“Episode 7”
“Why are you doing this?”
“You’ve been longing for your dead ex-lover for a long time.”
“Diana.”
“I… long for my dead child. My child, whom I couldn’t properly hold or even name. So let’s stop now. I’ll stop loving you.”
“Something feels off today. Let’s talk about it next time.”
Staring blankly at Diana, Rixio left after saying those words. After a week of his daily visits, he returned to her again.
But Diana remained the same.
“Let’s get a divorce. Us.”
For a whole month, Rixio had nothing more to offer to her, who desired a divorce. She didn’t appreciate anything he gave her, whether it was flowers, jewelry, or clothes.
“I have no intention of divorcing you.”
“…I’ll wait. Until you agree to divorce.”
Originally, he intended not to divorce until he fully absorbed into the ducal family, but there was no way around it. She seemed to have lost all emotions. So Rixio eventually consented to divorce her.
The two of them went out together after a long time. It was for their divorce, but even so, Diana smiled faintly at the long-awaited outing.
“You changed everything without leaving out a single thing you gave me.”
“…Did it have to be this way? If the problem between us was because we didn’t have a child, if that’s why we’re doing this, then the child…”
“No. It’s not just that. I’m just too tired. Rixio. We can never be good together.”
Eventually, the two of them divorced according to her wishes. After signing the documents and riding the carriage again, they returned to the ducal palace for one last dinner together. There were no words on the way back.
And that’s when it happened.
The road to the ducal palace was located in the mountains, so there were steep paths. Despite several repairs, whenever it rained, mudslides occurred. It was cleared due to the outing of the ducal couple, but the problem was that on that day, sudden rain poured down.
The sky, which had been shining as if playing a joke, darkened, and heavy rain poured down in an instant. The mud eventually engulfed their carriage. Although the carriage did not break due to its durability and size, the startled horses lost control in a moment, causing the carriage they were riding to tumble down the cliff.
Thud, clunk!
With a tremendous noise, the carriage shook mercilessly.
“Diana! Diana! Snap out of it!”
“……”
“Diana!”
Startled, Rixio tried to approach her and hold Diana, but within the swaying carriage, he couldn’t reach her. Diana’s consciousness was fading. Amidst it all, Diana sensed death.
“My baby….”
The child must have felt lonely. The child must have missed her.
Diana smiled gently.
“Mama will come.”
As the carriage tumbled down the cliff and hit the ground, Diana’s body was thrown out. She raised her hand, sensing the loss of sensation. Her pale hand was stained with crimson blood.
“I’m dying.”
Her heavy eyelids trembled for a moment before finally closing. It wasn’t difficult for her to recognize that death was near.
But death didn’t claim her as easily as she thought.
“I’m sure she’s dead.”
As if denying the unbelievable reality, Diana brushed her hand over her head. Soft hair with a texture like silk. A chubby white hand caressing that hair.
I’m dead, but what is this sight?
If time had passed more quickly, perhaps something would have changed, but time guided Diana back to the day that woman had come.
“Little miss, what color should we choose for the curtains in the baby’s room?”
Diana was startled by the familiar words she had heard before.
“Huh?”
“The color of the curtains.”
‘I know what I’ll say later.’
“I think a fresh yellow would be nice. Light green is also good.”
“Is that so! Understood, we’ll do as the little miss says.”
“Wash the baby’s clothes and hang them out to dry when the weather is nice. Since the weather is good today, it should be fine today too.”
As soon as she said that, rain began to fall softly.
It was that day.
No, it couldn’t be, but it was undoubtedly that day.
Because of her ignorance, the day she lost her child.
In disbelief, Diana acted just like she did on that day. Arguing with Hysteria, going to see the carriage suddenly. And once again, the amniotic fluid burst, and she held the baby in her arms.
Everything was exactly the same as in the past. Could it be that what she dreamed was a premonition?
Diana, finally disillusioned by the unbelievable reality, demanded divorce from him just like in the past. And on the day they returned from the divorce, once again, they faced another accident. She died, and time turned back once more.
The next time, she wanted to live.
Choosing a different option to avoid losing the child, but the woman’s arrival, losing the child, repeated the same torment. The child eventually died. There was no way to save the child.
Death engulfed her again. Even without the carriage accident, if she returned from the divorce, she died. Five deaths. In each of them, Diana tried to save the child and had to lose the child.
“Oh God, what do you want from me… to give me such pain?”
If it meant becoming a companion to the lonely child in the afterlife, she could endure it. But time repeated, and she died but couldn’t die. After a painful wail, finally someone’s voice reached her.
“My beloved child. My child.”
For the first time, the pleading voice of God reached her.
But Diana wasn’t as happy.
“Why can’t I… die? As the mother of a child who left this world so sadly, can’t I be with her at the end? My God, Briana. Have I done something so wrong?”
Was it so difficult to be able to accompany the lonely child at the end?
“My beloved child. My child who has given life and walked every path of life.”
“…Why do you make me unable to die, even though I love her so much? Is it such a big request to die as the mother of my child?”
“You still have things to do. Live.”
“I will die. Please let me die. There’s no meaning left in living.”
A warm hand touched Diana’s face.
“Someone distorted time and ruined everyone’s fate. He approached you and messed up your destiny. You have already met him. You must find and eliminate him. Only then can you find your destiny.”
“My destiny? I don’t need that. Please…!”
“Because of him, the child died. If he exists, the child will never come back to you.”
“Ah…?”
“If you find him and restore the distorted fate, your child will come back to you.”
“My child…?”
“The child will be born.”
In a different form, in a different life.
“Finish everything before that time. If you don’t, you’ll be consumed again.”
With those words, the voice of God faded away. Waking up from the dream, Diana clearly remembered the meaning of a year.
“I will live. This time, I will never miss it. My child.”
And once again, Diana, awakened from death, repeated the same events as in the past. But she didn’t hold the child in her arms until it became a corpse this time.
She accepted death. For the first time. With a heart so painful that she had ever been willing to die, she sent the child away without shedding tears. Watching the child burn away, Diana, holding only a handful of her palm, looked for Rixio.
Her husband who hadn’t come even at the moment when the child left.
“Rixio.”
“…Did I send the child off well?”
“You still don’t seem to care about our child.”
“…If I step in, you won’t let go of the child again.”
Watching him silently, Diana projected a different Rixio than usual.
“Fine….”
“Yeah. Let’s stop here for today.”
“Okay.”
Seeing Diana behaving strangely compliant, he was at a loss for words.
“Instead, let’s get a divorce.”
“What?”
“A year from now. Today.”
“What are you talking about right now! Divorce. Diana. That’s…”
As before, he hadn’t changed at all. He still reacted sensitively to the word ‘divorce’.
“A year should be enough. The reason you didn’t let me go… is because you want to fully assimilate into this aristocratic family. To uphold the name of the Duke completely from your brother, from your sister-in-law.”
Watching her speak so dryly, Rixio just clenched his lips.
“Why are you changing so much?”
“Maybe I’ve always been like this… unchanging.”
“I don’t understand any of this situation. Even your constant use of honorifics towards me.”
“It tells you how distant our relationship has become.”
There was no room for negotiation. She kept her distance from him like an impenetrable barrier. Rixio couldn’t help but notice it.
“Isn’t a year enough?”
“Diana.”
Her eyes looked sadder than ever.
“I can’t do that.”
Rixio was about to say it’s impossible, but he couldn’t bring himself to say anything else. Because he was the sinner. If Hedea hadn’t come there, or if he hadn’t rushed out upon hearing the news of her arrival, the child wouldn’t have died.
That was it.
He couldn’t go to Diana just because he had to protect Hedea.
“…A year.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t ask for alimony, and I won’t cling to you when the time comes.”
Watching her speak so coldly, he nodded heavily.
“If it’s a year….”
If it’s a year, he’ll change his mind. With such an easy heart, Rixio agreed to the divorce.