If I was Going to Regret It Anyway

Herbert Stevens was polishing the silverware that afternoon. It was one of the most important tasks as the butler of Chatsworth House, and something he took great pride in.

 

Herbert firmly believed that the condition of the silverware was the most telling indicator of the standards of the mansion. Therefore, instead of delegating and supervising others, he, as the butler, took it upon himself to personally polish the silverware.

 

An hour ago, Herbert had seen Anthony, the second son of the late Duke, leave the mansion through the window. Anthony’s visits to the Duke’s mansion had increased since Daryl’s wedding, not for any other purpose, but to meet Duchess Eleanor.

 

Herbert had served the Duke of Griffith for three generations, starting from the great-grandfather. Frederick Lloyd, who passed away recently, was a very admirable figure as a nobleman and a gentleman, but like most people, he was not perfect. One of his two major failures was his children’s education.

 

Anthony Lloyd was the person many referred to as the biggest mistake of the Duke’s family. A seemingly spoiled brat, he was excluded from the inheritance due to his disappointment to his father, Frederick.

 

It was clear that Anthony was up to no good. He had become increasingly twisted since puberty, showing a particularly rebellious attitude towards his father, Frederick, and his brother, Daryl.

 

Daryl had been extremely busy since taking over Frederick’s business. It couldn’t be good that Anthony was visiting his sister-in-law while Daryl was away.

 

So, Herbert had a maid constantly monitor the two. It was important to figure out Anthony’s intentions, but preventing any unpleasant incidents was the top priority.

 

Fortunately, there have been no issues so far. But depending on the situation, he was ready to report to Daryl at any time.

 

After thoroughly checking the polished silverware, Herbert put it back in the cabinet. When he came out to the first floor corridor, he saw an unexpected figure.

 

“Madam.”

 

“Mr. Stevens.”

 

Eleanor greeted Herbert with a faint smile. Her blonde hair sparkled faintly in the afternoon sun coming in from a distant window. Herbert did not judge people by their appearance, but that didn’t mean he didn’t appreciate beauty. It has always been a source of pride for the servants when the mistress of the house was a beauty.

 

“You can call me Herbert comfortably.”

 

“I intend to, but it’s hard to say when I try.”

 

“Then Stevens is fine too. Please do as you feel comfortable, Madam.”

 

“Yes, thank you.”

 

Eleanor smiled shyly, somewhat awkwardly. At such times, she looked innocent and lovely, like a girl who had just stepped into society.

 

After receiving a report from the maid about what happened today, Herbert smiled unknowingly. He was impressed by the wise handling of the Duchess.

 

In fact, Herbert also had a negative prejudice about her before he met Eleanor in person. It was an opinion shared by most of the people in the Duke’s house, not just Herbert alone. But based on what he observed over the past two months, Eleanor was a flawless lady.

 

Eleanor dealt with numerous unreasonable treatments calmly, and she maintained her dignity while enduring and accepting those hardships.

 

‘I can somewhat understand why the late Duke left such a will.’

 

Of course, Herbert was a person of the Duke’s house. Even if he had a personal liking and sympathy for Eleanor, it did not change who he served. Therefore, even though he knew that the servants, led by the head maid Matilda, were all alienating and tormenting Eleanor, Herbert did not intervene. It was because he knew it was the directive of Princess Layla.

 

Of course, it seemed that Layla’s eyes looking at Eleanor had changed a bit recently. The biggest proof was that she allowed Eleanor to move from a room on the outskirts of the mansion to the Hibiscus Room used by the late Duchess.

 

There was a terribly twisted and rotten karma between the Duke’s family and the Townsend family for a long time. But that was only a matter of the previous generation, and it had nothing to do with the current generation.

 

‘It would be nice if the tangled thread could be untangled someday.’

 

Herbert asked cautiously.

 

“Do you need anything?”

 

“No, not really…”

 

Eleanor trailed off and hesitated. Herbert waited patiently.

 

“I heard today that there is a library in the Duke’s house…is that true?”

 

After hesitating for quite a while, she finally asked.

 

“Yes, that’s right. It was built by His Lordship’s great-grandfather. He loved books.”

 

“I see.” Eleanor muttered under her breath. Herbert cleared his throat and continued.

 

“Would you like to take a look?”

 

“…Would that be okay?”

 

“The library is also included in the Duke’s house. I don’t think the master would mind.”

 

“Well, then…”

 

“I’ll guide you. Please follow me.”

 

Herbert bowed his head and led the way.

 

****

 

The library was located on the west side of the northern garden. Despite being quite isolated from the rest of the Duke’s estate, it didn’t feel old or neglected. It seemed to be consistently maintained.

 

Herbert opened the door to the library for her. As the door opened, a faint smell of old paper and books wafted out. It was one of Eleanor’s favorite smells, along with the smell of paint. From that moment, her heart swelled with excitement.

 

Eleanor had loved reading books since she was young, and she couldn’t imagine a life without books. This was even more so because she was not allowed to go outside.

 

The inside was quite dark, probably to prevent the books from being damaged by sunlight. The temperature and humidity inside also seemed to be managed under strict calculations. Herbert lit a candle that was hanging at the entrance.

 

Eleanor let out a small exclamation without realizing it. The Townsend family also had a fairly large library compared to the size of the mansion, but it was incomparable to this library in terms of overall size and volume of books.

 

Eleanor looked around at the bookshelves surrounding her, her neck hurting from looking up. This was the first time she felt this excited since she came to the Duke’s house. Herbert watched her spinning around with sparkling eyes, seemingly pleased.

 

“Please take out any book and read it.”

 

“Is that okay?”

 

“Yes, of course.”

 

Eleanor carefully scanned the spines of the books as she walked along the nearby bookshelf. In fact, there was no need to worry so much, but she hesitated to pick up any book, thinking that it was the first book she was going to take out.

 

The books were well organized by type, author, and title. There were books of various genres, not biased towards one type, including novels, poetry collections, history books, and general books.

 

‘Ah, this book…’

 

Eleanor unconsciously picked out a book with a familiar title. It was a collection of folk tales that her mother often read to her when she was young. The copy that Eleanor had was so worn out from reading and re-reading that it was damaged. She was very glad to see it, as there were stories that were only in this edition.

 

“There’s a space where you can read books through that door. You can read it right away, or you can take it to the mansion. Please do as you wish, Madam.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yes, you don’t need to check anymore.”

 

Eleanor hesitated for a moment, then went to the place Herbert pointed out. When she opened the door and went out, a bright space with one side made of glass appeared. There were comfortable chairs and sofas placed here and there, creating a space where one could comfortably read a book.

 

“Wow, it’s amazing.”

 

Herbert smiled at her honest admiration.

 

“As I mentioned, Master’s grandfather really loved books.”

 

Holding the book she had just taken out, Eleanor turned to Herbert.

 

“Can I really… read any book here?”

 

“Of course. The Master’s grandfather would be happy too. Books exist to be read, not just to be stored.”

 

She had a feeling why this library was built on the outskirts of the Duke’s estate. The person who built it wanted it to be a space entirely for himself, without anyone else’s interference.

 

“I have to go back to the mansion for other work, but I’ll send a maid to attend to you. Please rest comfortably.”

 

“Ah, yes. Thank you very much.…Herbert.”

 

Instead of answering, Herbert bowed his head respectfully. Eleanor walked around looking for a place to sit and read. Then, her gaze seemed to fix on one spot.

 

“Herbert.”

 

“Yes, Madam.”

 

Herbert, who was about to leave, turned back.

 

“Who…used this?”

 

Where Eleanor pointed, there was an easel, a canvas, and other painting tools that seemed old but still usable.

 

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