I Don't Want To Attack You!

T/N: Sorry for the delay I was really really sick I was intending to update this novel again but I had exams then im sorry but its regular now every monday and only 2 chapters are left they will be in parts but… Also Berti is a woman I really didn’t know it also translated as a priest so i got confused by her gender.

“Heather!”

“Ugh… it’s heavy. Don’t lift me higher!”

Professor Kučeva… Not only the people of our kingdom but also anyone with even a slight interest in magic knows this famous name. Among the employees of our Yevgeny’s wardrobe, his name was infamous for a different reason.

The two, who were each other’s first love, had a passionate courtship, shooting heart-shaped clouds into the sky, but after marriage, they hardly ever left their bedroom. And thus, the fruit of their love was twelve. Yes, twelve.

Despite being a major figure, Professor Kučeva, who had little interest in luxury, happened to have his clothes tailored at our wardrobe, and this led to orders for clothes throughout the four seasons. From Yevgeny’s perspective, he was a golden VIP customer, but the employees who went to deliver the clothes described the place as a den where ten demons roamed. (At that time, they had ten children.)

It was spring eight years ago when orders were pouring in. At that time, as a newcomer, I did more odd jobs than touching fabrics. All the employees were out for deliveries or receiving materials from the harbor, so I had to make deliveries as the only seamstress.

Nowadays, they would probably argue why I should make deliveries when there’s no additional bonus, but eight years ago, I was filled with enthusiasm, willing to chew iron if asked.

’31 Charlotte Street’

I can’t forget the worried look Ben, who was working in accounting back then, gave me. It was a look of a young human’s possessions being dedicated to a demon. Damn… I should have been suspicious of that look back then. It was the boundless passion that made me think I could bell a dragon’s throat.

And I saw hell.

They looked like densely packed cute chicks, but their voices sounded like boiling train boilers, and their strength was overwhelming. Every time they embraced me, my body staggered.

I was not skilled in taking care of them.

“Header! Black clouds appear in the sky when you use bad words because the clouds get hurt.”

“No, it’s not. The collected solar panels absorb sunlight and turn gray.”

“Header, Coco is still not feeling better even though I wrapped a bandage around her… Hng… Help me too.”

Here, Coco is the sixth, Nina, a cat doll they hold.

“You use bandages for wound closure or to prevent bacterial infections. Wrapping a bandage around an internal doll stuffed with cotton won’t make its torn tail grow back.”

I sewed up the cat doll, hoping Nina would let go of my skirt.

For some reason, the children followed me and liked me unusually well. Considering that Kučeva couple had even asked Kučeva couple to let me make deliveries, I can guess how much they had to bribe the Kučeva couple.

As a newcomer without the power to refuse, I was forced to stamp attendance at the mansion as if being dragged to a slaughterhouse. I repeated that act for a whopping four years. As the days went by, I became more and more haggard, and when I reached the peak of emaciation, my body looked like skin and bones. The fear that I would earn money only to spend it on funeral expenses swallowed my patience. I told Yevgeny that I couldn’t do it anymore.

At a time when my sewing skills were improving, Evgeny, who didn’t want to miss out on hiring a skilled employee, tearfully gave up double the cost of the clothes, and he didn’t send me back to that demon’s den.

A little boy with a missing front tooth came running, shaking his silver hair roughly. Even though I was looking at it head-on, I couldn’t avoid it because of the other kids clinging to my body like leeches. Helplessly, I had to take a hit on my right side, which happened to be empty, as the little boy with the missing front tooth swung his wooden sword.

“Ouch!”

While the other kids were wrapping around my body like armor, he aimed for the conveniently empty right side. It seems like they produced an excellent swordmaster in a magician’s house.”

“How do I look? Am I looking fantastic? If there’s a bad guy bothering Heather, I’ll take care of them!”

“Uglick Martin, 39 years old. 181 cm tall. From Sandemande. Manager of Evgeny’s Wardrobe. By the time you become a Swordmaster, his profession may have changed. Remember?”

I felt the throbbing pain in my side, unable to scream because of the kids hanging from both of my arms. The little boy with the missing front tooth, what was his name… Dorian? Mercurio? Ah, it was Leontis, I think.

Leontis stood there with a blank expression and a runny nose throughout my speech. I’d be grateful if he remembered even one word of what I said.

“None again?”

“Does it have to be a human? Your face alone looks like an elephant’s.”

“You can’t harm small animals! It’s bad to harm small animals.”

Leontis yelled, then suddenly thrust the tip of his wooden sword at me. He seemed deeply engrossed in his role as a righteous hero, armed with the few swordsmanship lessons he’d taken.

I became a villain who harms cute little animals. It was when Leontis’s blow struck my side that had already taken a hit once.

“Eutsha!”

The little boy’s body floated in the air. Leontis, surprised, dropped his sword on the marble floor and struggled. But once he confirmed who had lifted him up, Leontis snuggled up to him.

“Brother!”

“Don’t bother your busy sister and come here.”

Because of his tall stature, I had to bend my head far back to see his face. His thick silver hair caught my attention first. He’s really tall. When he’s expressionless, his eyes look fierce, but when he smiles, his eyes form a pretty curve. The sunlight streaming in through the glass window illuminated his jawline and straight nose bridge. The oppressive atmosphere around me seemed to brighten with his appearance.

If Asher exuded a pure and graceful aura to the extent that no one dared to touch her, the man before me seemed like a lawless wanderer who had traversed rough deserts.

Thanks to Asher, I had developed an immunity to handsome men, so I didn’t lose my wits when I saw ‘Leisender,’ whom I hadn’t seen in a long time.

Leisender plucked the kids clinging to me one by one as if catching fish and brought them over to my side. Even if they were children under ten, their weight wouldn’t be light, so I secretly admired him as he effortlessly carried them with one arm.

His bicep muscles were no joke. Moreover, Leisender, who couldn’t stand tight things to the extreme, had already undone three buttons. It seemed like he had dressed up in his own way for his return to the mansion after a long time, but he couldn’t bear to button up all the way to the neck. The chest muscles visible through the unbuttoned buttons looked as solid as a rock. I wondered who was bigger between him and Asher.

“Brother! Masha said she’s coming for dinner?”

Leisender, after hugging Nina with one arm, playfully blew a raspberry on her cheek. When a silly sound came out, Nina burst into a kitten-like laugh and hugged Leisender’s neck. They were good siblings then and now. Despite having such a fierce appearance and a sturdy body, there was a reason why those little birds followed him around like that.

His affectionate smile fell directly on my face. Leisender raised one eyebrow and then broke into a deep dimple-filled smile. Then he stretched out his remaining arm and beckoned me.

“Come on, you too.”

His cheerful tone hadn’t changed since four years ago. He suddenly burst into a big laugh when I seemed to be contorting my face as if chewing on something. It was a genuinely enjoyable laugh that could make anyone feel better. If it had been four years ago, I might have just ignored it and walked past, but after not seeing each other for four years, it was only human to exchange a word or two.

“I don’t want to. You smell like sweat.”

“Is that so?”

Leisender pressed his nose against his own arm and sniffed. But whether my words felt like a provocation or not, the other kids started glaring at me and began to protest vigorously.

“Our brother smells nice, you know? Header, don’t say bad things without knowing anything!”

“Yeah, yeah!”

“Brother went to so much trouble to come home today, and if Header says that, gulp, Brother might get hurt! Mysterious clouds, why are they black?, Header doesn’t even know!”

“This is not a unit of volume; it’s a unit of distance.”

I have learned the hard way from the experiences of the past four years. The moment I start giving in to the children’s tantrums, I become like an insect trapped in an inescapable trap of hell.

Leontis glared at me with teary eyes. I lightly tapped his small head with my fingertip and passed by Leisender.

“Uh, uh. Wait, already?”

Leisender put down Nina in a hurry and blocked my path. His chest covered my entire field of vision. To see Leisender’s face, I had to take a step back.

“I just came to make a delivery.”

“You didn’t know I was coming back?”

We hadn’t exchanged a single letter in four years. I only found out much later that Leisender had gone to study abroad in another country after accidentally overhearing the employees talking about it. But what could I say about his return? It was a question with no answer.

“I’m busy.”

“I know, you’ve always been busy. Even when I begged you to schedule a date and come back to the wardrobe, you always found time. I thought you were hiding a handsome husband or something.”

“What? When did you ask me out on a date?”

For a full four years, I had my vitality drained by these little rascals. This place was a battlefield where screams and (my) cries filled the air. There was no room here for tender and shy words like “date.” Moreover, Leisender had never officially asked me out on a date.

Leisender looked just as bewildered as I was.

“I’ve told you several times to make time for me.”

Ah… I distinctly remember saying those words. But back then, as well as now, those words didn’t feel like a date request.

“….Take care of my siblings a little more,” he said.

“No.”

“You won’t?”

“No, I won’t.”

“….”

An uncomfortable silence fell between us. Breaking through the tension, someone let out a deep cough. Leisender’s servants were waiting, holding his luggage in both hands, ready for his orders. Among them, the one who appeared to be the highest-ranking servant addressed Leisender with a careful tone.

“Young master, should we tidy up your belongings?”

Leisender didn’t take his eyes off me and made a casual gesture. The servants carried his luggage upstairs to the mansion’s second floor. Leisender took a step closer to me without looking away. I felt his shadow covering my entire body. He had the same displeased expression as four years ago. He put one hand in his pocket, and his posture didn’t differ from four years ago.

“Heather.”

“….”

“What did you think of me? Why did you misunderstand my words like that?”

“I thought you were the kind of person who would say something like that.”

“Sigh…!”

Leisender chuckled. Well, I can’t blame him for this little misunderstanding. Every time he visited the mansion, he’d ask for some time, and I’d secretly curse him. But to think that it was a date request… The only relief was that he was the eldest son of the Kuchevar couple, representing our kingdom, so I didn’t actually curse him, which made me feel less guilty.

“If I misunderstood, I apologize.”

“No need to apologize.”

“Then, see you later.”

About 5000 years from now. The misunderstanding from four years ago had been cleared up, and although it wasn’t a long conversation, we had exchanged a few words, so this level of greeting was sufficient. Besides, I was still on duty. Mr. Martun had his eyes narrowed, watching for any opportunity to pick on me, and I couldn’t afford to make any trouble. If I arrived even a little late, he would surely scold me for dawdling outside.

“Are you leaving already?”

“Yes.”

“Then today, for me, could you make some time…”

“I can’t. If I dawdle any longer, I feel like I’ll get a stabbed.”

Leaving Leisender behind, I sprinted to the sewing room under the scorching sun. To be honest, I was glad to see Leisender again after four years, but if you ask me if I was willing to endure Martin’s nagging for that, the answer was clearly no. After all, he had left for a foreign country without saying a word to me in the first place.

I sprinted up the stairs of the sewing room, two steps at a time, and opened the door. But before I could catch my breath, my head spun around.

“What are you doing right now?”

Reika trembled with my bag in her hand. When I approached quickly, Reika, trying to conceal her surprise, boldly handed me the bag.

“Do you have jewels hidden in here? Why are you making a fuss?”

“It’s not jewels; it’s leftover bread from breakfast. Even if there’s a crumb left, don’t touch my stuff. Got it?”

“What? Are you treating me like a germ or something!”

Reika shouted back. The sound of glass shattering, like a crack, echoed through the sewing room, abruptly interrupting the rhythmic sound of sewing machines. Everyone’s attention was now focused on us. Reika and I created a tense atmosphere, as if we were about to start a fierce fight with sharp fangs at the slightest misspoken word. The other seamstresses were well aware of this precarious situation.

“Better to be a germ; you can just call a doctor then. Have you already forgotten what happened every time you touched my things? Overnight, my commissioned pieces disappeared, milk was spilled in my bag, and the final dress for the opera’s dress rehearsal was torn to shreds!”

“Are you saying I did all of that just now?”

Reika shouted with a flushed face. Then she pointed to the young seamstresses around her one by one.

“Among these kids here, did anyone see me rummaging through that bag?”

The young seamstresses, crushed by Reika’s intimidating demeanor, couldn’t say a word. Since no one claimed to have seen it, Reika became even more confident and raised her chin.

“I was just trying to sweep the floor. But your broom-like bag rolled under the table and got in the way, so I picked it up!”

“You were cleaning the floor?”

Even when she was a rookie, she never touched cleaning duties. What had come over her now that she was suddenly cleaning? Strangely, Reika held a broom in her hand, and there was a pile of gathered threads that indicated she had been sweeping.

Just then, the sewing room door creaked open.

“What’s all this noise?!”

“Mr. Martin!”

Martin’s arrival only heightened the tension in the room. Mr. Martin looked at me and Reika before his face twisted into a scowl, seemingly after assessing the situation.

“Heather Geline!”

He called my name with a fierce tone. As soon as Reika saw him, she covered her mouth and rushed out of the sewing room. It all happened before the bewildered Martin could grab her. Suppressing his anger, Martin approached me with long strides.

“No excuse will work.”

He spoke sharply, as if he could pierce me with his words, and then followed after Reika. Quite the romantic, that guy. Their threats only annoyed me and didn’t evoke any fear. What genuinely frightened me was the condition of my bag that Reika had been touching. I hurriedly unbuttoned it and opened it up. My sewing kit, a pencil, my wallet, and even my notebook, everything was still there.

Oh, the design competition entry form.

I suddenly remembered the entry form that I had placed inside the notebook. An uneasy feeling ran down my spine. I quickly retrieved the notebook and flipped through it. Thankfully, the entry form was safe.

‘Phew… This could have ended badly.’

I slumped back in my chair, leaving the sweat rolling down my temples unattended.

“Stop worrying about me and get back to work.”

Before long, the sound of sewing machines once again filled the room, calming my racing heart.

* * *

“That’s a really big deal. I can’t believe you’ve been putting up with this all along.”

“Really? Is it that big of a deal?”

Asher grabbed Berti’s wrist and forcefully helped him to his feet. Berti stumbled to stand up, unable to resist his strength.

“Go to Yevgeny’s dressing room right now and ask for repairs.”

Berti carefully placed a small gold embellishment that had fallen off her sleeve onto her palm. It was a tiny gold ornament that exhibited a faint presence even on her white gloves. It was so small that you had to squint to see its shape clearly.

“Do you repair something like this?”

Berti tilted her head in confusion. It was just a minor scratch that didn’t deviate from the original design. However, Asher exaggeratedly complained as if they had encountered a disaster.

“Even though this should be a perfect priestly garment, how can it look like this?”

“Am I… insensitive?”

“No, that won’t do. Let’s go to the dressing room together after the afternoon prayers.”

Asher made the decision without even listening to Berti’s response. Berti might have followed him without complaint if Asher had said, “It’s a hot day; shall we go for a walk together?” But…

‘I won’t refuse to go with him now, but…’

Still, the reason felt strange. Asher himself had torn his priestly garment to shreds but had perfectly attended the prayer meeting the next day. Why was he making such a fuss only about Berti’s clothes?

‘Oh, could it be…?’

Does he like me? The absurd idea started to pollute Berti’s mind. Even if she shook her head and told herself that it was ridiculous, she couldn’t easily dismiss it. In reality, the seamstress, Heather, was just a smokescreen, and Asher’s real target was me all along. From the beginning, it seemed suspicious that he praised a woman who was only slightly pretty like this. Maybe it was all part of Asher’s plan to seduce Berti.

‘Why am I…’

Berti was someone who couldn’t feel any romantic feelings towards a man with the same job as her. However, for some reason, she didn’t feel a strong aversion towards Asher. Instead, an inexplicable attraction and satisfaction spread within him. It felt like the best hormones, beyond what anything else could satisfy, were melting his brain.

‘But still, let’s be cautious… Before something really big happens.’

Berti couldn’t concentrate on the evening prayers due to her useless concerns.

Asher skipped dinner and came to find Berti. At Asher’s silent urging, Berti finally put down her spoon and had to get into the carriage. The setting sun bathed the square in red hues. As the two priests stepped out of the carriage, long shadows stretched behind them. The square was bustling with crowds, and many of them recognized Asher. Before the surroundings got noisy, they quickly moved to a quieter alley.

“Why do we have to sneak around like this when we haven’t even committed a sin?”

Wiping the sweat dripping down her chin, Berti spoke. Asher didn’t have the presence of mind to respond to Berti’s words. Just the thought of meeting Heather made her stomach churn. She didn’t know why. It was just a feeling of her heart writhing, making it hard to breathe.

“Yevgeny’s dressing room is over there. I’ve been here once before, so I know where the sewing room is.”

Even though Berti was talking loudly, Asher had been silent all along. For him, the only thought that occupied his mind was the upcoming encounter with Heather. He didn’t know the reason. It was just a feeling of his heart twisting painfully, making it difficult to breathe.

“Yevgeny’s dressing room is over there. I’ve been here once before, so I know where the sewing room is.”

Even though Berti was talking loudly, Asher had been silent all along. For him, the only thought that occupied his mind was the upcoming encounter with Heather.

“Why did you come here? I mean, why did you specifically choose to come here, my lord?”

“Why? It’s because I’m responsible for signing on behalf of the temple. We can’t send a steward for this, and the other priests were too busy, so I came in their place.”

Asher brushed his hair with an expression of genuine regret.

“Next time, if you have such an opportunity, please consult with me.”

“…I understand.”

In reality, it was an utterly unnecessary errand. Who in their right mind would assign such a trivial task to Asher? Berti attributed Asher’s near-anger and disappointment to a reason other than Heather. He thought that it might be because he hadn’t noticed her suffering in this scorching heat. Berti’s face flushed with embarrassment.

“Ugh, what should I do…”

But there was no time to ponder for long. Asher, the priest, held onto Berti’s wrist and hurriedly led her to Yevgeny’s dressing room. Berti noticed the long fingers enclosed in pristine white gloves. They were worth more than any jewel and incredibly beautiful.

‘Does this hand truly desire me…?’

The tormented thoughts of a deeply troubled man continued endlessly.

* * *

“Look at me straight in the eye and tell me. You really didn’t do that?”

The two priests arrived in front of the sewing room on the third floor but hesitated to enter. It was just as Berti was about to greet them loudly. Asher urgently covered Berti’s mouth. Between the open door, Heather could be seen standing, shedding tears. Her expression was as cold as a sharpened blade, yet her swollen eyes and slightly puffed lips were transparently revealing her profound emotions.

Asher couldn’t take his eyes off Heather’s face. He stared blankly as thick teardrops left long streaks while falling. Although he knew nothing about what had happened to her, seeing her cry so bitterly made it evident that Heather was entirely innocent.

With Asher pressing against him, Reika, the short-haired seamstress, put Heather’s hair behind her ears. Her gestures and her breathing were filled with anger, almost as strong as Heather’s.

“You’re delusional if you think I’d steal your design by cutting your hair, aren’t you?”

“Then how could you draw it exactly the same as mine as if you’d stamped it on?”

“That was originally my design! Where’s the proof that you were first?”

Without even wiping away her flowing tears, Heather searched through her bag. Then, she took out a black leather notebook and handed it over.

“You peeked at it.”

Reika burst into a mocking laugh, saying, “Ha!” It was as if she found the whole thing amusing.

“Someone, please take her to see a doctor. Delusions like this need hospitalization or something.”

Heather closed her eyes as if suppressing her building anger. Tears welled up and her chest swelled, then subsided. She struggled to control her rising breath before speaking. It was evident that she was trying hard not to appear weak in front of Reika.

“When I went to submit the entry form, she called me shameless and stupid, saying that it’s pathetic for someone like me to aspire to be a designer.”

“…”

“She said she regretted posting the designer announcement because of me, that I copied your designs, even every single line!”

Heather’s emotions were intensifying. Reika couldn’t bring herself to look Heather directly in the eyes, casting her gaze into the empty air.

“Do I have to endure your insults?”

“Then, what?! Are you saying I plagiarized your work?!”

Reika knew that stepping back at this point would be an acknowledgment of Heather’s words, so she raised her voice and confronted her even more strongly. On the other hand, Heather was mentally exhausted. The indiscriminate insults at Yevgeny’s dressing room, the copied designs, and now Reika —all of it felt like the ground beneath her feet had collapsed. She was falling into an inescapable abyss.

It felt as if an iron anchor was embedded in her heart. Blood flowed freely, but the wound was too deep to heal.

“Even if you drew my design, I don’t know if you can make it with your clumsy hands.”

Heather firmly scolded with a voice devoid of warmth and left the sewing room. She used a handkerchief she had in her pocket to roughly wipe away her tears and tossed it onto the floor.

Heather walked past Asher, who was right next to her, without noticing him. Everything was dark in front of her, and her mind was blank. Even though Heather had left, the sewing room felt quiet, like the aftermath of a storm.

Asher picked up the handkerchief that Heather had thrown away.

“Wow… What’s going on? I can’t even ask for alterations to clothing…, are you crying?!”

Asher quietly shed tears without making a sound. His large pupils shimmered with a watery curtain.

“…Please return.”

Asher muttered a word with a melancholic tone. Berti wanted to question him about why he had come here when he had no intention of getting his clothes altered. Soon, she realized that the purpose was not to alter the priest’s robes but to see Heather.

All of Asher’s absurd excuses were just to meet Heather. Without realizing it, she had been trapped in the delusion that he liked her. It was a relief that he had realized it before he went somewhere and foolishly made a scene. Berti followed Asher, gently patting her chilled heart.

* * *