Chapter 03
All the wedding preparations were suddenly postponed. Everything that had been progressing smoothly was put on hold.
“Meet him just one more time. Then decide. Why are you in such a rush?
Who knows, maybe things will work out if you talk?”
I silently stared at my father as he spoke.
‘Father, if just talking a few more times could have fixed things, then why did I have to wander in the darkness for so long?’
My heart ached.
‘Why do you think I am so desperate to run away now? From someone who was once my light.’
But those thoughts remained only in my mind.
In the end, I swallowed my words and agreed.
Besides, I had something I wanted to say to him, too. Something I could only say when I wasn’t begging when we were standing on equal ground.
And so, I sat in the tea room, but my hands were growing cold.
Only now, after escaping everything, did I finally realize how unhappy I had been.
When I looked back on the past, it was as if my memories had been cut away, leaving only black ashes.
Clink.
“…!”
Suddenly, I felt a burning sensation in my hand and quickly set down my teacup.
It seemed I had spilled hot tea on myself without realizing it.
At that moment, a man’s voice came from the entrance. It was strong and young.
“Are you alright? Do you need a handkerchief, Lady Carmilla?”
My husband—no, Bern.
I widened my eyes for a moment, then felt a sense of relief.
My heart… didn’t race. Instead, it sank heavily.
Ah. How afraid I had been. Afraid that seeing Bern again would make my heart beat faster. That I might foolishly fall in love with him again.
But my heart had already burned to ashes. It no longer beat for him.
I felt sure now—finally, the past was truly becoming the past. The darkness that had coiled in my mind was lifting.
At last, I didn’t have to love him anymore. I didn’t have to hate that woman anymore. My heart was finally free.
There is a big difference between hating someone and having no choice but to hate them.
My chest felt tight.
I closed my eyes briefly, as if to calm my emotions, then opened them and spoke firmly.
“I’m fine. I have a napkin. More importantly, I have something to say.”
Bern’s eyes immediately turned cold. I had seen that look countless times before.
“If you’re here to say you love me, I don’t want to hear it. I’ve told you before—I am not the kind of man who can make you happy.”
In an instant, everything came rushing back.
His eyes, his words, his growing cruelty. His coldness.
Even when I had confronted his lover, he had struck me.
Yes, I had begged for love.
But I wanted to ask him—does that make you innocent?
“I know why you refused to marry me.”
Bern’s fist clenched tightly. His knuckles turned white as he stepped forward and sat down on the sofa.
“What are you trying to say?”
I looked directly at Bern. He seemed slightly startled that I was meeting his gaze so firmly.
Had I never looked him in the eye before?
Ah… that’s right. I had been too nervous, too in love, too afraid to even properly look at his face.
A bitter memory. A memory that only brought pain now.
“Her name was Raina, wasn’t it? Why didn’t you just tell me the truth? Instead of vague words like ‘I don’t love you’ or ‘I can’t make you happy,’ wouldn’t it have been more respectful to be honest?”
“How do you know that name…?”
Bern shifted in his seat, frowning deeply. His glare was sharp, but I had faced worse before.
I was never afraid of him when he was angry.
I was more afraid when he was kind. When he gently offered me a handkerchief, pretending nothing was wrong.
So, with all the resentment that had burned inside me for so long, I spoke.
“You wanted to protect your lover, didn’t you? That’s why you couldn’t give me a clear answer.
You couldn’t say outright, ‘I already love someone else,’ so instead, you said you couldn’t love me. But if that was the case, what was my crime? What did I do to deserve this?”
Bern’s lips twisted.
“You were the one who pushed for this marriage in the first place. You’re the one acting out of jealousy.”
I shook my head.
“No. I begged my father to break off the engagement. My mother, too. Our wedding plans have completely stopped.”
His eyes widened in shock. He stared at me as if trying to figure something out.
I spoke calmly.
“I don’t need a husband who doesn’t love me. I once thought you would be a kind and responsible husband.
A good father. But I now understand that you can never be those things.”
Bern was silent for a moment before speaking.
“That’s because you wanted something that was never yours to begin with.”
I smiled softly and answered.
“No. It’s because you are a coward. You don’t dare to stand up to your family and take responsibility for your love. So in the end, all you can do is hide her.
Keep her as a secret mistress. And blame your wife for everything.”
That was exactly what he had done.
The man I had once loved, the man I had staked my future on, had been too cowardly to fight against his family and society. Instead, he had hidden his lover away and made me the villain.
I had hated Raina, but I hated Bern just as much.
He had refused to sacrifice anything—neither his family’s approval nor his social standing—so instead, he had turned his lover into a secret affair and made his wife miserable.
“You will never be a good husband to her. Nor a good father to her child. Because you are a coward.
You don’t have the strength to fight for your love, and you don’t have the responsibility to love the wife your family chose for you. In the end, you will only make both women suffer.”
Bern’s face turned deathly pale.
I smiled.
“Am I wrong?”
The sky was a bright blue, and the sun was hot for a spring day.
In the middle of the training grounds, a cheerful voice laughed.
“So, you just sat there and took it? Bern, your fiancée is no ordinary woman.”
Clang!
The sharp sound of swords clashing rang out.
Scrape—
The blades scraped against each other, sending sparks flying. The unpleasant noise echoed in the air.
Across from Bern, a young man grinned playfully. His sharp red eyes sparkled mischievously.
“Is that why you’re distracted?”
The young man’s sword twisted strangely, pressing against Bern’s guard unusually.
“Is that why your sword is so weak today?”
Bern frowned.
That bastard, Jed. Always using strange tricks.
“Step back.”
He adjusted his grip and twisted his wrist, breaking free from the entanglement.
Their swords swung dangerously, slicing through the air before parting.
But then, using the momentum, Jed swung his pommel and struck Bern right in the forehead.
Critical hit!
Bern’s head snapped back, and he fell to the ground.
A cold voice called out.
“That’s enough. Jed wins.”
A tall man with a sharp gaze stepped forward.
Jed grinned, sheathing his sword.
“You heard him, right? His Highness says I won.”
The prince, Max, spoke dryly.
“Bern, you were distracted.”
Bern groaned, pressing his bleeding forehead.
Jed laughed, his eyes gleaming with mischief.
“You’ve been so out of it lately, I had to wonder what kind of woman managed to shake you up this badly.”
The three young men’s laughter echoed through the training grounds, rising into the bright sky.
