If I was Going to Regret It Anyway

“…..So you’ve been searching for the ring buried in the sand?”

 

“Yes. When the ring box fell, it flew farther than expected. We both knelt down and searched for about ten minutes. Daryl suggested buying a new one and proposing again, but we couldn’t just do that.”

 

Marianne laughed heartily like a young girl at Eleanor’s words.

 

“With such an enormous diamond, it’s worth the effort. Someone who’ll find it later could have made a fortune, but it will only be their loss.”

 

Marianne looked at Eleanor and winked.

 

“Congratulations, Eleanor.”

 

“…Thank you, Marianne.”

 

Eleanor smiled faintly.

 

Today was Daryl and Eleanor’s second wedding.

 

Daryl had said there was no need to force a ceremony if Eleanor didn’t want one. It was also fine to have a modest one with just close acquaintances.

 

[It’s okay. From the Duke’s perspective, it’s a significant event. It’s better to do it openly and properly rather than keeping it quiet.]

 

[Why worry about such things? The Duke’s position doesn’t matter. What’s most important is your comfort.] 

 

Daryl replied with a look of distress.

 

[I’m really fine, so don’t worry. Besides, it’s a rare chance to think about it again. I also want to have a happy wedding.]

 

Daryl’s face twisted with guilt and regret. Eleanor gently smiled and took his hand.

 

[Don’t make such a face. I’m truly fine. Didn’t you promise? To make me the happiest person in the world. Was that a lie?]

 

[…..Of course not.]

 

[Then that settles it. Let’s have the wedding. It’s okay if not everyone blesses us. Surely, there will be people who are genuinely happy for us, and their blessings will be enough.]

 

Just as Eleanor had said, many people were genuinely happy for her. Marianne, the painter Miles, the Townsend family’s servants including Peggy and Emily, and the duke’s servants including Herbert, all shared in the joy.

 

“Eleanor.”

 

Upon seeing the face of the person who had just entered the bridal waiting room, Eleanor’s expression brightened.

 

“Baroness Hamilton!”

 

It was Agnes Hamilton, Baroness Hamilton, Eleanor’s first chaperone. She smiled warmly, her eyes crinkling with affection.

 

“Congratulations, Eleanor. You look truly beautiful today.”

 

“Thank you. And thank you for coming. How have you been feeling lately?”

 

“Well, you can see for yourself.”

 

“That’s a relief.”

 

Agnes suddenly looked towards the door. Eleanor tilted her head in confusion, wondering what was happening, when an unexpected figure hesitantly stepped inside.

 

It was Nancy Radner. Eleanor’s face stiffened slightly at the sight of her.

 

Nancy was a friend who had learned the ways of society under Agnes. She had also come to Daryl and Eleanor’s first wedding five years ago.

 

[Now that you’re a duchess, you should be selective about your friends. It’s natural that we can’t be as we were before since our circumstances have changed. If you associate with me, you won’t hear anything good…]

 

Nancy stood next to Agnes, her gaze lowered.

 

“Nancy.”

 

Agnes called her name in a scolding tone. Nancy lifted her head as if she had made up her mind.

 

“Congratulations on your wedding, Eleanor. Before…I’m sorry.”

 

A quiet smile spread across Eleanor’s face.

 

“No, what is there to be sorry about? I’m actually thankful. For coming…twice like this.”

 

“……”

 

Nancy hesitated, unable to respond immediately.

 

“How have you been? I’m really curious. Let’s catch up on our stories later. Along with Baroness Hamilton…”

 

“Are you sure you’ll be okay? It might be quite tiring to keep up with an old lady’s chatter.”

 

Agnes’s mischievous words made Eleanor burst into laughter, and a faint smile appeared on Nancy’s lips.

 

“….Yes, Eleanor. Let’s definitely do that.”

 

At that moment, Layla entered.

 

She had volunteered to take Marianne’s place as Eleanor’s assistant from the previous wedding.

 

Layla was wide-eyed and her chest was heaving, as if she had run there in a hurry, clutching the hem of her dress.

 

“Why are you like this, Layla? Did you run here? You shouldn’t. You need to be careful with your body…”

 

Eleanor had heard that Layla was pregnant while preparing for the wedding. While Eleanor was overjoyed at the double blessing, Layla herself looked down shyly.

 

[I still don’t know whether it’s a boy or not.]

 

[That doesn’t matter. Whether it’s a boy or a girl, both are great blessings.]

 

[He says he’d like it if she looked like me. Even with my mother-in-law giving hints right beside us, he doesn’t care… Anyway, no matter how old he gets, he never seems to mature. It’s a big problem.]

 

Despite her words, Layla’s expression was filled with deep affection for her husband. Seeing Layla like that, Eleanor couldn’t help but smile.

 

[Even if it’s a son, becoming the Duke of Griffith is now out of reach. If it’s a daughter, we can take comfort in that.]

 

Now it was Eleanor’s turn to wear an awkward expression. Layla and Eleanor looked at each other and chuckled.

 

“It’s okay now, I’m in a stable period. More importantly, Her Majesty the Empress Dowager has arrived.”

 

At those words, Eleanor rose to her feet without realizing it.

 

Soon, Empress Dowager Theodora entered the bridal waiting room, accompanied by her maids. Everyone in the waiting room bowed their heads in unison.

 

“Your Majesty.”

 

“Everyone, raise your heads.”

 

Theodora looked much thinner than the last time Eleanor had seen her. Perhaps because of that, there was an atmosphere of dignity and detachment surrounding her.

 

“Congratulations on your wedding, Eleanor.”

 

“Your visit is as gracious as a summer rain,” Eleanor said.

 

Empress Dowager Theodora quietly looked around.

 

“May we have a moment alone?” she asked.

 

At the Empress Dowager’s request, everyone except Eleanor quickly left the waiting room. Soon, only Eleanor and the Empress Dowager remained.

 

“I didn’t come today solely to celebrate your wedding. I owe you an apology, and I’ve come to repay that debt,” Theodora said, slowly lifting her gaze.

 

“I’m sorry, Eleanor.”

 

“Your Majesty, what do you mean…Why would Your Majesty apologize to me?”

 

“…I know what the late Emperor did to you.”

 

At those words, Eleanor’s expression hardened slightly.

 

“I knew long before that he had his eye on you, and yet I failed to protect you. It’s all my oversight. I’m sorry.”

 

“…..”

 

Not knowing how much Theodora knew, Eleanor found it difficult to say anything rashly.

 

Eleanor cautiously began to speak.

 

“…I don’t think Your Majesty has anything to apologize for.”

 

“Eleanor.”

 

“The late Emperor’s wrongdoing is solely his own. Your Majesty need not feel responsible.”

 

“…….”

 

Theodora’s eyes wavered slightly.

 

“Is that… the reason you chose this marriage?”

 

“…….”

 

The meaning behind the question was clear. Frederick’s wrongdoing was his own, and not the responsibility of his son, Daryl. That was what Eleanor believed.

 

“…Yes, that’s right.”

 

Eleanor said in a soft voice.

 

“I see.”

 

Theodora closed her eyes and fell silent for a moment.

 

She had deeply trusted Frederick. Even when everyone doubted his integrity, Theodora never abandoned the belief that Frederick was not such a person, and she seemed greatly relieved after confirming the facts with Eleanor.

 

But in the end, a more terrible truth was revealed to the world.

 

What must Theodora have felt at that moment?

 

It was impossible for Eleanor to fully comprehend her feelings.

 

“Once again, congratulations, Eleanor. Forget the past and…I hope you find happiness. That is my sincere wish.”

 

“…Your Majesty’s grace is immeasurable.”

 

Eleanor said, placing her hand on her chest and bowing her head.

 

****

 

Eleanor entered the wedding hall with a bouquet in hand.

 

Unlike her first wedding, there was no one to accompany her this time.

 

The wedding, like the last time, was held at the duke’s residence, but the ceremony hall and the reception building were all newly constructed. It was Daryl’s decision, not wanting Eleanor to recall the unpleasant memories of her past wedding.

 

Daryl was waiting for Eleanor, standing in front of the altar.

 

Comment

  1. Pitidri says:

    Eu estou mais ansiosa que a Eleonor pela lua de mel…. 🤭

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