Chapter 6
“Everyone is talking about whether you want to die at the hands of the Duke.”
“Because he’s the person who hates being bothered the most.”
Even after Cecil left, her words revolved around me the whole time.
In the midst of confusion, not knowing what to believe, the expressions that Raynan had shown in the past flashed past at once.
What if his cold face wasn’t normal, but expressed a worse feeling than at any other time?
Standing with a pale face as if the world had collapsed, I immediately came to my senses.
Would it be better to run away now?
Erin and Cecil said the opposite, but when I disappeared, the result was the same. If I disappear quietly from here, no one will find me.
It was a much better choice than being quietly dragged away without anyone knowing. It’s better for me, no doubt, and wouldn’t that be much better for Raynan?
Because you don’t have to harm people unnecessarily.
“What do you mean, really?”
I ruffled my hair nervously. It wasn’t like I could think straight, but I felt like I was going to run around screaming if I didn’t do something.
That was a big deal. It was the kind of behavior that would draw anyone out.
I pondered for a moment about what would be a happy ending for Raynan, Edwin, and myself.
Is there really an ending where everyone can be happy?
The answer was not easily found, but instead, my body moved spontaneously.
Now. Let’s run. You have to run to live.
After all, it was better to leave quickly and find a comfortable life than to live here anxiously.
“Renee?”
Shortly after moving forward, Edwin’s call was heard.
I can’t look back, the moment you look back, your determination will be shaken.
I must have thought so, but why is my body turning so stiffly backwards.
“Young master Edwin?”
Edwin was wearing a pale pink shirt and a beige jacket. Plus a bow tie.
Yes. After all, the young master wears a bow tie.
It was the dress I chose, but it suited him better than I expected. The fear that filled me with the appearance of Edwin, who looked like a little groom, was quickly forgotten.
“You look so good.”
Edwin, who looked a bit anxious, smiled at my words.
Up until now, I had gone to see Raynan alone, but today was the day I decided to go with Edwin.
She doesn’t give up, he listens to the story until the end and sometimes asks questions, so I decided to take Edwin along.
Would it be okay?
I was more comfortable when I didn’t know. As I was mourning inwardly, Edwin asked with anticipation.
“Is it good?”
“Yes. Very much.”
Looking at Edwin’s face with mixed tension and anticipation, made it impossible for me to tell him to call it a day.
It’s been okay so far, so it’ll be okay today, I have to believe that.
I lowered myself and straightened Edwin’s crooked tie. He was pleased with my outfit, too, and stuck his chest out in front of me.
I could barely hold back the laughter that was about to burst out of the pride I felt from the way he was full of energy and asked a question.
“Did you bring it?”
“Yes.”
I nodded my head when I saw the package and the paper held in his little raised hands.
“Shall we go then?”
I can’t believe I’m actually saying the words, “Shall we go?” after hearing Cecil’s story.
It was the most depressing thing I’d said in a long time, and I couldn’t bring myself to say it in front of Edwin. I could only smile as brightly as I felt.
“Yes.”
I took Edwin’s nodding hand and started to retrace our steps back to the path we’d rushed down earlier.
Yes, let’s go. I knew this would happen. I didn’t think I’d run right into Edwin.
No, that’s why it’s good or bad to keep showing up in front of Raynan? Maybe Erin was right.
I struggled to repeat my hopes until I reached Raynan’s office.
The hope, which had spread little by little, disappeared in front of the big and thick door.
In its place, I tried to harbor a little hope. Maybe he wouldn’t be in the office today, or maybe he’d be too busy and send me back.
“Come in.”
The servant’s voice, speaking politely to Edwin, informed her that her expectations were in vain.
Contrary to how worried and frightened she was, Raynan didn’t look much different from other times, which only made me more nervous.
Because I didn’t know that the appearance I thought was a daily thing might actually be an expression of his displeasure. I paid more attention than the other days and looked into Raynan’s eyes.
Just as I was beginning to wonder if it was weird for him to even blink, I felt warmth fill my hand.
Fortunately, I wasn’t alone. The warmth that started from my hands calmed my heart little by little.
Even as an adult, I get nervous, but Edwin was no different.
I could tell by the way the tiny hand that held mine never stopped twitching.
When I turned my head, Edwin’s face with a faint smile came into view.
Dressed like this and standing upright, he looked quite proud. The swaying eyes showed his anxiety as it was.
Edwin’s expression relaxed a little when I gave strength to the hand I was holding with the feeling that he had nothing to worry about.
Relieved, I turned my head and made eye contact with Roman, who was leaving the office.
Perhaps Roman had been looking at me the whole time. It’s also a pretty meaningful look.
What? Is this wrong? Am I on the wrong track?
Roman would know. But I couldn’t get through to him with my eyes.
He shook his head as if he knew it. The emotion that flashed through Roman’s eyes confused me even more.
Remorse? Or mourning? What? What are those eyes!
I wanted to hold him and ask him. I’m just glad I wasn’t too crazy to put it into action.
All I could do was follow him with anxious eyes.
“What?”
I must have been half out of my mind. I turned my back on Raynan to see Roman.
I was awakened by Raynan’s cold voice. As I turned around quickly, I caught his eye with his hands interlocked and clenched his chin.
“Today is….”
I hoped he didn’t notice the slight tremor at the end of my voice. Raynan asked, unable to wait for that brief moment to swallow her saliva.
“Today is?”
“I came here because Edwin wanted to give the Duke the first card he wrote.”
“Card?”
“Yes. And we baked some cookies, if you’d like to try them.”
Because I had thought about what to say in advance, there were no stuttering incidents. Thanks to that, even if my voice was trembling, it didn’t seem to make a big difference.
Breathing in, I pulled Edwin’s hand slightly forward.
The hand I thought was about to fall off was still holding my hand tightly. Edwin looked up at me and nodded my head slightly.
This alone would have conveyed my support for him.
Again, Edwin nodded vigorously as if he understood without saying a word. His back, moving with a rather wretched expression, was quite dignified and cute.
Edwin seemed perplexed for a moment when he couldn’t even get closer to Raynan, let alone reach out to him.
“These are cards and cookies I made.”
Despite his frustration, Edwin continued. As he watched his hand in midair, Raynan extended her arm.
Raynan accepted without saying a word, and just stared at the card and cookies without any expression for a moment.
“Then we’ll leave…”
Before I say anything, we have to leave quickly. As if Edwin had the same idea, the two of us leaving the office were cleaner and quicker than ever.
After leaving the office, Edwin and I just walked without saying a word.
Was Edwin’s bedroom this far away? As soon as we arrived at the bedroom, which felt far away as much as the psychological burden, and closed the door, I took a deep breath.
Edwin, who had his back on the door, was also breathing with a relieved face.
“He accepted it.”
“Yes. I was very nervous, but I’m glad that my father liked it.”
“Right?”
Liked it? I couldn’t tell by looking back at Raynan’s reaction. I think he was more expressionless than usual.
In fact, he usually smiled coldly, and today there was no expression, so it may be that he liked it more than other times.
“Actually, it’s a secret….”
There were only the two of us in the bedroom, but Edwin muffled his voice. He wiggled his feet and even made a hand gesture, so I lowered my head as he wished.
“My father really hates being bothered.”
“… Really?”
What if the one I missed earlier was the only chance to extend my life?
My fingertips were cold and numb. I felt like my blood wasn’t flowing properly, so I squeezed and stretchedmyher hand repeatedly.
Erin? Edwin seems to be of the same opinion as Cecil. What happened?
I had to go see Erin right away. It seemed like I had to give her a check again to see if it was really good to stand out from Raynan.
In the rush of thoughts that filled my head, I had momentarily forgotten about Edwin. I leaned toward him and pulled myself upright.
“Renee?”
Edwin looked at me frozen and made a worried face.
“Are you afraid of my father? You can rest now.”
Edwin, who had found the answer on his own as to why I was doing this, took my hand.
It wasn’t what he’d guessed, but he was right after all.
“No. However, every time young master Edwin was talking, I always listened carefully to the end.”
“Really?”
“Yes. It’s just that I’m a little nervous.”
Erin should come back later. If she walked out of here like this, she’d never find out and Edwin would be left to his own.
“Do you think he’ll like it?”
It may have been a question he wanted to keep asking. I think I understand his heart, so I answered more brightly.
“Of course. You made the cards and cookies really well. He will be delighted.”
“But cookies… Is it really okay? What if he gets mad at me for doing something out of place?”
Out of place. Who the hell taught him such a thing?
Edwin would often surprise me with an un-ageable vocabulary. However, when Edwin showed that he was aware of these unnecessary emotions, I had no choice but to feel heartbroken.
“Is it possible? Originally, parents said that if a child made something for them, they would be happy with it.”
“Really?”
Although I had only come up with a common-sense answer, Edwin still had uneasy eyes.
“Yes. My parents were clutching them to their chests all day when I gave them paper flowers the other day.”
When I spoke with a loud beckoning voice in an exaggerated voice, Edwin showed a slightly relieved look.
It was then. The bedroom door swung open.
It was none other than Raynan who appeared quite noisy.
“Duke?”
Why is he here?
It seemed that Edwin was the same. Raynan looked at me and Edwin in turn as we blinked in surprise.
Immediately without hesitation, he strode forward without hesitation, and asked, showing what he had in his hand.
“What the hell is this…?”
