“Episode 29”
‘The voice of the deity is always one-sided.’
‘Everything is for you.’
Would a father do anything harmful to his child? Everything is for you. Remembering how her father used to say that, Diana bit her lip. She then calmed herself, deciding not to dwell on such thoughts. Now was not the time to waste on such personal emotions.
‘…Yes, I suppose you are doing this for me.’
She wanted to mention that she had found someone defying fate or a potential ally, but something instinctively stopped her. It was as if her intuition told her that now was not the time to bring it up. So, Diana, who had intended to ask about this directly, changed the subject.
‘But my deity, I suddenly became curious. When I find that person, what should I do? How can I avoid death and meet my child?’
In response to Diana’s calm question, devoid of emotional high points, the deity finally answered.
With words she could not bear.
‘Kill them.’
For a moment, Diana’s face hardened. To kill someone else to save herself—what kind of answer was that?
‘Right now… that….’
But the deity was resolute.
‘When you find them, kill them. That is the only way for you to reclaim your life.’
She was speechless, unable to argue against those words. It was as if someone else was pretending to be the deity, so firm was Brienna’s voice.
‘Kill… How can that be possible?’
‘Humans die eventually anyway. So, do not think otherwise and kill them.’
It felt unfamiliar, as if it was someone else. The Brienna of the myths, whom Diana loved and admired, loved humans. She had become a deity to save humans. And now she was saying to kill? That all humans die?
‘Are you really the deity Brienna?’
‘Of course. It is my temple, which is why I can speak to you.’
I don’t want to believe it. Her long-held faith wavered. With her eyes tightly shut and hands clasped in prayer for the deity, the strength slowly drained from her grip.
‘Do not entertain other thoughts. That is the only way for both you and me to survive. I do not want to lose my beloved child.’
‘…….’
‘If you don’t kill, you will die. You will never see the child you long for again.’
‘…….’
‘So, do not think about anything else and do as I say.’
When those final words reached her, Diana felt as if her heart was being torn apart. It’s real. She really means to find and kill that person. Is such a thing even possible? She let out a bitter laugh in disbelief.
‘…I can’t possibly kill someone….’
‘You have already met both the helper and the one defying fate. So, seek help from the helper.’
‘Ah….’
‘Even if the person approaching you feels burdensome, you must not feel burdened. That person is meant to help you. Do exactly as they say. Always, I watch over… tsutsu….’
Once again, the voice of the deity was cut off as if unable to convey more than a certain amount of information, and then it completely disappeared. For a moment, Diana felt a chill run through her entire body.
“So, this is it…”
“Is that all? It’s been a long time since we’ve been able to offer proper food to the deity as well. And it’s all thanks to you, Lady Diana.”
Are they asking for more money? Even though I was going to give it, being pressured in this way didn’t sit well with me.
“That is….”
“But you don’t need to give us any more.”
Diana was momentarily at a loss for words. She had naturally assumed they were asking for more money, but instead, the head priest shook his head.
“Not needing to give means….”
“We’ll try to stand on our own. Since you made the offering, the morale of the priests has greatly improved.”
Indeed, as Diana glanced around the temple, she noticed the priests nodding in agreement with the head priest’s words.
“It’s an easy path.”
“A path made with the help of others will eventually collapse easily. Instead of relying on help every time it seems to crumble, we’ll achieve it with our own strength.”
“Oh.”
Letting out a small sigh, Diana nodded in agreement.
“If that’s your wish, I understand.”
“Thank you. We are very grateful for your understanding.”
Seeing the head priest smiling more brightly than ever, Diana nodded.
“But please let me know if you ever need help. For the deity I believe in… I want to support those who work so hard for that deity.”
“Yes!”
In that moment, Diana felt emotions she had never experienced before. If even these people strive so hard to live on their own, why had she always sought the easy path? Believing and following the will of the deity—what would come after that? Would her life be anything more than living according to the deity’s will forever?
Diana looked at the smiles of those standing before her—genuine smiles. Despite the hardships and exhaustion, these people did not give up. From their determination, Diana made a decision.
She would not blindly follow the enigmatic will of the deity. Even if she ultimately had to comply with the deity’s will, she decided she would make her own efforts as well.
With that thought, she felt as if something that had been constricting her entire body had snapped. It felt like the strings that had bound her like a marionette, moving according to someone else’s will, were loosening.
“And aside from that, I wanted to express my gratitude. Because of you, Lady Diana, we were able to resolve to this extent. Without you, we would probably have given up on this temple and become priests of another deity.”
Diana wanted to thank them instead. The day, starting with Bethany, had brought her many realizations.
“Thank you so much, Lady Diana.”
However, not wanting to burden them, she kept her gratitude to herself and simply nodded.
“Come to think of it, you always call me by my name here.”
