If I was Going to Regret It Anyway

Seeing that, Eleanor’s eyebrows slightly furrowed.

 

“This is all under the premise that you keep your promise. Remember well. Eat three meals a day, sleep for more than seven hours, and go outside to get some sun. You understand, right? Don’t think about deceiving me when I’m not looking. I’ll ask Miss Layla and keep checking.”

 

“I understand. I promise. I will definitely keep it.”

 

Daryl hastily replied.

 

“…Alright, then.”

 

Eleanor sighed quietly, then stood up from her seat.

 

“Are you… leaving now?”

 

Daryl’s expression was full of regret. His eyes were filled with desperation, like a lost child. It was still awkward to see Daryl make such a face.

 

Hiding her complicated and strange feelings, Eleanor nodded.

 

“Yes. There’s no need for you to see me out.”

 

“..…”

 

Daryl hesitated, but seemed to think he shouldn’t go against Eleanor’s words, so he didn’t move from his seat. Eleanor left Daryl behind and left the Lilac Room.

 

****

 

Not long after, Eleanor returned to Wembury For a moment, she thought about leaving Wembury because of Daryl, but in the end, she decided not to. As she had promised Daryl, as long as he didn’t deceive her again, she intended to trust him.

 

For a few days after meeting Daryl, she felt strange. But she never regretted the decision she made. She had certainly been hurt by Daryl, and there were many memories that were so hard that she didn’t want to recall them, but she didn’t wish for him to fall and be unhappy in that way.

 

About two weeks after coming down to Wembury, she received a letter from Layla.

 

[My brother is doing well. He promises to keep his promise with Eleanor, eating meals on time, and taking a walk once in the morning and once in the evening. He seems to have slept well without medicine these days. His complexion has already improved a lot. The shadows under his eyes have also disappeared a lot. It’s all thanks to Eleanor. Thank you for forgiving my brother. 

 

The weather here in the capital has already started to cool down. How is it in Wembury? I hope you are healthy and safe there. I’ll write again. 

 

Leila Lloyd. 

 

P.S. There will be a letter from my brother after this. If you don’t want to read it, you can just burn it. It’s what my brother himself said, so if you feel even a little uncomfortable, don’t mind it and do so.] 

 

Eleanor hesitated for a moment with the letter in her hand. But not long after, she unfolded the next page.

 

[Miss Townsend. 

 

I wondered for a long time whether it was okay to write this letter. I told Layla, but if you don’t want to read my letter, you can burn it. I wanted to express my gratitude to Miss Townsend in any way. You probably can’t imagine how much of a salvation the words you said to me that day were to me.

 

Although it was a deception to Miss Townsend, the days I spent in Wembury were a great happiness to me. Looking at you from afar, exchanging letters with you, it was infinitely joyful and thrilling. So when I thought I could never see Miss Townsend again, a great despair came upon me. Because of that, I worried the people around me and even showed Miss Townsend a sight I shouldn’t have. 

 

Of course, I don’t expect to spend those days again. I won’t exaggerate the mercy Miss Townsend has bestowed upon me, nor will I harbor expectations I shouldn’t. I have already disposed of the mansion I had in Wembury. There will be no more circling around Miss Townsend without her knowing. It’s regrettable that I can’t see Miss Townsend from afar as I did then, but I humbly accept it. 

 

I already knew that it was an excessive happiness for me. And since it’s not decided that I can’t see you again, I’m satisfied with just that fact. In fact, I am a person who does not deserve your mercy. But please forgive my weakness that I have no choice but to rely on that mercy. I will always wish for your happiness. 

 

Daryl Allen Lloyd.]

 

This was the first letter she received in Daryl’s name. Reading this letter, she felt that the letters she had received from Lewis Wilson were indeed written by Daryl. Eleanor folded the letter neatly and put it back in the envelope. And she put it in the letter box. The box contained all the letters she had received in Wilson’s name so far.

 

[To Duke Griffith] 

 

After writing ‘To the Duke’, she felt strange and stopped her pen for a while.

 

[I’ve exchanged dozens of letters in the name of Mr. Wilson, but this is the first time I’m writing a letter to the Duke. But all those letters must have been written by the Duke. As I told you before, those letters were a great joy and warm comfort to me. So when I found out that it was a lie, I was very upset. But the Duke said that the words contained in those letters were all sincere. Thinking about it, we lived together as a couple for a year, but I feel like I hardly know anything about the Duke. Recently, the Duke has done a lot of things that the Duke I knew would never do. Of course, it’s largely because the Duke has changed a lot since then. That’s why I kept doubting the Duke’s intentions. 

 

To be honest, I still haven’t completely gotten rid of my doubts and confusion. But if it’s true that the Duke has changed, I thought I’d like to get to know him. That’s why I’m writing this letter. I hope we can continue to exchange letters like this. Just like we did in the name of Mr. Wilson. 

 

Of course, it won’t be as often as before. My reply may be much later than the Duke expects. But if that’s okay, please reply to this letter. I heard from Miss Layla that the Duke is keeping his promise with me. Please continue to take care of your body and mind. Not because you promised me, but for the Duke himself. I’ll stop here. 

 

1. L. Townsend.]

 

***

 

A year has passed since then. It was the second summer since Eleanor moved to Wembury. That day, the Townsend mansion was busy with guests from morning. Since moving to Wembury, there had been no formal reception of guests, so the servants, including Peggy, seemed a bit nervous but excited. The guest who was scheduled to visit today was none other than Layla.

 

The opportunity was Layla’s letter. [Would it be okay to visit Wembley once if Eleanor is okay? I’ve been curious because I’ve only heard stories through letters from Eleanor. Soon it will be Eleanor’s birthday, and I want to congratulate her in person. Of course, if Eleanor doesn’t like it, I’ll stop.]

 

Layla and Eleanor had regained their close relationship as they had before Eleanor divorced Daryl, by exchanging letters steadily for a year.

 

[Everyone in this mansion loved you. After you left the Duke, this place felt like an empty house. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one who felt that way. I’m willing to bet. Everyone really… missed you.]

Honestly, she didn’t fully believe what he said. Nevertheless, it was true that she had become more open to Layla than before.

 

Layla sent two or three times as many replies to Eleanor’s letters. She reported her daily life in detail and was endlessly curious about Eleanor’s whereabouts. By exchanging letters several times a month, they became closer than when they met regularly. Eleanor first wrote a word of refusal, saying, “It’s a long way, so I don’t know if it’s a burden.” And she added, “But if it’s okay, you can come to play anytime.”

 

That’s how the visit was arranged. When the afternoon came and the sun began to tilt, a large carriage, which was hard to see in this area, arrived in front of the mansion.

 

“Eleanor!”

 

As soon as Layla got off the carriage, she smiled brightly. It was a bright face that was hard to believe for someone who had been traveling for two days by changing to a carriage from a train.

 

“Welcome, Miss Layla. You’ve had a long journey.”

 

“No, it was fun and exciting because it was my first time coming this far.”

 

While the servants were busy unloading the luggage, Eleanor took Layla into the mansion.

 

“It’s a cozy and nice house. It looks very comfortable.”

 

Layla looked around and said. As a lady who had lived in a mansion ten times the size of this one all her life, it was a fairly heart-felt compliment. Eleanor quietly smiled.