Episode 27

After finishing my meal, I dismissed the servants and stood alone by the window. It was about time for Apollion to pass by.

Lately, my daily routine revolved entirely around Apollion. I needed to know when, where, and what he was doing at all times.

In the first few days, I used the excuse of being shown around the mansion to follow him everywhere.

However, Apollion turned into a stiff, clunky robot whenever he was near me, so I couldn’t keep that up for long.

Next, I called on Wilson to get detailed updates on Apollion’s every move.

Being a good butler, Wilson answered all my questions diligently, but it wasn’t practical to have Wilson shadowing me all day.

So, my next tactic was to observe Apollion from a distance.

Apollion, a new noble of the new country, was very diligent and had a highly regular routine.

He woke up at the crack of dawn for training, then had breakfast, took a thirty-minute break in his room, and then headed to the stables to check on the horses.

This was his typical morning routine.

Since he had to pass by where I was to get from his room to the stables, I often watched him from the window as he made his way there.

After checking on his horses and giving them plenty of affection, Apollion would head to his office.

Then, he would stay buried in work until lunchtime.

Since I couldn’t disturb him at his work, I didn’t go to his office.

Instead, I spent my time waiting eagerly for Apollion until lunch.

“There he is.”

I sat on a chair by the window, looking down at Apollion striding by.

He naturally had a long stride. Maybe because of his long legs, each step he took looked like he was using some sort of magical stepping technique. He walked so quickly that, from a distance, he seemed to be flying.

Although today he was walking slower than usual, his pace was still too fast for me to catch up with. Why was he always in such a hurry?

I gazed at his hair, which shimmered a deep purple in the sunlight. With each step, his hair bounced and settled in rhythm.

Today, he was wearing a light blue tunic. Unlike his usual preference for dull colors, seeing him in such a bright color felt oddly refreshing.

But a handsome man looks good in any color. The light hue, reminiscent of the summer sky, suited him perfectly.

I chuckled, remembering how I had once begged him to wear bright colors.

At that moment, he paused and turned in my direction. Our eyes met, and his round, blueberry-colored eyes locked with mine.

I waved at him, and he raised his hand in a timid, shy greeting. His neck, touched by sunlight, glowed a soft pink.

“Pink…”

I felt faint.

Watching him glow like a June peach, I sighed.

He’s already this cute, but how shockingly adorable would he be without the mask? The thought made my heart race, and I felt like breaking the window.

In the meantime, he turned around and disappeared from my view, presumably heading to the stables.

I watched his round head fade into the distance before closing the window.

“…I’m bored.”

I rested my chin on the windowsill for about ten minutes, letting a feeling of boredom and ennui take over.

Saying it out loud made the feeling even more pronounced. I was utterly bored.

With Apollion gone to do his duties, I had nothing to do. From now until lunchtime, I had to spend time alone in this spacious room.

I slowly rolled my eyes away from the floor and scanned the room.

A rocking chair by the unlit fireplace, a small side table in front of it, and a lone white vase on top. Familiar yet unfamiliar objects filled my view.

These items might be very familiar to Petunia, but to the ordinary ‘me,’ they were completely foreign. How many Koreans keep rocking chairs in their homes?

Massage chairs would be more familiar to Koreans than rocking chairs.

Lost in such trivial thoughts, I stopped thinking and plopped onto the bed.

From there, I could see the ceiling fan spinning lazily. The slight breeze it generated made my bangs flutter.

The mansion was quiet in the late morning. Besides the occasional bird or wind, there was no other noise.

After about twenty minutes, I heard the muffled sound of maids chatting outside the window.

I got up slowly at the sound and headed to the open terrace.

Leaning against the terrace railing, I saw the maids carrying heaps of laundry towards the laundry room in the annex.

Despite carrying loads as big as their bodies, they were all smiles, stumbling under the weight but quickly laughing and continuing on.

“I’m jealous.”

I muttered as I watched them.

Being so idle made me envy even the simplest tasks.

“…”

No, what I actually envied was their simple, everyday lives.

Talking to each other without hesitation, answering without reservations.

Laughing together over trivial matters, sharing each other’s unremarkable daily lives.

These were the humble things I wanted.

But what I once thought was ordinary and insignificant was now incredibly difficult for me to achieve.

Who in this grand mansion would dare chat casually with the grand duchess?

When I spoke to them, they bowed their heads and lowered themselves.

Even if we conversed, they tried to keep the topics dignified and refined, never speaking of who was dating whom among the servants or what novels were popular these days.

Selena, the maid, often became my conversation partner, but she was still under me.

Every word she spoke was considerate of my status and mood, and she never ventured beyond that boundary.

Apollion was the person I could have the most intimate conversations with in this mansion, but he was too reticent.

He rarely kept people around and wasn’t one to have comfortable chats with others. Expecting him to be a conversation companion was clearly my own selfish desire.

Everything good had its downsides.

From waking up in the morning until falling asleep at night, a life where all conveniences were tilted in my favor provided comfort but also left me feeling lonely.

“But so what.”

I pouted and wrapped myself in the curtain hanging on the terrace.

Living like this, I would soon be found as a cobweb-covered mummy. The solitude, boredom, and loneliness were unbearable.

In novels or dramas, female protagonists who rise from commoners to noblewomen often surprise the servants by doing chores or sewing without being asked.

As an ordinary reader or viewer, I never understood why they went out of their way to suffer. But now that I’m experiencing it myself, I understand their feelings a hundred, no, a thousand times over.

Of course, I had no interest in cleaning or sewing, and I knew that my busy movements would only make the servants more uncomfortable.

So, I didn’t engage in any futile labor to break this boredom.

However, knowing this didn’t make the boredom disappear.

Is this how Rapunzel felt, isolated alone in a tower? If only there was someone to talk to, I would have let down my hair.

“I was too naive.”

The problem was that I took being transported to another world too lightly.

Even if the world I’m in is the setting of a book, the fact remains that this is my reality now.

Reality is neither a novel nor a game.

Time doesn’t just skip over to important events, and there’s no skip button to bypass tedious episodes.

There may be time that flows meaninglessly, but there’s no time that bypasses me.

I realized this far too late.

And upon realizing it, I felt intensely bored and lonely.

Humans are social animals, after all.

I thought I could handle being alone since I was a homebody. But adapting to an environment where everyone catered to me was too difficult.

I briefly regretted coming to the grand duchy, but it was only a fleeting thought.

Staying at the Incladove Count’s estate would have been just as uncomfortable. There, more people knew the pre-possession Petunia, and there would be more people questioning my every action.

If I was going to be lonely and bored either way, it was better to be at the grand duchy where fewer people knew the pre-possession Petunia.

Still, I had come all the way here, relying solely on my husband in a foreign land. It felt a bit sad to think Apollion was being too cold to me.

But I had come here with the decision to understand and accept him. I couldn’t complain now.

People often compare the human heart to a door, but our hearts aren’t like iron doors. A little squeakiness can’t be fixed with some oil.

You have to disassemble it piece by piece, look inside to see what’s wrong, and repeatedly adjust the joints until they fit perfectly. That’s the nature of the human heart.

If the walls between us were so easy to break down, there wouldn’t be novels about protagonists overcoming hardships and adversity.

“Ah, my head hurts.”

Thinking deeply for the first time in a while made my head throb as if a cramp had set in.

I was amazed at how deep my thoughts could go.

I shook my head to clear out the lingering thoughts. Then, I ran to the dressing room and put on some comfortable outdoor shoes.

When there’s nothing to do and too much to think about, a walk is the answer.