I Lost My Memory, so I Decided to Rely on My Brother, Who Seemed to Be the Most Trustworthy in My Family

Chapter 27 – A New Secret

 

Several days after having tea together, Julian invited her to join him horseback riding.

 

Though startled, her curiosity outweighed it. Julian made the quick decision to take her out. Since losing her memory, this was the first time she had ridden a horse. Has she ridden before?

 

Bianca was saddled up by Julian, and the two of them spent some time riding along the coast. When she mounted, she shuddered at the height of the horse, but soon became accustomed to it. The ride along the foreshore was refreshing and very enjoyable. Beyond the stretch of sand, a white villa on a cliff came into view. The scent of the sea was carried by the breeze.

 

“Have I ridden with you before like this, Brother Julian?”

 

“No, this is the first time. You and your older brother shared a tight bond when you were a little child. Your engagement was also set in stone just before you enrolled at the academy. I doubt you had the leisure to be that carefree.”

 

“I suppose that’s true, but I was fat, wasn’t I? For us to ride together like this would have been out of the question.”

 

Julian gave Bianca a bitter smile as she laughed. She could tell by the dress she was wearing before, she was extremely overweight.

 

Bianca got off the horse and took pleasure in collecting some lovely seashells.

 

“You used to get thrilled about collecting shells here to make necklaces when you were a kid.”

 

Bianca was told of this by Julian, who was grinning at her.

 

What? So I was spoiled by my two older brothers…*

 

Bianca was demoralised by that. From the very beginning, she never needed to tense up.

 

Unlike her older brother, who was constantly on edge, Julian seemed relaxed. In addition, he had a knack for bringing enjoyment to people. Perhaps that was why their mother was so fond of him. Without a doubt, this house needed someone like him to put everyone at ease. No wonder Bianca used to be so close to him.

 

Without her second elder brother, the occasional family dinner table would have been a cold, silent one. The conversation was always carried on in minute detail by her mother and Julian. He was fulfilling his role in a shattered family.

 

Bianca was invited to join Julian and his equestrian club pals for a lengthy ride afterward, but their mother Irene protested.

 

“Oh no, a horse is too risky for you to handle on your own. Just forget about it.”

 

Her mother reprimanded her in an unusually severe manner. Though she felt slightly disappointed, her mother was right.

 

Due to the social life at the main house, Bianca’s new playmate, her second older brother, was eventually called back. Apparently, not only was Julian popular with the ladies, but had a lot of friends, both male and female. That left only Bianca and her mother together. Her mother, however, claimed that she had a social life of her own and frequently went out. In reality, Bianca had no one left to take care of her. Even she had to study until tea time in the afternoon.

 

Nevertheless, she certainly had time on her hands.

 

Until now, she was trying to avoid finding out about her past to the utmost. Having learned about the complicated issues surrounding Stuart and Flora, she felt even more strongly about this.

 

Yet now that things had come to this, she questioned if doing that was the correct course of action. Everybody told her that she didn’t have to forcibly recollect her past, but she wasn’t happy with this.

 

Finally, after much hesitation, she decided to go to the hidden room where she had met her eldest brother once. Despite feeling apologetic to Satias, she couldn’t stand it.

 

There was no way he could have been fooling around in that room. Satias was a rational person who did not like to waste his time. He must have had a reason for asking her to keep quiet about it.

 

Under the servant’s watchful eye, she initially tried to enter the office but gave up when she discovered that the door was firmly locked.

 

Having no choice, she proceeded along the hallway, up the stairs, and through the basement’s dim passage. Although she thought that the return trip was somewhat daunting, she decided to set that aside for the time being and headed for the hidden room. Without hesitation, she ascended the stairs and made it to the hidden room safely.

 

Even though the room looked chaotic, Satias was scrupulous. She inspected the room with an emphasis on the tidier areas. Bianca’s heart wrenched at the thought of going against her brother’s wishes, but she was determined to discover the house’s secret in her own way. Otherwise, she might harbor unwarranted doubts.

 

Believing it would be okay and that nothing bad would turn up, she began searching the house. Moving past the dusty bookshelves, she decided to check the white writing desk by the window, which had been on her mind during the past few days. As expected, it was devoid of dust and tidy. The quill and ink were new. Had her brother used it to write?

 

When she pulled the drawer, it slid open. It appeared to be unlocked. She started with the wide drawer in the center but found it vacant. The other drawers were also examined. From the left drawer, an old diary-like object came out then. Whose belongings could it be? Text on the surface was grazed and unreadable. Somehow, she began to feel tense.

 

While knowing that stealing someone’s diary was wrong, she couldn’t help but be intrigued. Since the diary was old, it couldn’t have been her brother’s. In case it was her eldest brother’s diary, she would close it immediately. Deciding to do so, she opened it.

 

Flipping through the pages, she was struck by the graceful writing. The author, who appeared to be male, wrote plainly about his day-to-day activities. It would appear that this person was in charge of the villa. Could he be the family head?

 

His new wife kept popping up here and there. Her name was Lily. Between the lines, it was clear that this man cherished his new wife greatly. Nevertheless, perhaps as a reaction to this, Bianca felt as though she had peeked into someone’s private life, which made her feel unpleasant.

 

Feeling sorry for him, she skimmed over the words a little bit. After flipping to the last page, she found that the page had become blank before she knew it.

 

Did he get bored of writing in his diary? This time, when she slowly flipped the page from back to front, she discovered him writing about his wife getting pregnant and how eagerly he was anticipating the birth of their child. The diary entries ceased after that.

 

Although she did not think it was possible, could this be her father’s diary? It was hard to picture her father as he was now, but was he in fact a very gentle man who had been twisted by various circumstances…

 

No, this place shouldn’t be accessible to her father. Or did her brother bring their father’s diary here? Since her mother’s name was Irene, was Lily the mistress? Bianca was left agonizing over this.

 

In her contemplation, she inadvertently lost sight of time. She suddenly realized that it was getting close to dusk and she started to panic. The servants might discover that she was missing and make a fuss. Before the sun went down, she was in a panicked frenzy to get back to the house with a nonchalant look on her face.

 

In the end, she ended up peeking at someone else’s diary, that of a happily married couple. This fact almost crushed Bianca, who sought to become a nun. She might not be accepted at the monastery anymore.

 

The date the diary was written and who the author was were unknown. Bianca was despondent at her own wishy-washy nature and thought this knowledge might not be necessary. It was not something she was familiar with. Even though she had intended to find out about her own past, before she knew it, she was trying to find out other people’s secrets…

 

After gently putting the diary back in the original drawer of the writing desk, she headed totteringly to the staircase.