“Phew….”
Diana sat in front of the dressing table and sighed for a long time.
It’s been a long day.
She was so nervous not to ruin the tea party that her fatigue came flooding in.
And Hestia.
“….”
Diana looked at herself in the mirror with red eyes.
It was the first time that my self-esteem collapsed like today. Hestia attacked Diana as if she had been waiting for the day to come. At a time when the objective status of Kaelus’ spouse alone is burdensome.
It was regrettable that she could not arrange her seat at another table due to her status as a marquis’ wife.
“Uh….”
When she thought of Hestia’s black eyes, tears welled up again.
Her heart always felt tight when she was facing her. It was better when she had Heli.
But on this day, when she was being bitten by Hestia in front of people, he was not there.
The court ladies removed Diana’s accessories and undressed her dress with measured hand gestures. Diana stayed still like a doll.
“Let’s go to the bathroom, your highness.”
“….”
Diana walked slowly, her lips clenched.
The royal couple’s dinner table.
Helios looked across at his wife, who was nibbling on food.
“Diana, you did a great job today.”
“…You’re welcome.”
He forced her to smile once, and then she was expressionless again. Diana’s depression was painting the surrounding air.
Helios sighed heavily.
“Would you tell me in detail? What Hestia said at the party earlier.”
“….”
Diana paused her hand.
A heavy silence enveloped them.
“…Heli.”
“Yes, Diana.”
Seeing her companion, who responded without hesitation, Diana finally plucked up courage and took off her lips.
“I feel like my heart is falling apart. I can’t get my act together.”
“!”
Helios sensed that Diana’s condition was unusual.
At the same time, resentment against Hestia flared up. How dare you, to my dear wife!
Diana’s eyes filled with tears before she knew it.
“Heli, am I really wrong?”
“?”
“Was morality, which I believe in, a complete illusion? Am I not supposed to blame Kaelus?”
“…!”
Helios could not immediately respond.
The morality that Diana adheres to remains unquestionable. But if you ask him about criticizing Kaelus.
He couldn’t bear to say ‘You didn’t do anything wrong’.
Diana’s gaze fell down.
“The marchioness told me a story. It happened in that street. A woman murdered a young boy, who turned out to be the criminal who raped her daughter.”
“….”
“Then she asked me. Is she really an immoral person…?”
“….”
A heavy silence fell again.
Helios finally realized. How Hestia attacked Diana.
It’s very clever, isn’t it? How could you shake the faith that Diana had kept firmly with a few words?
It is not difficult to guess why Hestia did so. None other than Kaelus, who she naturally says she loves.
“Diana.”
“….”
“You’ve never thought about this before. But why are you so shaken by Hestia’s words today?”
Diana was not quick to answer his question. In fact, she didn’t even know. Why are you so intimidated by Hestia?
“I don’t know. It’s just, the marquis’ wife makes my heart race.”
“….”
Likewise, Helios felt heavy in his chest as if a lump of stone was in it. The direct cause was definitely Hestia, but there was also an indirect cause.
It’s Kaelus.
A friend who wandered in despair alone while he and Diana dreamed of a happy future. Kaelus, who encountered Helios at the palace, did not give him a glance and passed with Hestia’s hand.
Helios lost a friend who spent most of his life with him.
His mouth opened rather impulsively.
“Diana, should I apologize to Kael?”
“!”
Diana glanced up at Helios.
Apologize to Kaelus? Wouldn’t that be admitting that her accusation was wrong?
“Heli…!”
In fact, she wanted Helios to tell her firmly that she wasn’t wrong.
In an instant, disappointment flooded in.
She wanted him to tell her that Hestia’s accusations were groundless. She wanted him to nail down that the justice and morality that Diana believed in was absolute.
“You can’t do that.”
Diana flatly refused.
Then Helios spoke earnestly to her.
“You and I, we have to throw away the burden in our hearts. Kael is suffering greatly because of us. We owe him a debt, Diana.”
“It’s not his fault that I’m in pain. It’s because of Marchioness Hestia!”
An almost shouting voice.
Helios was lost in thought.
“Diana, she did it for you. You considered him a friend, too. Why are you so cold?”
“I’m a human being who believes in morality and justice before I’m a friend of Kael. What he did wrong was wrong. If you forgive him for being our friend once, and compromise one by one like that, how can justice stand right in the world?”
“Can’t you just understand him? As a result, we all got a lot of help from Kael. If he hadn’t brought down the Duke Orcus, you and I wouldn’t be so happy right now…!”
“Who forced him to help like that? Kael could have chosen the right way! If he didn’t make the Duchess die, there would have been other ways!”
I’m right. I’m not wrong. Diana reiterated her argument.
Tears rolled down her cheeks before she knew it.
“… So, Kael is… Why did you do that?…. Why do you have to abandon him?…!”
“….”
Instead of persuading her more, Helios quietly shut up.
Why was Diana so stubborn? Even though it’s a lifelong belief, she knows it’s faulty, too.
In the face of a crisis in which she had to deny her life itself, Diana instinctively threw a hard armor around her.
No matter what he says now, her heart will not open.
Helios sat alone in his study after eating.
“Whoo….”
Straight Diana. His precious love, who never forgets the righteousness of man.
Diana served as a solid pillar for Helios, who had lived in various struggles and wars, to hold him.
But now it wasn’t just pleasure.
“Hestia, is it….”
He still didn’t know her real purpose. Just for sure, she hates them very much.
The reason for pushing Diana at the tea party was also elegantly wrapped in Kaelus’ honor, but in fact, it must have been because of something more.
To be honest, he was angry with Hestia. On the other hand, however, he acknowledged her argument. Kaelus’ cruelty was not an easy matter to judge by moral standards.
So he tried to persuade Diana. Although he failed to look good.
Helios himself was like this, so what would other nobles do? Perhaps most were persuaded by Hestia’s arguments.
“That’s ridiculous.”
A bitter monologue popped out.
“No, what? ‘I love him?’ Did you know that such a sly woman could love?”
Hestia’s words were very annoying.
The black woman, who doesn’t seem to know what love is, loves not anyone else, but Kaelus? Hasn’t he already been badly burned by love!
Helios called in a sudden surge of displeasure.
“Zenon, bring the brandy.”
The faithful servant who was called rushed to fetch the drink. Then, as the owner usually enjoys, he put it in cold ice water and handed it over.
“….”
As soon as the glass was put into his mouth and the alcohol was spilled, the cold drink went down his neck. Only then did the fire that had been rising from the inside calm down a little.
Helios asked quietly.
“Zenon, how was Diana’s party today?”
“That is, Your Highness. It didn’t sound very pleasant.”
A careful answer. Helios raised one eyebrow.
“Tell me the details.”
Zenon bowed his head apologetically and spoke about the concept of the tea party and the reaction of the aristocracy. While listening, Helios’ expression gradually subsided.
When Diana was preparing for the party, I knew there was a conflict with Madame Merope, the maid of honor. Still, I didn’t think Merope would pull out completely, but unexpectedly, the goal with Diana seemed to have deepened.
He should have looked more carefully. Helios regretted it belatedly.
An involuntary question.
“What did the marchioness say?”
Even after mentioning it, he was slightly dumbfounded. Of all things, Hestia. Why would he care about her reaction?
Zenon answered faithfully again this time.
“She was impressed by the fact that they prepared nostalgic refreshments. And she asked the Crown Princess about Madame Merope’s future.”
“….”
Helios seemed to stand on tiptoe. Isn’t that an incredible experience for a woman who has just entered the aristocratic society?
You have to pull yourself together.
Instinctively felt a danger signal.
You can’t trust Hestia. You shouldn’t keep her close.
But her ability, her foresight, confused Helios. If he couldn’t trust her, what’s the point of having her around?
“Damn it…”
He hated himself for not being able to make a decision at once.
Helios drank a glass of wine roughly in his hand.
Damn, they’re really making Diana bad. I read the spoilers so i know Diana is a bitch, but i wish she wasn’t one. I really can’t judge this novel. From my pov, kael looks like devdas. Crying for lost love, while Hestia is wierd. How can a person feel anger for another person, who they’ve only ever seen from far away? That’s a parasocial relationship she’s in with kaelius. It’s quite convenient how she was able to break in the estate of a marquis, save him, and become accepted by people easily. The most sane person looks like Helios, since I can imagine a real person being like that. I’m pretty sure Helios became wierd after he met Diana. What all four of these require isn’t love, but therapy. Kael needs to realise Diana isn’t the only girl in the world, Diana needs to be told that she’s a narcissist and that she need to change herself, Hestia needs to know that she must touch more grass, and parasocial relationships are extremely wierd, and finally Helios need to be told that he should stay away from these three and focus on development of the country.
Peace✌️
“How can a person feel anger for a person they only had meet from afar?” Honey, it’s called emphaty. You don’t need to be close to someone to feel sorry for the bad things that happens to them and aknowledge their suffering. There are more hints as for why Hestia is so obsessed with her vengeance, too; the fact that she doesn’t even recognized the rest of the characters as a real persons for her this is like writing fanfiction. She still thinks she’ll awake in her real life once she makes sure Kael’s happy.
She separates herself from the characters in the novel. As in, they’re the fictional ones an she’s the new autor of the secuel. For her, this is as fictional as it is for us. Not only that but, if you reread the last conversation with Kael, she remembers living a similar situation as him so… She’s just projecting. She’s punishing the persons that wronged her through the characters of a novel, she doesn’t seemd anything wrong in that because they’re fictional to her.
And as for the therapy thing… That’s why character development exist, and all.
I love your comment. It made me understand Hestia more. After novel ending, thinking she’s rewriting the novel as her fanfiction with fave character Kaelus as her lead (thinking she’s the author)… seemed to be plausible.
Probably you won’t see this reply ever but tbh- I think Hestia’s feelings boil down to her grasping for straws. She was thrown into another world and she had this one thing to ground herself with. Then the novel ended and she assumed she’d get to go home- except she didn’t. And her favourite character committed suicide.
So she ended up kind of hung up on that detail since it happened right when her belief of returning home shattered.
Ngl, even I thought he sounded a bit too much like Devdas. I completely agree with Korra on terms of them needing therapy tbh tho that might be as a psychology student speaking. I don’t like Hestia blaming Helios and Diana too much because imagine if Chamdarmukhi tried to take revenge on Paro and her husband lol. Technically speaking, our dear ML has not done an ounce of the bullshit Devdas had done but still. I too would’ve liked if Diana was a good person tbh. Mostly cause, it’s nice when og FL isn’t a bad person sometimes lol. As it is, she isn’t, so let’s just say Hestia is paying her back for future bullshit she might pull.
Thank you for translating the chapter!
I actually wished I didn’t see the comment before me, because it’s absolutely right (lmao).
I think all four of them need therapy as well, but you know this is fiction and being the receiving end of love is some kind of therapy as well (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)
But, maybe because I came from the Manhwa (They add more background story in the prologue and 1st chapter) I kind of understand why Hestia seems to be so obsessed with Kael. She just lost her purpose of life and the depressed Kael appear. Hestia decided that making Kael happy is now her purpose in this life but ended up being the 1st witness of his s**cide. She was alone, in a strange world, experience a trauma of losing the person she cares the most (in this world) right in front of her eyes. She needed to fix that, she needed to see Kael be right again, happy again, so she can move on. And in the process she fell deeper, I mean it can happen, you know, especially if the man is drop-dead gorgeous with charming personality.
Yes let me be in peace with this justification
I always though she’s lost bit of her marbles after entering this fantasy world, heck she still believes this is a world of fiction. I think she copes with it by giving herself this role of making kael happy. It’s quite interesting read, different from your usual sane FLs. They always seem in control with no problems to deal other then the plot of said story their in. But here we see of a more weird ass protagonist that has maybe a little bit of mental problems that need to be addressed. The ML in other hand definitely needs therapy, I think they mentioned that his parents have died when he was young and he had to have responsibilities put on him early, from what I see he seems to be hard working fellow that hides his emotions to not be seen as an incompetent by other nobles. So when he falls in love and works hard to gain some affection from Diana, the only thing he gets is an ambiguous, vague phrases with a touch of hope, the sad thing is that Diana clearly lead him on for her on benefits to gain some sanding in society.
Don’t get me wrong I still haven’t read the manhwa, but just from the hints I’m getting so far, it’s very apparent that Diana just used the benefits without stating her real feelings toward Kael. Like a wise character from sss-class suicide hunter novel once said “Love starts like a bitch. (Fundamentals)
You are also a bitch. (Advanced)
If you can’t avoid the bitch, enjoy what you can. (Fundamentals)
Become a bigger bitch than the other. (Advanced)”
I always though she’s lost bit of her marbles after entering this fantasy world, heck she still believes this is a world of fiction. I think she copes with it by giving herself this role of making kael happy. It’s quite interesting read, different from your usual sane FLs. They always seem in control with no problems to deal other then the plot of said story their in. But here we see of a more weird ass protagonist that has maybe a little bit of mental problems that need to be addressed. The ML in other hand definitely needs therapy, I think they mentioned that his parents have died when he was young and he had to have responsibilities put on him early, from what I see he seems to be hard working fellow that hides his emotions to not be seen as an incompetent by other nobles. So when he falls in love and works hard to gain some affection from Diana, the only thing he gets is an ambiguous, vague phrases with a touch of hope, the sad thing is that Diana clearly lead him on for her on benefits to gain some sanding in society.
Don’t get me wrong I still haven’t read the manhwa, but just from the hints I’m getting so far, it’s very apparent that Diana just used the benefits with out stating her real feelings toward Kael. Like a wise character from sss-class suicide hunter novel once said “Love starts like a bitch. (Fundamentals)
You are also a bitch. (Advanced)
If you can’t avoid the bitch, enjoy what you can. (Fundamentals)
Become a bigger bitch than the other. (Advanced)”
I always though she’s lost bit of her marbles after entering this fantasy world, heck she still believes this is a world of fiction. I think she copes with it by giving herself this role of making kael happy. It’s quite interesting read, different from your usual sane FLs. They always seem in control with no problems to deal other then the plot of said story their in. But here we see of a more weird ass protagonist that has maybe a little bit of mental problems that need to be addressed. The ML in other hand definitely needs therapy, I think they mentioned that his parents have died when he was young and he had to have responsibilities put on him early, from what I see he seems to be hard working fellow that hides his emotions to not be seen as an incompetent by other nobles. So when he falls in love and works hard to gain some affection from Diana, the only thing he gets is an ambiguous, vague phrases with a touch of hope, the sad thing is that Diana clearly lead him on for her on benefits to gain some sanding in society.
Don’t get me wrong I still haven’t read the manhwa, but just from the hints I’m getting so far, it’s very apparent that Diana just used the benefits with out stating her real feelings toward Kael. Like a wise character from sss-class suicide hunter novel once said “Love starts like a bitch. (Fundamentals)
You are also a bitch. (Advanced)
If you can’t avoid the bitch, enjoy what you can. (Fundamentals)
Become a bigger bitch than the other. (Advanced)”
I love everyone’s thought of each character’s complexity in this comment section. It gives them a more dynamic feeling to it and I agree it’s a very interesting read.. I only saw it from the manhwa and happen to stumble upon it from novelupdates.
Also, I totally respect that one wise character, Raviel. SSS-Class Suicide Hunter is one of my favourite haha.
Thank you for the translatio!
I agree with both comments, wow!
Make the situation more complex. I mean, I would like to see more nuances in Heli and Diana. I understand that Hestia previous experience was horrible, I mean, more than her bias, Kael was the onky who helped her even when he didn’t see a future from himself.
I’m wanting to see they relationship be less parasocial and more partnership, so we can se more of Kael.
Yes
What you need to realize is that this is a novel and your logic does not apply, as well as realism. The author nowhere says love will fix it all, as you can see, Hestia also knows this, that’s why she isnt trying to seduce Kaelus or anything but selflessly supporting him while achieving revenge which is her one selfish desire. You’re looking at this only from your own perspective. Also, people dont wake up just by being told what to do. It isn’t just narcissism, is ignorance by being caged in the flower path of a female lead that only knows things going her way.
I really loved all the comments except for the first one, Koraa. Hehehe Sorry, we don’t share same opinions but it’s your right to share your view.
And now, that I’ve read the comments, I fully understand now why FL can’t really accept her now reality. Realistically, can you? She transmigrated, died and regressed. How can you keep yourself sane?
Thank you for the translation!
Thank you for reading!
Seeing all the views expressed here made me think: everyone has a different view of the world and interpret that on the characters. The beauty of this novel is, that it has just enough absurdness, controversy and relatabilty with less than perfect human seeming characters, that each reader is able to have some imagination as well als empathy. This make ist a darned amazing novel with a good interperter/translator!
Thank you Athanasia for posting!