Rex Begonia visited me several times after that.
Other things like sending letters sprayed with lavender perfume, or giving dresses or accessories you won’t wear as gifts.
It would have been better if it had ended that way.
He didn’t consider my schedule at all and only visited the Count’s house when it was okay for him.
When he came, his aunt always smiled strangely and was busy leaving the place.
He seemed to have misunderstood something when he saw Rex Begonia coming to see me all the time.
Even today, I had to endure the burdensome look in his eyes in the lab where we were alone.
“How long do you think I’ll keep pleasing you?”
“…Yes?”
When has he ever matched my mood?
I thought about it carefully to see if I had missed it. But that didn’t exist in my memory.
“I can give you everything. A room that cannot be compared to a small laboratory like this. Luxurious furniture. A maid who reacts to every word you say. Dress? Jewel? Just say it.”
“What about the Duchess’ position?”
In fact, there was not the slightest interest in the duchess’ position. But I knew that was what Rex Begonia could not give me.
“Except for that.” I snorted.
“You easily use the phrase that everything can be given to you.”
He has many half-siblings.
Although he was the only legitimate child born to a duchess, the duke did not give him preferential treatment.
To Duke Begonia, he was just one of many children.
Even though he has now taken the position of successor, he has not yet taken over the position of duke.
The current Duke of Begonia was too sturdy to pass on the title. I had no idea how the game would change as the other brothers grew up.
Therefore, he had to get help from his wife’s family through an arranged marriage with a lady with a strong background.
So there is no way that you can make me your duchess.
“If you’ve seen my face enough, I want you to leave now. I also have my own routine.”
“….”
I stood up first, looking at him staring at me in silence. Rex Begonia suddenly grabbed my arm.
Did you say you learned how to use a sword?
When he, who was three years older than me, put pressure on his hand, I couldn’t move.
“I’m starting to get a little annoyed.”
“You can give it to me.”
It looks like it’s already being paid.
I swatted him away rather roughly with my free hand.
“…Did you hit me now?”
In an instant, the expression disappeared from Rex Begonia’s face and his eyes rolled back.
Ah…?
I had no idea what had just happened to me.
When I came to my senses, I saw that he had collapsed with his hands on the floor, and through my dazed mind, I could only feel his shadow approaching.
The man standing in front of me now filled me with great fear.
Always grown up surrounded by overflowing love, had never experienced such strong malice.
“Lien.”
I was afraid to look at his face.
No, I didn’t even have the strength to raise my head before that. I wanted to run away. I wanted to scream for help.
But everything was paralyzed by fear.
“Lien. Can’t you hear me? I just called you.”
When I didn’t react in any way, I soon heard the sound of something breaking and crashing around me.
Inside, I could only curl up and tremble.
After his anger subsided, he belatedly apologized to me.
“Sorry. Are you surprised? I guess I was too excited.”
He rolled his eyes and smiled casually.
“Sometimes I can’t control my anger. Everyone has had that experience, so you understand, right?”
I didn’t answer anything.
I just stared ahead without focus, tears streaming down my face. He affectionately stroked my head as it lay on the floor.
“I don’t think you’re in the mood to talk to me today, so I’ll just leave.
Don’t worry, I will compensate you for the things I broke today.”
* * *
From that day on, the way Rex Begonia treated me completely changed. He openly threatened me.
The current connection between the Duke of Begonia and the Count of
Armeria was much more diverse than I thought.
The Count’s people were the only thing left to me after losing my parents. There was no way I could disobey him.
So, I decided to ask this question forever.
Fortunately or unfortunately, Rex Begonia never caused bloodshed.
This means that if I keep my mouth shut, it won’t be difficult to hide this fact from the Count’s people.
It was amazing that he was able to control himself like that even when his eyes were rolling in anger.
Rex Begonia visited me often after that.
For him to reveal his true colors to me, but then it was easy.
He transformed into a demon whenever he did something I didn’t like. How much time has passed?
Unable to bear the pain alone, I went to see Erhan. It was half impulsive. But that choice was a wrong decision.
Erhan’s face, who heard the whole story from me, was as cold and cold as frost in the middle of winter.
“So what’s your point in telling me that? You want revenge?” I was shocked and looked at Erhan blankly.
I never dreamed of revenge.
I just wanted you to listen to my situation and comfort me. Erhan gave my head an unpleasant shove with his index finger.
“Listen carefully. Rex is the heir to the Begonia duchy. He said he would become a duke in the future. It means that my value is different from yours.”
The value is different…?
Who? Me and my family, Rex Begonia?
“Do you know how much trouble I went through to make a kite with Rex? If you fed me, clothed me, and put me to sleep, I should think about returning the favor.”
He continued speaking as if he felt refreshed once he said it.
“Since my parents asked me if I was coming, did you really think I was their daughter? The subject was born to a commoner without parents. How dare you?”
My mind was filled with shock and betrayal.
I never dreamed that Erhan thought of me that way.
“Now that you think about it, you take after your father? Your father, who was born an orphan, also has no parents, right?”
When Erhan mentioned his deceased father, I came to my senses. My heart, which had been beating like crazy, cooled down.
“Get out. And don’t ever come to me for something like this again.”
It was the moment when the knot that tied him to his family was loosened. It was a mistake that could never be repaired.
* * *
After Erhan revealed his true feelings, he began to secretly harass me. Rather, it seems like it went well.
Breaking a bottle of medicine that I cherished was a common occurrence.
He repeated the childish thing of stealing my homework done the day before class every day.
I took advantage of the fact that among the herbs I was researching were poisonous, I pretended to be poisoned.
Of course, the Count and my aunt believed in me until the end. The only thing that got worse was my reputation among users. Such petty bullying was laughable compared to Rex Begonia.
All the more so because he was not the type of person who would devise tricks and cause trouble.
“I’m glad it was only one-dimensional harassment.” A thought suddenly occurred to me.
Did he start to dislike me when I entrusted myself to the count’s family, or before that?
A hollow laugh came out.
“Well, I guess that’s not important.”
In any case, it won’t change the fact that Erhan doesn’t think of me as family.
I found out later that he knew everything that happened between me and Rex Begonia.
Is that it?
He hung around Rex Begonia like he was showing off and talked about me.
I was playing into the hands of Erhan, whom I believed to be family. My life was like a bird in a cage.
I bought a recording pen by paying a trusted person.
As if responding to the conditions, when I held the recording pen, I would naturally break into a cold sweat and my body would tremble.
Because there was always Rex Begonia in front of me when recording started.
In fact, even if I recorded something, there was no way I would let the Count and Aunt listen to it.
Nevertheless, the reason I decided to record it was for the sake of an unexpected future.
And on the other hand, it was because I wanted to be comforted. Someday.
I hoped that one day I would have someone I could tell everything to.
I hoped there would be someone who could cry and complain that it was painful and that it was difficult.
I wanted to meet someone who could cover up my terrible memories. I didn’t want to burden my younger brother Luca.
My aunt was weak.
You might faint from shock if you found out this happened to me. The Count cared about his family more than anyone else.
If I listen to the recording, I will formally raise this issue with the Begonia Duke family.
I didn’t want that.
There was no way the Count family could gain anything from the conflict with the Duke of Begonia.
“I’m the only one who’s having a hard time.”
If only I kept my mouth shut. If only I sacrificed myself, the Count family could enjoy the peace it had maintained so far.
In fact, killing Rex Begonia was very easy.
There are dozens of poisons that can be made right now.
The reason I couldn’t do that was to protect what was left of me.
The only people I have left. Aunt, Count, Luca. My family
* * *
“I changed my mind.”
I quietly stared at Rex Begonia. He seemed unusually in good spirits. “Okay. You won “You’re so stubborn, Lien.”
He stroked my cheek gently. I felt uncomfortable as if a snake was crawling up my body.
“The reason you’re rejecting me like this is because I offered you the position of concubine rather than royal wife. Yes?”
Rex Begonia rolled his eyes mischievously. His low voice penetrates my eardrums.
“I will welcome you as a duchess. It’s not a lie. I will somehow get you to sit next to me. Are you relieved now? It was what you wanted.”
I never wanted the position of duchess. I desperately wanted him out of my life.
Again, those words gave me goosebumps.
Because it meant that he wanted me enough to take the risk and decide to have me sit next to him.
