037. What I Truly Want (1)

As expected, this topic had come up.

“If the two of you are dating, there’s no harm in it, right? It benefits the family as well. If what you said about ‘becoming the head of the family isn’t the only way to help the family’ aligns in this direction, I’ll acknowledge it. It’s a valid point.”

Lucia hadn’t expected it to be due to Louis.

She gazed at Louis silently. The boy, who shared her red hair but had brown eyes unlike hers, still looked youthful. He was only nineteen, still a year away from adulthood.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

As she stared at him without saying a word, Louis frowned deeply.

Lucia chuckled at his reaction.

“Just because.”

Her younger half-brother seemed anxious. He must have been worried about the direct lineage.

Concerned that their father might entertain other thoughts because he didn’t inherit the red eyes.

“You’re still young.”

“What nonsense are you spouting?”

Louis’s brows furrowed further. His inability to hide his expressions was quite childish.

“Louis.”

Lucia smiled—a bright, radiant smile. It was the expression she was best at.

It was also the expression her half-brother hated the most.

“What you’re worried about won’t happen, so don’t be hasty. You might get hurt.”

“Don’t lecture me.”

“Lecture? I’m just giving you advice as your sister, just as I did last time.”

Lucia responded lightly and stood up. Her gaze shifted back to Duke Edelte.

“I understand your intentions, Father. But I think it’s still too soon. We haven’t been seeing each other for long, and to proceed directly to marriage is premature.”

Lucia rejected the Duke’s proposal. Such progress was too sudden.

Even from her perspective, it was too quick; it would be even more so from Owen’s standpoint.

“That’s the life of nobles. Even love marriages are rare in this world.”

“Of course. I am well aware of that. But, Father, we’re talking about Duke Verdun here.”

Despite her refusal, the Duke remained steadfast. Lucia, knowing this would be his reaction, responded with a smile.

“He is not like ordinary nobles. I believe you understand this well, too.”

“…”

The Duke was silent.

Lucia took this as a sign of agreement.

“If he doesn’t want it, he won’t even consider engagement, let alone marriage. If he hears about the need for an heir, he’d likely choose a relative as his successor.”

Those who knew Owen were well aware of this. Owen had no interest in romance, engagements, or marriage. As the head of his family, he was expected to bring in a spouse at least for the sake of an heir, but he showed no interest in that either.

Even when the retainers of the Verdun family expressed their concerns, he remained resolute. Rumors about this had already spread widely in both social and political circles. It had become a joke that the Verdun family might end with this generation.

Of course, no one seriously believed that the Verdun family would become extinct. They had too much to lose in the empire. If Owen didn’t have a direct heir, a relative with the proper lineage would take over. While it was rare to find someone with both black hair and black eyes in the collateral lines, there were a few who had inherited at least one of these traits.

“So, please wait. Until he brings up the topic himself.”

Lucia’s argument was logical. The Duke, too, seemed to find it reasonable and nodded.

“…Alright. Do that.”

The only one dissatisfied was Louis. Eager to erase the “Edelte” name from Lucia as soon as possible, he bit his lower lip.

“Thank you.”

Lucia bowed to the Duke in gratitude and then turned to look at Louis. The sight of her anxious half-brother, biting his lip, seemed pitiful. He resembled a vulnerable animal.

“Have a good talk with Father.”

Looking down at the seated Louis, Lucia smiled sweetly. Unlike her beautifully curved lips, her eyes, arched as if drawn, were cold. The red eyes within them were dark and icy.

“You must have a lot to talk about.”

In front of the Duke, she hinted that ‘what you’re thinking will not happen.’ He must have realized it, too—why Louis brought this up to him and what drove the boy to such a conclusion.

“….”

Louis’s fierce gaze was directed at her. Despite his intense brown eyes, they didn’t frighten her at all.

Lucia deepened her smile and informed the Duke that she was leaving.

“I’ll take my leave now. See you at dinner.”

“Yes. You may go.”

The Duke didn’t stop her. Instead, his gaze shifted to Louis. His cold, emotionless eyes held nothing but reproach.

How pathetic he must seem.

Even if he did nothing, the Duke would have naturally handed over the position to him eventually.

Louis had been unnecessarily frightened and anxious, showing a lack of trust in his father. He would undoubtedly be scolded for that.

Satisfied with this thought, Lucia chuckled quietly as she turned away. It was amusing how they were both aiming for the same goal, but still had conflicts and misunderstandings. It was so obvious, yet they couldn’t see it.

The Duke loved his current wife and cared for his son just as much. Would he really not pass down the head position to such a beloved son? Unless he had no direct lineage at all, which wasn’t the case, as he had half the lineage.

If Lucia herself had ambitions for the head position, things might have been different, but she had no such desires.

‘I don’t need anything with the Edelte name.’

She didn’t have much affection for anything related to Edelte. It was the place that birthed and sustained her, but that was all. It wasn’t beautiful enough to become attached to or love.

The only beautiful thing in Edelte was the mansion in the capital. Although, people bearing the Edelte name were outwardly attractive due to their lineage.

Even the Duke’s wife, who had a different lineage from Edelte, and Lucia’s mother were not lacking in beauty.

They were like flowers without fragrance—appealing on the outside but rotten within.

Lucia herself was no different, so she couldn’t complain much. She shared the same blood and was raised under such people, so she had learned only that.

‘…If I am to marry, it should be Owen, after all.’

Although she refused her father’s proposal, the path she had to take remained unchanged.

She once had a fiancé from the Marquisate of Selyd, an heir from a prestigious family. He was quite reputable and handsome enough to be among the most attractive in the social circles.

She hadn’t opposed the idea of marriage with him, but the young marquis had the worst mindset.

– What are you doing?

– I was punishing the maid who spilled tea on your dress.

He was a madman.

Pouring hot tea on a person just because she spilled tea was not the thinking of a sane human being.

While Lucia wasn’t exactly a person with a kind disposition, she never struck or inflicted violence on others.

After that incident, she broke off the engagement with the young marquis. That was exactly three years ago.

‘And not long after, I met Owen.’

Though she hadn’t had any particular feelings for her former fiancé, she hadn’t expected him to be such trash, which left a bad taste in her mouth.

Because of that scum, she had a maid who made a mistake suffer burns, and the maid was severely injured. If she hadn’t called a physician immediately, the maid would have been left with a significant scar.

‘…Maybe that’s why Owen seemed more perfect.’

Was it because he stood in stark contrast to the young marquis of Selyd? Owen seemed like an impeccably flawless person.

That remains the case even now.

‘It would be the same no matter who I compare him to.’

She had never seen anyone more beautiful than Owen. Moreover, he took good care of his people despite being indifferent to others. Unlike some, he didn’t resort to violence or betray trust in relationships.

Though he had ignored and avoided her for three years, he had maintained a minimum level of courtesy. It was a bit surprising when she heard he burned her letters and discarded her gifts… but that wasn’t the case from the start, so she couldn’t blame him.

For the first two years, he continuously rejected her and returned the gifts in their original state. He probably thought that by burning her letters and gifts, she would be disappointed and give up.

– I don’t understand why the Lady keeps following me.

Once, tired of her persistence, he sighed and asked.

– Why do you follow me?

He was genuinely curious. He wanted to know what part of him she liked, why she didn’t give up even when he refused.

At that time, she had replied:

– Because Your Grace is handsome.

– …

– And kind. Even though I keep following you, you’ve never said a harsh word.

– Lady, in society, that’s called basic manners, not kindness.

Owen had looked at her with disbelief.

Then he sighed again, turned his back, and left.

But Lucia was sincere. Most people would curse even to themselves if someone persistently followed them. Most would show signs of irritation or anger at the slightest inconvenience.

Even her family did. Whenever she spoke to them, they would either avoid eye contact, look annoyed, or get angry.

Owen didn’t do that.

While he wasn’t what most people would call “kind,” it was enough for her.

She believed that if she persistently followed him and tried hard, he would eventually become hers.

‘And in the end, he came close to that.’

Although he avoided and ignored her for three years, their relationship had changed in the end.

Wasn’t that enough?

‘But it’s still a concern.’

Lucia exhaled shortly as she walked to her bedroom. She stopped abruptly in the hallway, ignoring the occasional glances from the passing servants.

‘Giving someone certainty about feelings is this difficult.’

She had never thought it hard to win someone’s favor. Most became hers with a smile and kind treatment. A few months were usually enough.

Owen was truly difficult.

Knowing the other person liked her but still being unable to receive a confession was frustrating.

“…”

Her head grew cluttered with thoughts again.

Lucia turned around, deciding on the next course of action. She only knew limited ways to achieve her goal: make expressions the other liked, do things to entice him, and give gifts.

She decided to do what she could at that moment.

“Make a bouquet of red roses.”

Lucia went to the garden and found the gardener, promptly making her request.

“It’s for Duke Verdun. I think ten flowers will be good.”

“Understood, Lady.”

The gardener, familiar with the request, bowed politely.

After giving her instructions, Lucia headed to her bedroom and called for Marie.

“Marie.”

Marie, who had returned to the bedroom before her, was busy working. As her personal maid, Marie mainly did tasks assigned by Lucia, one of which was sorting invitations and letters every day.

As a prominent figure in society, Lucia received dozens of invitations and letters. Sorting through them alone was nearly impossible, so Marie handled the bulk of the categorizing.

As expected, she was diligently sorting invitations today as well.

“You’re sorting the invitations. I’ll take over that. Please go to the storage and fetch the gift for His Grace.”

“What should I bring?”

“A tie pin. The one I bought last month.”