“Your Highness?”
Responding to the emperor’s call, Retina had gone to her ancestral home and was now standing at the entrance of the crown prince’s palace.
Upon spotting Retina, Herald ran to her and embraced her tightly. In that moment, it was as if only Retina existed in the world; nothing else could be seen or heard.
Feeling her presence with his whole being, he initially stood still in surprise, but as her hands wrapped around his back, he hugged her even tighter.
“I couldn’t find you in the bedroom, so I searched for a long time.”
“His Majesty the Emperor called for me, so I had no choice but to go.”
Retina comforted the crown prince, who often showed signs of anxiety. Though he tried not to show it, his trembling hands conveyed all the emotions he felt.
“What did the Emperor say?”
Herald asked, even dropping the honorifics towards the emperor. However, Retina was more concerned about his condition than answering his question.
“Why is your face so hot again? At this rate, you might have a headache. Are you running a fever?”
“What did he say!”
Herald, holding onto Retina’s shoulders, shouted. Still afraid that Retina might suddenly leave, he sought to confirm that the emperor’s words hadn’t shaken her resolve.
Retina showed a troubled expression, pressing her lips together. She hadn’t yet decided how to explain things to him and wanted to avoid the conversation.
“He wants me to visit the North for a while,” Retina said, trying to sound as if it were no big deal. She couldn’t bring herself to honestly tell him that the emperor had suggested they separate under the pretense of her needing to go to the North.
Herald’s expression changed completely at the mention of the North. How could she relay the emperor’s words exactly as they were?
“No. Absolutely not. I can’t send you there, knowing what that place is like.”
Herald clung to her as if she had said she was leaving immediately.
“I can’t live without you. Don’t leave me.”
Herald’s anxiety had only worsened over time. He was terrified that the indispensable Retina might one day suddenly leave his side.
“Where would I go without you, Your Highness? It’s just a short visit. I can’t avoid going entirely after receiving a title.”
“You can’t go alone. If you must go, let’s go together.”
“Your Highness, to the North? Do you really think Their Majesties would allow it?”
“And do you think I can allow you to go alone?”
Retina gently stroked Herald’s back as he stubbornly insisted. Understanding his childlike plea, she found it difficult to simply push him away.
“Alright, alright. Let’s go inside first.”
Although everyone in the Crown Prince’s palace was aware of the relationship between Retina and the Crown Prince, Retina was still embarrassed about displaying affection in such an open space. She gently tried to soothe him.
The Crown Prince ignored Tetton, who stood nearby, as if he were invisible, but it wasn’t easy to do so.
Retina smiled at Tetton, who had turned his gaze away as if he had seen something he shouldn’t have, and then she entered the palace.
Herald, holding tightly onto Retina’s arm, led her to the bedroom and locked the door behind them, making sure no one could come in or go out.
“If you must go to the North, say that you will go with me. This social season is crucial; if relations with the North improve, Rudenheim will also send an envoy. If I lead the delegation, as Prince Norden did, no one can stop us.”
Even when alone with her, Herald tried to persuade Retina. Just when they had finally managed to be together, she spoke of going to the North. To him, it was a bolt from the blue.
“When I return, we can be together. If I become part of Raglaras, we can establish the marriage alliance that was planned with Prince Norden through our own union. Just wait a little longer.”
Retina tried to speak as positively as possible, but Herald knew it wasn’t reasonable to hold onto her given his circumstances. Yet, he couldn’t let her go because he felt he would die if she wasn’t by his side.
“Why do I feel like if you go, I’ll never see you again?”
Herald took Retina’s hand, which was comforting him, and brought it to his face.
Seeing Retina silently bite her lip, Herald buried his face in her palm. Retina swallowed her tears, looking at Herald clinging to her. How could she leave him when he turned pale and searched frantically if she was out of sight for even a moment? How could she tell him they needed to part ways when even her promise to return couldn’t reassure him?
She turned her head to hide her reddening eyes, not wanting to reveal her complicated feelings to the Crown Prince. She didn’t want to shake his newfound stability.
‘Is separating truly the only solution for us?’
Forcing her gloomy emotions aside, Retina smiled and sat next to Herald. She gently stroked his cheek with her thumb and made a light-hearted joke.
With so little time left for them to be alone together, they couldn’t afford to dwell in sadness over something that hadn’t even happened yet.
“Tonight is my last night here, so are you going to keep sulking?”
Retina cupped his cheeks with both hands, making him look at her. Even a somewhat forced smile can be infectious. As Herald’s expression gradually softened upon seeing her smile, Retina felt relieved and let her smile broaden.
Herald’s face, now tilted with his eyes closed, drew closer. Wrapping her arms around his head, Retina felt his lips gently press down on hers. Their bodies pressed together, she parted her lips, allowing his tongue to explore inside. Their breaths grew heavy, but neither of them pulled away, sharing a deep and passionate kiss.
The conflicts that had been troubling them ceased to be obstacles, at least for this moment. They indulged in each other as if they were the only two people in the world.
They moved with the hope of making this possibly last night in the Crown Prince’s palace the sweetest it could ever be.
****
On the day the northern envoys were due to arrive, Retina returned to the Duke’s estate.
It had been a fortnight since the riding event had ended inconclusively, and the members of the Deneuve family came out to greet Retina as she arrived in a royal carriage.
“Are you all better now?”
“All better? I’ve been well for a while.”
“Did that rascal Herald mistreat you while you were staying at the Crown Prince’s palace? Like locking you up in the bedroom?”
“No, not at all. When the doctor insisted on complete rest, it was a bit restrictive, but once I got the all-clear, he even took me for walks. Everyone treated me so well that I couldn’t tell if I was a member of the royal family or the nobility.”
As Retina got out of the carriage, she was embraced one by one by her family members, moving from one to another. Finally, she threw herself into the arms of the Duke of Deneuve, clinging to his waist like a ten-year-old child, unwilling to let go.
“The child who once didn’t even reach my waist has grown so much. Staying in a man’s bedroom for half a month without her parents’ permission.”
“…What?”
“Even though the situation was urgent, you’re still an unmarried young lady. The royal family will be held accountable in some way.”
“F-Father?”
Retina, startled by the Duke’s serious tone, looked up at him.
“When you say you’ll hold the royal family accountable, you’re just joking, right?”
Ha ha, Father’s jokes are something else. I didn’t know he could joke like this. She tried to laugh it off, but the shadow cast on his face by the sunlight was more serious than ever.
‘Is he serious?’
Retina widened her eyes and took a step back. Though his expression hadn’t changed from when he welcomed her, she realized the Duke wasn’t joking.
“Don’t worry too much about what the Emperor said.”
The Duke spoke as if he knew exactly what the Emperor had told her.
“How do you know about that, Father…?”
“If he called you without the Crown Prince knowing, there could only be one reason, don’t you think?”
With an air of knowing everything, the Duke’s words made Retina teary-eyed.
“Your happiness is most important to me. No matter what you desire, I will use all my power to ensure your happiness.”
The Duke ruffled Retina’s hair with his large hand. It was a rough gesture that made her head shake, but it was also the gentlest touch in the world.
With just a few words from him, all the worries that had plagued her since meeting the Emperor seemed to melt away.
Retina felt the love in the large hand that embraced her. She had long thought she was past the age for such indulgence, but to her father, she was still his little youngest daughter.
