The faint sense of someone nearby pulled me from my hazy slumber.
When did I fall asleep…?
I vaguely remembered returning after dinner, sifting through piles of documents about magic, glancing at the divorce papers in a fit of unease…
I must have dozed off without realizing it, unable to fight off exhaustion.
If I had studied like this in high school, I would’ve made it into Seoul National University…
Still half-asleep, I shifted my stiff body, groaning lightly as I slowly sat up.
Something felt off. A shadow flickered close by, and when I lifted my head, I saw a familiar figure perched on the desk.
“…Ian?”
Why was Ian here?
Was I dreaming?
I stared at him blankly, my half-awake mind trying to make sense of the situation. A faint tingling sensation crawled up my back from sitting slouched for so long, making me blink slowly.
It wasn’t a dream.
“Ian, when did you get here?”
I asked with a sleepy smile, but he didn’t answer.
As I stretched with a soft groan, I suddenly froze.
…Wait.
Something was wrong.
What was on my desk just now?
The realization hit me like a cold wave, and I hastily looked down at my desk.
“What’s this?”
His voice descended like a weight above my head, making my body freeze in place.
With stiff movements, I slowly turned my eyes toward him.
Ian stood slightly leaning against the desk, looking at me. His usual cerulean gaze was darker, quieter.
But that wasn’t the real issue.
In Ian’s hand was something he should never, ever have seen.
“This looks like something I wasn’t meant to find,” he said in a flat, detached tone, his eyes shifting to the paper in his hand.
“…Oh.”
My eyes widened to their limits.
Why was that in his hand?
No, more importantly, why was he suddenly in my office to begin with?
I could only gape at him, mouth slightly open, completely at a loss for words.
So this is what they mean when they say you’re too shocked to speak.
“Wife.”
“…….”
“I asked what this is.”
His voice came again, and with it, the last traces of drowsiness vanished.
Ian’s tone was low, void of warmth.
I couldn’t see his expression clearly due to the shadows cast by the overhead light, but there was one thing I knew for sure.
I was screwed.
“Wife.”
He prompted me again, and I mumbled in a small, weak voice.
“Uh, well… as you can see, they’re divorce papers.”
“Divorce papers.”
A short laugh escaped his lips, sharp and cold.
That was when my frozen brain finally began to churn.
What do I do?
But no matter how much I thought, I couldn’t come up with a solution.
Tongue-tied, I could only stammer as Ian’s gaze returned to me.
“I didn’t pry because you seemed busy with personal matters in your office….”
“…….”
“Were you preparing something like this?”
“No…”
I wanted to explain that I wasn’t actively preparing for divorce, but it was clear he wouldn’t hear me.
Unable to offer any coherent response, I clamped my lips shut. Ian’s expression hardened further.
He stared down at me for a moment before setting the papers back on the desk.
As he straightened from his seat, the shadow over me deepened.
I could only glance nervously at him, my eyes darting to follow his movements.
Finally, standing directly in front of me, Ian spoke.
“Explain.”
“Explain… what?”
“While I was holding you, kissing you, and confessing to you….”
He paused, taking a slow breath as though to steady himself before continuing in a low, deliberate voice.
“…Were you planning to leave me the entire time?”
“No, it’s not—”
“Have you suddenly grown tired of me? Or were all the words you said to me nothing but lies?”
The voice, devoid of warmth to an almost alien degree, somehow sounded wounded.
“If that’s not it, is it because I haven’t been kind enough to you? Were you feeling insecure? Or is it because of Diana Lawrence…?”
“Ian, wait a moment,” I called out to him instinctively, biting my lip.
…How am I supposed to explain this?!
I was losing my mind.
How could I tell him that this was a fictional world, that I wasn’t truly Eloise but an “outsider,” and that my presence here might disrupt this world?
That eventually, I might have to leave him, against my will, in some way or another.
Most of all, that he was destined to love someone else, and no one could predict how his feelings would change in the future.
If I blurted all that out, he’d surely look at me like I was insane.
Even I thought it sounded absurd, so how much worse would it seem to Ian?
But now that he had seen those papers, I couldn’t just brush it off like nothing had happened.
…I guess I was going to have to tell him eventually.
Though this was far from how I’d planned to do it.
In fact, I had intended to bring it up after I had thoroughly thought it through, prepared myself, and found an answer to this predicament.
This was nowhere near the plan.
In the end, I clenched my eyes shut, skipping over all those words I wanted to say.
“Ian, uh…”
“…….”
“Would you… just stamp it for now?”
What am I even saying right now?
“Excuse me, what did you just say?”
Yeah, no kidding.
His answer was utterly baffled, and honestly, I was shocked at myself too.
With my eyes still shut, I couldn’t see his face, but I didn’t need to look to know what kind of expression he was wearing.
“Listen, I’m not saying we should divorce right this moment.”
I stopped there, taking a short breath.
We had just gone on a leisurely walk together yesterday—or was it earlier today?—holding hands and smiling.
Now, I was shoving divorce papers in his face.
Of course, it made no sense.
But unfortunately, my brain had shut down in panic, leaving me incapable of coming up with a calmer response.
“Remember what we talked about when we first got married? After a year, if you wanted…”
“…You’d gladly grant me a divorce. Is that what you’re referring to?”
“Yes, that.”
“And?”
“These papers were… prepared around that time. You never know what might happen, so I thought it’d be good to have them ready. But now, half a year has already passed…”
“So, after another half-year, you plan to divorce me?”
I flinched.
“That’s not exactly what I meant,” I murmured, avoiding his gaze.
Ian didn’t respond immediately, leaving me unable to gauge his expression.
The silence stretched for what felt like an eternity.
Then Ian picked up the divorce papers from the desk.
And with a loud ripping sound, tore them apart.
I froze, wide-eyed, forgetting to even flinch.
Why is he…?
He wasn’t done. He tore them again and again until the papers were shredded to pieces, which he let fall to the floor like confetti.
The fluttering remnants landed silently on the ground.
I stared at him, dumbfounded, before lifting my gaze to meet his.
“I suppose I should make myself clear,” he said, his cerulean eyes glinting with an unreadable intensity as they bore into mine.
“Whether it’s six months or ten years from now, I have no intention of letting you go. You told me yourself, didn’t you? A true lover is someone who becomes the one and only for their partner.”
‘True love is about loving just one person. There’s no more beautiful form of love than that.’
The memory of my words from long ago surfaced. I had said that while recounting the story of Count Olson and his wife.
Of course, back then, I was talking about him and Diana, not me and him.
But there was no explaining that now, and even if I could, it wouldn’t change anything.
“If you’ve been thinking about an end…”
He stepped closer, cupping my cheek and leaning in until his breath brushed against me.
“Then you should never have looked at me with those eyes or confessed to me with that face.”
His hand moved from my cheek to my neck, then down my arm, before finally taking my hand.
Without breaking eye contact, he pressed a firm kiss to my palm, his lips lingering before giving the tender skin a playful bite.
I flinched.
“I-Ian?”
His cerulean eyes shimmered as if they were locking me in place.
“…So take responsibility,” he whispered. “You’re the one who made me this way.”
• • •
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