For Your Failed Unrequited Love

I haven’t forgotten this year.

Felix searched the drawer, feeling the tip of his itchy nose. A round medicine bottle was caught in his fingertips. There was a golden pill inside.

When he took one out and swallowed it, the effect was immediate. Itching and sneezing symptoms that kept bothering him disappeared.

Lucy’s allergy medicine has progressed, and now he doesn’t show any symptoms just by taking it.

Feeling relieved thanks to the disappearance of the itch, Felix turned and looked at the scenery outside the window.

Along with the allergy symptoms that came like a ghost, the scenery of the duchy was also changing to autumn. The weather was getting cooler, and the trees were showing off their last green of the year.

From inside the office, he observed Lucy leaving the garden as he peered out the window. She had a basket on the side with unidentified fruits in it.

She spent almost all of her time in the garden. Why is she returning so early on this day?

Looking down at the top of Lucy’s head as she approached the mansion, Felix covered the documents he had been reading. He got up from his chair and left the workplace.

He descended to the first floor and noticed the twins leaving the study. The kids were given hugs by Lucy, who was standing in front of the door.

In front of her mother, Knox flapped a piece of paper while appearing to be pleased about something. It was probably a test paper.

“Mom, mom! Look! I got it all right!”

As he said, Knox’s test paper was filled with circles, which means he got the correct answers. Watching the scene from behind, the family tutor added a word.

“Knox is getting a perfect score on the test all the time.”

“Wow, that’s amazing”

To Lucy’s praise, Knox shrugged his shoulders with a proud look.

A few steps behind her, Eston stood. The child was staring at the floor while listening to his brother’s brag.

“Eston.”

Lucy, who noticed the figure, called the child. Eston raised his head with sullen eyes. Lucy didn’t ask but he said;

“I did not get a perfect score. I got a few wrong.”

“Did you?”

Lucy took the test paper that the child was holding and opened it. An X was drawn to indicate that some answers were wrong.

“It’s all right, Eston. This is also a high score.”

As the child’s expression did not improve even with comfort, Lucy jokingly whispered something into Eston’s ear. The child twitched his mouth as if his ears were itchy and eventually burst into laughter.

The timid child quickly regained his energy.

“Eston. Knox.”

When Felix approached and called, the twins ran to him and held them in his arms. He spoke to his sons in secret.

“I came out because dad didn’t want to work.”

“Actually, I don’t want to study either.”

Eston whispered in secret.

“Can’t we go out and play?”

Knox also helped.

“Shall we?”

Felix’s response immediately excited the kids. Holding the children’s hands, he walked to Lucy.

“Should we head out for a walk today, the four of us?”

The twins behind Felix looked anxiously toward their mother as they awaited her response.

After agonizing for a while, Lucy finally answered.

“Okay. To be honest, I didn’t want to work today.”

She held the child’s hand while putting the basket she was carrying on the hallway floor roughly.

So, two adults who didn’t want to work and two kids who didn’t want to study left the mansion together.

  *** 

“The fact that they take that after you is a relief.”

Felix said as he watched the children playing in the garden. When Lucy raised her head to see what he meant, he shook a medicine bottle that he had pulled from his pocket.

“Allergies. If they were anything like me, they would have struggled every fall.”

Strangely, the twins, who resemble Felix in all ways, including appearance and personality, did not inherit his allergies.

Felix was always appreciative of the fact that the kids could run around and play outside whenever they wanted, even in the fall.

“The health of the children is the most important thing.”

“That’s right.”

Coincidentally, as soon as the conversation was over, Knox coughed.

“He’s been coughing for a while now. Did he catch a cold?”

Lucy eventually called Knox, whose cheeks were also red when she saw it up close, and she touched the child’s forehead.

“You’ve got a little fever”

“I’m not sick.”

For fear of being told to stop playing and go back, Knox spoke quickly.

“Doesn’t your head hurt? What if your fever gets worse?”

The child shook his head at the mother’s question. Still, Lucy looked at the child’s forehead again as she was worried. She couldn’t tell if it really didn’t hurt or if he’s pretending not to be sick because he didn’t want to go back.

“Then let’s go to the greenhouse.”

Felix suggested. It was always warm in the greenhouse. Knox, who had a slight cold, would be fine there.

“Let’s look at the flowers together and then go back.”

“Good!”

Lucy and the children agreed.

The gloomy sky started to rain as they made their way to the greenhouse inside the garden.

Lucy quickly removed her jacket and covered Knox’s head, who had a hint of a cold.

The four-person family entered the greenhouse right away to get out of the rain. Since the greenhouse was set at a certain temperature even though it was raining outside, it felt warm inside.

“I should make tea.”

Felix said as he hung the kettle on the stove.

After some time, as the water heated up, Lucy gave Knox the warm tea first. The child’s constant coughing bothered Lucy, so she pulled the covered outer garment up to the child’s neck.

“There must be a blanket here.”

Felix stood up from his chair and moved over to a corner of the greenhouse where there was a drawer. He pulled open the drawer to find the blankets and other items he needed when all of a sudden he felt movement behind him.

He turned around and saw Eston standing.

“Why? Do you need anything?”

When Felix asked, Eston shook his head. The child wandered around Felix and opened and closed the drawer for no reason.

“Daddy.”

After a while, the child who stopped closing the drawer called him quietly.

“I guess my mom likes Knox better than me.”

Felix sat Eston next to him and put the blanket down next to him.

“Why do you think so?”

“Because Knox got 100 points on the test today, yesterday, last week. But I’m not.”

When he added the last word, the child looked dejected. 

“Mom always won first place in school and Knox is better than me.”

“You know what, Eston?”

No one was listening, but Felix whispered quietly to Eston.

“Dad got zero points on all the tests in the past.”

“Really?”

Eston asked back with his eyes wide open, as if he could not believe what he had just heard.

“In addition, your mom saw my report card.”

“But how did you get married?”

Eston asked, genuinely curious. Felix burst out laughing at the child’s silly question.

“Because mom likes dad.”

“Wow.”

“And she said, ‘You can do it!'” 

Felix said, hugging Eston’s shoulder, looking at his face.

“So no matter how many questions you get wrong on the test, your mom will love you. And she’ll say, “You can do it.” Okay?”

“Yes.”

Eston replied with a much better look.

“Let’s go to Mom now.”

Felix reached out his hand and held the child’s small hand.

“Eston, sit here.”

As they returned by the fire, Lucy tapped the seat next to her and called for Eston. As Eston approached and sat down, Lucy touched his forehead.

“I think you got it too…….”

In addition to his forehead, Lucy muttered, measuring the temperature of his cheeks, neck, and back. Then, she handed out the tea she had already prepared to the child.

“Come on, drink while it’s warm.”

Eston’s eyes met Felix’s as he sipped the tea. The child smiled at him from the other side of the glass.

“It stopped raining!” cried Knox, who was looking at the ceiling. Before they knew it, they couldn’t hear the sound of rain that was making noise on the ceiling.

The children put down their teacups and jumped out of the greenhouse.

“Lucy.”

Felix made a promise to Lucy while only the two of them were left.

“I guess Eston doesn’t like taking the test.”

“Oh, that?”

Lucy nodded and answered.

“I already told the teacher not to give tests from now on.”

The two headed out of the greenhouse where the children were running side by side.

“They’re still young, so they don’t need a test, right?”

Felix held Lucy’s hand instead of answering. The two came out clasping their hands. There was a pleasant smell of moist soil.

“Autumn is the best!”

Lucy said, taking a deep breath.

“Oh, of course it’s a difficult season for you.”

“No, I like it, too.”

Felix shrugged his shoulders and said.

“I got to like it.”

Since I met you, a lot of things have changed for me.

You changed it for me. You turned painful memories to bearable memories and days that I wanted to forget to days I can endure.

And you will continue to give me happy days. So that I can cover all the pain eventually.

Felix clasped her hand in his, promising to do the same to Lucy as well. Lucy held his hand tightly as if responding to the sudden force.

“Dad! Mom!”

In front of them, Knox and Eston were beckoning to come.

The two walked into the happy autumn.