I Picked Up My Father Who Left Home 104
“…I thought it was a rat, but it’s the Grand Duke?”
Jeshuan, who had been on high alert due to the sound from the library, recognized Cassian and showed his characteristic indifferent expression.
He was a person whose emotions rarely appeared on his face. He always masked his feelings with indifference and distanced himself from others with a chilly demeanor.
The only exception was Lia.
“And you, Your Highness, are quite surprising.”
Cassian and Jeshuan were equally unfamiliar with libraries.
Cassian did not enjoy reading, and Jeshuan avoided encountering others and therefore refrained from leaving his palace altogether.
Thus, it was exceedingly rare for the two to meet in this place.
“I simply wish to learn something.”
Despite Cassian’s slightly sharp tone, Jeshuan showed no particular reaction.
He was aware that Cassian inherently disliked him. Moreover, due to Lia, Cassian’s feelings toward him were likely even more negative.
Especially after yesterday’s events, he could understand the tension in Cassian’s demeanor.
Even this level of restraint must have required considerable effort on Cassian’s part.
Given his temperament, it wouldn’t have been surprising if Cassian had rushed at him immediately upon seeing him.
Jeshuan’s response caused Cassian’s gaze to lower coldly.
For some reason, Cassian suspected that what Jeshuan was seeking might be related to Lia.
“If you need something, the maids could fetch it for you.”
Cassian’s indifferent voice carried an undertone, as though claws were concealed within it.
Jeshuan noticed the wariness in Cassian’s words and fell silent for a moment.
Indeed, the palace had maids who provided basic services. If Jeshuan requested a specific book, the maid would find and bring it to him.
That had always been the procedure until now.
However, this time was different.
He couldn’t entrust others with what he was seeking.
Not only would it expose his intentions, but Jeshuan himself wasn’t even certain what he was looking for.
So how could he ask a maid for help?
“And what brings Grand Duke here?”
Rather than answering Cassian’s question, Jeshuan returned one of his own.
It was a mutual probing.
“I, too, am searching for something.”
Cassian spoke indifferently, his gaze sharp.
“I understand that the grand duke household possesses books rivaling those of the imperial family.”
“However, there are books exclusive to the imperial family.”
No matter how powerful the grand duke household was, certain limits still applied.
Jeshuan and Cassian stared at each other momentarily, attempting to gauge the other’s intentions.
In the silence, Jeshuan was the first to speak.
“I do not want to lose Lia.”
Jeshuan’s words seemed somewhat out of the blue, but there was a clear intention behind them.
That intention was deeply connected to the current situation.
“Because she’s the one who can suppress your rampages?”
Cassian asked, seemingly probing for a clearer explanation.
“…Initially, yes, that was why I wanted to keep Lia close. Though I didn’t think she could completely suppress my rampages. It’s just… I believed she was the only salvation that could ease my pain, even slightly.”
Cassian remained silent, merely watching Jeshuan after his confession.
‘So that’s how it was.’
It was something Cassian had vaguely suspected. Jeshuan rarely allowed others to stay close. He even distanced himself from his only family, fearing he might harm them with his own hands.
The one exception to that rule was Lia.
Though Jeshuan feigned indifference toward most things, he showed genuine interest in Lia.
As much as Jeshuan knew Cassian, Cassian, too, understood Jeshuan.
Jeshuan wasn’t someone who acted without reason.
Cassian initially thought Jeshuan might have been charmed by his angel baby before knowing Lia’s true identity and abilities.
But after discovering who Lia was and understanding her abilities, the reason became clear.
It made sense, after all.
To Jeshuan, Lia and her powers were like an irresistibly tempting and sweet fruit.
Although Cassian claimed not to care about Jeshuan’s suffering, he had some idea of the extent of that pain.
Cassian himself had once lived through a time similar to Jeshuan’s.
It was the burden borne by those born with strong abilities.
Thus, Cassian could understand Jeshuan’s choices. Had he been in the same position, he might have chosen similarly.
However, that didn’t mean Cassian was willing to sacrifice his angel baby for Jeshuan’s sake.
He could not allow his little angel to share in Jeshuan’s burdens.
“I have no intention of endangering Lia because of me. Although my initial intentions were purely selfish in keeping her by my side, that’s no longer the case. Now, Lia is far too precious to me. I don’t want her to be hurt. I don’t want her to suffer, whether it’s because of me or for any other reason. Lia has become someone I cannot live without. Even if she had no abilities at all…”
Jeshuan spoke with a sincerity and seriousness more genuine than ever before.
Half-hearted schemes would not sway Cassian. Earning his trust required honesty.
Being as sensitive to others’ lies and pretense as he was to his own.
In the past, he had no intention of making a good impression on Cassian or building a good relationship with him. But now, things were different.
Between them was a precious, special person named Lia.
Because of her, it was better to maintain an amicable relationship with Cassian.
Not to simply get closer to Lia or make a good impression, but for Lia herself.
“For someone who says that, you’ve hidden your condition well while keeping my angel baby by your side.”
If Jeshuan truly considered Lia precious, he should have told her about his condition before she realized it herself.
Moreover, he should have maintained some distance from her on his own.
Although he now knew that Lia could suppress his rampages, according to his words, he hadn’t known that before.
Still, Jeshuan didn’t do that.
Until the incident yesterday, he hadn’t said a word to Lia.
“…I thought it would be fine. I wanted to believe it would be fine. She was the only light given to me. I didn’t want to lose that light. I knew it was an excessive desire, but it was the first desire in my life that I didn’t want to give up.”
As Cassian suspected, it wasn’t that Jeshuan had said absolutely nothing to Lia.
He couldn’t reveal his secret, but he had at least told her that he had one.
And he had also made it clear that the secret was not something trivial.
Even so, Lia had said she would stay by his side.
It might sound like a foolish excuse or a clumsy attempt at self-justification, but because she said that, he thought it would be fine.
Even if he continued to keep his secret and hide it.
But that was a matter between him and Lia.
There was no reason for Cassian to take that into consideration.
“…..……”
Cassian said nothing. The emotions in Jeshuan’s words, which he uttered with an air of resignation, were entirely laid bare.
His desperation, stronger than anything else, was imbued with a deep plea.
Please don’t take Lia away from me.
Lia is everything to me.
While Cassian found Jeshuan’s actions infuriating, he didn’t intend to deny his feelings.
Jeshuan’s sincerity was too palpable for that.
“…When did you find out?”
After a brief silence, Cassian asked in his characteristic cool yet indifferent tone.
He had a general idea of when Jeshuan might have discovered Lia’s abilities.
However, he only heard that Lia had met Jeshuan and didn’t get any detailed context.
That’s why he wanted to know properly.
To be cautious in the future.
“…From the very beginning, I knew.”
“You must have been struggling with your energy back then too.”
There had to be a significant event beyond just meeting for Jeshuan to recognize Lia’s abilities.
Lia’s abilities weren’t something that was outwardly apparent.
“…Yes, I was, but somehow, when I held Lia’s hand, it got better.”
At the mention of holding Lia’s hand, a grinding sound escaped from Cassian’s mouth. Jeshuan flinched but did not stop speaking.
“Are you saying you were convinced of Lia’s abilities from that one incident?”
Cassian scrutinized Jeshuan’s reaction sharply.
Lia’s abilities were something Cassian had never encountered before. He hadn’t even known such abilities existed in someone.
So hearing that Jeshuan recognized Lia’s abilities from a single experience made Cassian suspicious.
He wondered if Jeshuan also knew about Lia’s true identity.
Or if, through some means, Jeshuan had learned about the existence of Saints and was convinced because of that.
“That’s not it. The same thing happened when we met again later. And honestly… my request to my father was a hopeful gamble. If Lia stayed by my side, I could confirm for sure. Whether what I felt then was a mistake or not. So if she truly had the abilities I suspected… I planned to keep her close going forward.”
Cassian assessed whether Jeshuan’s words were sincere or deceptive. Fortunately, his words were truthful.
“So, Your Highness, what do you intend to do now?”
That was the crux of the matter.
Jeshuan had discovered Lia’s abilities. What had already happened couldn’t be undone.
Thus, what mattered was not the past but the present.
And the future.
