Chapter 36
“Huh? Me? I don’t think I can be of much help…”
“No, Renee can.”
“What are you asking me to help you with?”
“Renee, are you saying you will soon marry the duke?”
“Huh? Oh, that….”
Since I couldn’t tell Erin the truth, I just smiled awkwardly and blurted out my words, just like I did with everyone else.
Anyway, Erin didn’t really care about my answer. From the beginning, it seemed like she had decided what she wanted no matter what answer I gave.
“If you become a Duchess, won’t Renee need a maid? Then call me, okay?”
“No, the duchess….”
“Well, how are you going to hold out until then? So do it as soon as you can, okay? Renee can have me as her maid even now.”
I don’t think this is a problem I can help with.
Erin didn’t seem to see my surprised face at all.
“Renee, huh? We’re friends. Please help me.”
“No, I would like to help if possible, but… I don’t think it’s something I can do.”
At my words, Erin buried her face in her knees and began to cry bitterly.
“Erin, Erin. First of all, don’t cry and just calm down.”
It was Chase’s voice in the distance that stopped Erin’s tears, which were unstoppable.
“Renee?”
As Chase’s voice drew closer, she seemed wary of even breathing.
Something’s definitely up with her…
Only after Chase’s voice faded away again did Erin take a deep breath and speak urgently.
“Please keep the fact that you met me a secret. You can’t tell anyone. Understand?”
“Yes. That’s not difficult…”
“Thank you. You’re the only one I’ll trust, Renee.”
“Erin?”
She smiled and hugged me, as if she understood my answer to be something else entirely: that I wouldn’t tell anyone I’d met Erin.
Before she could correct her mistake, Erin looked around, covered her face, and started running quickly.
Her back, which disappeared in an instant, looked quite dangerous.
“Bullying? who? how? why?”
The only thing left was the memory of comforting Erin. Even after thinking about it again, what she said was still incomprehensible.
The conversation with her didn’t contain anything important, and in the end, all that was left was Erin’s misunderstanding and my surprise.
“It definitely seems like something bad is going on.”
It was Erin who always led the mood among people.
Even when I was too busy and not socializing with people and living a hectic life, Erin constantly came to me.
The woman before seemed like a completely different person.
Even while she was crying sadly, she looked around anxiously, as well as the cold look she gave me from time to time.
“Renee.”
Chase, who had run ahead of me, was turning back. I was barely able to pull myself out of Erin’s thoughts at the sound of Chase’s voice calling out to me.
“Oh, Chase.”
“Where have you been?”
“Huh? I just kept walking?”
“Really? Then did you run into anyone?”
Erin’s face appeared in Chase’s question. That desperate face that told her to keep it a secret.
“What? no.”
“Really?”
After hearing my answer, Chase started looking around. Then he glanced briefly in the direction where Erin had disappeared.
There was no one where Chase looked. Erin had long since disappeared.
Is it because my conscience pricked me? Chase’s eyes seemed meaningful, so I said something to divert his attention and walked away.
“What did Marvin say?”
“I don’t know. He only talks about strange things.”
Fortunately, Chase looked away and started walking towards the stables.
“Strange story?”
“What kind of snack would it be better to bring young master Edwin while he’s drawing? Don’t you think young master Edwin has grown a lot taller these days?”
“Yes? Is it.”
“Yeah. And why not…”
“Huh?”
“No. I think there might have been some other reason.”
“Any other reasons?”
Chase closed his mouth in response to my question and became lost in thought.
I didn’t want to disturb him, but I felt like I should know if it had anything to do with Edwin.
“Why else?”
However, Chase never answered the repeated questions.
As I was contemplating whether to ask one last question, I found myself getting closer to the stable.
“Huh?”
“What’s the matter?”
When I felt a different atmosphere than other times, I stopped walking and Chase looked at me curiously.
“No, something is different…”
Instead of the usual calm and comfort, there was a lot of busyness and tension.
As if to confirm my senses, I saw a lot of people bustling around.
“Ah… I’ll go then.”
“Yes, thank you.”
Even after Chase left, I stayed there for a while.
It was because I didn’t know if something was going on or if it was okay for me to interfere.
“Renee, are you here?”
“Amelia.”
It was Amelia who put an end to my worries. She welcomed me with a smile like she always did.
“What’s going on?”
“Oh, it’s a bit complicated, right? I thought I’d try a different method today.”
“Different method?”
Instead of explaining the different method, Amelia smiled and turned her head. As she followed her gaze she saw a familiar face.
Attendants and knights who were not usually seen here were moving around busily. And even among them, there was someone who stood out. He was none other than Raynan.
When he found me, he slowly started walking towards me.
Even though people were moving around, they couldn’t stop glancing at Raynan and me.
“You look beautiful today.”
“Th-thank you. But what are you doing here?”
“You haven’t even ridden a horse properly yet?”
Instead of answering, I gave a shy smile. He held out his hand to me and said.
“So I came to help.”
Naturally, I also raised my hand and Raynan slowly began to lead me.
“You’re helping me?”
“Even if I’m not as confident as Amelia, I’m confident in horseback riding.”
He looked down at me and raised the corners of his mouth coolly.
It was only for a moment that I was distracted by his smile. It was only for a short time, but in that short period of time, a big challenge was looming ahead.
“Oh, no! wait a minute! Duke?”
“Yes? All you have to do is just lean on it. Don’t worry, I’ll never drop you.”
“No, I’m not mentally prepared yet….”
Everything was ready, as if they were waiting for me to arrive. I literally just wasn’t prepared my heart.
I tried to step back, wanting to escape, but his hand was wrapped around mine and he would not let me go.
“Focus only on me.”
Raynan came closer in an instant and spoke with a serious face.
As I looked at his unwavering eyes, I felt a little at ease.
When I relaxed my body, he smiled and brushed my cheek, saying I did well.
It was the second time today. I was distracted by Raynan’s smile.
And this time too, things progressed quickly while I was distracted for a moment.
Raynan held my hand tightly for a moment and then quickly got on the horse. He then lowered his body and held out his hand to me.
I took a step back without realizing it as the horse moved slowly. It seemed like I was rejecting it, but my body didn’t move as I wanted.
But Raynan didn’t look offended. Instead, he brought his hand up and began to gently stroke the horse.
“It’s okay.”
He whispered several times in a voice so low that I could barely hear him.
I could tell that the soft yet friendly words were not just words but were directed at me. Because I knew that there was no need to appease a well-trained horse now.
Of course, his hands were carefully encouraging his words, but his eyes were fixed on me.
After whispering several more times that it was okay, Raynan held out his hand more cautiously than before.
I walked forward slowly. It took quite some time to get to the horse’s side and to raise my hand, but Raynan waited without moving a single inch.
The moment his hand wrapped around mine, I thought I had made a mistake, but it was already too late.
I was surprised and tried to pull my hand away, but Raynan was faster than me.
At the same time I felt a force pulling my hand, Amelia lifted me up from behind.
In an instant, I was on the horse.
“Du-Duke?”
“I will make sure no one gets hurt, so trust me.”
“No, no! Duke! That’s not the problem…”
“Now, hold here.”
I shook my head, but his hands were already full of strength.
As if to relieve my tension, he placed his hands on both of mine.
“There’s no need to be so nervous.”
Still, his stiff body showed no signs of loosening up easily. But Raynan patted my hand without saying anything.
“Lean slowly.”
When I kept my back straight despite Raynan’s soft voice, he smiled slightly and gently wrapped my shoulders around, making me lean against his chest.
How much time has passed? Little by little, my hands began to lose strength.
Raynan, who was wrapping my hand, noticed the change in me and spoke in a friendly voice.
“I promise. Nothing dangerous will happen.”
“… Yes.”
“Let’s start slowly.”
Raynan did as he said and began to move very slowly.
However, Raynan’s waiting for a long time was meaningless, and my body became stiff again with tension. My eyes suddenly closed tightly.
As my body moved with my vision completely blocked, I began to feel nauseous. Raynan behind me smiled slightly as if he could see me.
“It would be scarier if you closed your eyes.”
When his breath and voice reached my ear, I opened my eyes without realizing it.
It was fortunate that Raynan’s arms were firmly supporting me on both sides of my waist, preventing me from swaying.
Even so, I unconsciously raised my voice as I felt my heart sinking.
“No, don’t startle me!”
“I don’t mean to startle you…”
There was a bit of regret in Raynan’s voice as he answered.
Meanwhile, the horse was walking slowly.
It was obviously the same speed as before, but it felt like I was walking slower than when I closed my eyes. Is it thanks to that?
The tension began to leave my body again little by little.
“It feels different again, doesn’t it?”
“It does.”
It was just as Raynan said. Seen from above, it felt quite different.
The horse that looked so big didn’t seem quite so big now that I was up there.
I wasn’t completely relaxed yet, but my racing heart had at least slowed down a bit.
“How about hanging out with Chase?”
“It’s definitely comfortable because people don’t approach me often.”
“Thank goodness.”
“Thank you for your concern.”
“Of course. Rather than that, I hope we can start talking about engagement now.”
“Yes.”
“If you think it’s too urgent, we can proceed slowly, so talk comfortably.”
“No. If we’re going to do it anyway, I don’t think there’s any need to postpone it.”
“I see.”
As we talked about various things, the speed gradually increased.
It was definitely moving faster than before, but strangely it didn’t feel that scary.
“If we go ahead with the engagement, you will have to stop being young master Edwin’s nanny. Is that okay?”
“What?”
“Well, there will be many opportunities to see each other naturally, but it will be difficult to live like now. Everyone must be busy with their own schedules.”
It may have been natural, but it was a problem I had never thought about.
“I don’t think that would be a good idea.”
I don’t know if it was the running horse or the emotion in my voice.
Raynan let out a small laugh when he heard my voice sounding like I was crying.
“I see. I knew you would answer that way. Instead, let’s find a way to stay as close as possible.”
“Thank you.”
Unlike me, who was taken aback, Raynan responded that he would wait and look for an alternative.
“I’m so glad you became Edwin’s nanny.”
“I also feel very fortunate to have met young master Edwin.”
The horse that was running inside the riding range was already outside. Thanks to the refreshing wind blowing past my body, I realized that fact too late.
No, maybe it was because of Raynan who constantly talked to me.
It may also be thanks to his efforts that I was able to feel relief before fear.
The scenery that quickly passed by became a sight to behold.
My heart was still pounding, but the scary feeling I had felt at first had almost disappeared.
