the moment was short-lived. When his hand brushed against the rosary still wrapped around his fingers, its weight suddenly felt heavier. He’d gripped a sacred object while succumbing to impure thoughts and desires. The realization struck him like a blow.

As his excitement faded, shame took its place.

“Should we go? They’re probably looking for me.”

“You go ahead… No, wait. It’s dark now, so we should go together. Just… let’s stay a little longer.”

Kyle lightly tugged at Rosanna’s sleeve as she moved to stand, careful not to let his hand brush her skin. Catching his nervous, deliberate movements, she sat back down on the bench. Her gaze slid from his face to the center of his lap, where the source of his embarrassment was poorly hidden.

Rosanna’s lips curved into a playful smile.

“All right. I’ll wait.”

 

 

 

 

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