If I was Going to Regret It Anyway

“Welcome, Eleanor. Did you rest well yesterday? You must have been tired from the long journey, do you have any discomfort?”

 

As soon as Eleanor got off the carriage, Layla rushed to her and bombarded her with questions.

 

Eleanor gave a perplexed smile.

 

“Yes, I’m fine. I rested well.”

 

“Miss Townsend.”

 

Daryl showed up behind Layla, slightly bowing his head.

 

“Duke. You didn’t have to come out to greet me…”

 

“It’s only natural for a precious guest.”

 

Looking around, there were many servants including the butler Herbert and the head maid Matilda.

 

“Welcome. We’ve been waiting for you.”

 

At Herbert’s words, the servants bowed all at once. Eleanor’s eyebrows tilted in confusion.

 

“I appreciate the hospitality, but this seems like an excessive reception. I’m not that great of a person…”

 

Eleanor whispered to Layla. Her cheeks were slightly red, seemingly embarrassed.

 

“Oh my, what are you talking about? Eleanor, you were once the madam of this Chatsworth House. It’s not excessive at all. Right, brother?”

 

“…Yes, of course.”

 

At Layla’s question, Daryl paused for a moment before slowly answering. Daryl scrutinized Eleanor with a careful gaze. He was worried that mentioning the past might have made her uncomfortable. Fortunately, there was no dark expression on Eleanor’s face.

 

“Let’s go in quickly, Eleanor. There’s so much to catch up on.”

 

“…Ah, yes.”

 

Layla took Eleanor’s hand and went into the mansion.

 

****

 

A grand feast was prepared in the dining room. It was very rare for Daryl and Layla to sit face to face for a meal. There were hardly any guests invited in recent years. The only time was a few visits from Joshua and his family after Layla’s marriage was decided.

 

Therefore, it was quite a long time since a feast of this scale was held at the Duke’s house. Despite only four people, Eleanor, Daryl, Leila, and Joshua, having a meal, the table was filled to the brim with food. From flower baskets to candlesticks placed here and there, everything was carefully selected by Layla and Herbert.

 

“Eleanor, is the food to your liking?”

 

“Ah, yes. It’s very delicious. There’s so much to eat that I’m hesitating about what to start with.”

 

“Try this beef dish. We have a new chef, and the gravy sauce is quite a specialty.”

 

“Yes, thank you, Miss Layla.”

 

“You don’t have to force yourself to eat. Just eat as much as you want.”

 

At Daryl’s words, Layla hurriedly spoke.

 

“Ah, right. Eleanor, you used to eat lightly. Don’t force yourself to eat because of what I said. You know I didn’t mean it that way, right?”

 

“Of course. Thank you.”

 

Eleanor said with a small smile.

 

Eleanor was indeed a light eater, but she also had a hard time eating well in places other than her own home. Still, knowing that this grand feast was prepared to treat Eleanor, she was eating diligently, even though she felt a bit overwhelmed. So when Daryl and Layla said this, she felt much more at ease.

 

‘Come to think of it, the three of us never had a meal together…’ 

 

It was ironic. During the time when they were a real family, there were hardly any peaceful days, but now that they had become strangers, they were treated so kindly and carefully.

 

After coming to the Duke’s house today, not only Daryl and Layla, but also the other servants treated her as if she were a distinguished guest. To be honest, she felt more bewildered than grateful. No matter how she thought about it, there was no reason for Eleanor to receive such treatment at the Duke’s house.

 

Maybe if it was Joshua, who would be Layla’s husband in the future. Ironically, Joshua was almost left out because of Eleanor. Even at the tea party earlier, Layla had turned completely towards Eleanor, showing her back to Joshua.

 

She had been so concerned about Eleanor that she ignored Joshua.

 

“…Viscount Sheppard, are you eating well?”

 

“Ah, yes. Of course. And you can just call me Joshua.”

 

Joshua smiled brightly. He was a bright and cheerful person with curly blond hair and somewhat feminine features. He still felt more like a boy than a man, which suited Layla well. Sitting side by side, they looked like a cute and lovely couple.

 

“Don’t do that again. Don’t bother Eleanor. She doesn’t like strangers acting familiar.”

 

At Layla’s words, Eleanor’s eyes widened.

 

“No, it’s not like that.”

 

“It’s not?”

 

“Would she say it’s uncomfortable in front of everyone? Eleanor is kind and deep, she can’t say such things.”

 

“I really don’t. I’m really okay. Jo, Joshua.”

 

At Eleanor’s words, Joshua burst into laughter.

 

“Your voice was shaking just now. If you’re uncomfortable, you don’t have to force yourself.”

 

“…”

 

As Eleanor blushed, Layla frowned.

 

“Don’t tease Eleanor. She’s embarrassed.”

 

“I think the problem is more that you keep doing that?”

 

“What did I do?”

 

“…No, I’m okay. So…”

 

She wishes they wouldn’t talk about her anymore. Eleanor couldn’t bring herself to say those words out loud and trailed off. But contrary to Eleanor’s wishes, the conversation during the meal was always about Eleanor. No matter how hard she tried to steer the conversation towards Joshua or the wedding, she always failed. Layla kept talking about how great a person Eleanor was, and how great she was as a painter. Eleanor sought refuge in wine, feeling embarrassed and awkward.

 

Before she knew it, she was quite drunk. Perhaps because she didn’t usually drink much, she hadn’t drunk much, but her face was already hot.

 

“Are you okay, Eleanor? Your face is red.”

 

“Ah, yes. I’m fine. I guess I’m a little drunk because I drank wine for the first time in a long time.”

 

“Do you want to go out to the terrace for a while and get some fresh air?”

 

“Ah… Can I do that?”

 

“Of course.”

 

Thinking that this was a chance to escape from this bombardment of praise and expressions of affection, Eleanor was secretly pleased. Herbert came over and pulled out her chair. Eleanor got up from her seat, staggered for a moment, and steadied herself by holding onto the table.

 

“Eleanor! Are you okay?”

 

“Yes. I just stumbled a bit. I’m fine.”

 

Layla looked at Eleanor with a worried expression, then turned her head towards Daryl.

 

“Brother, will you escort Eleanor?”

 

“Ah, no. I can go alone.”

 

“No way. What if you fall?”

 

Daryl got up and approached Eleanor.

 

“If you’re uncomfortable, I’ll ask Herbert.”

 

He whispered so that only Eleanor could hear.

 

Eleanor hesitated and looked up at Daryl. No matter what, it felt a bit strange to refuse Daryl’s help and ask Herbert instead.

 

“…Then, I’ll be troubling the Duke.”

 

Eleanor reached out to Daryl. He carefully held her small hand as if lifting it up.

 

The terrace next to the dining room was as spacious as Eleanor’s room in the Loud mansion. The moon was so bright and clear tonight that no additional lighting was needed.

 

As soon as she touched the night air, she could feel her hot cheeks cooling down. The late summer night breeze was just pleasantly cool.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

“Ah, yes. Thanks to you.”

 

She felt a heavy yet warm touch on her shoulder. Looking back, Daryl’s jacket was draped over her.

 

“It’s okay, Duke. I’m not cold at all.”

 

“You might be okay now, but your body will cool down quickly. Keep it on. At least while you’re outside.”

 

“…”

 

Seeing the sincere concern in Daryl’s eyes, she couldn’t refuse any further. Eleanor held onto the jacket and spoke softly.

 

“…Thank you.”

 

A moment of awkward silence passed. Daryl spoke in a low voice.

 

“I just realized I haven’t thanked you yet. For the gift, I really appreciate it.”

 

“Ah…Did you see it?”

 

Eleanor gave a slightly embarrassed smile.

 

“I’m not sure if you liked it. I tried my best to draw it, but I couldn’t tell if it looked like me…”

 

“It was a truly wonderful piece. No other painter could have captured it better.”

“…You flatter me.”

 

“Not at all.”

 

At his serious response, Eleanor chuckled without realizing it.

 

“I just hope it didn’t seem too pretty compared to the real thing. If you thought that, it would be too embarrassing…”

 

“Not at all. On the contrary, I think the painting couldn’t fully capture Miss Townsend’s beauty.”

 

Daryl spoke quickly, then made an awkward expression.

 

“…Ah, that’s not to say that the painting lacked completeness. As I said, it was a truly wonderful painting… It was a perfectly drawn piece. What I meant was just that, you’re too beautiful. So…”

 

“….”