The fact that this is a novel is something I will take with me to the grave. No one in this world should live their life burdened with doubts about their own free will. That would be an excruciatingly painful existence.
After much deliberation, I decided that I would keep this diary with me until the very last moment of my life, and then burn it when the end was so near that there could be no doubt.
I can only hope that my mind will be sharp enough to recognize that moment when it comes.
That night, I began to feel unwell. The stress and tension from the hunting competition seemed to have finally taken their toll on my body.
＊ ＊ ＊
I spent two days in a feverish daze, barely conscious.
On the third day, I finally had enough strength to sit up, and I asked Miranda, who had been tending to me the entire time, about Princess Ariel’s condition.
“The Count and Countess were summoned to the Empress this morning.”
“Really?”
“Oh, and Lord Stanley sent a letter as well.”
“Ares did? When?”
“It arrived yesterday afternoon, but you were sleeping, so I didn’t want to disturb you.”
Ares must have sent this letter despite his own injuries not being light. Touched, I quickly opened the letter to read it.
Miranda asked me with a worried expression.
“I heard that the young master is seriously injured too. Is he alright?”
My voice naturally grew heavy as I replied.
“He says he’s in a lot of pain. He really wants to see me, but what should I do?”
“What do you mean, ‘what should you do’? Surely you’re not planning to visit him in your current condition?”
Miranda was shocked as she saw me slowly trying to get up.
“I have to go. After resting for several days, I can move around now.”
Knowing how stubborn I could be, Miranda grumbled but still helped me prepare for the outing. Since I was also unwell, it was too much to dress up elaborately, so I simply brushed my hair neatly and put on the most comfortable dress I had.
“Alright, I’ll be back. If my parents return, please let them know I went to see Ares.”
“Understood.”
For the first time in a while, I rode my carriage alone and headed to the Stanley Duke’s residence. Perhaps because I was still feeling the effects of the fever, I felt chills even under the scorching sunlight.
The Duke’s butler, upon seeing me, spoke with concern.
“Lady Uranus, you seem to be unwell as well.”
“I’ve been dealing with a fever for a few days. Are the Duke and Duchess at the palace?”
“Yes, they are.”
I nodded, assuming that the Empress had summoned both my parents and Ares’ parents together.
The butler politely knocked on Ares’ door.
Now that I think about it, this is the first time I’ve been to Ares’ bedroom! Oh my, my heart suddenly started pounding!
From inside, I heard Ares’ voice.
“Come in.”
The butler gestured to me. I nodded slightly to indicate I understood, then opened the door myself and stepped inside.
Ares, who was sitting up in bed with his back against the headboard, looked shocked when he saw me enter.
“Bianca!”
I tried hard to suppress the surge of emotions welling up inside me, making sure my voice didn’t tremble.
“Ares, how’s your arm?”
Ares was dressed comfortably in pajamas. Though it wasn’t visible, I assumed his wounds were bandaged underneath. I felt slightly relieved.
“You lost quite a bit of blood that day. I was really worried.”
Wow, with every breath I took, it felt like the room was filled with Ares’s scent, flowing into my body on its own! I wanted to keep breathing it in, but if I did, I might end up struggling to breathe. I had to restrain myself.
Ares smiled softly.
“The wound wasn’t as deep as I thought. But more importantly…”
His gaze darkened.
“You look worse off. Could you come closer?”
Without responding, I moved to the side of Ares’s bed. As I got closer, I caught a whiff of the strong smell of antiseptic that I hadn’t noticed from the door. I felt like I might cry.
Ares moved his uninjured arm and reached out to me. I instinctively took his hand.
“I got your letter yesterday, but I couldn’t reply right away. Actually, I’ve been sick since that day too.”
His expression became conflicted.
“And yet you pushed yourself to come see me.”
“Hehe, you said you wanted to see me. How could I not… oh!”
Suddenly, Ares pulled my hand toward him with a strong tug!
I had no choice but to fall onto the bed, and before I knew it, I was trapped in his arms!
Isn’t his arm hurting? How could he move so quickly?
“Ares…”
I was about to ask if his arm was okay, but then I met his eyes looking down at me, and I couldn’t say another word.
Was he crying? Or maybe smiling? His golden eyes were filled with countless emotions, swirling intensely.
I was so overwhelmed by the strange power of his gaze that I couldn’t move, almost forgetting to breathe.
Am I about to be devoured by Ares like this?
Our legs intertwined, and even the lightest touch of our knees sent a thrilling sensation coursing through my skin, making my body shudder.
Ares’s face slowly descended toward mine, and before I could close my slightly parted lips, he plunged into them with fiery intensity. As if unwilling to let even the smallest pleasure escape, Ares explored thoroughly, persistently, and with no gaps left unturned.
It wasn’t rough, but it revealed a raw and unbridled desire.
The heat emanating from his lips, his tongue, and his entire body pressed against mine was so intense that I felt like I might melt away completely. With each breath, all I could sense was Ares—nothing else existed.
His fingers intertwined with mine as they lay carelessly on the bed, and he gently locked them together. I didn’t want to resist this embrace.
Our heated breaths mingled naturally, and even when our lips parted for a brief moment, he seemed reluctant, continuing to stir me with that soft yet fervent touch.
My mind became hazy.
I wasn’t sure how long I remained trapped in Ares’s arms, but when he finally pulled away from my lips, I could only gasp for breath, still exhilarated.
“…Your body is so hot,” I whispered, and Ares smiled with a faint, narrow-eyed grin. I quickly added, almost as an excuse, “It’s because my fever hasn’t completely gone down.”
“Don’t get up; just stay here. We’re both still recovering,” Ares said, his voice gentle.
I smiled, and he offered his uninjured arm as a pillow. I lay on my side, facing him.
“Bianca, is there anything you want to ask me?”
“Is your arm feeling better now?”
He chuckled. “Not that.”
Huh? I asked a question, so why does he look so exasperated? Is that not the question he wanted?
Ugh, what does he expect me to ask? Is he trying to play a guessing game?
Seeing my expression, Ares sighed deeply.
“Aren’t you curious about what happened at the hunting grounds?”
“Oh….”
I swallowed a bitter smile deep inside.
I didn’t really want to know. What good would it do to hear about what happened? No doubt, it would just set the stage for Ares and Leia to become future lovers.
However, Ares seemed determined to talk about it, contrary to my wishes. Seeing this, I smiled as if to reassure him.
“You saved the princess and Lady Saturnus. That’s enough for me. I’ll hear the details from my parents when they return from the palace.”
“No, I want to tell you myself.”
Ares’s tone was surprisingly firm. He slid his fingers through my hair, gently combing it as if trying to soothe me.
I kept my mouth shut and waited for him to speak. After a short pause, he began.
“When we ventured deep into the forest, Princess Ariel had her guards fall back. She told them not to interfere because the prey was nearby. Eventually, the guards had no choice but to comply with her command.”
“……”
“I was the only one left with them. When I sensed something, the princess thought it was her prey and aimed her gun, but unexpectedly, it turned out to be a person.”
Ares continued.
As the princess realized it wasn’t an animal but a person hiding there, she yelled in anger. Suddenly, the assailant aimed his gun at the princess. Without hesitation, Ares shot the man with his hunting rifle.
As the gunshot rang out, another attacker appeared from somewhere. Unfortunately, Leia was standing in the direction where this second assailant aimed. In a hurry, Ares pushed Leia out of the way. As the two of them fell together, the bullet grazed Ares’s arm.
When the guards, alerted by the gunfire, arrived on horseback, the assailant gave up on further attacks and fled. One of the three guards left to inform the emperor of the attack, another pursued the attacker, and the last one stayed close to protect Princess Ariel.
To stop the bleeding from Ares’s wound, they searched for something to use as a bandage. Fortunately, there was the handkerchief I had given him.
“…I really didn’t want to use it, but there was so much blood that I had no choice.”
As he said this, his expression was filled with deep regret.
“But one handkerchief wasn’t enough. Then Leia took out hers and tied it around my arm too.”
Did Ares know? Did he know that the handkerchief Leia used was something she had painstakingly made just for him?
But I had no intention of telling him. If he knew, there was nothing I could do about it, but if he didn’t, I wanted to keep it that way. Why would I reveal Leia’s feelings to Ares? There was no need to remind him, “She likes you!” and make him start paying attention to her.
Once someone starts paying special attention to another, it often leads to special interest. And I absolutely do not want Leia to receive Ares’s special attention.
At least not while I’m still alive.
Ares continued speaking.
“I tried to find your handkerchief later, but it was already gone. I truly felt like crying… Sigh…”
I let out a small laugh.
“Hehe, if you miss it that much, I’ll make you another one.”
“…Really?”
“Of course!”
As I answered cheerfully, Ares’s eyes softened, and his face lit up with obvious joy.
Oh no, not that smile again. It makes me want to give him everything, even my heart.
Ares wrapped his arm around my waist as I lay there. Through the opening in his pajamas, I caught a glimpse of his firm chest.
Ack! Suddenly, I could feel the blood rushing to my face! We’ve already shared a deep kiss, so why am I getting flustered over just a peek of his bare skin?
As I was lost in my embarrassment, Ares whispered softly into my ear.
“When I’ve recovered from my injury, I want to go on a trip with you.”
Ugh! There it is again! That soft, enchanting voice of Ares!
I swear, no woman could resist when he whispers like that! This is too dangerous!
“Don’t you want to…?”
No! Not at all!
Like I was under a spell, I shook my head vigorously. The satisfied chuckle that followed from Ares seemed almost mischievous.
Oh, how could the great Bianca be so easily swayed by just two words of temptation!
Feeling like I had kept him company for too long, I started to rise from the bed.
“Are you leaving already?”
