If I was Going to Regret It Anyway

Eleanor had never desired wealth or honor in her life. Her intention to sell her paintings was solely for the purpose of self-reliance. Now, the excessive rise in the prices of her works was rather burdensome.

 

Of course, setting aside Eleanor’s own reputation, it would certainly be meaningful if she could restore the reputation of her mother and her family. But Eleanor couldn’t be as optimistic as Aaron.

 

It didn’t seem like people’s view of her would change in an instant just because Eleanor became a famous painter. On the contrary, it could only have the effect of reminding people of the scandal that was gradually being forgotten. Seeing Eleanor’s expression, Benjamin quickly noticed her feelings.

 

“Your Highness, the Crown Prince. I understand what you’re saying, but in fact, Miss Townsend is suffering from a difficult chronic illness. It’s a disease that worsens rapidly when she goes to crowded places. That’s why she hardly went out even when she was living in the Duke of Griffith’s residence.”

 

“Ah, I see. I remember. She even collapsed at a party once. She’s been recuperating all along, but she hasn’t recovered yet?”

 

Aaron turned to Eleanor and asked. Eleanor slightly bowed her head.

 

“I’m sorry to say this, but it’s hard to give a definite answer. I haven’t been in front of many people since then…”

 

Aaron stroked his chin and made a sound of contemplation.

 

“So, you mean you won’t know unless you try. Then I think it’s worth testing.”

 

“…Your Highness.”

 

Despite Benjamin’s awkward voice, Aaron did not back down.

 

“If her condition worsens, I’ll make sure she can immediately avoid the situation and rest. I’ll have the royal carriage on standby right next to the palace. Then there won’t be a problem, right?”

 

“…….”

 

Benjamin seemed hesitant to answer. It was clear that he was doing his best to protect Eleanor’s intentions.

 

But Aaron was none other than the Crown Prince of this country. If he was someone Benjamin could persuade with his opinion, he wouldn’t have come this far in the first place.

 

“I understand. If Your Highness wishes so, I will follow.”

 

Upon hearing Eleanor’s words, Benjamin looked back at her in surprise.

 

“Oh, you will do so? You’ve made a good decision. You certainly won’t regret it. After all, this isn’t something I’m pushing for my personal desire. The name of Marcus Miller will surely rise even higher, and the business of the Viscount of Brooke will surely prosper.”

 

Aaron spoke with a flushed face.

 

“On such a happy day, we can’t not celebrate. Look. Prepare the food and drinks.”

 

The servants who received the order quickly vacated their seats.

 

“…..”

 

Benjamin looked at Eleanor with a worried look. She nodded quietly as if to say she was okay.

 

As she had told Benjamin a few days ago, all of this was ultimately Eleanor’s responsibility. She couldn’t burden Benjamin with her selfish desires.

 

Since divorcing Daryl and returning to Loud, there had been no symptoms. But that was because there was no situation that could cause a seizure in the first place.

 

The first symptom occurred when she received many stares at the wedding reception. If it was an exhibition hosted by the Crown Prince, she would receive more attention than that. It was the moment when the identity of Marcus Miller, who had always been veiled, was revealed. Moreover, if it was known that she was the protagonist of the rumor that had stirred the capital for the past twenty years, it was certain that a considerable uproar would occur.

 

‘…In the end, that day will be the biggest hurdle. Somehow, if I can safely overcome that, I’ll be fine afterwards.’

 

The problem was how to overcome it. She still had the sedative that Hardy had prescribed when she was at the Duke’s residence, but she thought that the effect of the medicine would have fallen a lot due to the long time.

 

‘I need to show it to another doctor and ask for a similar medicine.’

 

In the end, it was a problem of Eleanor’s mind. She had no choice but to harden her will as much as possible and overcome it calmly.

 

She could do it. Because she had always been like that. Because she had to be.

 

****

 

A few days later, Benjamin contacted her that the exhibition schedule was set for two weeks later.

 

It was about two years since she last appeared in front of so many people at the last royal party she attended. There was a lot to prepare. She didn’t even have a clear idea of what dress to wear or how much makeup to put on.

 

Among the people Eleanor knew, the top expert in this field was Marianne. Eleanor sent a letter to Marianne saying that she had such and such a thing and would like her to help her as before.

 

After going to the exhibition, everyone would know that Marcus Miller was Eleanor. Then she thought it would be right to tell her in advance. Thankfully, Marianne sent an answer that she would visit the next day.

 

On the day Marianne was supposed to come, Eleanor went for a walk early in the morning riding Molstead. It was a routine she had been doing consistently for the past few months. Eleanor walked on the forest path that was open between tall trees. The fresh air, filled with dew, refreshed her chest.

 

Suddenly, she saw a man riding a black horse coming from the opposite side. At first glance, he was not a familiar person. As the distance got closer, Eleanor instinctively tried to greet him. Then she couldn’t help but open her eyes wide.

 

It was Daryl.

 

At first, she thought she had seen it wrong. But she quickly realized it wasn’t. There was no other man who looked like that.

 

Daryl stopped his horse right in front of Eleanor by pulling the reins.

 

He looked more emaciated and haggard than Eleanor remembered. His sunken eyes and prominent cheekbones made Daryl look even more angular and sharp. But one thing, only his pupils were different. The gaze looking at Eleanor without a word was calm yet heavy. She had never seen such a look from him in the year they lived together.

 

“Eleanor.”

 

At Daryl’s voice, Eleanor came to her senses.

 

“…Your Grace.”

 

Eleanor shook her head and blinked several times.

 

“How did you get here? Without a single attendant…Surely, you didn’t come for me?”

 

Daryl gave no answer. Eleanor hardened her expression.

 

“I’m sure I told you I didn’t want to see you again.”

 

“……”

 

“I’ll pretend I didn’t see you here today. Then, I’ll go first.”

 

After speaking quickly, Eleanor urged Molstead. And just as she was about to pass by Dariel,

 

“Are you really going?”

 

When Eleanor turned around, Daryl spoke a beat later.

 

“The exhibition of His Highness, the Crown Prince.”

 

Eleanor lost her words for a moment. Of course, Daryl would have known that Crown Prince Aaron was holding an exhibition of Marcus Miller. But how did he know that Eleanor was going to that exhibition? That day, Aaron had promised to keep the fact that Eleanor was the identity of Miller a secret until the day of the exhibition.

 

“I saw the painting you left behind.”

 

Dariel spoke softly.

 

“It was a bit different from the overall works of Marcus Miller… but not enough to not recognize it.”

 

“……”

 

There was only one painting that Eleanor had painted at the Duke’s residence. It was a portrait of Daryl. Why did that catch Daryl’s eye? She had certainly asked Herbert to dispose of it.

 

Eleanor bit her lip slightly. Should she have burned it herself after all? At the time, she didn’t even want to look at that painting, so she had to ask others to dispose of it.

 

“Once I realized it, there were several clues. Benjamin Gallahad had an exclusive contract with Marcus Miller. The timing of your deal with Gallahad overlapped with Miller’s debut. You consciously avoided mentioning Miller’s paintings. And…Margaret Miller.”

 

A few wrinkles were etched on Eleanor’s forehead. Hearing Peggy’s name from Daryl’s voice was indescribably strange.

 

“That’s the name of your favorite maid, isn’t it? Marcus Miller is clearly a name made after that maid.”

 

“……”

 

If he was so sure, there was no reason to deny it. Besides, everyone in the capital would know about it soon anyway. Eleanor stared at Daryl calmly.

 

“So what? Did you come to make some demands of me based on that fact?”

 

“……”

 

At Eleanor’s cold words, Daryl’s expression faintly twisted.

 

“If that’s the case, you’re mistaken. Everyone will know about it anyway when the exhibition opens.”

 

Daryl spoke again with a painful expression.

 

“That’s not it. I’m worried about your health…”

 

“Why my health?”

 

“You’re sick, aren’t you? That’s why you couldn’t go anywhere and stayed at home.”

 

“That’s not it.”

 

“…Not?”

 

“Yes. The reason I stayed at home was because you rejected all the invitations that came in my name.” (TL: this was during their 1 yr marriage)

 

“……”

 

Dariel’s face turned even paler than before.