Chapter 39:
Throughout his walk down the corridor, Arden recalled the gaze she had directed at him. While she often smiled warmly at others, why did she only show him false smiles? It had become difficult for him to see her genuine laughter lately.
Raymond, who had spotted him, rushed over. It was very odd for him to suddenly glance out the window and then abruptly leave. The knights tried to follow, but they said they couldn’t do anything.
“What rotten luck to run into the Emperor.”
Raymond immediately rushed towards Arden, but he could only watch from afar. He knew the Queen had been preoccupied all day, but he hadn’t expected it to be this serious.
He couldn’t figure out what the problem was anymore. If they wouldn’t speak about what he didn’t know, how could he know? He had to tread carefully, keeping an eye on the situation between the two.
“Raymond.”
The voice that called out softly brimmed with anger.
It was obvious what else had angered the king.
“Yes, Your Highness.”
“What should one do when angry?”
“…Get some rest. You’ll feel better after sleeping.”
“Sleep…”
Arden chuckled dryly. The only time he could sleep was when Leticia was there to help.
Just don’t sleep. Since when had he been so fixated on sleeping?
“It sounds like you’re asking me to request the Queen to put you to bed.”
“What’s wrong with a husband and wife taking care of each other?”
“Husband and wife… Can we even call ourselves that?”
“Well, we’re not exactly not.”
Raymond scratched his chin awkwardly and chuckled.
“We shouldn’t have gotten married in the first place.”
“You said you needed me by your side.”
“…Did I say that?”
Arden raised an eyebrow and smirked slightly. He looked tired, but he didn’t stop walking. He seemed to be fleeing from something.
His long fingers brushed through his golden hair. Raymond stared blankly at him for a moment, bewildered by his casual and languid behavior.
“Is he insane?”
He shivered at the realization that he had unconsciously stared at his lord. He was undoubtedly dangerous in various ways.
“You’re acting like a fool. Snap out of it.”
“Yes, yes…”
Arden turned his head and glanced at Raymond. His gaze, falling on the disheveled man with a foolish expression, soon turned charming and captivated him.
Raymond quickly shook his head and shivered, feeling goosebumps rising on his body.
“Please don’t do this to me.”
He knew he was being teased. Despite knowing it, he disliked how he lost his senses. Raymond liked women. No, it was beyond that; he couldn’t live without them. But isn’t it natural for anyone to be captivated by beauty?
“How come you react like that? It’s amusing.”
The tense atmosphere softened. Arden walked to his office with a much-improved mood. Since he had already slept enough, he decided it was time to work.
Thinking of Leticia standing at the brink of the cliff, waiting for him to yield, felt distant. It seemed like he would plummet down below if he let go even for a moment.
He disliked the eyes that seemed devoid of both lingering affection and hope.
“Shell, just a shell…”
If it was such a beautiful shell, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to keep it as a decoration on the shelf. But he didn’t have such a hobby. He wasn’t a pervert who found interest in lifeless things.
He missed the warmth in her eyes and the longing gaze seeking affection. He didn’t want the light to fade from her golden eyes kissed by the sun.
How could he make her eyes sparkle again?
Arden clenched his fist, thinking of Leticia.
He wanted more than just a shell.
His chest rose and fell rapidly. His gaze turned sharp as it soon fell upon Raymond.
“If I begged, would she listen?”
Raymond looked at him blankly again at his remarkably soft tone.
By this point, it might be painful to be sane. How many times had his emotions changed in such a short time?
“Have you ever begged?”
“Begged…”
“If she’s the queen I know, she might pretend to give in if you beg.”
If she was the queen he knew. Although she had changed quite a bit recently, there were still moments when compassion flickered in her gaze towards him. So, there was still hope.
“When you think it’s too late, that’s when it’s the fastest, Your Highness,” Raymond spoke bluntly.
Arden immediately turned his body towards where she was supposed to be and started walking.
But as boldly as he approached the door, Arden couldn’t easily grasp the handle.
Even the maid, still in a daze, stared at the door in front of the bedroom. If only she had pulled it, it would have been over, but strangely, she couldn’t muster the courage. It felt like facing a towering fortress right in front of her.
He chose to hide behind that huge curtain.
His mind was a mess about what to say. Had he ever had a serious conversation with anyone?
Arden recalled the burning golden eyes that looked at him. A sigh escaped him at the thought of her eyes, which seemed like they would soon turn to ash in the intense heat.
What could he say to her now that her gaze, once clearly directed towards him, had changed?
He gradually lost confidence.
Eyes that had no expectations for him seemed to roam around him.
After lingering in front of the door for a while, he cautiously opened it and entered the bedroom. Letitia’s golden eyes, startled by the sudden presence, turned towards him.
Even in the darkness, her shining golden eyes still sparkled like a sweet temptation. Being led by those eyes felt like being led by a bee.
Her cautious gaze, observing his every move, continued. Suddenly, she blinked her eyes a few times as if snapping out of a daze. Surprised by his sudden return, she hesitantly stepped back, bumping her hip against the wall.
“Why?”
As if she was about to ask why he had come, she opened her mouth. Despite the locked voice, Arden approached her and grabbed her cheek.
She widened her eyes as his sudden grip caught her off guard. Tears, which had been on the verge of falling, trickled down his fingers.
Was she crying?
No, she was still crying. Transparent liquid gathered in her eyes and fell with a plop.
Arden chewed on his lip. The hand that had held her cheek weakly dropped down. Letitia, who had slipped from his hand, hurriedly headed towards the bed’s headboard. With her back pressed tightly against it, she crouched to protect herself. Even as she fled to avoid being devoured by the predator, she didn’t show her back.
Her chest heaved heavily.
Disheveled black hair floated over her pale skin. His gaze lingered on the stark contrast. Arden reached out to grab her arm, trying to hold onto the distant her.
Her arm, fragile enough to be caught in his fingers even when caught, was motionless. With nowhere to run, she struggled to hold her ground.
Her efforts to resist were futile as she was pulled by his hand and fell forward onto the bed.
“Ah…!” With a short breath, Letitia lifted her head to look at him.
A smile graced her lips, tinged with confusion. She was glad that each of his actions still had an impact on her.
Despite wavering, crumbling, and trying to deny it, he still lingered in her heart.
Confirming that, Arden felt good.
Her disheveled hair covered her beautiful face. In the faint moonlight filtering through the window, her face shone beautifully.
Even wet with tears, she was still beautiful and lovely.
Even her tears seemed like jewels.
Slowly reaching out, he brushed her hair back, quietly observing the moisture on his fingertips. Eventually, his fingers slipped through her hair. He pinched his thumb and forefinger to feel the remaining sensation in his hand.
Despite his unwanted actions, he was willing. That was how much she was changing him.
“Have you changed your mind?”
He chuckled at Leticia’s trembling voice. He hadn’t changed his mind. If she was asking about not holding her earlier, the answer was simple.
He didn’t want to hold her then.
